7 Months
by AuntJackie
Summary: "I still love you and I know you still love me...We have 7 months...It's up to you, Ran." John stared into Randy's eyes. Randy stared into John's eyes, the eyes he'd known and loved for a decade."OK. I'll give us 7 months."
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Wanted to start something new after getting a weird burst of inspiration. I am a big fan of CENTON slash, obviously and so envy people who could write Mpreg. I just can't get a handle on it so I won't even try. I'll stick to my adoption storylines when I want the boys to have children. I can't remember what show I saw that gave me this idea but I wanted to try it. I found the piece of scrap I took the notes on thrown on my desk today and just started writing. Hope you enjoy! **

John Cena shuffled anxiously from one foot to another in front of the St. Louis home he once called his own. He took a deep breath before reaching his hand forward and pressing the doorbell, the chimes echoing inside. One of his feet began a rapid tap on the pavement outside the front door and his eyes darted down, noting with a sigh that even the welcome mat he'd placed there months ago had been removed by his irate, soon to be ex-husband.

The large wooden door suddenly swung open and John's eyes connected with the icy stare of said man. He held the gaze for only a few seconds before swinging it around him to where the small, blond girl ran towards him. John's lips curved into a smile and he bent down, his arms instantly opening to welcome her.

"Daddy John! I'm so happy you're here!"

John lifted the girl into his arms, his eyes closing as he relished in the embrace of the little girl he had raised as his own; the little girl he considered his own despite no blood bond between them. "I'm so happy to be here, too, princess. I missed you so much, Ally."

Alanna raised her head, her eyes as bright blue as her father's but filled with a warmth his had lost. "I missed you, too, Daddy."

"Well, we're gonna spend a whole week together and have tons of fun, OK." John set her down and smiled. Alanna nodded happily and tugged John inside. "Yay! My bag is right here so we could go now..."

John quickly shook his head. "In a bit, baby. I have to talk to Dad for a few minutes first, OK. Could you go watch TV for a little while so we could talk?"

Alanna nodded and looked up at her father, whose face finally softened its hardened expression as he motioned her inside towards the living room. John lifted his eyes back up to his husband's and felt his heart begin to race, the normal reaction for whenever he looked at Randy Orton. The younger man had been making John's heart race for 10 years now and it wasn't changing anytime soon.

"What in the world could you have to talk to me about?"

John's heart dropped at the cold tone coming from Randy's voice, a tone he'd only heard when they'd portrayed enemies on television for work. "Something I'd rather not talk about outside. May I please come inside?"

Randy sighed loudly before taking a step back, opening the door wider so John could step in. John moved quickly past him, careful not to touch him and have him change his mind. He smiled at Alanna, who lay sprawled on the sofa watching TV before continuing on into the kitchen. Randy followed slowly behind, a look of annoyance and indifference on his handsome face. He stood opposite John, keeping the counter between them as his arms crossed over his chest. "All right. I gave you permission to come inside because you wanted to talk so talk. What do you want?"

John couldn't help the short laugh that escaped his lips at Randy's words but regretted it instantly when the younger man's eyes narrowed dangerously. "What the fuck is so funny, Cena?"

"The fact that I'm being given permission to enter my own home," responded John, daring to push the envelope since he knew Randy would never lash out at him with their daughter only a room away.

"This is no longer your home. You lost the right to call this place home when you stuck your dick inside someone else." Randy's hands dropped to his side as he growled at John, his fist clenching tightly. John lifted his head defiantly and glanced at the tightening fists before smirking. "He who stuck his own dick inside someone else shouldn't talk, should he? Let's not forget who was first, babe."

"You should thank the good Lord that little girl is within eye and earshot, Cena. I could so easily kick your ass right now." If possible, Randy's growl grew angrier and the veins on his neck and arms looked ready to burst. John sighed and shook his head. "You could but you're not going to. Look, let's just drop this. I'm sorry I started it. This isn't what I came in here for."

"Then what the hell are you in here for? You came to get Al for the week so just take her and get the fuck out already!" Randy rolled his eyes and turned away, beginning to pace around the room. John watched him silently for a few seconds before speaking up again. "I got a call from the agency. Someone picked us, Ran."

Randy stopped in his tracks, his head spinning around and his eyes widening by the time they connected with John's. "What? Someone picked us?"

John nodded, another laugh escaping him. "Yeah, can you believe it? After being on that list for 3 damn years, now is when someone decides to pick us. She's due to give birth in 7 months and she wants us to adopt her baby."

Randy shook his head, a look of disbelief on his face. "Oh my God. I can't believe this."

"I always said God had a really funny sense of humor when it came to us. This kinda just proved me right." John shrugged and collapsed on a bar stool around the large counter. Randy stared at him and remained silent. He slowly lowered his body onto another stool and looked down at the marble top. "What did you tell them?"

"Not what I should've told them," replied John softly. Randy looked up and frowned. "What?"

"I didn't tell them the truth, Randy. I should've told them the truth. We split up, we're barely speaking, we fucked up this relationship as much as we both could and there's no way we could adopt a child at this stage. I didn't tell them that. I told them that it was great news and that we couldn't wait to meet her." John shrugged once more. "I don't even know why I did it."

Randy's frown softened. "Because we've waited 3 years for this baby; a child to call our own and it's not fair that this is when it happened. God, this isn't fair."

"Maybe it is. Maybe this is the way it should be happening." John shook his head and stared into Randy's confused gaze. "What's to say we would've made it any way? Maybe its best we didn't adopt earlier. We're gonna put Al through hell now. This is going to kill her so maybe it's best we're not doing it to another kid, too."

Randy shook his head dismissively. "Al knows it's OK for parents not to be together. Look at me and Sam."

"She never saw you and Sam together to begin with, Randy! She had no idea what that would be like. She has seen you and me together from the day she was born. You have to blind to not see what we're doing to her. It's killing me inside to know I'm responsible for hurting that little girl in any way." John stopped as he heard his voice increasing with his rising anger.

Randy sighed and looked towards the living room at his daughter. "Well, you're not the only one who's responsible for fucking this up."

"No shit," mumbled John. He quickly held up a hand when he saw Randy's mouth open to respond. "Please, don't. I don't mean to keep up the smart remarks. I don't want to ruin the first real talk we've had in months."

Randy rolled his eyes and leaned forward. "Whatever. I just have one question, though. Why did you even tell me? You should've just told them no and I would've never had to know. What was the point of telling me?"

"I figured you had a right to know. I thought they might call you, too and then you would get even more pissed off at me and the last thing I need is for you to take away the one child I already do have..."

"I would never take Alanna away from you, asshole." Randy interrupted John's rant, his voice full of indignation. "No matter what happened between us, I would never punish her!"

"Well, thank God for court agreements, huh?" mumbled John.

Randy glared at him, his voice as icy as his glare. "Court agreements or not, I still wouldn't keep you away from her." He stood up and began to pace once more, the urge to grab a cigarette after almost a year of not doing so almost overwhelming him. He looked at John once more and shook his head. "You really must think I'm the asshole in this, don't you?"

"No, I don't, Randy. I never have. I would've never wanted another child with you if I thought you were an asshole." John stood up and walked around the counter to stand in Randy's way. "Despite what's happened to us, I can never claim that you aren't an amazing father. I guess that's the real reason I told you. In case you still wanted to do this..."

"I could never raise another child on my own, John." Randy shook his head and looked at Alanna. "You know how much we travel for work and you see how much time we miss with Al...I just couldn't do it on my own."

"That's not what I meant." John took a step closer to Randy's form. "I meant that I told you in case you still wanted to do it all. Not just the adopting but also the trying of the marriage again."

Randy's eyes widened and he quickly took a step back. "Don't, John,"

"I still love you and I know you still love me. If we didn't care about each other we wouldn't still be so pissed at each other. There's still love there, Ran. We have 7 months until this baby is born. We can choose to fix our problems and try to become a family once more or we can decide right now to give up and if we do, I swear I'll call the adoption agency and tell them to look for another couple." John sighed and stared into Randy's eyes, his heart beginning to pound again as he saw the conflicting emotions run over Randy's face. "It's up to you, Ran."

Randy stared into John's eyes, the eyes he'd known and loved for a decade. His entire being vibrated with the need for the older man and he had to fight to stop for pulling him into his arms. The constant memory that plagued him for weeks now of seeing John in bed with another man ran across his mind but he quickly forced it away, focusing on the hope he saw in John's eyes. Taking a deep breath, he slowly nodded. "OK. I'll give us 7 months."

John nodded, unable to stop the smile from spreading across his face. "We got a deal."

**A/N: OK, guys! Review and let me know what you think. I am working on the next chapter of Love Story so don't worry about me starting this new piece. I won't ignore my other baby. **


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Wow, I am so amazed by the reaction this new story has gotten! Thank you all so much! You have no idea how happy it made me and it just made my Memorial Day that much more amazing! I hope you enjoy this second chapter and it lasts you for a bit. Still working on the next chapter of LOVE and will be focusing on that for a few days but will try to update soon! Again, thank you all for reviewing and alerting!**

"They're not talking, Daddy. This is weird and it's making me sleepy," mumbled Alanna as she turned into John's embrace, burying her face in his chest. John smiled and bent to place a kiss on her head. "It's an old cartoon, baby. Tom and Jerry didn't need to talk as much as the cartoons of today do. It's like that Spongebob. He never shuts up."

Alanna smiled sleepily up at him and relaxed back onto the pillow when John slid out from under her. He reached over to the nightstand next to the bed and grabbed his cellphone off the top, quickly dialing the number for Randy's cell. John passed the phone to Alanna and smoothed her hair back. "Say goodnight to Daddy before you go to sleep, sweetheart."

Alanna nodded and pressed the phone to her ear, a smile spreading on her face as she heard Randy's voice. "Hi, Daddy."

John slid out of the bed and walked over to the open balcony doors. He rested his body against the open door and stared out at the blinking nights that lit up the New York City night. Stepping further out into the balcony, John stared down at the people still crowding the streets, the filtered sounds of their laughter and chatter reaching up to his hotel room.

"Daddy John, here. Daddy wants to talk to you."

John turned at the sound of Alanna's voice and took the phone she held in her outstretched hand. John nodded and replied, "I'll be inside in a few minutes, baby."

Alanna smiled and headed back inside the room, climbing back onto John's bed. John turned his attention back out to the city lights and slowly lifted the phone to his ear. "Hey, how's it going?"

"It's going. I'm a little bored."

Randy's voice sounded tired and strained but the soft drawl never failed to put a smile on John's face.

"I can imagine. It gets lonely on the road. I'm glad I have Ally with me this week."

Randy sighed in John's ear. "Lucky. I should've kept her with me so I could at least have someone to talk about cartoons with."

John laughed softly. "You can get dressed and go out with the boys, Ran. There's no reason for you to be cooped up inside a hotel room in LA..."

"Well, I did go out. I went to a meeting earlier after the show. You know I can't go anywhere else for at least a couple more months. Temptation and all, remember?"

Randy's voice sounded amused but John groaned loudly and lowered his head to his hands. "God, I'm such a moron. I can't believe I forgot."

"It's OK. It's not something I want to talk about much anyway." The amusement quickly faded from Randy's voice. "I just wanted to ask you where you were going after Raw on Monday. Are you coming back to St. Louis or to Tampa? I need to know what plane ticket I'm booking."

John frowned and quickly lifted his head up. "What?"

"Is the question so difficult, Cena?" responded Randy, some amusement coming through once more.

John smiled. "Well, yeah. You just said like 2 things I can't believe you said. You actually want me to come back to St. Louis? You would actually go to Tampa? I just can't believe it..."

"Well, didn't we agree to try to work things out again? I gave you 7 months, John. I don't want to waste a minute of it but if you do then by all means you go to Tampa and I'll stay in St. Louis."

John's eyes widened and he quickly answered. "No! No, come to Tampa, please! I didn't realize you wanted to start working on things so soon. You just seemed so mad at me the other night even though you agreed to work things out..."

"John, I am still mad at you. I'm also mad at myself for my mistakes. I do want to try to work on things, though and I know it's going to take some time so maybe it's best if we start soon." Randy sighed in his ear once more. "I don't even know if this is going to work but I'm willing to try."

"So am I, Ran. I want nothing more than to work things out no matter how hard it will be." John smiled slowly turned back towards the room.

"OK, then. I'll talk to you tomorrow and see you in Tampa in a few days."

"OK. Have a good night." John closed the balcony door and walked back to his bed, smiling when he saw Alanna already asleep. He placed the phone back on the nightstand and slid into bed beside his daughter, shutting the television off as he threw the covers over both of them. The smile remained on his face as he played the end of his conversation with Randy over in his head. It seemed too good to be true that he and Randy were both open to give their relationship another try.

As quickly as the happiness spread over John's body, another phrase from the conversation made it all fade away.

_"Well, I did go out. I went to a meeting earlier after the show. You know I can't go anywhere else for at least a couple more months. Temptation and all, remember?" _

John closed his eyes tightly, fighting the images Randy's statement reminded him of from entering his mind. A loud sigh escaped John's lips at the familiar tightening of his chest and his heart began to race as he lost the battle. John's hands subconsciously tightened into fists as the events from only a few months before replayed in his head.

* * *

_Months earlier..._

_John's jaw clenched as he clutched the note from Randy in his balled up fists. His strides grew longer as he walked through the hotel lobby, headed for the bar in the main room. The woman at the Reception Desk smiled over at him but John ignored it and headed for the large door leading into the bar. Even at the late hour of almost 1 AM, the bar was packed, mostly with his fellow WWE co-workers. A quick scan of the tables and he spotted Randy, laughing loudly with a beer in hand, surrounded by the few men he considered close friends. John's eyes moved over them quickly, his gaze choosing to settle on the one friend that had been gone for years and only recently returned; the one friend John wished would've chosen to stay away forever. _

_John's legs slowly carried him closer to the table, the anger that had turned into momentum now fading away slightly. "Hello, everyone."_

_All eyes turned to John and greetings were quickly thrown his way but John's eyes had now locked on Randy's. The younger man stood up and walked around the table, pulling John in for a tight embrace and leading him away from the table. "Hey, baby. I'm so glad you chose to come down with us. Want a beer?"_

_John pulled back from the hug and stared into Randy's face. "I didn't come down to be with you guys. I came down to get you and bring you upstairs, Randy. I'm sick of coming back to an empty room every night. I'm tired of your attitude lately. You're a grown man with responsibilities but you haven't been acting like it since your little buddy came back. It's time to grow up and rejoin me back in the real world."_

_Randy frowned and removed himself from John completely. "What the hell are you talking about, John? I'm just relaxing a little bit after work. Can you go back to acting more like the hubby and not like my dad?" He laughed softly and turned away, intending to walk back towards the table with his friends but John's hand clamped around his wrist and pulled him back. Randy's body crashed into John's and he stared at the older man in shock, his eyes widening. "What the fuck are you doing, John?"_

_John stared into his eyes and frowned. "Are you doing something again with Brock?"_

_Randy's eyes widened even further and he pulled his hand away angrily. "What?"_

_John's gaze continued boring into him, his jaw clenched tightly. "Are you two getting stoned together again...or taking something even stronger?"_

"_No, asshole! We've only had a couple of beers tonight and every other night we've hung out together! Do you really think I'm so weak I would give up 4 years of being clean because Lesnar is back?" Randy desperately tried to keep his voice level in an effort not to draw attention over to him and John. _

"_I would hope not, Randy but I don't really know. I'm not as sure of Brock's good intentions as you are. I don't trust the guy, I never have. He's a fuck up and he wants everyone to fuck up along with him." John shook his head. "You've changed since he came back and I don't think you would be able to resist him offering you something."_

"_Well, sorry to disappoint you, Cena but he hasn't offered me anything. Besides, I'm not so gullible that I would take it if he did." Randy glared at John defiantly. "It's nice to know how much trust you have in me. Why don't you just go back upstairs because you're the last person I want around me right now."_

_John sighed and shrugged. "Look, I'm sorry, all right. You've just been acting different and I worry..."_

"_Well, stop then. I don't plan on falling back into my old routine like when I used to hang out with Brock or Dave. I've changed since then, for the better. I also have something I didn't have back then. I have a family that I love, John. I don't plan on giving you or Al up just for some fun with the boys. Nothing is going to change, baby. Why can't you see that?" Randy tentatively reached for John's hand but the older man took a step back, moving away from him. John shook his head and lowered his gaze to the floor. "And why can't you see things have already changed?"_

_Randy frowned and shook his head but before he could utter a response, John turned on his heel and walked out of the bar. _

* * *

Thousands of miles away, Randy sat in his hotel room alone, the evening news playing on the television a few feet away from him. His eyes focused on the images playing before him but he didn't hear a word they said. His mind spinning, disturbed by memories he'd try to suppress and the constant what if questions he'd had since that night. It was something Randy never let get the better of him. He tried to live his life in the moment, with no regrets and no questioning of his decisions. That one night, though; that one night changed his way of thinking forever and made him wonder how his life would be different had he'd followed John out of that bar.

* * *

_Months earlier..._

_Randy's mouth dropped open in surprise as he watched John walk away from him and out of the bar. Before he could make the decision to either follow him or go back to the table full of his friends, a heavy arm clamped around his shoulder. Randy looked to his side and met the smirking face of one his oldest friends and the man causing the tension between him and John. _

"_What's up with your boy, Ran?"_

_Randy shook his head and pushed the thoughts of John's anger out of his mind, choosing to go rejoin his friends at their table. "I don't know."_

_Brock shook his head and looked towards the door John had exited from. "Cena will never change, will he? Still playing Dad to all of us. If he's not in for some fun, he damn sure doesn't want us to have any either. Especially you."_

"_Of course he's gonna be extra crazy when it comes to keeping Randy on a short leash! He knows everyone who lays eyes on his man can't help but wonder if they could ever get a piece of him," spoke up Cody Rhodes, a smirk on his lips as he lifted his beer up. _

"_And it's so fucking obvious who's at the top of that list, Rhodes," replied Brock, his eyes rolling. _

"_Hey,God gave me eyes to see and I just happen to like what I see so..." Cody shrugged and laughed, setting the beer down. _

"_Can you two just shut the fuck up?" Randy's eyes narrowed and he looked at both Cody and Brock. "Let's forget about John and get wasted. I need to tonight more than ever."_

_Brock smiled and motioned to their table, yelling at the bartender to bring over a couple of bottle of vodka and tequila. He turned towards the table and held up a glass. "Let's get wasted, boys."_

_It was hours later when Randy looked up at the clock and realized he had drunken the night away. The sun was less than an hour from rising and he hadn't heard from John since he'd stormed out of the bar earlier. His eyes, glassy and unfocused looked around the table to see his friends still going strong. A sudden rise of nausea made his eyes close and Randy suddenly stood, clutching the back of his chair as he rose. _

"_You OK there, buddy?"_

_Randy nodded and walked around Brock's chair. "I need to get some air. It's been a long time since I go in this hard."_

_Brock stood and wrapped an arm around Randy's shoulder. "Let go outside then. Can't have my buddy quitting on me so soon."_

_Randy laughed as he was led outside to the hotel patio, grateful for the support of Brock's arm as he stumbled numerous times. He shook his head and looked up at the sky. "So soon? We've been drinking all night and all morning! I can't believe I'm still standing."_

_Brock led Randy further out and let him lean against a tree. "A couple more days with me, Ran and you'll get back to how you used to be and shake this boring ass man you've become."_

_Randy closed his eyes and shook his head slowly. "No, I can't. I'm not like that anymore. I have John and a kid and I can't..."_

"_Just because you have a family doesn't mean you're dead, Ran. You could still have some fun, bro. Thank God I came back so I can save from becoming into even more of a bore." Brock stood in front of Randy and shook him by the shoulders. Randy groaned and pushed him away, opening his eyes slowly. "Stop or I'm gonna puke all over you, man."_

_Brock laughed and dug into his back pocket, pulling out a pack of cigarettes. "All right, Ran. You're seriously killing me here. Come on, let's at least share a smoke."_

"_Nope, I don't smoke any more, either." Randy laughed softly. "Anything!"_

_Brock rolled his eyes as he stuck the cigarette in his mouth and lit it. "Seriously, you're killing me. Will you please stop?" He took a puff and passed held it to Randy, who eyed it warily. "One won't kill you, Ran."_

_Randy sighed and extended his hand, taking the cigarette between his fingers. He stared at it for a few seconds before bringing it to his lips and inhaling deeply. Slowly letting out the smoke, Randy closed his eyes once more. "God, that feels so good. I missed that."_

"_I know. And the world isn't going to end just because you're having one." Brock quickly lit another one when Randy extended the stick back to him. "Nah, you keep that one. You need it more than I do."_

_Randy nodded in agreement and continued smoking, letting the sensations wash over him. The men smoked in silence for a few minutes, enjoying the silence of the night. Once done, Randy stubbed the butt of the cigarette out on the tree and stood up, leaning off the base. The sudden movement caused another bout of nausea and he quickly collapsed back on the tree as the ground started to spin beneath him. "Whoa, what the hell..."_

_Brock looked over at him, an amused grin on his face as he watched Randy struggle. "Just relax. It'll get better."_

_Randy frowned and tried to stand up again, slower this time. "What will get better? What are you talking about?"_

"_Promise you won't get mad at me? Just remember I did it for your own good." Brock moved over to him and held up his half gone cigarette. "These aren't just smokes."_

_Randy shook his head and tried to focus on Brock and the words coming out of his mouth, despite how blurry his mind felt. "What? What did you give me?"_

_Brock held up his hands. "Don't go crazy. They're still cigs. They're just laced with a little something extra for when you need to calm down and forget your worries so you could have a little fun. Just embrace it, bro."_

_Randy shook his head from side to side before reaching up to grasp it in both hands. He hurried away from Brock, struggling to keep his balance as the alcohol and drugs mixed in his system, causing him to stumble as his mind spun. "Oh my God,"_

"_Relax, bro. You're freaking out over nothing," Brock frowned in annoyance and followed after Randy as he stumbled over the patio. "It's not even that strong and no one will find out. It'll be out of your system in a few hours."_

"_I've been clean for almost 4 years, asshole! Add that to the fact that I've been drinking all night and I'm fucked!" Randy eyes were wide in his face and he headed for the patio door. Brock quickly grabbed his arm and held him back. "Where the hell are you going?"_

"_I need to get to my room. I can't do this again. I can't...I stopped this a long time ago...4 years and I haven't...I need to go..." Randy stopped when he realized he was rambling and took a deep breath. He reached for Brock's hand and tried to pull it off his arm. "Let go of me,"_

"_No, not until you calm down! You're freaking out right now and I get it. You're scared John's gonna find out but he won't if you just let me get you through this. We can all go to my room and just ride it out. It's gonna get more intense before it gets better but I can get you through it. Just trust me, bro. This isn't my first time," Brock spoke slowly and calmly, trying to get Randy to understand. _

"_You're the last person I want around me right now." Randy finally pulled free and stumbled backwards from the force. "John was right about you. I should've listened to him."_

"_Yes, John is a saint. He's so fucking good, isn't he?" Brock rolled his eyes. "Fine, then go with him and let him see you high off your ass. If I recall correctly, he used to love seeing that, right? It was one of the best times in your relationship, right?" He laughed loudly, the sarcasm in it evident. _

_Randy's heart began to race and he didn't know if the cause was the drug or the truth behind Brock's words. It was a well-known fact that John had practically cut all ties to him during the worst of his drug abuse period. Numerous people had tried to help Randy get better but no one more than John. When the older man had seen it was all being done in vain, he'd chosen to leave and let Randy hit rock bottom, which he had when he almost overdosed in front of his wife. It took him months to get John back on his side but he had made it clear; one more round of messing with drugs and there would be no more forgiveness. _

"_Shut your fucking mouth," growled Randy in Brock's direction. Brock laughed loudly, the sound echoing around the empty patio. His eyes suddenly swung over the patio door as it swung open. Cody walked out, a frown on his face. His eyes darted back and forth between Brock and Randy. _

"_What's going on, guys?"_

_Brock tossed his now finished cigarette to the ground and headed back towards the bar. "Your boy is fucked up real good over there. That's what's going on. I trust you can take care of him since he doesn't want me or his man around him right now."_

_Cody's frown deepened and he hurried over to Randy, lifting him up slightly and immediately noting the dilated pupils. "Holy shit, Ran. What did you take?"_

_Randy shook his head and collapsed onto Cody's body, unable to answer. Cody wrapped his arms around him, holding him up. "It's all right, Ran. I'll take care of you. Let's just go up to my room, OK."_

_Randy lifted his head to meet Cody's eyes, the younger man smiling tentatively. He nodded and wrapped an arm around his waist, following him out of the patio and through the bar and leaving Brock and the table full of men behind. _

* * *

The bright sunshine had awoken Randy the following morning and he'd come to with the worst headache of his life; a headache that had only intensified when he'd seen a naked Cody lying in bed beside him and the discarded condoms on top of the rumbled bedsheets.

Randy groaned loudly and shut off the television, pitching the room into darkness. He lowered his body further into the bed, throwing the covers over his head and willing sleep to take him away from his thoughts.

**A/N: Many more blanks to fill in this relationship and I promise I will continue filling them with the upcoming chapters. REVIEW and let me know what you think of this one!**

**A/N 2: GOD BLESS OUR TROOPS; PAST, PRESENT AND FUTURE!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: OK, so I know I said I was going to be working on the Love Story update (and I am) but I got distacted. My brain seems to want me to write this story a bit more so I will indulge it. **

_Randy groaned loudly and slowly opened his eyes. His forehead instantly creased into a frown and his eyes closed tightly as the sunlight and pain hit him simultaneously. He threw an arm over his eyes and turned over slightly, coming into contact with another warm body next to his. Randy sighed softly and removed his arm from his head, moving it to lie around the waist of his lover and burying his face against John's back as he inhaled deeply. He lowered the sheet covering John's body and frowned, his eyes coming into contact with the unfamiliar skin. _

"_John…"_

_Randy sat up in the bed and flipped a light switch on, his eyes protesting the move. He yanked the blanket roughly off the body in bed with him and his eyes widened in alarm. "Cody!"_

_Randy launched his body out of bed, the cool air in the room immediately hitting his uncovered body. His face reddened and he anxiously searched for something to cover up with as Cody turned over in the bed, rubbing his face. "Hey,"_

_Randy found his jeans partially hidden under the bed and quickly pulled them out and slid them on. His confused gaze met Cody's and he frowned. "Hey? Hey? Is that all you have to say to me?"_

_Cody slowly shrugged and raised an eyebrow. "Last night was fun?"_

_Randy's mouth dropped open in a silent gasp. His eyes scanned the room anxiously and he groaned inwardly as he saw the scattered clothes everywhere and the surefire sign of what had taken place the night before on the rumpled bed sheets, the empty condom wrappers and used condoms._

"_Last night was fun? Oh my God, Cody, what the hell happened here?" Randy dropped his head into his hands and groaned. "No, I know what happened! How did it happen, Cody?"_

_Cody frowned and met Randy's eyes and he finally lifted his head. "What do you mean how? We wanted to so we did…" He swung his legs over the side of the bed and stood, shrugging once more. "Why are you freaking out about this?"_

_Randy held a hand up and shook his head. "Are you fucking serious? Can you put some fucking clothes on?"_

_Cody looked down at his body and rolled his eyes as he bent to look for something to put on. "I don't get what the big deal is. You've seen it all before and you damn sure saw it all last night. After what we did I don't think we need to act shy around one another, Ran."_

"_How did this happen, Cody?" asked Randy, repeating his earlier question. He began to pace around the room, his head throbbing with each step he took. "Last thing I remember is going off on Brock and you coming out into the patio. How did we get from there to here?"_

_Cody finally found his jeans and slid them on slowly. He met Randy's intense glare and slowly smiled. "He gave you something and it messed you up, Ran. I took care of you. I bought you up here and called John. I told him we had moved the party up to my room and you had passed out so he should go to sleep and not worry. After that, you said you wanted to repay my kindness. You were throwing yourself at me, Ran. You came up to me and started taking my clothes off…I mean, I wasn't going to stop you or turn you down. You know I've wanted this for a while now so…"_

"_Oh my God, stop. You're making me sick." Randy moved one arm around his waist, hugging his midsection tightly. "How could you let this have happened, Cody? You're supposed to be my friend!"_

"_Hey, like I said, you were throwing yourself at me!" Cody's voice rose in anger but confusion clouded his features. "You started taking your clothes off and coming at me!"_

"_I was drunk and high! I have never cheated on John and I never would. You know I would never do that when sober! You took advantage of the fact I wasn't!" Randy's voice also rose, booming throughout the room. _

"_Oh, don't give me that shit. You told me you were fine! I asked you if you were sure; if you understood what we were doing! You said you were, that you wanted it just as bad as I did. The last thing on your mind last night was John. You weren't thinking about him or anyone but me and you made it clear. Don't tell me I took advantage of you." Cody rolled his eyes, his voice full of conviction. "I know you're worried about John's reaction. I can promise you I'll be keeping my mouth shut. I didn't delude myself into thinking you actually cared about me."_

"_That's not the point, Cody." Randy's voice lowered slightly but the anger remained. "The point is that you knew I would never have done what we did last night. I know how you feel for me, Cody and I would never take advantage of that. Not only because I'm married but because you're one of my closest friends. I can't believe you let this happen. I thought you were better than this."_

"_Stop blaming me for this! You wanted it, you asked me for it! I tried to stop you but you didn't listen. What part of that don't you understand?" Cody raised his hands in frustration and reached in his pockets, searching for some cigarettes. _

"_And what part of I wasn't myself last night don't **you** understand? You know me, Cody and you know the me last night isn't who I am. Whether you admit it or not, you took advantage of a situation that you know is wrong. I'm not saying I'm innocent in this but you have made this a hell of a lot more difficult than it had to be." Randy shook his head and reached down to the ground once more, picking up his t-shirt and underwear. He slid his feet into his sneakers and glared up at Cody once more. _

"_I don't know how you could live knowing what an asshole thing you did but I sure cant. I will be telling John the truth no matter what it costs me. Good luck dealing with him when he comes looking for you." Randy turned on his heel and quickly walked out of Cody's room, letting the door slam behind him. He practically ran down the hall to the elevator, his t-shirt and underwear clutched in his hands. Once inside, Randy leaned back against the cool metal back, the enormity of what he had done hitting him along with the rising feeling of nausea. His eyes watered as an image of John flew past his closed eyes and Randy quickly clutched his stomach once more. _

_The elevator opened with it a ding and Randy wiped the moisture from his eyes as he stepped out and headed for his room. He dug into his back pocket, finding his phone and wallet and pulled out the key card for his room. Randy took a deep breath, hesitating as he stood in front of the room he shared with John. He knew the older man would be inside and didn't have any idea how he would begin to explain to him what he'd done. _

_Slowly pushing the door open, Randy blinked a few times as the bright sunlight lighting up the room hit him. He scanned the room for John and didn't see him but heard water running in the bathroom. Randy dropped the clothes he held in his hand onto the ground and slowly headed for the room the noise was coming from as John exited the room wiping his hands on a towel. His eyes met Randy's, his eyebrow arching when he saw the disheveled state the younger man was in. _

"_Well, it's nice of you to come back. I see you obviously had a lot of fun last night."_

_Randy shook his head, his eyes watering once more when he heard the coldness in John's voice. He took a step closer, aching to pull John into his arms. "No, I didn't. I'm sorry I didn't leave with you when you came."_

_John frowned and looked at Randy carefully. He scanned his naked upper half and then met his teary eyes. "What happened last night? What's wrong with you?"_

_Randy lowered his eyes, unable to meet John's stare any longer. A tear escaped and he quickly moved his hand to brush it away. He heard John take a couple of steps closer to him and seconds later felt his hand on his bare hips. "Ran, what's wrong?"_

_Randy looked up and reached for the hand John had placed on his waist. He lifted it to his lips and kissed it, meeting John's confused gaze as he did so. "I love you so much, John."_

_John's gaze softened and he smiled slowly. "I know you do and I love you, too, Randy. I would never stop just because you go out with the boys, if that's what you're worrying about. I do wish, though, that our love kept you home a little bit more lately."_

_Randy nodded, still gripping John's hand tightly. "It should. I should've been with you last night instead of with them. If I had been, then none of this would've happened." _

"_Nothing did happen, Ran. Let's just forget last night and promise to try to work harder on staying home from now on." John smiled as Randy quickly nodded and pulled him in for a tight hug and __pressed his lips to John's in a hard, needy kiss._

_John pulled back slowly and licked his lips. "I guess you did miss me last night." _

_Randy pulled John back in and let their lips hover together. "I'll regret last night for the rest of my life, John. I need to be selfish right now, though and kiss you one more time…" He crushed his lips against John's, tightly clutching the older man to him. John quickly responded despite wondering what had brought on the sudden neediness in his husband. _

_Randy drew back from that kiss, a brutal kiss that left both their lips swollen and them breathless. John watches Randy's eyes, full of sadness, and his hands rose to capture his face as their lips join once again. This time the kiss was softer, initiated by John and directed by him, and he swept his tongue in lazy, languid motions that swiped over Randy's lower lip. Randy's hands continued to grasp John's hips until the older man pulled away. _

_John laughed softly as he rested his forehead against Randy's. "OK, baby, this is getting a little too intense. Its making me think something is wrong. Are you sure you're OK?"_

_Randy kept his eyes closed, his heart racing. "No. I slept with Cody last night." His eyes opened just in time to see John's widen, his mouth falling open in a silent gasp as he moved back, away from him. Randy's lips began to tremble as he tried to keep his emotions in check and not fall apart before explaining to John what had happened. "I'm sorry, John. I was drunk and then Brock gave me something in a cigarette. I didn't know it had anything, I swear to you! Cody took me back to his room to let it pass but I don't remember anything after walking out of the bar with him. I woke up this morning in bed with him and he told me what happened. I don't remember it, John and you know if I had been sober I would never have done it! Please, John, please. You have to forgive me."_

_John stared back at Randy, his face devoid of emotion as he moved further away from him. He tuned to face the dresser in the room and quickly walked over to it, grabbing his wallet and phone from the top. "Pack your shit and get out. I suggest you not be here when I get back."_

* * *

The loud, shrill scream of the bedside alarm clock awoke Randy with a jolt and his eyes snapped open, connecting with the ceiling of the hotel room. Despite the sudden shock of his wakeup, he was thankful to have awoken and have escaped the dream that had been plaguing him for months now. It was amazing to him that despite how good he was at burying other bad memories, this one seemed to find a way to keep torturing him.

Randy sighed as he turned over in the bed but made no move to get up, instead choosing to stare out the window. He took slow, deep breaths, willing his heart to slow down from the rapid pace at which it beat. It had become a normal wakeup for him now; to be awakened by the memory of one of his worst days ever. It had been the beginning of the end for him and John but for some reason, at that moment, he hadn't thought of it that way.

To think about it now, Randy realized he had been either incredibly naïve or just plain delusional to think John would've forgiven him. He should've known the man would kick him out of his life. Randy had left the room that day and given John all the space he'd wanted while still reassuring him of his love for him and of how sorry he was for what he'd done. John had ignored all of Randy's attempts and made it clear their marriage was over. A betrayal of that sort was unforgivable in John's book but Randy had convinced himself the older man would find a way to look past it for him. What he never expected was for John to get revenge on him in a way that would turn Randy into the same angry and bitter man John had become.

Randy groaned and slowly stood up. He walked over to the desk near the large window and fired up his iPad. The app for his favorite airline stared back at him and he tapped it, bringing it to life. He filled in the required information to book his ticket for home that following day but when it came time to type in his destination city, Randy hesitated. Did he really want to go to Tampa and attempt this relationship again with John? After all the things they had done to each other, hurtful and vengeful things, could there really be a way to still work it out? Would they be able to start anew, forgiving and forgetting?

The empty box stared back at Randy and he quickly made a decision. He would be leaving Los Angeles and getting on a flight back to home…his home in Tampa.

**A/N: OK, so review and let me know what you think. I promise I will work on Love's update this weekend! Have a good one, all!**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Update time!**

Randy pulled his car up the drive to the private community his and John's home was in. The guard manning the security checkpoint at the entryway stepped out and smiled as Randy's car approached.

"Mr. Orton! Long time no see, sir."

Randy smiled and stopped the car. "Yeah, it has been awhile, Fred. How's it going? How's the family?"

"All's well, sir. Thank you for asking." Fred leaned on the side of Randy's car and motioned inside the gated community. "Mr. Cena arrived about an hour ago with Ms. Alanna."

Randy nodded, his heart beat increasing and his stomach churning with just the sound of John's name but he forced the smile to remain on his face. "OK, great. I should go then. A week without my daughter and it feels like an eternity. I can't wait to see her."

Fred frowned momentarily before nodding back and stepping aside, allowing Randy's car to move through. Randy caught the confused glance and noticed too late how his remark must have sounded to Fred. He said he had missed Alanna and couldn't wait to see her but made no mention of John. Inwardly groaning and cursing his loose tongue, Randy continued on the path, past the other homes and heading towards his at the end of the road's curve.

As the large home came into view with John's car parked in the driveway, Randy forced himself to relax. This wasn't a strange home he was pulling up to. This was his home…even if he hadn't been there for what felt like months. He had every right to be there that John did. They had purchased the home together after their small Boston wedding years earlier. Both men knew they wanted children together, Randy mainly. He had loved the child he'd had with Samantha and was anxious to have another, especially after seeing John accept Alanna as his own. There was no doubt in his mind John deserved to have a child he could raise as his own and have all legal rights to. Neither man had known the wait for an adoption would hit 3 years or that their marriage would take a turn for the worst in the meantime.

Randy parked his car behind John's and slowly stepped out of the safety of its confines. He pulled his rolling suitcase out of the backseat and let the door slam, the sound echoing throughout the quiet grounds. As he walked up the stone path leading to his front door, Randy took deep breaths, trying to calm his racing nerves. He wiped his sweaty hand on his jeans before reaching forward and pushing the door open. The suitcase dropped from his hand as he left it against the wall in the foyer and Randy frowned as only silence greeted his arrival.

"Hello?"

The sound of laughter drew Randy's gaze toward the back of the house and his feet quickly carried him in that direction. His lips curved into a smile as his eyes landed on John and Alanna eating lunch at the patio table, papers and crayons strewn over the surface along with plates of half eaten pizza.

"Hey, guys,"

Alanna quickly turned over at the sound of Randy's voice, a wide smile on her face and a happy squeal escaping her lips. "Daddy!"

Randy bent to welcome her into his arms as she raced towards him. He held her tightly against him as he placed kiss after kiss on her head, a smile on his face, as well. "My baby, I missed you so much, sweetie."

"I missed you, too, Daddy." Alanna squeezed Randy's neck tightly before pulling back. "I'm so happy you're here. We're eating pizza because there's no food here. Daddy John says we have to go grocery shopping but you have to make the list."

Randy nodded, his smile faltering at the mention of John's name. His eyes moved over Alanna's head and connected with John's briefly before quickly turning away and locking back onto his daughter's. "Well, I'll take care of it. Why don't you go finish your lunch?"

Alanna shook her head and wiggled her way out of Randy's embrace, grabbing his hand instead. "I finished but you have to eat now! Come,"

Randy shook his head and tried to resist her small tugs on his hand. "No, baby, I ate a little while ago…I'm not hungry, OK."

Alanna frowned up at him and continued tugging. "No, come eat! You have to say hi to Daddy, too."

Randy groaned softly and peered up at John, who had begun cleaning up the table, not involving himself in his and Alanna's conversation. His mind spun as he frantically thought of a way to avoid John for a few more hours while keeping his daughter none the wiser to what he was doing. While Alanna knew things had changed between her fathers, both Randy and John had still not told her their marriage was practically dead. They had happily let her assume the splitting of homes and the fact they barely spent time together anymore was only due to work.

"Daddy?" Alanna looked up at Randy, a confused frown on her face as he refused to move from where he stood.

"All right, all right." Randy shook his head and gave in to her insistence, sighing softly. He trudged behind her, getting closer and closer to John with each step until he was only a few feet away from him, careful to still leave some distance, though.

John smiled hesitantly, trying to remain as calm as possible for Alanna's sake and making no effort to close the gap between them. "Hey, how was your flight?"

Randy shrugged and finally locked onto John's eyes. "Fine. It was your typical flight."

John's smile wavered and he nodded. "OK. Are you hungry?"

"No, I ate earlier." Randy's hand was finally released by Alanna and he quickly crossed his arms over his chest.

"OK, I guess I'll go put this inside…" John began, grabbing the pizza box and starting to move towards the backyard door.

"Daddy!"

Randy and John both looked down at Alanna's yell but Randy was the first to recover. "What, Al? My God,"

Alanna stared at him accusingly. "You didn't hug and you're talking weird. What's wrong?"

Randy rolled his eyes and waved away Alanna's concern, the small girl unaware of how close she was to figuring out the truth. "Let's go inside, Al. Nothing is wrong."

Alanna frowned, her gaze saddening. "But…"

"Ally, nothing is wrong, baby," spoke up John, quickly setting the pizza box down and approaching Randy. Their arms brushed together and John felt Randy instantly stiffen but ignored his reaction as he smiled down at Alanna. "Daddy's just tired."

John turned over, reaching for Randy's arms and uncrossing them. He held Randy's hands tightly linked with his own, his eyebrow arching as he silently asked him to play along. "Right, Ran?"

Randy slowly nodded, his heartbeat having begun its race as soon as he felt John touch him. "Yeah, I am."

"Everything's fine, baby." John smiled down at Alanna before pulling Randy in for a hug, the younger man standing stiffly in the embrace. "Will you at least make a fucking effort?" he hissed sharply in Randy's ear and slowly felt him respond, his own hands wrapping around John's waist. They remained in the embrace for only a few seconds before pulling apart and simultaneously taking steps away from each other. Despite the awkward hug and reaction after, Alanna seemed satisfied and moved to the table to help John clean up. John quickly followed suit, the two busying themselves with cleaning up after their lunch and it gave Randy the perfect opportunity to make his escape.

Randy practically ran out of the backyard into the house. He grabbed his luggage from the hall and dragged upstairs, his feet automatically leading him into the bedroom he'd shared with John for years now. As the suitcase dropped from his hand, Randy froze in the doorway of the room, staring at the new furniture and unfamiliar décor. He tentatively took a step into the room, leaving his suitcase by the door. His hands reached out to touch the smooth wood on top of the dresser before continuing forward to look at the bed. Randy's eyes narrowed as they traveled up and down the neatly made bed, all happy memories of the nights he and John spent there erased and replaced by the memory of John in that bed with another man.

"Hey, how do you like it?"

Randy lifted his head at the sound of John's voice, the older man standing awkwardly in the doorway. He turned away and shrugged before responding, "It's not bad. I'm still not sleeping here, though."

John nodded, a small smile on his face. "I figured you wouldn't but I swear that I still had everything changed. Obviously the furniture but also the mattress and even the drapes..."

"It doesn't matter," replied Randy quickly, his lips curving into a smirk. John rolled his eyes and shrugged. "Fine. Just stay here until Al falls asleep then you can go to the guest room, OK?"

"I was planning on doing that. I don't want her to notice any more tension between us." Randy moved away from the bed and headed for the closet. "Do I still have clothes in here or did you move them to the other room?"

"Yeah, I noticed how badly you didn't want her to notice the tension by that wonderful performance you gave downstairs. The hug was great," mumbled John. He sighed and leaned on the doorframe. "Yes, your clothes are still in that closet. This will always be your room, Ran."

"The hug took me by surprise. I was caught off guard by her reaction and insistance something was wrong. I know it looked weird but I'll try to work on it. All I can do is promise to try that." Randy turned away from John and headed inside the large walk-in closet, ignoring his other statement. He emerged a few minutes later, his arms loaded with clothes. "That hug was brutal, John. Tell me you know that."

John nodded and turned around quickly, ensuring Alanna was not in earshot. "It was. I don't think a hug between us has ever felt so weird, even during some of the bad times we've had before."

"Kinda made me feel like shit there. Also makes me wonder..." Randy dropped the clothes onto the handle of his suitcase and avoided John's gaze. "Are we really gonna make this work? Can we? We can't even hold hands without cringing."

John took a deep breath and moved up off the door. He took a couple of steps towards where Randy stood. "I don't know, Ran. We put each other through hell and broke the trust we had in each other by doing the unforgivable. It's gonna take time to build it back up. One day won't do it."

"But you think we can trust each other again? That we'll be able to touch and not cringe at one point in the future?" Randy slowly smiled and raised an eyebrow. "Why? What makes you so confident, Cena?"

"The fact that we're here together so I know we're at least willing to try," replied John, a confident smile on his face. "Now, can you unpack and make me a grocery list so I can go to the market with Ally?"

* * *

Hours later, John sat in his bed, Alanna beside him and Randy lying beside her. It had only taken a pout from Alanna to make Randy get on the bed he'd sworn not to even touch only hours before. They had spent a peaceful afternoon, so peaceful that for a few minutes John forgot that their family was on the brink of falling apart forever. He and Alanna had gone to purchase all the groceries Randy had listed and then come home to help the younger man cook dinner. It had been eaten to the tune of Alanna's stories as she filled Randy in on all she and John had done during their week together. They had retreated up to the bedroom after cleaning up and baths to watch a movie and somewhere along the lines of Dorothy's adventures in Oz, both Alanna and Randy had fallen asleep besides John.

John stopped the DVD as the credits began to roll and turned to look at his daughter. He smiled and lifted her into his arms as gently as he could. Quietly walking out of the room, John walked to Alanna's bedroom only a few feet away from the one he shared, or used to, with Randy. He quickly settled her into her bed, the small girl barely stirring as John wrapped the covers around her and placed a kiss on her head.

Slowly trudging back towards his room, exhaustion beginning to creep in, John froze at the doorway as he saw Randy still sleeping soundly in the large bed. Unsure of what to do, he walked over to the bed and climbed on, turning to face Randy's body. The younger man was sleeping soundly, his expression peaceful. John hated to disturb him but knew if Randy awoke in the bed any later, he would be livid.

"Ran? Randy, wake up."

Randy didn't stir at John's soft call. John groaned softly and reached a hand forward, gently shaking Randy's shoulder as he tried again. "Randy, wake up."

Randy sighed in his sleep, shifting slightly but not waking. John sighed as he rested his hand on Randy's shoulder, shaking him once more, aware of how difficult he would be to wake up. "Ran, come on, baby,"

The endearment slipped out before John could stop it and he froze his motions in case Randy had heard. Randy turned over, changing positions and effectively sliding closer to John's touch. John remained still, enjoying the feeling of Randy's skin on his hand after so many months.

"Johnny,"

Randy's soft mumble of his name snapped John out of his daze and he shook his head, uncomfortable now with the closeness of the men. He resumed shaking Randy's shoulder and, finally, after a few more shakes, Randy's brow furrowed and he frowned as he slowly awoke. His eyes connected with John's, widening slightly. "What's going on?"

"You fell asleep during the movie. I just took Ally to bed and figured you would want to go too..." John shrugged. "I mean, if you want to stay here, I don't care but I know you probably don't so I figured I would wake you up so you don't get mad at me if you wake up on your own..."

"Jesus, shut up," interrupted Randy, laughing softly. "You're making my head hurt."

John smiled but it was clearly full of sadness. "Sorry. I just don't know how to be around you or even talk to you lately. I don't know how you're gonna react. It's like you've become someone I don't even know any more."

Randy's smile faded and his eyes lowered. "I know. Trust me, the feeling is mutual and it stinks just as much over here." He pulled his body up and sat in the bed, resting his head on the headboard. "We're gonna need help trying to figure this stuff out, John."

"I called Nancy this morning and got her recommendations on a couple of doctors that specialize in marriage counseling. I didn't think we would be able to work this out on our own, either." John shrugged. "I'll let you read over the list and pick your favorite."

Randy nodded, agreeing that calling his former anger management counselor would be the best way to find the best doctor to help them. He swung his legs over the side of the bed and stretched his arms over his head before standing up. "OK, I'll go over it tomorrow. I'm too exhausted to do anything but get some more sleep right now."

"Yeah, of course. Get some rest and we'll talk tomorrow." John smiled over at Randy from the bed, lowering his body into the bed. "Sure you don't wanna stay here? I won't talk any more."

Randy rolled his eyes and shook his head. "No, thanks, funnyman." He turned and walked to the door slowly.

"Randy,"

Randy stopped at John's soft call of his name. He was only a few steps from the outside but turned around to meet John's intense gaze. "Yeah,"

"Is it terrible that despite what you did and how angry I still am at you, that I still want you so bad?"

Randy inhaled sharply at John's softly spoken question. He moved his gaze to the floor as he licked his suddenly dry lips, contemplating how to respond. Figuring honesty was the best policy, Randy shook his head and looked back up, locking eyes with John. "No, it's not terrible because despite what you did and how angry I am at you, I still want you just as badly. Unfortunately, we both know that it can't happen."

John nodded from where he lay on the bed. "I know." He sighed but then slowly smiled. "Good night, Ran."

"Good night, John," Randy smiled back and turned away, walking towards his new room, anxiously looking forward to the next day. Getting a doctor to help him and John work out their problems was sounding like a better idea with every passing minute.

**A/N: Review, please! In the next chapter we find out who John cheated with but I give a hint in this chapter...**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: I love your reviews and they really make me want to update quickly for you all! You have amazing powers! **

_Months earlier…_

_"Are you sure you should be here, Ran? I mean, you and John aren't exactly in a good place and he came here to get away from you. You really think you should just show up without telling him?"_

_Randy rolled his eyes at Ted's worried round of questioning. "This is still my house as much as it is his. I have every right to be here, Ted." He sighed softly, trying to keep his anger in check and not alienate the only friend he had left. "I can't stand this separation anymore. John and I have to deal with what happened and soon. We have a kid who doesn't understand why he hasn't been home in over 2 weeks!"_

_Ted nodded, tilting his head slightly. "I agree; you two do need to sit and figure things out. I just don't think you should ambush him like this, Ran. You're gonna alienate him more and you're damn sure gonna piss him off more if you go in there demanding things from him."_

_Randy remained silent, Ted's words swimming in his head. He looked up at his beautiful Tampa home that he'd shared with John for years now; the home the older man had retreated to after Randy's night with Cody. It had been almost 3 weeks and John had barely spoken a word to him since that night. He called every night and spoke to Alanna, telling her he was away filming a movie and that he would see her soon. Besides the phrase, "Put Alanna on the phone." Randy hadn't heard his voice. At work, the need to speak wasn't necessary since they weren't in a program with each other so John made sure to steer clear of him there. Randy knew better than to approach him in front of their co-workers. John had made it clear from the first day they met; he hated being involved in any type of gossip among their workplace. People had already noticed the change in attitude between the two men but no one dared approach them. They all had approached Cody, though, after the young man had shown up to the next city with a black eye and taped ribs. Randy had heard from Ted, the only man he'd trusted enough to tell the truth, that Cody had made up a story of being mugged. It was obvious he had been told to keep his mouth shut by John._

_"I'm not gonna go in demanding anything. I just want to talk to him and I want him to listen." Randy lowered his gaze down to his hand, his wedding ring staring back up at him. "I miss him and I need him to forgive me. I can't lose John. I've never wanted anyone but him and I never will. I need to fix this."_

_Ted patted Randy's shoulder gently. "Then go in there and fight for him. Just make sure you listen to him, too, Ran. You know he's hurting real bad right now."_

_Randy looked up, a small smile on his face and nodded. "Thanks, Teddy. Thanks for the ride, too. I'll talk to you tomorrow."_

_Ted nodded and watched as Randy stepped out of the car, his suitcase being dragged behind him as he walked up the path to the front door. Randy turned and watched Ted drive away before turning back to open the front door. Quickly shutting off the beeping alarm system, Randy dropped the suitcase in the foyer and proceeded forward into the dark home._

_Randy frowned as he walked through his dark living room. He knew John was home because his car was parked outside in their driveway. It was odd the house was dark, though. John hated being alone in their home and usually left lights on in every room to make him feel less so. As he walked up the stairs to their second landing, some lights soon became visible. Randy breathed a sigh of relief as he heard some noise, as well, happy that indeed John was in the house and awake. He continued on down the hallway and slowly approached his and John's closed bedroom door, the muffled noises increasing with each footstep. Randy placed his hand on the doorknob, turning it slowly and entering the room. He frowned as his eyes only hit more darkness and blindly reached for the light switch on the wall._

_After flipping the switch, the bedroom flooded with light and Randy turned over, his eyes going to the bed. A loud gasp escaped Randy's lips as his eyes landed on not only the bed but the two men entwined together on it._

_"John!"_

_The muffled noises, which now sounded like exactly like the moans and pants of pleasure they were, suddenly stopped and John jumped up in the bed, his widened blue eyes swinging over to meet Randy's horrified gaze. "Randy! What the hell are you doing here?"_

_Randy's mouth hung open and he stood frozen to his spot at the entryway of the room. "What the hell am I doing here? What the hell are you doing…in our bed?"_

_John shook his head, unsure of how to answer and turned his head back down to his bed partner, who had begun to move away. "I'm sorry but can you…"_

_Randy watched as Dwayne Johnson, a man John claimed to dislike more than anyone else he'd ever met, climbed out of his bed and scrambled around the floor looking for his clothes. He shook his head and found his legs were suddenly able to move and they started carrying him closer. "Are you fucking kidding me? You're cheating on me with this asshole after all the shit you both talked about each other? Is this a fucking joke?"_

_John held up a hand and shook his head. "Randy, don't."_

_Randy narrowed his eyes and glared at John and at the man trying to make a quick getaway. "Don't what? I shouldn't be confused by what you and this asshole are doing…and I'll repeat, in my fucking bed!"_

_John climbed off the bed, sliding on some boxer shorts as he did. "You're not even supposed to be here, Randy."_

_"Oh, that's right, I forgot. I'm not supposed to be here. Please, then, go ahead and finish!" Randy rolled his eyes before turning around and leaving the room, the door slamming behind him. He practically ran down the hall and into the guest room, closing the door behind him and locking himself in. As he desperately tried to catch his breath and remove the image of John and Dwayne together from his head, the floodgates suddenly opened and the control he had held onto while in the presence of the two men crumbled. Randy slumped to the floor, his head on his knees as his eyes overflowed with tears._

* * *

A hard thump on his chest jolted Randy up in bed and he groaned loudly as his eyes opened to see Alanna sitting on his chest. "Al, can't you think of a nicer way to wake me up?"

Alanna shook her head, a frown on her face. "Why are you sleeping in this room?"

Randy's eyes widened and he pulled his body into a sitting position, trying to think of an excuse. Before he could answer, John appeared in the doorway of the bedroom and leaned against the open door. "Because I was cleaning up in our room and Daddy was still sleepy. So, he came in here so he could sleep a little more."

"Oh, OK." Alanna scrambled off Randy's chest and the bed, running out of the room past John. The older man smiled at her as she ran past before turning his gaze over to Randy. "Al and I ran to the bakery and we got some breakfast. It's still warm so maybe you should head down…"

Randy nodded and slid out of bed, rubbing his eyes. "Yeah, I'll be right down. Let me just clean up."

John nodded and walked away, closing the door and leaving Randy on his own in the room. Randy watched him go, staring at the closed door for a few seconds before standing up and going about his morning activities.

Close to an hour later he joined John and Alanna in the kitchen where the pair were scanning John's iPad together. Randy served himself a cup of coffee and walked around to where Alanna stood on a chair, wrapping an arm around her and hugging her tightly. "Good morning, baby. Thank you for getting me out of bed."

Alanna turned and returned Randy's hug just as fiercely. "Daddy and I want to go to the zoo today. There's a new baby panda! Can we go?"

Randy smiled and nodded. "Of course we can go, baby. I'm dressed and ready to go now if you are."

Alanna quickly shook her head and looked down at her comfortable outfit. "Uh, not yet. I want to wear another shirt." She scrambled off the chair and ran out of the kitchen towards the stairs before even finishing off her sentence. Randy watched her leave with a smile, shaking his head. "When will this concern for her appearance stop?"

"Who knows? Like father like daughter, right?" replied John with a smirk. He reached for Randy's empty coffee cup and watched as the younger man rolled his eyes, a small smile on his face. "True. She's exactly like you."

John laughed loudly and shook his head. "I may have infused Ally with many things but the honor of being concerned with her looks comes from the Orton gene, love."

Randy's smile slowly faded at the endearment coming from John's lips and he lowered his gaze. He could feel John's piercing gaze still on him and couldn't bring himself up to meet it.

"I'm sorry. I don't know why I said that…it just slipped…." John stopped and sighed loudly, unsure of how to continue.

"It's OK. I'm not gonna get mad." responded Randy quickly. "It's weird but...it doesn't make me angrier. It doesn't make me feel anything except surprise because I've actually missed hearing it..." His voice dropped to barely above a whisper as he spoke and he could feel his face grow hotter as he blushed. An embarrassed laugh escaped his lips and he finally looked up into John's eyes. "When does therapy start again? I think we need it ASAP."

John also laughed softly and nodded. "I know you haven't read the list of therapists Nancy sent us but she put her favorite on the top and I called him and he has room this afternoon. Should we try him and see if we all click?"

"Sure, sounds good." Randy motioned upstairs and sighed. "I'd better go see what's taking our darling daughter so long. The process of picking a shirt could take hours, as you know." He turned and walked out of the kitchen but stopped after only a few steps and faced John once more. "It's gotta be a good sign, right?"

John frowned and looked back at him. "What?"

"The fact that we're slipping back into an old routine and slowly starting to get back to normal. I mean, this morning almost felt like the old mornings we would spend here. It's gotta be a good sign that maybe we can fix things. Not right away but slowly," Randy shrugged and shook his head. "I don't know. Maybe it's nothing."

"No, I agree. I think it is a good sign." John moved around the counter and took a couple of steps towards Randy until they were only a few feet away. "I have faith that we're gonna be able to fix things, Ran. There's still something between us. It's hard to see it right now with how awkward things are but I believe we can make things right again and get back to how we were." He lowered his tone and stared deeply into Randy's eyes, the younger man having frozen in front of him. "Randy, I still love you."

Randy inhaled sharply at John's admission, a declaration that had caused him countless nights of doubt and agony over the past months. His mind swirled with questions he wanted to ask John, the first being how he could still claim to love him but he chose to go with his heart and say the only thing that really mattered. "I still love you, too, John."

The older man nodded and smiled. "Well, I think that's the best sign of all that we can make this work."

**A/N: OK, so know you all know who John cheated with. I thought it would be sweet to make him cheat with Rocky because he would be so unexpected. No one would expect Rock to submit to John but in my head that badass will submit to the badass that Cena is. The hint from the chapter before was when Randy told John, "It doesn't matter." Don't know how many of you got it so you tell me, LOL! In the upcoming chapters we'll see how John and Dwayne ended up in that bed as they boys start therapy. Thanks for the love this story is getting, guys! XOXO**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Update Time! **

"Where the hell is this doctor? Don't we have an appointment?" Randy growled angrily as he paced around the spacious therapist office. John looked at him out of the corner of his eye before lowering his gaze to his wristwatch. "Calm down. He's only like 5 minutes late. We do have an appointment but it's one he gave us as a favor so we cant complain if he's running a few minutes late, Randy. Just be patient for once in your life."

Randy glared at John momentarily before looking away. "I don't like the idea of Al being in a hospital day care with strangers, John."

"Randy, she'll be fine. She ran in and was fine as soon as she saw the other children and all they toys. It's only for an hour or so." John sighed and leaned back on the sofa, his eyes closing as he rested his head on a cushion and stretched out. "You're exhausting me. Please stop,"

"I apologize for exhausting the all-mighty John Cena,"

Even without opening his eyes John could see the eye roll and smirk that accompanied Randy's sarcastic remark. His lips curved into a smile and he sat up in the sofa. "Will you just sit down? You're driving yourself crazy."

Randy sighed and slowly walked over to the large sofa. He took a seat on the far end, away from where John sat sprawled out and focused his attention on the phone he pulled out of his pants. John watched him, an amused smile on his face. "Do you wanna talk before the doc gets here?"

Randy looked up, a confused frown on his face. "I thought we were supposed to talk when the doc was here…"

John shrugged. "I'm trying to calm you down. You're pacing and I know you only do that when you get nervous."

"I'm fine." responded Randy quickly. "I'm not nervous."

John rolled his eyes. "Oh, come on, Ran. I've known you for 10 years. You pace when you get nervous. After you get tired of pacing you'll start biting your nails and…"

"John, stop!" Randy's voice echoed through the quiet room and John's eyes widened in surprise. "Stop telling me how much you know me. Things have changed and you don't know me anymore. Get that through your head, will you?"

John held up his hands in surrender and nodded. "Fine. Let's just sit quietly until the doctor gets here, then."

Randy turned away, his gaze going back to his phone screen. John moved his gaze around the room, his eyes landing on the many degrees the doctor had on his wall. He studied them carefully while Randy's fingers tapped away on his phone, the only noise in the room.

Finally, the door to the room opened and an older man walked in. He smiled over at Randy and John and approached the couch, his hand out in a greeting.

"Hello, boys. I'm Dr. Adams. I understand Nancy recommended you,"

Randy nodded and shook Dr. Adams' hand. "Yes, I'm a former patient of hers. I had some anger issues,"

Dr. Adams took a seat across from the sofa and nodded, looking down at the paper on his lap. "Then, you must be Randy." He turned his gaze over to John. "And you're John,"

John nodded. "Yeah. It's nice to meet you."

"It's nice to meet you, too; both of you. I hope this will be a place where you two can work out whatever issues are plaguing your relationship." Dr. Adams leaned back in his seat. "So, tell me, what brings you here?"

Randy took a deep breath and turned towards John, the reaction so automatic for him when asked something that made him uncomfortable. The older man smiled slowly and shrugged. "I guess we're having problems with trust because we were both unfaithful."

Dr. Adams nodded and looked at Randy. "Would you agree, Randy?"

Randy nodded. "I guess,"

"Let's start at the beginning. Tell me how long you've known each other and when it became intimate." Dr. Adams focused on Randy, who gulped nervously before answering. "We've known each other for a little over 10 years. We met at work and became friends. It became more about 5 years later when we dated a bit. I married someone else but it didn't work and then John and I got married 3 years ago."

"So, you and John were involved but you married someone else?" Dr. Adams frowned and Randy quickly shook his head. "No, we only dated a bit but it didn't go far. He didn't want to…"

"It's not that I didn't want to, Randy," interrupted John, anger creeping into his voice. "Tell the truth. You were a junkie who didn't want to get better and on the verge of tanking his career and I wasn't going to let you drag me down, too."

Randy sighed and held his hand up, meeting John's glare. "Fine, my mistake. I'm not trying to lie, John." He turned over to the doctor, who watched silently. "I had a drug problem but I swore I didn't. John made it clear I either get help or he was gone from my life, both as friend and as potential boyfriend or whatever the hell we were becoming at the time. I let him go. I met this girl who I thought I loved and we got married in less than a year. We had a baby a year later but I still couldn't kick my habit. One day she came home and found me unconscious on the floor of our house. She got me to a hospital and saved my life but served me with divorce papers the next day. I don't blame her. Things had changed. We had a kid now so…" Randy stopped and shook his head.

Dr. Adams nodded. "John, how did you come back into the picture?"

John sighed, annoyed at having to explain some of the worst memories of his and Randy's beginnings. "He was suspended from work for 3 months after they found out he almost overdosed. He checked himself into rehab for those 3 months and for the first month I got a daily call from him telling me how horrible a friend I was to him and how much he hated me. I figured it was the withdrawal talking and I paid him no mind. After the month, he called me and finally started sounding normal. He apologized for the other calls and asked me to come see him. I wanted to but I said no. It wasn't until the last week that I went. I realized how much he had changed in those 3 months. He was back to the way he was when I first met him. I agreed we would try to slowly work on our friendship again. It just grew from there, I guess."

"Randy, was that the end of your drug use?" Dr. Adams turned his gaze back to Randy, who nodded.

"Yes, until a few months ago. I'm back at meetings now."

"What made you relapse?"

Randy quickly shook his head at the doctor's question. "I didn't! I mean, I did but I didn't take anything of my own choosing. I would never have taken anything willingly. I'm not that person anymore and I don't ever want to be. I was given something…a cigarette. It had coke in it and I didn't know."

Dr. Adams frowned. "Oh my. How did this happen?"

"A friend; a former friend, I should say. He thought I needed to loosen up and took it upon himself to help me." Randy rolled his eyes and looked away.

Dr. Adams turned to John when he noticed Randy's tension. "John, what do you know about this?"

"Only what Randy has told me. He didn't know the cigarette had anything. That the guy told him after he finished it," John shrugged. "That's about it."

Dr. Adams raised an eyebrow. "Do you believe him?"

John took a deep breath before responding, the silence dragging on for what felt like an eternity. He could feel Randy's glare on him and he finally answered. "It took me awhile but yeah, I do. He would never have given up all those years of being clean for one night."

"But you had doubts?" asked Dr. Adams.

John shrugged once more. "I guess…I mean, wouldn't anyone? Randy was a hardcore drug abuser and I will always worry that something is going to tempt him. I know he will try his damndest to fight it but I will always worry that one day he just won't be strong enough."

Dr. Adams nodded. "OK, let's get to the infidelity. How and when?"

Both Randy and John remained silent, neither willing to go first. Randy finally cleared his throat and mumbled, "That night. That same night I got high, I cheated on him with a friend. I barely remember it but I remember enough to know I did it. I confessed it the next day."

"And John?"

John lowered his eyes, his face covered in a flush. "A few weeks later. I was having dinner with a co-worker and we had a few drinks. I told him about the problems Randy and I were having and we somehow ended up in bed together."

"In our bed together," added Randy, his foot tapping angrily on the floor. "I actually walked in on them, Doc."

"That's not necessary, Randy," started John but Dr. Adams quickly interrupted. "OK, one at a time." He turned towards John and leaned forward. "Why did you cheat on Randy, John? Did you not believe the story he told you of how he happened to cheat?"

John shook his head. "I don't know,"

Dr. Adams smiled. "Yes, you do, John. These things always have a reason."

"I guess not this time. I was a little drunk…" John began but Randy loud sigh stopped him. "Just admit it, John. You thought I got high on purpose and fucked Cody on purpose and you wanted to get even with me. You probably didn't expect me to walk in on you but hey, it was the perfect accident. Unless it really wasn't and you knew I was on my way home and you planned the whole thing just right…"

"Shut the fuck up, Randy." John stood up off the sofa, his yell bouncing off the walls. "You know the real fucking reason this all happened! This all started the minute your little friend came back. You went crazy with him like you used to when we were all kids and you completely forgot your promise to me and your daughter and the commitment we made to be a family. You wanted to act like a man with no responsibilities and that's why you were at that bar that night with Brock and why he was able to give you those drugs! You made it so fucking easy for him. All of this shit could've been avoided if you would've just listened to me when I told you I was worried about how you were changing and telling you how I didn't like or trust Brock! All of this could've been avoided if you had been home with your family that night instead of acting like a kid in a bar!"

John turned his furious gaze onto the therapist. "You wanna know what this all boils down to for me, Doc? Randy didn't trust me. He fucked up after promising he would never do this again and I don't know if I can ever forgive him. Every time I think I can, I remember that night where he chose his friends over his family. He broke us so I wanted to pay him back and I fucked another guy. I actually didn't expect him home that night but I gotta admit it made me feel so fucking good to see the look on his face. It probably looked exactly like mine looked when he told me he not only got high but that he fucked Cody." He shook his head and turned away, heading for the door. "I don't think this is gonna work."

Randy stared at John as he walked out of the office, the door slamming behind him. His eyes lowered to his hands that gripped his knees tightly, his knuckles white. After taking a deep breath, he stood and locked eyes with Dr. Adams. "Sorry to have wasted your time but I agree. This isn't going to work."

**A/N: REVIEW!**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Thank you so much for all your reviews! I love them so much! They make me want to keep writing! **

Randy tuned out the sound of his daughter's voice, his eyes focused on the passing cars and people he saw as John drove them all home. There was nothing more he wanted than to get home so he could lock himself into his bedroom and completely fall apart. It was only for his daughter sake that he held it back but his anger towards John was threatening to boil over with every passing second. He'd had no choice but to get in the car with him after picking up Alanna from the hospital day care. A diversion from that would've bought about far too many questions from his daughter; questions he didn't want to nor was he prepared to answer.

"Daddy, are you listening to me?"

Randy snapped back to the present and turned around in his seat. He smiled at Alanna and nodded. "I'm trying to, baby but I have a little headache. I don't really feel well."

Alanna frowned. "Is that why Daddy John took you to the doctor?"

Randy's smile wavered at the sound of John's name but he tried to hold it steady. "No, but that doesn't matter. Let's just think about all the fun we're gonna have at the zoo, OK."

Alanna nodded happily and turned her attention back to the book in her lap, contented by Randy's answer. Randy turned over, letting out a small sigh of relief when she didn't press the issue and closed his eyes as he rested his head on the seat.

"I can take Al alone if you really don't feel well. Do you want me to drop you off?"

Randy's eyes slowly opened at the sound of John's softly spoken question. He turned towards him, his eyes widening in disbelief. "Are you serious right now? What in the world makes you think I want to speak to you at this moment?"

John rolled his eyes and turned back to the road. "I was just asking. It's called trying to be nice. You should try it sometime."

"Just shut your mouth and drive, John. The urge to slam your head into that window is liable to overwhelm me if you keep talking." Randy kept his voice low but his tone was clear. He closed his eyes once more, obviously done with the conversation. He could hear John's exasperated sigh from where he sat in the driver's seat and ignored it, instead willing the day to go by as quickly as possible.

* * *

It was hours later when Randy was able to get his wish of being able to disappear into his bedroom and he did so within seconds of kissing Alanna good night. He closed the bedroom door behind him and peeled off his clothes, heading directly into the bathroom to get the zoo smell off him.

Once under the hot spray of the shower, Randy finally felt his body begin to relax. It had been in a state of tension from the moment John had stood up from that couch in the therapist's office. He had known the older man would explode at one point during the therapy. He just hadn't known it would be on the first day or that the look of hatred still shooting from John's eyes would affect him as much as it had. John's explosion had left him numb and bought back old doubts and fears that had long since left Randy.

Randy rested his head on the tile of the shower and tried to push away the thoughts in his head. He could already feel his eyes watering as John's words replayed themselves in a constant loop. Angrily, wiping his eyes, Randy stood up off the wall and finished washing off. He wouldn't allow his mind to be played with, not even by John. He would have to learn to move on and he would have to admit to himself and to everyone that there was no hope left for him and John.

Randy quickly dried himself off and slipped into some pajama bottoms. He threw the dirty clothes he'd taken off into the hamper and slowly walked out of the steamy bathroom into the bedroom. A yawn escaped him as the exhaustion of the day started creeping in but as quickly as it came, it left. Randy's eyes widened when he saw John sprawled on his bed, aiming the remote control at his television.

"What the hell are you doing in here?"

John slowly turned the television off and lowered the remote. He raised an eyebrow over at Randy. "Keep your voice down. Ally doesn't need to hear this."

Randy glared back at him. "Hear what? I don't want to hear anything from you either. I want you the fuck out of my room!"

John shrugged calmly and sat up. "Not gonna happen. We need to talk about what happened today, Ran. Too much went down for us to ignore it."

"I don't want to talk to you, John. Enough was said in front of the doc. I don't need to hear anymore from you." Randy rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest, feeling naked as he stood with no shirt on.

"Randy, a lot of hurtful stuff was said today…"

"Not by me," interrupted Randy with a soft mumble. John sighed but slowly nodded. "Fine, I said the most hurtful things."

John sighed and lowered his eyes. "Look, I was pissed and I just flipped out. I didn't know it was gonna happen and I didn't mean to do that there. There was a better way to handle that and I picked the worst possible way to handle it."

Randy stared at him silently for a few seconds before responding. "Fine. So, can you get out now?"

"Randy, I'm trying to talk to you here! I'm trying to be honest and explain to you what I feel! Why are you being such an asshole?" John stood up from the bed, the exasperation evident in his voice.

Randy's eyes widened and his hands dropped to his sides, clenching into fists. "I'm being an asshole? Are you kidding me? You blamed everything on me at that damn therapy session today and refused to take any responsibility! I get it; I made a mistake, John! One of my oldest friends came back and I lost myself for a minute there. It was fun to pretend I was a 20 year old kid, hanging out with the boys and who had no responsibilities, even if just for a couple of hours. I never planned on getting high that night and cheating on you, though and you seem to believe I did! You seem to think I was bored with our life and wanted to purposely do something to fuck it up when that's the last thing I was. I love our life; I love you and Al more than anything and I would never have willingly done anything to push you guys away. I made a mistake. I should've been home that night with you and Al but I never knew Brock was gonna give me anything and that Cody would…" Randy shook his head as his throat clogged with emotion. He swallowed it down and shrugged. "I took responsibility for it and I admitted what I did immediately to you. I apologized, I cried, I begged you to forgive me. I can't do anything else, John. You've made up your mind and you've already decided I'm to blame for it all so I guess that's the answer. This isn't going to work."

John walked over to Randy slowly, standing a few feet away from him. "Don't say that. I don't think you're to blame. I just said it because I was angry. The minute Brock came back, I just felt you pulling away. You didn't want to listen to me and you stopped talking to me…I was so sure I was gonna lose you and then when that night happened, I saw it all as proof that what I had been feeling those weeks before was real."

"I don't know why you thought that, John. I would never choose you over any friend and if I was, I didn't realize it. We went to sleep together every night and woke up together every morning…I didn't see a problem." Randy shrugged and lowered his gaze to the ground. "When you talked to me about Brock, you sounded so judgmental and it surprised me. You don't judge people and it was one of the main reasons I was drawn to you when we first met. Your feelings towards Brock, though, you couldn't hide how much you hated him and thought he was still the same man from 8 years earlier. I didn't understand. You saw me change so much but you didn't seem to believe Brock could change his ways, too. I wanted to find a way to prove he had but you didn't even want to try to get to know him after so many years. It made me mad but I never once stopped loving you over it."

John's eyes watered at the softness he could hear emerging from Randy's voice, a sound he hadn't heard in months. "I knew the minute I saw him that he hadn't changed; that he was a man incapable of change. I wanted to protect you from him and his influence and in the end, I still couldn't."

"No one could've. I couldn't even protect myself. I convinced myself that he was better and he was my friend and I got fucked over by it," Randy rolled his eyes. "Then, that other little shit Cody. Messing with him was worse than getting high after all those years. I could get clean again but his betrayal was something that could never go away."

"I know how much he hurt you. I made him pay real good for that one." John smiled as the memory of his altercation with Cody came to his mind. His smile wavered as he took a step closer to Randy and reached for his hands. Randy tensed at the feel of John so close to him but didn't pull away.

"Ran, I'm sorry I went crazy at the doctor's office. I may have blamed you at one point, but I don't anymore. I was just angry and thought it was your fault because you chose to stay at that bar that night. I realize now that if Brock wanted to fuck with you, he would've found a way. Whether you had come home with me that night or not," John looked away, unable to bear Randy's intense gaze any longer. "I'm embarrassed that I did what I did to get revenge on you. There was no need for it and I'm sorry I ever did it. "

"No, there wasn't but," whispered Randy. "I know you regret it, John."

John looked back up, nodding quickly. "I regret it so much. I never would've wanted to hurt you as badly as I did. I love you so much, Ran; so, so much." He leaned forward slightly, pressing his body as close to Randy's as he could. Randy's eyes widened slightly as John released his hands and wrapped them around his bare hips. John moved his head closer, letting his lips hover over Randy's, their breaths mingling. Just as he made the final move to join their lips, Randy turned away, giving John his cheek instead. John frowned and pulled back, removing his hands from Randy's body. "What?"

Randy shook his head and quickly took a couple of steps back, away from where John stood. "I can't. I'm sorry, but I just can't. I can't stop picturing you in bed with him and I just can't."

John sighed but nodded. "Oh, I understand." He turned to head out of the room but Randy quickly walked back over to him and grabbed his arm. "John, I love you. I love you so much and I want to kiss you and touch you and do all the other things that leads to. I will always look at you and want you but every time I try right now, I remember him and I can't. Give me time, please."

John turned around and frowned. "Why don't I need time? Why can I see you and still want you despite you and Cody doing the same thing Dwayne and I did?"

Randy sighed and released John's arm. "Because you're finally realizing that the circumstance are very different between both situations, John. I didn't willingly sleep with Cody but you did with Dwayne."

"I guess so, right?" John lowered his head. "I want to fix us, Ran. Tell me what I can do. Maybe we can try this therapy thing again?"

Randy smiled and nodded. "I would like that. I want to fix this, too."

John smiled back and headed for the door once more. "Goodnight, Ran."

Randy watched him walk the few feet towards the bedroom door for only a few seconds before his feet carried him in the same direction. "Wait, John…"

John stopped halfway out the door and turned, coming face to face with Randy, who enveloped him in his arms. John smiled as he buried his face in Randy's bare shoulder, relishing the smell and feel of his husband's skin. It was over too soon but he maintained the smile as Randy pulled back. The younger man lifted his index finger to his lip and kissed it before pressing it onto John's lips lightly. "Goodnight, Johnny."

**A/N: Review!**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Summer break rules! **

Dr. Adams slid into the room, a pleased smile on his face. "Well, boys, I am happy to see you here. I must admit, I didn't expect you to come back."

John smiled back from where he sat beside Randy. "We talked and agreed that our relationship is worth saving. We know there are going to be arguments along the way as we try to work things out but..." He stopped and shrugged. "We're willing to fight through it."

Dr. Adams nodded. "Well, lets get this started today with something a bit easier than what we discussed in our last session." He turned to Randy and opened the file on his lap. "Randy, lets talk about you. How would you describe your first marriage?"

"My marriage to Sam?" Randy sighed softly. "I don't know how to describe it except as a mistake. I didn't want her. She was a nice girl, though and smart and pretty and I did like her and I grew to love her but I didn't fall in love with her. That marriage started and ended before I had a chance to barely blink so..." He stopped and looked over at John before continuing. "She was never the one I wanted for the rest of my life."

Dr. Adams frowned. "So why marry her at all?"

"Because I was sick of coming home to nothing and sick of being alone. All my friends had left me and even my family was avoiding me." responded Randy with no emotion. He quickly held up a hand before the doctor could question him again. "Sam knew all of this, though. I never lied to her and told her she was my great love or anything. She understood and accepted that and our weird relationship for her own reasons."

"What were those?" asked Dr. Adams. Randy shook his head. "I don't know and I never asked. I always assumed she wanted to get away from her parents and that she enjoyed my last name. She knew it would get her places. All in all, though, I think we both agree the daughter we got out of our marriage was worth the mistake."

Dr. Adams nodded. "Let's switch topics. How would you describe your relationship with John? All of it, not just romantically."

Randy smiled before he realized it. He looked over at John once more, his smile widening when he saw the older man's lips also curved. "My relationship with John is...weird."

John laughed loudly and shook his head. "Isn't that what every husband wants to hear?"

"No, I don't mean it in a bad way!" Randy rolled his eyes playfully at John. "We're weird, Johnny. We barely have anything in common, we come from completely different backgrounds with families and our attitudes couldn't be any more different..."

"Elaborate, Randy." Dr. Adams leaned forward, pleased by the warmth he saw developing between Randy and John.

Randy sighed and looked deep in thought. "John and I became friends really quickly but it wasn't because we had things in common. The only thing we had in common was our love for the business. Despite that, we would spend hours just talking about everything...families, hometowns, other friends, dreams, goals..." He shrugged. "Everyone found it weird; including us."

Dr. Adams smiled. "Clear case of opposites attracting."

"I guess so." Randy turned back over to John, meeting his intense gaze. "We stopped worrying about it after awhile and just enjoyed this amazing friendship we were building."

"Tell me about when it became romantic." said Dr. Adams.

Randy looked back over at the doctor, frowning as he tried to remember some of his and John's earliest moments. "It was about 5 years later. We had been through so many ups and downs in our career; so many injuries and betrayals from people we considered friends but through it all, we remained so tight. People probably thought we were dating years before we actually did, right John?"

John nodded, smiling at Randy's question. "There's no doubt. They did. I had to deal with many comments back then."

"How was it moving from friendship to something more?" asked Dr. Adams.

"Not as weird as you would think it was. I already loved him so it wasn't hard to think of that love growing into something more." Randy sat back on the sofa, turning his body towards John. "How was it for you?"

"It was long overdue. You know I wanted you long before you gave in to my advances." John winked over at Randy, who rolled his eyes. "Don't start, John."

"Is that true?" Dr. Adams raised an eyebrow. "Did you want to become more earlier in your friendship?"

"No, he didn't. It was just teasing..." started Randy but he was quickly interrupted.

"Randy, you know it wasn't teasing. You knew from day one but you pretended not to." John shook his head. "I never pressed the issue but I knew you knew I wasn't joking."

Randy turned his body away and lowered his head slightly, remaining silent. He heard John sigh but ignored him.

"Randy, what are you thinking?"

Randy looked up at Dr. Adams' question. He shrugged and shook his head simultaneously. "I don't know."

Dr. Adams laughed. "How can you not know, Randy? This is a safe space, Randy. You can open up here."

"He's not a fan of opening up. I still have to drag things out of him, Doc." John smirked over at Randy, who looked back over at him with a glare.

"Just because I don't tweet everything, John, doesn't mean I can't open up." Randy smirked back over at John, who quickly laughed.

"Then, answer the question. What are you thinking?"

Randy's face quickly sobered and he sighed. "Fine. I'm thinking about how stupid I was back then. I knew what you wanted from me but I just couldn't give it to you. I was scared to lose you."

John slowly smiled. "Then, why did you give in a year later when I asked you out? I did it the exact same way."

Randy shrugged. "Who knows? You must've caught me on a good day. I decided to just go for it and see what your moves were."

John's smile widened. "You found out pretty quick how good they were. Couldn't get you off me after that first date."

"Fuck off," Randy rolled his eyes and turned back to the doctor, who watched them, clearly amused. "He wasn't horrible so I decided to give him another date which turned into a third and a fourth and continued on for over a year."

Dr. Adams nodded. "What did you like most about John, the boyfriend?"

"He was still the same John as John, the best friend but..." Randy looked over at John and frowned. "He became more protective, more affectionate, I guess. All of the sudden, I was talking about things I hadn't before and I was showing a little more emotion and he was doing the same. He wasn't this perfect guy like I thought he was. He had fears and doubts like I did and I just wanted to be there for him and show him how much I loved him despite it all; that I didn't care and I loved him more for being imperfect..." He trailed off, unsure of how to continue.

"John, what about you? What did you like most about Randy when you finally became intimate?" Dr. Adams turned his gaze over to John.

"We had been friends for years and we shared so much during that friendship but I always knew Randy held somethings back. He didn't mean to and he did it without even realizing he was doing it. He's just a naturally guarded person. I never minded it because I knew that he knew if he ever needed me for anything, I would be there." John stopped when he felt a hand land upon where his lay on the sofa. He looked down at Randy's hand, subconsciously stroking the wedding band John wore on his finger. "When we started dating, though, he opened up more. He talked to me more in detail about his childhood, his feelings...it was so amazing to me. It was like getting to know him all over again but for real this time. I couldn't believe someone so beautiful, smart and talented had doubts about so much. I fell so hard. I loved him so much and just wanted to show him."

"OK," Dr. Adams smiled hesitantly. "How did it go from that to Randy marrying someone else?"

John sighed and felt Randy's fingers stop moving over his skin. The younger man pulled away and lifted his head, facing the doctor. "I started messing around with drugs. It started off slow and I told John it wasn't a big deal. I made sure to take it easy when he was around but not when I went home on my own. It started to get worse. I needed more and more to get the same effect and he noticed; everyone noticed. He asked to stop and I did but it didn't last long. He made it clear that I had to make a choice. I chose drugs. That was the end of our relationship and our friendship. I met Sam a few months later in a club and it just went on from there. She didn't care about what I was doing as long as I didn't go crazy in front of her. That changed when she found out she was pregnant. I got better for awhile there but once our daughter was born and a few months old, I had to hit the road again. It wasn't long until I was back to the same thing."

Dr. Adams nodded and looked at John. "How was all of that for you, John?"

"Like a fucking bomb went off," John rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Excuse my language but imagine my surprise. Randy was the guy I thought I would be with forever. I thought he would come to his senses and get clean and come back to me, the one person in his life who loved him like he'd never been loved. After we broke up, I let him be. I thought if he found himself alone, he would realize that wasn't what he wanted for the rest of his life and he would fight to get better. I thought he would realize that I wasn't judging him for his mistakes and I never really wanted to let him go; I just wanted him to realize he was so much better than the stupid decisions he was making. I never expected him to find some stupid girl who would accept him continuing to hurt himself and that he would marry her! I was so angry when I found out and I thought for sure at that moment that I had lost him forever."

"How did you feel when he got better because his wife was expecting?" asked Dr. Adams.

"So happy. I didn't care why he got clean; I just cared that he did." John smiled and this time he reached for Randy's hand, happy to not have the younger man pull away. "After not talking for so many months, he finally told me he was gonna be a dad one day and I knew. I knew he would do anything for that baby. I was so happy for him and proud of him and I made sure to tell him everyday. He did so well for so long that I started to like Sam. I thought if I couldn't have him that at least someone who cared for him did have him. I mean, she may have started off horribly but she loved him and the life they created and she helped him a lot." His smile suddenly faded and his hand tightened around Randy's fingers without realizing it. "When he went back to drugs months after Ally was born, I thought for sure he would die one day from it. I mean, if that little girl didn't keep him clean forever, nothing would. The day his mom called me to tell me he was in the hospital from an OD was one of the worst days of my life. I was thankful he was OK but I knew it would only be a matter of time before he did it again. It was the first time in a long time that I didn't want him. I no longer cared who he was with or if he was clean or not. I just didn't want him anymore."

Randy's hand tensed in John's grip but the older man didn't let him go. He relaxed his hold and stared into Randy's eyes, begging him to understand.

"Randy, that overdose was the catalyst for you to finally enter a serious rehabilitation program, was it not?" asked Dr. Adams.

Randy nodded. "Yeah. Getting high suddenly didn't seem like so much fun after I woke up in a hospital bed with tubes coming out of my nose and charcoal all over my mouth. It also wasn't fun to see the looks of disappointment on everyone's face, especially my mother and it wasn't fun to be handed divorce papers while still in that hospital bed; divorce papers that made it clear Sam would sue me for sole custody of our daughter if I didn't meet her requirements for what a dad should be."

"While in rehab, John says you took out your frustrations on him."

Randy shrugged at Dr. Adams' statement. "I guess. I took my frustrations out on everyone, though. Everyone in my life got a call from me during withdrawal. I was pissed at the world."

"Why were you pissed at John specifically?" asked Dr. Adams, a small smile on his face.

Randy looked over at John, then down at their joined hands before answering. "Because I missed him and I needed him and I was scared and alone and he made things better for me when I felt that way but I didn't have him at that moment. I was angry at myself for letting him go and not working harder to get better when I had him and I didn't know how to tell him. I regretted marrying Sam and ruining our relationship and our friendship. I couldn't tell him how I felt because I didn't thing I stood a chance in getting him back and that just made me angrier."

Dr. Adams nodded and glanced at his watch. "Very good. Let's stop now. I think we've made a lot of progress here today."

"We're stopping now? I didn't get to talk after what he just said!" protested John.

"Save it for next time, John." Dr. Adams stood and motioned towards the door. Randy stood up first, tugging John up by his hand. "We'll see you next week, Doc. Thanks a lot,"

"Yeah, thanks," mumbled John as he followed Randy out of the office. They walked down the hall towards the exit, their hands unlinking somewhere along the way, each lost in their own thoughts.

* * *

"Hey, are you all packed? Bus will be here at the crack of dawn tomorrow. Gimme your bag and I'll put it downstairs with mine and Al's."

John looked over his shoulder and nodded, zipping up his bag and passing it over to Randy. His fingers brushed Randy's as he took the bag from him and John's stomach clenched as he watched him leave. They had arrived from the doctor's office hours earlier but their evening had been consumed by dinner and activities with their daughter, John spending every minute he could with her before she went off for the week with Randy. By the time she had finally fallen asleep, each man had retreated to his own bedroom to pack up for their week's work and the hours had passed before they knew it. John had been anxious to continue the discussion from therapy earlier that day but also knew he shouldn't push Randy too far and make him clamp up again. The younger man was finally opening and making a real effort to get their marriage back to what it was and John didn't want to change that. The temptation to continue talking and get them there faster, though, was overwhelming to John.

"All right, see you in like 5 hours. Good night," Randy tapped on John's door gently to get his attention and shot him a smile before he began to move towards his own room. John quickly walked over to the door and called out to him, pushing aside all his worries. "Ran, wait. Come here, please,"

Randy frowned and turned over, walking back. "What's wrong?"

John held the door open and motioned Randy inside his bedroom. He closed the door after him and turned over, nervousness radiating through his body. "Can we finish talking? The Doc kinda cut us off earlier."

Randy crossed his arms over his chest and shrugged. "Sure if you think this is a good time. We have to be up in less than 5 hours at this point..."

"I just want to tell you how I feel after what you said, Ran." John took a step closer to where Randy stood. "I never wanted you to feel like I abandoned you and I'm sorry I walked away from you when you needed me most. Now that I think about it, I could've handled it all a lot better and in a different way."

Randy frowned and quickly shook his head. "No, John, stop. I never blamed you for anything!" He stopped and smiled. "Well, at least not when I was sober and in my right mind. I understood why you left. You had to so I could get better. I had to hit rock bottom so I could realize what I had and I did in the rehab. I'm thankful I did."

"I just," John sighed and tried to process his thoughts so he could frame his words. "I need you to know that even if at one point I didn't want you, Ran, there's nothing you could ever do that would make me stop loving you. Please tell me you know that."

Randy tilted his head to the side, a smile on his face. "I realized that when you came to see me in that rehab after all the hell I had put you through over the years. It was a great feeling, John but what I really needed from you was that time away. I needed to know I could stand on my own, without you and I learned in there that I could if I had to. I don't want to, though. If I can have you in my life , I want you."

John nodded and closed the gap between them. "Me, too. I have always and will always want you in my life, Ran."

He moved his head forward, resting his forehead on Randy's. He saw Randy's eyes close and couldn't help moving his lips up to them and placing a gentle kiss on both lids before pulling away. "I guess we should go to bed now."

Randy pulled back slightly and nodded, his now open eyes staring intently into John's. "Yeah, we should. I'm actually really tired; really, really tired. I'm thinking it might be better if I crash in here tonight."

John's eyes widened and they followed Randy's form as he walked over to his bed and slid in. "Are you kidding me right now?"

Randy shook his head and sat up, peeling his t-shirt off and leaving his body clad only in pajama bottoms. "Not really. Are you coming?"

John moved over to the bed slowly, still unsure of what was happening. "OK..." He walked over to the opposite side of the bed and slid in beside Randy, careful to leave some distance between them.

Randy reached a hand back and shut off the light, leaving the room only lit by the moonlight seeping in through the blinds. He turned his eyes back to John, and smiled at the confusion on his face. "I just wanted to be with you tonight. I mean, we're not gonna do anything but...if you don't want me here, I'll go back to my bed."

John quickly shook his head, a hand reaching out to grip Randy's waist. "No, don't! I want you here, too. We don't have to do anything."

Randy nodded, tensing slightly when he felt John's hand on his bare skin. John felt the tension and pulled away, turning over to give Randy his back. It was only a few minutes later when he felt the younger man press against him and slide his arm around his waist. John held his breath, waiting for Randy's next move. He moved his hand down to link with the one Randy had loosely wrapped around him. "I missed this,"

John's words came out in a whisper and Randy tightened his hold, his breath tickling John's neck before he placed a kiss on the skin below his ear. "Me, too, Johnny."

John slowly turned over, meeting Randy's eyes and soft smile. He lifted his hand to smooth over his face, trailing down to his neck to his chest to wrap around his hips once more. He pulled the younger man into his body and arranged them comfortably, Randy resting his head on his chest as he had done from the first night they had spent together. John sighed deeply, feeling content and at peace for the first time in months and slowly drifted off to sleep.

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	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Update time!**

The shrill screech of the alarm made John's eyes snap open instantly and he blindly reached his arm over to shut it off. He blinked his eyes rapidly, trying to wake up despite the early morning start and how exhausted he still felt. A warmth and pressure on his chest drew his attention down and his eyes landed on Randy's head. The younger man still snored lightly from where he rested his head on John's chest. John slowly smiled and tried to shift his body without disturbing Randy. He managed to push his head onto a pillow without waking him up which didn't surprise John. Randy was known for being dead to the world when asleep and it seemed not much had changed since the last time they'd shared a bed.

John rested his head on the pillow besides Randy's and watched him breathe, his face so calm. It was a sight John had not seen in months and one he had missed desperately. He had spent countless hours watching Randy sleep during the course of their relationship, despite the younger man telling him how disturbing it was to him. It was amazing for him to study Randy's usually animated face and see the difference in it when he was so relaxed and at peace while he slept.

Randy stirred in his sleep as he felt the touch on his face. His eyes slowly opened and he was met with the sight of John beside him, staring at him. The older man's lips curved into a smile and he lowered his hand from Randy's face to his chest. "Hey,"

Randy slowly smiled. "How many times have I asked you to not stare at me when I'm sleeping?"

John shrugged. "You know I don't listen." His fingers moved of their own accord up and down Randy's chest.

Randy rolled his eyes but maintained the smile. His eyes soon drifted shut once more as John's touches on his body continued. He knew he should get up and stop the intimate moment, especially as he felt his lower regions start to react, but he just couldn't pull away. A sigh escaped his lips as John moved his hand down to his stomach, making soft circles on the firm muscle. "That feels good," he whispered.

John nodded, his lips brushing over Randy's head. "You feel good. I've missed touching you."

"I've missed it, too." Randy's eyes slowly opened, connecting with John's once more. "Your touch is the only one I've ever needed,"

John's eyes suddenly darkened and his hand stilled on Randy's stomach. "That's not exactly true."

Randy frowned, shocked by John's sudden mood change. He stared at John as he pulled away and sat up, standing from the bed. "What just happened?"

John shook his head and walked over to his dresser to pull out clean clothes and Randy could see the tension in his back and shoulders.

"My touch is the only one you've ever needed? I wish you would've remembered that a few months ago when you were in bed with Cody," muttered John, answering Randy's question.

Randy's eyes widened, all contentment gone from his body now. "Are you serious? You're actually gonna ruin one of the best mornings we've had in months over this?" He stood up off the bed angrily. "Fine, you wanna play this game, let's play. You say you've missed touching me? Well, you didn't miss me when you were in bed with Dwayne."

John turned over, his mouth opened slightly as Randy glared at him. He took a deep breath and forced his rising anger down. "Let's not do this, Ran. Neither of us are gonna win here."

"Well, you started it." Randy headed for the bedroom door and gripped the handle. He pulled the door open and walked out, letting it slam behind him. John sighed as the slam echoed through the empty room and mentally called himself every single name in the book. He shouldn't have ruined the happy moment with Randy, especially going so far as to mentioning Cody's name. It had just bubbled up from inside him and he hadn't been able to stop it. His mind and body felt like they were playing ping pong. It went from moments where John was convinced he wanted nothing more than to throw his husband on the bed and ravage him to moments where he could barely touch him because he imagined Cody in his place.

John groaned loudly and headed for the bathroom, clothes in hand. It wasn't time to analyze his mind especially when a glanced at the clock told him he was already running half an hour late. He pushed his thoughts aside and ran for the shower, finishing it and dressing at record speed. His eyes frantically searched the room for his luggage and travel documents then remembered giving them to Randy the night before.

John slowly exited the room, leaving it in its messy state for the housekeeper to deal with. He peered up and down the hall and saw no sign of Randy but heard the muffled sounds of his voice with Alanna. Quickly descending the stairs, John saw all the packed bags standing in front of the door and the backpack he kept his smaller items in, including plane tickets and passport, laying beside them. A small smile crossed his lips as he walked over to the pile of luggage so neatly arranged by Randy and such a familiar sight to see.

"Daddy!"

John turned at the sound of his daughter's voice and smiled as she barreled her way into his arms. He hugged her tightly and lifted her into his arms. "I'm gonna miss you so much, baby."

"I'm gonna miss you, too." Alanna pulled back from the hug, a small pout on her face. "I wish you and Daddy went to the same place all the time like when I was little."

John nodded and pressed a kiss to her forehead. "Me, too, baby."

A loud horn echoed through the home, startling all 3 members of the family. Randy quickly walked over to the large window looking into the driveway and pulled back. "All right, we have to go now, Al. Ray's here with the bus."

Alanna clutched onto John's neck tightly. "Not yet, Daddy!"

Randy sighed and moved to the front door, opening it to let their longtime bus driver in. Ray smiled at them and moved towards the luggage, Randy pointing out his and Alanna's before turning his attention back to his daughter.

"Al, there's no time for this. We have to go."

John hugged his daughter tightly and placed a final kiss on her forehead. "You gotta go, baby but I'll see you in a few days. Be a good girl and have fun. I love you so much, princess."

Alanna nodded, her eyes sad. She let John lower her to the ground and quickly ran over to grab her small backpack. John watched her walk off with Ray before turning his attention to Randy, whose eyes were focused on the wristwatch he wore.

"Your car should be here in like 5 minutes,"

John frowned at Randy's barely spoken mumble. "My car?"

Randy looked up and rolled his eyes. "Yes, your car. How did you expect to get to the airport? You were planning on flying?"

John laughed softly and shook his head. "Oh, I didn't even think of that."

"Of course you didn't. You assumed I would take care of it like I always do," Randy walked over to the door and took the final bag pertaining to him in his hands. He looked at John over his shoulder while standing in the doorway. "Have a good week,"

"Randy, wait!" John walked over to Randy and grabbed his hand, pulling him back in. "We can't leave for a week without talking about what happened upstairs."

"Look, John, I know you're big on talking and stuff but," Randy sighed and shook his head. "We can't right now. I have to go and I don't want to start anything we can't finish."

"Please, Ran, just give me a minute!" John held fast to Randy's hand until finally he relented. Randy took a few steps closer to John and waited.

"This morning was great, Ran. The whole night was. Just the feel of you beside me is something that I have missed so much. Then, this morning, waking up the same way we've woken up for years…it was so good, Ran. I've missed it so much. Just being able to look at you and touch you." John stopped and shook his head, unsure of how to continue. He tried to think about his words but decided to just say what was in his heart. "Look , Ran, every time I think of touching you or kissing you, I get a mental image of Cody doing those things to you. I can't stop imagining that night and I get so angry! We made a vow to only share each other with each other and the thought that someone else has been with you in the same way I was, it drives me crazy. I want those thoughts to go away but I don't know how to make them go away. Does that even make sense to you?"

Randy turned his head to the side and stared off into the living room. His eyes landed on one of the many pictures of him and John, arms entwined and smiling, on their mantle. "Of course it makes sense, John. Don't you think I know that? Don't you think I'm going through the same thing with you?" He slid his hands into his pockets and stood awkwardly. "Look, first things first, I hate the fact that Cody and I had sex. It was the worst mistake of my life and I can assure you, it was nothing like it was when it's me and you. Two drunken guys, one who's also high off his ass, is not a good combination for a night of great lovemaking. Either way, we were intimate in a way I wish we never had been and I know it has to be a fucking nightmare for you. It's the same fucking nightmare for me when I picture you and Dwayne doing things we only swore we would do with each other. I mean, just the fact that he kissed you makes me sick to my stomach. Add that to the fact that I actually caught a glimpse of you and him in action, well…"

John held up his hand and shook his head. "Please stop. My stomach is already turning." He lowered his hand and leaned on the open door. "What are we gonna do about this? I'm sick of this tension and this crazy flip flop we keep doing!"

"We're gonna keep trying to fix things and get better because its obvious we still need a hell of a lot more help," responded Randy, a small smile on his face. "Just keep focusing on the one day we can actually be together again…in every way."

"That sounds like heaven," John stood up straight and walked the few feet to where Randy stood. "I'm gonna miss you so much."

Randy smirked and looked away from John's intent gaze. "Don't get emotional. Anyway, remember, absence makes the heart grow fonder."

John laughed and nodded. "Fine, fine, no emotions." He took a deep breath and motioned out to the bus. "I guess you should go."

Randy nodded and smiled. "I'm gonna miss you, too." He wrapped his arms around John's shoulders, tensing slightly until he felt John quickly embrace him as well, his thick arms wrapping around his waist. Randy relaxed in the embrace and rested his head on John's neck, inhaling deeply the smell that could only be described as belonging to his husband. John turned his head, staring at Randy's lips so close to his but he made no move to join them. "I love you, Randy."

Randy's lips curved into a smile and he nodded softly, rubbing his nose against John's before placing a quick kiss on it. "I love you, too, Johnny. I'll see you in a few days back here, OK."

"OK," John pulled back and released Randy from his hold, watching as he quickly walked towards and into the bus. He lifted his hand in a wave and Ray honked the horn back at him as he drove out of the large driveway. A small sigh escaped him as he found himself alone and he turned to walk back into the house and await the car that would take him to the airport. As he closed the door, his cell phone vibrated in his pocket and John quickly fished it out, frowning at the unfamiliar number.

"Hello,"

"Mr. Cena, how are you? It's Mrs. Long from Adoption Advocates,"

John's eyes widened at the sound of Mrs. Long's voice. She was the Director of the adoption agency he and Randy had contacted and worked with since the moment they decided they wanted a child of their own. "Mrs. Long, how are you? What can I do for you?"

"I'm well, thank you," A small sigh escaped her before continuing. "Let me start by saying how happy I was to hear you and Mr. Orton had been matched with one of our clients. I know you two have waited a very long time for a child."

"Yes, Randy and I were thrilled to hear. We can't wait," responded John, alarm rising in him for some unknown reason.

"I know that and that's why this is a very difficult phone call for me to make,"

John's heart began to race and he lowered his body onto the sofa closest to him. "What's wrong?"

"The young woman carrying the child that would've been adopted by you and Mr. Orton was involved in a car accident yesterday. She came through but the baby did not survive. I'm sorry," Mrs. Long's voice held the same disappointment coursing through John's body now. He sat motionlessly on the sofa, shocked into a state of numbness and lowered the phone slowly from his ear. He could hear Mrs. Long still speaking but he quickly mumbled a goodbye and ended the call, unable to continue the conversation.

John barely heard the phone clatter on the hardwood floor it landed upon. He sat on the sofa, stunned and heard Mrs. Long's voice on repeat in his head. A loud knock on the door minutes later snapped him out of his shock. He turned over to look at it just as a yell came from behind it, "Mr. Cena, its Lincoln Cars! You have a scheduled pick up heading for Tampa International…"

John quickly stood. "I'll be right there!" He cleared his throat and took a deep breath before walking towards the door and opening it. His assigned driver smiled at him and took the bags from his hand, swiftly turning away and heading for the car. John shut the door behind him and listened for the beep of the alarm, signaling it was active. He quickly walked over to the car and slid in the backseat, his mind still swirling with thoughts. The baby meant for him and Randy had died; it no longer existed. The main reason he and Randy had come back together and had agreed to work on saving their marriage was gone. What would happen to them now?

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	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Update time!**

The days flew by before John realized it and before he knew it, 3 days had passed since he had said goodbye to Randy. From the moment he walked out of his home and put on his "John Cena of the WWE" hat, he barely had a moment that wasn't consumed by appearances, interviews, meetings and actual performing in the ring. By the time he arrived to his designated hotel room for the night, the small amount of energy he had left was reserved for his nighttime conversation with Alanna. He knew the exhaustion he felt after a long day of work was shared by Randy and it was obvious neither was in the mood for a long, serious conversation. They listened as the other spoke briefly about their day, voiced their love for each other and said good night. John knew he should bring up the call from the adoption agency to Randy but the thought of doing so via cell phone and when they were miles away was something he just couldn't do. It was easier to wait the final few remaining days until they were together again before they tackled that difficult subject.

John exited the bathroom of his hotel room for the night in Austin, Texas and slipped on some underwear. He threw his body onto the king size bed provided for him and stared at the television, mindlessly flipping through the channels looking for entertainment. He dropped the remote after coming upon the ESPN channel and picked up his cell phone. After a quick glance at the time and calculating the difference between where Randy was in Atlanta, Georgia, he decided to try and see if the younger man had already left the arena for the night. A few rings into the call and his question was answered when he heard Randy's weary voice answer, "Hey,"

Despite the exhaustion he felt and the same he heard in Randy's voice, John smiled. "Hey. I'm surprised to see you answering. You didn't stay for the whole show?"

"No, I couldn't. Al isn't feeling well so I just wanted to get her on the bus so she could take some medicine and sleep it off," responded Randy.

John quickly frowned in concern and sat up. "What's wrong with her?"

"She must've picked up a little bug or something. She had an upset stomach and a fever but it wasn't too high. I gave her the meds right away and made her eat some soup and then she went right to bed. I'm sure she'll wake up better tomorrow," answered Randy quickly in an effort to calm John's nerves. "Don't worry, Johnny."

John slowly relaxed back onto his pillows and rolled his eyes. "I will always worry about our daughter, Ran."

"It's because you're the maternal one." teased Randy, causing John to laugh softly. "Shut up,"

John took a deep breath and debated once more whether that was the best time to tell Randy the secret he had been holding for days. Just as he decided to come clean and opened his mouth to speak, Randy suddenly spoke up again. "You have no idea how much I wished you were here with me today."

John's eyes widened at Randy's softly spoken, emotion filled statement. He pressed his lips together and licked them nervously. "Why? What's going on?"

"I just miss you and I wish you were here. Things are weird, bad, shitty…you name it." responded Randy. "We had a SummerSlam meeting today and the main topic was Brock and his match. The thought of having to see that man again…just the sound of his name is making me sick."

"I know. We had our own meeting and I kinda felt the same way when I heard his name." John suddenly smiled. "Well, not really. I didn't feel sick so much as I felt like punching a hole through his head."

Randy's voice remained somber. "I can't believe this man is coming back and is gonna be in the same locker room I'm in and that I'm just supposed to just go about our business like nothing happened. I'm supposed to ignore the fact that he tried to fuck me over and damn near ruined my marriage…"

"Stop. He didn't ruin anything. We're fixing it, remember?" interrupted John quickly. "The day you actually come face to face with that asshole you won't be alone, Ran. I'll be there and he'll see that his goal of fucking up your life didn't come true."

Randy remained silent for a few seconds before speaking again, his voice so low that John barely heard him. "Promise me?"

A smile came across John's face and he wished for the hundredth time that he were in bed beside Randy so he could reassure him. "Yes, Ran, I promise you. I will stand beside you and rub it in his face how happy we are and how much in love we still are with each other."

"I love you, Johnny. I wish you were here in bed with me right now." replied Randy, his voice morphing into a tone John hadn't heard in months; a tone that made his body go into sensory overload. He inhaled sharply and clutched the sheets underneath his hand tightly in his fist and whispered back, "So do I."

John quickly cleared his throat and tried to calm his raging body. He knew the last thing Randy was trying to do was excite him, especially since he was probably in bed with their daughter. It was just him reading too much into Randy's words. The younger man had always been able to send his hormones into overdrive, be it with a look or his voice. John took a few deep breaths and slowly felt himself relax.

"John, you still there?" A worried Randy now asked and John quickly responded. "Yeah, I'm here. I'm just a little tired, I guess."

"I'll let you sleep then…"

"No!" interrupted John before Randy could end the call. "I'm tired but that doesn't mean I don't want to talk to you. I love talking to you no matter what."

"OK, then, but enough about me. Tell me about your day," responded Randy sounding much happier. John smiled and shrugged to himself. "Meetings, signing, appearances, 2 hour meeting with Creative then wrestling. Same old shit, another day."

Randy laughed in his ear. "The life of Super Cena. Well, at least you can't ever complain you're bored and have nothing to do."

"I wouldn't mind a little boredom sometimes. By the time I get home I'm too exhausted to do anything but sleep and that stinks when you have a kid who wants your attention." John rolled his eyes and lowered his bed further into bed, shutting off the television.

"Well, not this time. Al won't be with us in Tampa this week, remember? I'm dropping her off with Sam and then I'll head home alone. Looks like it's just you and me this week, Cena."

John's exhaustion suddenly disappeared and his eyes widened. "What?"

"Did you forget? It's Sam's week," replied Randy. "Remember Sam? I know you two have never been the best of friends but she plays the role of the mom…"

John could practically see the smirk on Randy's face as he teased him. "Yes, I remember Sam, funny man. I just forgot it was her week. You know in my ideal world Ally is with us always."

"I know. That's my ideal world, too." Randy sighed in his ear. "Anyway, we'll have to find some way to entertain ourselves while in Florida. We have therapy for a couple of days but other than that I don't know what we can do. You know I hate being down there. It's too damn noisy. I hate the city."

"Yes, I know you hate the city and that you only go down there for me. I promise I'll think of a way to entertain you, Orton," mumbled John.

"Oh, is that so? How are you gonna entertain me?" asked Randy, his tone deepening once more. John frowned and decided to ignore it in an effort to keep his sanity. He cleared his throat and took a deep breath. "I have my ways. Whatever we do decide to do, though, we need to set aside a couple of hours to talk, just you and me, preferably before the therapist appointment."

"Oh, God. What now? I can't take any more bad news, John." Randy groaned loudly in his ear, all teasing and flirting now over. "Just tell me now and get it over with."

"Ran, I don't feel comfortable telling you over the phone. Let's just wait until we're home and together, OK." pleaded John.

A loud sigh was his only answer. John groaned inwardly, annoyed at himself for telling Randy of the news that awaited him at home. He should've known better than to mention anything to the younger man. Randy had never been the most patient soul.

"Ran, it's nothing we can't work out together. Trust me, baby, please," John held his breath, hoping for some type of response from his husband. Asking for his trust and using a term of endearment didn't seem to go over well with Randy after all they'd been through but John didn't know how else to break through the silence.

Surprisingly, when Randy finally responded, he spoke calmly. "OK. I'll just wait till we get home. I'd better get some sleep in case Al wakes up at the crack of dawn feeling better."

"Sounds like a good idea. Give her a kiss for me and tell her how much I love her and miss her." John smiled as he spoke of his daughter.

"I will. I'm sure she'll want to call you as soon as she wakes up since she missed your call tonight. Don't complain if it's a 6am, though." Randy laughed softly. "Have a good night, Johnny."

"You, too, Ran." John ended the call feeling more at peace with the whole baby secret he was keeping. At least he had given Randy a warning of the serious talk that was to come. There was no way he could be accused of lying now. He settled down into his bed, positive Randy's premonition of being awoken by his daughter at the crack of dawn would come true.

* * *

Two days later, John found himself in his Tampa home all alone. Randy had taken a flight from Atlanta directly to St. Louis to drop off Alanna. Sam had promised to meet him at the airport so he could take a flight coming down to Tampa as soon as possible and for once, she had kept her promise. Randy's flight should've arrived in Tampa almost an hour earlier so according to John's schedule, he should be home any minute. Randy, however, did not work according to John's schedule and asking him to do so never worked. Therefore, John found himself wandering around his empty house and forcing his patience to the breaking point.

After his husband had still not arrived half an hour later, John decided to put himself to work. He dragged his suitcase into the laundry room and carefully sorted out the clothes, reading off the directions Randy had posted on the wall after his first laundry disaster. He loaded the washer and put in the designated amount of soap then took a step back, a pleased grin on his face as he saw the machine begin to work. After a quick glance at his watch, John exited the laundry room and walked into the kitchen, debating whether to order lunch for him and Randy. As he lifted the phone to his ear, the sound of a car pulling into the driveway distracted him. John quickly dropped the phone on the counter and ran to the door, smiling happily as he saw Randy exit the car, luggage in tow. He pulled the door open and stepped out into the sunshine, his smile widening as Randy approached. "Thank God you're home! What took you so long?"

Randy raised an eyebrow. "I can't control traffic, John."

John shook his head and took the suitcase from Randy's hand. "It doesn't matter as long as you're home. I was going crazy all alone here. I actually started doing my laundry."

Randy's eyes widened as he followed John into the home, closing the door behind him. "Oh God,"

"I followed your instructions, I swear!" John held up his hand and laughed softly, leading the way into the laundry room. "I've learned how to work the machine. Took me a couple of years but I learned…"

Randy followed him into the room and saw the machine working effortlessly. John watched him, a proud smile on his face. Randy took his suitcase from John's hand and rested it against the wall. "Very good, Johnny. I'm very proud. You could do mine next."

John rolled his eyes and turned around, starting out of the room but Randy quickly reached for his arm and tugged him back in. John spun around from the force of the tug and found himself pressed up against the younger man, their eyes locked. Randy locked his arms around his John's waist and slowly smiled. "I missed you,"

John relaxed in the embrace, his own arms reaching up to circle Randy's neck. "I missed you, too. For a minute there I panicked. I thought you were going to stay in St. Louis and not come down here with me."

Randy frowned and shook his head. "I promised you I was coming to this home. I wasn't going to break my promise to you. I couldn't wait to see you, Johnny."

John nodded, his hands moving up and down Randy's back as he fought the urge to pull him forward and press their lips together. "Same here."

Randy rested his forehead against John's and closed his eyes. He could feel his body reacting to John's touch and desperately wanted to ask him for more. The desire to pull him down to the floor was almost overwhelming and he had to fight his body over it. Quickly placing a kiss on John's head, Randy pulled out of the embrace and smiled. "I'm starving. Can we order some food?"

John groaned inwardly at how empty his arms felt without Randy in them. He followed him out of the room and into the large kitchen and watched as he grabbed the phone he'd discarded earlier and placed an order with their local diner for deliver. John's eyes lowered to the marble countertop as he sank into a chair behind it. Now that Randy was here he would have no choice but to tell him of the baby's death. Despite his desire to hide it because of his fear of Randy's reaction, he knew he couldn't. Starting their relationship over was hard enough. Doing it all based on a lie; that he couldn't do.

"John!"

John's head snapped back up at Randy's sharp call. "What?"

"I've been talking to you for the past couple of minutes. Where were you?" Randy walked around the counter to lean in front of where John stood.

"I'm sorry. I'm just distracted," he responded truthfully.

Randy nodded. "You're distracted by what you have to tell me, right?"

John quickly lowered his head, wordlessly admitting to Randy what he said was true. Randy sighed and reached out to run his fingers over John's face. He gently lifted it and smiled. "Johnny, why are you worried? Why are you so stressed out about this? You told me that we would be able to work it out together. If that's true, then there's no need to worry about it."

John reached up to grab Randy's waist, pulling him into his lap. He buried his face in Randy's neck and inhaled deeply the smell of his husband. "I just don't want to lose you,"

Randy wrapped an arm around John's shoulders and kissed the top of his head. "Johnny, just tell me what's wrong before I start imagining the worst."

John quickly looked up and met Randy's concerned look. "You know our baby?"

Randy frowned. "Al?"

"No," John sighed and shook his head. "The adoption; the one Mrs. Long called me about,"

"Oh, yeah." Randy smiled but shook his head. "Can we finally meet the girl? Could we at least see a sonogram pic?"

John lowered his head once more. "The baby died, Ran."

Randy's eyes widened and he slowly stood up. "What? How…"

"The girl was in a car accident. She's fine but the baby died. Mrs. Long called to tell me on Friday like 5 minutes after your bus pulled away. I wanted to tell you so bad but I just couldn't. Every time I tried to tell you, I just couldn't."

John stopped his frantic rambling the minute Randy rose his hand. He watched as Randy walked farther away from him and began to pace the living room, shaking his head. "You've known about this for almost 5 days and you're just telling me now?"

John quickly stood up and walked over to him. "We were so far away from each other and doing over the phone just didn't feel right, Ran."

Randy shook his head. "No, that's not it. You thought I was gonna freak out over this and want to stop therapy, didn't you? You still don't trust me, do you?"

John quickly frowned and shook his head. "No, baby, I never thought that…."

"Stop it! You're a shitty liar, John." Randy's voice grew in anger. "Tell me the truth! It would be the first time you have in months!"

John's eyes suddenly narrowed and he found his feet carrying him to where Randy stood. "Listen to me, Ran. I get you're pissed but you need to tone down that righteous fucking attitude of yours. If I didn't trust you, and I'm not saying I don't, you know damn well I have a right not to. That's not the point here. Yes, I may have had one quick moment of question when it comes to you and our therapy but I realized just as quickly that if you love me the way you say you do, you wouldn't quit on me, baby or no baby. I'm telling you the truth right now. I didn't tell you sooner because we were miles away and that wasn't any way to break the news to you that the baby we had waited 3 years for was now gone! If you think I did wrong somehow, then please fucking forgive me!"

Randy clenched his jaw tightly, a muscle ticking rapidly on the side of his face as he glared at John in anger. He lifted his head and walked around John, stopping when he got to the doorway. "You know, me staying in St. Louis this week might not have been such a bad idea after all."

**A/N: REVIEW!**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Wow, a lot of people pissed off at Randy, LOL! Loved reading all your reviews!**

John scowled as he watched the television before him, channel after channel going by with nothing interesting him at all. It seemed even the television Gods were against him. He had retired up to his room after Randy had decided to barricade himself in the guest room once more. The younger man hadn't even bothered to come down for the dinner he'd ordered when it arrived. John had contemplated going up to get him but his frustration over their argument had kept him downstairs. He had eaten his part of the dinner, though now he regretted it as it sat like a lump in his stomach, and refrigerated Randy's portion for whenever he felt like coming out. That had been over 4 hours ago and he hadn't heard a sound come from Randy's room. It didn't matter, though. At one point over the course of the 4 hours, John had stopped listening. His own anger had been steadily building and it had taken all the strength he had to not barge into Randy's room and tear into him for his reaction over the news.

John groaned and finally shut off the TV, slamming the remote on the nightstand in annoyance. He shut off the small lamp near his bed and arranged the pillows under his head, figuring he should get some sleep and just forget everything that happened that day. However, just as the exhaustion made his eyes start to drift shut, the overhead lamp turned on, flooding the room with light. John's eyes pressed shut as his forehead creased into a frown at the sudden brightness.

"I know you're not asleep yet so get up,"

John's eyes snapped open at the sound of Randy's voice and he quickly pulled his body up. "What the hell are you doing in here?"

Randy's face was devoid of emotion as he walked further into the room but John could see the emotions flashing across his eyes. "I had enough time to myself and I thought about it. I may have overreacted to what you told me earlier. I apologize."

John barely heard Randy as he mumbled his apology before he could even blink. He frowned and tried to wake his sleepy brain up so it could process Randy's words and apology. "You're apologizing?"

Randy shrugged and nodded simultaneously. "Yeah, I do know how to say sorry. I can admit when I'm an asshole. Are we good now?"

John's frown deepened and he slowly shook his head. "No, we're not 'good' now, Randy. That half ass apology does nothing for me."

Randy rolled his eyes. "Well, then what do you want, John? Just tell me what the hell you need to end this fight because come tomorrow, we'll probably be having another one that I'll have to fix! Fighting is all we seem to do lately and I'm sick of it!"

"Don't I know it! I'm sick of it, too, Randy." John sighed and met Randy's glare head on. "I can't just let this one go despite how much I want to. I don't understand why you instantly thought the worst of me and my intentions! Why can't it just be as simple as me not wanting to hurt you, Randy?"

"Because you did hurt me, John!" responded Randy loudly. His eyes instantly widened and he turned away from John's piercing stare, shocked by what he'd said.

John quickly stood and walked over to where Randy stood, avoiding him as best he could. "What are you talking about, Ran? It's not like I was responsible for the car accident that killed that baby."

"That's not what I mean, John," Randy moved away from John and walked to the opposite side of the room. "It's terrible what happened to that baby. I wanted him or her so much and I know you did, too. It wasn't meant to be, though. Everything in this world happens for a reason. We've got to accept that."

"Then, what do you mean?" John remained where he was, accepting of Randy's need for space. He watched as the younger man began to pace around the room, the expression in his face making it obvious he regretted bringing up the conversation in the first place.

"John, you've hurt me before so why wouldn't I think you were trying to hurt me now? You have doubts about so much having to do with me that it's no surprise you thought I was gonna bail on you and the therapy. I know this but it doesn't hurt any less when you say it out loud. Still, I fooled myself into thinking you trust me again, a least a little bit but then when you said you hid this from me for days, I just felt like a dumbass for thinking you could ever trust me again. Then, I snapped at you because how dare you not trust me? I should be the one who doesn't trust you!" Randy stopped when he saw John's face harden once more. He quickly held up his hand before the older man could speak. "John, the reason I was pissed was because I let my imagination get away with me. I get what you were trying to do and I would've done the same. There's no way I could've told you something that serious over the phone, either."

"Randy, I don't get what it's gonna take for us to stop this nonsense." John sighed and walked over to where Randy stood, ignoring the way he instantly took a step away. "I may not trust you like I did some years ago but I'm slowly getting there. It's gonna take time but I am getting there. I know you would never do anything to hurt me again. I know you're committed to fixing us. I need you to believe that I'm just as committed, though and that I have no plans of ever hurting you again." He shrugged and looked down at his bare feet. "I know what I did to you, Ran. I swear I will never betray you like that again. I want nothing in this world to ever hurt you again, including me. I was just trying to protect you."

"I know you were. Isn't it just easier to believe the worst, though?" Randy smiled and shrugged, relaxing slightly.

John rolled his eyes. "Of course you would. Damn pessimist."

Randy laughed loudly and shook his head. "I'm a realist, Cena, not a pessimist." The smile remained on his face and he stared at John warily. "You really believe everything you said? That you trust I won't hurt you or give up on us? That you're starting to trust me again?"

John groaned and his body slumped down onto the bed. "What do I have to do, Ran? Tattoo it on my ass? Jesus, if I could learn to trust you again, why can't you attempt to trust me? I mean, we both did equally horrible things to each other so..."

"John," Randy interrupted, sitting besides the older man and placing his finger over his lips. "I get it now. I was kinda just messing with you. No need for another rant."

John glared at Randy and shook his head. "You are the most infuriating man I have ever met and why I still put up with you I really don't..."

"What's it gonna take to shut you up?" Randy asked, moving his finger across John's lips and moving his face forward. "This?" He moved his hand around John's neck and gripped it forcefully, pulling the older man's face to his and kissing him harshly.

John yelped in surprise and his hands came up to rest on Randy's chest, pushing him away. Randy moved back, a surprised expression on his face. "What are you doing?"

John's eyes widened in surprise as he recoiled away from Randy. "Me? What am **I** doing? What are you doing? Are you messing with me?"

Randy smiled and shook his head. "No, John. I just did what felt right; what I wanted to do. I've missed you,"

John stared at Randy wordlessly for what seemed like hours before he spoke again. "I don't understand. You said you couldn't..."

"Johnny," Randy slid closer to John's body and stared into his eyes. "I don't want to think about that. Can't we just forget it all for one night and pretend this all never happened? Can we start moving on?"

John felt his heart begin to race from a mixture of nerves and excitement. This time it was he who reached for Randy and initiated the kiss. It was a softer kiss than the one before with gentle brushes of lips. Randy brushed John's soft lips with his and moved along the line of his jaw to his ear and whispered, "I want you, Johnny."

John moaned softly as Randy's tongue slid into his mouth. He moved his hand around Randy's body and rested it firmly on his lower back, pressing Randy's firm body against his. Randy pulled away from the kiss but kept his body pressed close to John's. "Lay down," he said.

Once John followed Randy's command and lowered his body to the bed, the younger man resumed kissing his lover. He lightly ran his hands up John's arms and then began to remove his shirt while trailing a line of soft kisses down his neck and every inch of flesh exposed as his shirt revealed John's smooth chest. When he got to John's nipples, he licked and nipped at one, while pinching and twisting the other, eliciting soft moans from the other man. As he felt the nipple harden into a small nub, he stopped sucking and lightly blew across it making John shudder, and then switched and gave its twin the same treatment. Randy resumed the trail of kisses as he traveled down across John's firm abdomen, down to his belly button and stopping at the waist of his boxers.

Randy sank to his knees and looked up at John whose eyes were dilated and filled with lust. While still looking into his eyes, he slowly pushed John's boxers down to his knees. Leaning forward, Randy nuzzled the base of John's cock, reveling in the scent that he loved and had missed so much. John's hard length lay against his cheek and grew harder with each feel of Randy's skin. Beginning at the base, Randy ran his tongue along the length of John's cock. When he reached the head, he licked up the pre-cum oozing from the small slit before taking the large head into his mouth. He looked up at John, seeking his eyes, but the older man had his eyes closed and his head thrown back, moaning with pleasure. Randy took a deep breath and slid his mouth down the length of John's cock swallowing reflexively when the head reached the back of his mouth, allowing him to take in all John had to offer.

John felt Randy's throat muscles grip the head of his cock and he groaned, "Fuck, baby that feels so good."

Randy began to work John's cock in earnest, hollowing out his cheeks as he applied suction to the hard shaft as he pulled back. Randy sucked on his cock until John couldn't handle the sensation anymore and he reached down and grabbed Randy's head, pulling him up. "Stop, Ran. It's been too long, baby and I'm not gonna last much longer,"

Randy groaned when he was pulled off John's cock, but he allowed himself to be pulled up. "I need you, Johnny. I need you inside me,"

John nodded, moaning with anticipation as Randy quickly shed his t-shirt and underwear. He took Randy back into his arms and brought their mouths together. Randy opened his mouth slightly and coaxed John's tongue into his as he wrapped his arms around his lovers back bringing their bodies together from chest to groin. As their tongues stroked above, their cocks, slick with pre-cum stroked below.

John slowly flipped Randy over so he was on top while still kissing him, refusing to break contact. He ran one hand slowly across Randy's chest and down to his tight abdomen before making contact with his rigid cock. Grasping the shaft, he tugged slightly and ran his thumb in circles across the sensitive head, spreading the pre-cum he found there. Finally breaking the kiss, he nibbled his way down Randy's neck to his chest where he took each hard nipple into his mouth in turn, before continuing downward stopping only to run his tongue around his belly button. He bypassed Randy's cock and sank lower, pushing Randy's legs open and revealing the small pucker of muscle that was his target.

Randy felt his legs automatically open wider as John began to lap at his entrance. It felt better than he remembered and he moaned with pleasure as John's tongue breached the ring and moved inside. His cock was so hard it was almost painful, but John continued his tongue play over and inside the tight ring of muscle. He brought a finger to Randy's entrance and worked it inside along with his tongue. He worked the finger around until he found what he was looking for and slowly rubbed Randy's spot with his fingertip. John looked up at Randy's face to see him looking down with his mouth open and panting.

"Oh God, John. I need you inside me so bad! Please, baby..." Randy begged as he reached down and grabbed his own cock. He was hard as stone and had a small puddle of pre-cum on his belly.

John pushed his hand away as he reached into the nightstand and thankfully was able to find a bottle of lube still inside. "Babe, don't touch yourself. I want you to cum with me inside you," he growled.

John opened the bottle of lube and drizzled the cool liquid down Randy's slightly parted opening, then filled his palm and slicked himself up. On his knees, he positioned himself at Randy's opening and pushed slowly, gasping as the head of his cock breached the tight ring of muscle and disappeared into the wet warmth. He paused to let Randy get used to the feeling of being filled again after so many months apart but Randy had a different idea. Randy wrapped his legs around John's hips and his arms around John's back and pulled hard enough to cause John to become fully seated inside him with one fluid motion.

Randy moaned loudly, "Oh, God, that feels so good. I missed you so much. Move, baby, please,"

John complied and began to move his hips in a slow rhythm, gradually picking up speed until they were both moaning in pleasure. Randy's body was tight and he flexed his muscles to squeeze John's cock every time he withdrew. The slight upward curve of John's cock rubbed at the small bundle of nerves of Randy's prostate on every thrust. Each of them was lost in the sensations of being together again and soon they were both moaning their extreme pleasure.

"I'm getting so close, John. I need to cum," breathed Randy. John leaned down to kiss him, his tongue invading his mouth in rhythm to his cock invading Randy's entrance before pulling away. "Then, cum for me baby,"

With a loud moan of John's name, Randy arched his back and began to cum, covering their abdomens with his release. Randy's orgasm forced his anal muscles to squeeze and milk John's cock. It was too much for John to handle and with his own scream, he buried his cock to the hilt inside Randy and let go, filling his insides with his own cum.

John collapsed onto Randy, resting his weight on the man below him and the two shared a soft kiss. "I love you so much, Randy,"

"I love you, too, Johnny," Randy replied, wrapping his arms around John's back and rubbing it gently.

John kissed Randy's neck softly, enjoying the taste of his husband's sweaty skin until he finally slipped from inside the younger man. He moved over to rest beside Randy, his eyes drifting shut. John felt Randy shift in the bed and slowly opened his eyes to see him cleaning his chest with one of the discarded pair of boxers. He smiled and handed them to John, who also cleaned up as best he could before turning over and pulling Randy into his arms. "I missed doing that with you."

"I'm sure you did. I'm really good at that," replied Randy, a small smirk on his face. He wrapped an arm around John's waist, resting his head on his chest as he heard John laugh above him. "You're suck a conceited little shit,"

Randy smiled and looked up. "Yet you love me,"

John looked down into Randy's eyes and nodded. "Yes, I do. So fucking much." He frowned and gripped Randy tighter. "Where do we go from here, Ran? Was this just a one night thing or are we back together for real or..."

"John, just enjoy this moment right now and let's worry about tomorrow when it comes." Randy reached up to run a finger over John's lips, stopping his flow of words. "Can you do that?"

John slowly nodded and kissed Randy's finger before letting him lower his hand back down to rest on his waist. "Yes, I can,"

Randy smiled and reached up to place a final kiss on John's lips before making himself comfortable on his chest once more. "Good. Now, lets get some sleep."

**A/N: OK, so I made you all wait 10 chapters before giving you some Centon loving, LOL! Hope you all liked and will review but be warned, there are still many things the boys have to work out and more fights to come. But** **after the fights comes the lovemaking so...REVIEW!**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Thanks for all the reviews, guys! Just a note to all who asked, John will not bottom in this story, not even once**.

John groaned as he rolled over in bed, his body aching like it hadn't in months. His eyes slowly opened, getting used to the sunlight shining into the room and one hand stretched over to the other side of the bed, expecting to land on Randy but instead landing upon the mattress. John frowned and turned over completely, sitting up when he realized Randy was really not in the bed beside him. He swung his legs over the side of the bed and gingerly stood, his muscles protesting even that action. Almost 4 months without spending a night with Randy had made the previous night feel like his first time ever. However, he wouldn't give up the aches in his body for anything if given a chance. They served to remind him of the amazing night he had.

John contemplated sliding on some pants and going to find Randy but it only took him seconds to rethink that idea. It was obvious the younger man had awoken some time before him and left, his reason unknown but John figured it wasn't worth starting a fight over. Maybe Randy's reason had nothing to do with what he was imagining; that the younger man regretted their actions the night before and didn't want to wake up with him like they had done for years before.

John shook his head and tried to stay positive as he pulled out some clothes from his closet and headed for the bathroom. There was no reason to think of the worst. Randy could've simply been hungry or could've woken up in the mood for a long run, as he had many mornings. Those were only 2 of the things that would make it necessary for him to leave John's room since he had nothing of his own there. With those thoughts in his head, John found it easier to enter the bathroom and prepare for the day. He turned the shower on to as hot as he could stand and let his muscles slowly relax under the stream while letting the negative thoughts remain out of his head.

Close to half an hour later John sauntered out of his room dressed in a comfortable pair of basketball shorts and t-shirt. He walked down the stairs slowly, inhaling the faint smell of brewed coffee that worked its way up to greet him. He could hear Randy's voice and it grew stronger as he approached the kitchen. A smile worked its way onto John's face as he stood in the doorway, staring as Randy sat on a chair surrounding the patio table right outside the kitchen door, a cup of coffee in one hand and his cell phone in the other. He lost himself in what was once a familiar sight but the moment was broken when he caught a part of Randy's conversation.

"It was a harsh blow for me and John but we'll work through it, Mrs. Long. I just hope you keep us in mind and we get lucky again soon. We've waited so long for this and we came so close this time and it has me kind of thinking that this was a sign; that this was proof it's never meant to happen. I don't want that to come true." Randy laughed softly and lowered his head. "Thanks, Mrs. Long. I hope to hear from you soon."

Randy ended the call and took a deep breath before frowning. He turned over to his side and saw John standing against the kitchen counter, staring at him. Randy smiled and slowly stood up, walking towards the older man. "Hey, good morning."

John smiled hesitantly and nodded. "Good morning."

Randy walked around the counter and grabbed a cup of the top, quickly filling it with coffee and handing it over to John. "Nice of you to wake up,"

John's smile relaxed and he lowered his body down to a seat as he took a long gulp of the warm coffee. "Usually it's the other way around, isn't it? I was surprised to wake up and find myself alone."

Randy nodded and walked over to stand in front of where John sat. "The phone was ringing and it woke me up. You looked so peaceful that I didn't want it to bother you. Once I was awake, though, I couldn't go back to sleep so I just came down here. It wasn't that long ago; maybe an hour."

John nodded but lowered his head after placing the now empty cup on the counter. "Oh, OK."

Randy smiled and took a step closer, sliding in between John's legs. He lifted the older man's face and stared into his eyes. "I don't regret what happened last night, Johnny. I wasn't trying to run from it. Wipe that thought from your head."

"No, that's not what I'm think…" began John but he stopped the minute he saw Randy's eyebrow arch after hearing his pathetic denial. He sighed and shrugged. "All right, I may have though it for like 2 minutes."

"2 minutes too long," responded Randy with an eye roll. He moved his hand from John's chin and wrapped it around the back of his neck. "Last night was fun,"

John smiled and tugged Randy down into his lap. "Really fun." He rested his head on Randy's shoulder, trailing his lips over his neck as he inhaled deeply the smell coming off his body. "I'm still a little annoyed I didn't get to wake up with you in my arms, though. I've missed that as much as I've missed what we did last night."

Randy kissed the top of John's head. "Last night was only one night, Johnny. They'll be more nights and mornings together to come."

John lifted his head, his eyes hopeful. "Promise?"

Randy leaned in close, his lips touching John's in a gentle kiss. The kiss became deeper and more passionate. His tongue snaked its way into John's mouth and the older man gave no resistance. Randy kissed him over and over, holding him close. John gasped when Randy's hand moved down his chest to lie on his growing erection and began stroking him in a gentle motion. He moved his lips to the back of Randy's neck, kissing the sensitive place just below the hairline and teasing the skin with his tongue. Randy shuddered and tiny goose bumps appeared, raising the hair on back of his neck. John moved up and kissed the back of his head, enjoying the soft dark hair against his face. He moved back to the side of his neck and teased Randy's ear with a soft nibble before pulling away.

"That feels so good," Randy said through a moan, his half lidded eyes locked onto John's.

John was silent for a few moments, lost in Randy's blue eyes. He broke the gaze to look down at the younger man's hand, still stroking him softly. "Do you really wanna start this because if you do we should move upstairs…"

Randy smiled and shook his head, placing one final kiss on John's lips before standing up. "As much as I would love that, we can't. We have therapy today, remember?" He winked over at John before taking both coffee cups over to the sink. "If I get you in bed right now, we won't be done until tomorrow, baby,"

John laughed and nodded. "Same here," He took a deep breath and tried to quell his excitement. As his eyes scanned over the kitchen, they landed on Randy's discarded cell phone on the patio table. He frowned when he remembered the part of the conversation he'd walked in on earlier between Randy and what he could only assume was the Mrs. Long from their adoption agency. Just as he opened his mouth to ask Randy what the call was about, Randy turned to look over at him and spoke first.

"I only had a piece of toast this morning. I could eat some more. Want me to make some pancakes or eggs or something?"

John quickly shook his head and blurted out the question before he could lose his nerve. "Why were you talking to Mrs. Long this morning?"

Randy shrugged and leaned on the side of the sink. "She called this morning to let us know again how sorry she was about the baby and to tell us not to lose hope. She said if one person picked us then someone else will pick us, too. She was just being nice, I guess. Who know? Maybe she thinks we're gonna move to another agency. I told her not to worry; that we weren't going anywhere and we would patiently wait for another baby because it's what we want more than anything."

John sighed in relief and nodded. "Oh, OK,"

"You sound relieved there, Cena." Randy grinned in amusement. "What did you think I was gonna tell her?"

John looked away from Randy and shrugged. "It's not me. It's that damn little devil on my shoulder that always thinks the worst."

"Tell that little devil to fuck off," Randy walked back over to where John sat. "Johnny, I really think we took a big step last night to work out our problems. We still have a long way to go but the fact that we were able to put it all aside last night and go back to being intimate, well; I think it proves we're on the right track."

"I know. You're right. I just," John stood and wrapped an arm around Randy's waist, pulling him close. "Last night was so amazing and it felt like you were mine again and I don't want to lose that feeling, Ran. It's an amazing feeling."

"I am still yours, Johnny," whispered Randy back. "And I want to feel like you're mine again."

"I am," answered John quickly. Randy smiled tensely and gently pulled away from John's embrace. "I wasn't going to ask you now. I was gonna wait till we were in with the doctor but since we're talking…"

"Randy, what is it, baby?" asked John, nervousness filling his eyes.

Randy sank down onto a chair and took a deep breath. "Was I a good husband? Did I fulfill everything you had in mind for how your husband should be? Was I not doing something that you wanted or was I doing it wrong? Did you want more?"

John frowned and shrugged. "I don't know what you mean, Ran. You are all I've ever wanted and I thought I proved that when I chose to marry you and spend the rest of my life with you. You are a wonderful husband. You love me and I know it with every bone in my body. You're there for me, you listen to me rant, you take care of me when I get sick, you're so protective of me…you do everything I need and want. How could I ever want anyone else?"

"Hmm," muttered Randy softly. He bit his lip and looked around the room, avoiding John's stare until the older man laughed. "Ran, something is obviously on your mind. Will you just say it?"

Randy smiled and let out a sigh. "We had such a good night and today has been pretty good so far…I just don't wanna ruin it, John."

"Randy, we're starting over, right?" John raised an eyebrow and waited for Randy's nod before continuing. "Then, we have to get it all off our chests. Tell me,"

Randy shrugged. "All right, you asked for it. Don't think I'm starting a fight, though. I'm just really curious."

John nodded and sat across from Randy, keeping his lips sealed. He watched as Randy took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

"Why did you sleep with Dwayne?" Randy frowned and shook his head. "I'm trying to understand because I haven't been able to in the past few months and I've tried, John. I tried putting myself in your shoes and imagining if it were you. What if you had gotten drunk one night and fucked Punk or somebody else first? I don't think I could've just thrown you aside and gone and fucked someone else as quickly as you did, whether for revenge or not. That's why I asked if I was a good husband because it seems to me that if I would've been, you may not have done that. I think if I really was everything you wanted in your life that maybe you would've fought for me; for us."

"Randy…"

Randy quickly shook his head. "No, please let me finish, John." He waited anxiously for John's nod and then continued. "I'm not a saint. I'm not saying that if the situation were reversed I wouldn't have wanted to do something to piss you off, too but wanting to do it and actually doing it are two different things. Actually doing something to hurt you that badly is something I can't do. I would've been so angry with you, yes but I don't think it would've stopped me from forgiving you. I just don't understand how I, who has never been the most forgiving soul, could've looked past something like this but you couldn't. You're supposed to be the loving, sweet and understanding one but you just threw it all away; me and our marriage. I wouldn't have done that. I would've fought for us."

Randy shrugged. "All right. You can talk now."

"I don't know what to say except I'm sorry. You're right," replied John, a sad look in his eyes.

Randy's eyes widened and his mouth dropped open in a silent gasp. "I'm right?"

John smiled and nodded. "Ran, it's so easy for me to just go back to our past and blame my reaction and actions on that. It was easy for me at the time to let my anger take over me. I was positive that night with Cody was going to be your first night of going back to the way you used to be and I felt like a moron because I had trusted you to stay clean for so many years. I didn't even stop to think that it wasn't possible for you to go back to the way you were because you weren't the one who chose to get high that night. I didn't care; I figured one taste, however you came upon it, was gonna be enough to make you throw away the last 3 years but I should've known better."

Randy remained silent as John's head lowered, the smile long gone from his face.

"Ran, you're the strongest person I know and I should've known better than to think you were gonna go back to using again. I should've had faith in us and I should've tried to understand what happened to you better. You were betrayed by people you thought were your friends in such a horrible way and then you had to come to me and tell me all about it and I reacted…" John stopped and shook his head. "Then if that wasn't bad enough, you had to walk in on me with that asshole. I couldn't believe what I had done once the alcohol wore off. I mean, sleeping with Dwayne? I wouldn't have touched him with anybody's dick!"

Randy laughed and shook his head. "That's disgusting, John."

"I can't take back what I did, Ran. I will regret it for the rest of my life. I own up to the fact that I deliberately tried to hurt you and I am sorry. I know you never wanted to hurt me by what you did. I know you would never have cheated on me had you been sober. It took me a long time to realize that but it was mostly because I didn't want to admit it to myself. Admitting that to myself meant acknowledging that I did what I did with Dwayne out of spite and I never thought I could be capable of doing that. Especially to you," John shrugged. "Maybe you should be the one asking if I'm a good husband to you. Am I really what you want when you think of the person you wanna spend the rest of your life with?"

Randy slowly stood up from his chair and walked over to John's. He rested his body on John's leg and smiled as he lowered his lips to press a soft kiss onto John's lips. "Absolutely,"

John clutched Randy's hips and pulled him in closer, deepening the kiss and mentally thanking God he was still able to have his husband in his arms.

**A/N: So, all seems well, right? REVIEW...**


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Sorry for the long wait, guys! I am on vaca! **

Randy walked into the designated men's locker room of the arena the night's show would be held in, his bag and John's dragging behind him. He smiled and greeted his other co-workers who had already arrived. Spotting his closest friend at the far end, Randy tugged the bags after him and headed for the younger man. "What's up, Teddy?"

Ted looked up and smiled, his eyes drifting down to the bags Randy carried. "Hey, Ran. I see things are still going well at home."

Randy's smile widened and he nodded. "Yeah, they are. It's been almost a month since we agreed to work things out and so far, so good."

Ted's smile wavered and he looked down. "I'm really happy for you guys, Ran…"

Randy raised an eyebrow and nodded. "Sounds like there's a but coming."

Ted quickly shook his head. "Where's John? Is he here yet?"

Randy frowned at the sudden change in conversation and motioned towards the door. "Yeah, he's outside. You know how John is. He can't ever just walk directly into the locker room. He gets distracted by everyone around him." He laughed and shrugged. "Why do you care?"

"He's gonna find out about your match tonight," replied Ted softly. Randy's frown returned and he stared at Ted. "So? Who am I facing tonight?"

Ted bit his lip and mumbled, "Cody,"

Randy's eyes widened and he quickly shook his head. "No, I'm not! That makes no sense…we don't have a storyline together…there's no point to it."

"Calm down, Ran. I think they're gonna start a Cody/Randy storyline with the whole student becomes the teacher sort of shit," replied Ted. He shrugged sadly and looked over Randy's shoulder to ensure no one was near. "You know it had to be a possibility at one point, Ran. No one knows what happened between you and Cody so you can't expect Vince to be sympathetic to you not wanting to work with him. Maybe you should talk to Hunter and get him to convince Vince to go another direction."

Randy shook his head, his eyes on the ground. "No, I can't do that. This situation is horrible enough as it is without adding the humiliation of Hunter knowing, too. I don't want anyone to know what happened with Cody and John made it clear he didn't want anyone to know. He knows how fast it'll spread around here." He sighed and lifted his head. "Fuck my life, man. Just when things were getting better with John…this is gonna piss him off."

"Ran, this isn't your fault! You didn't ask for this so how could he get pissed off at you?" Ted rolled his eyes and stood up, his ring gear in hand.

"I don't mean he's gonna get pissed at me. He's just gonna get pissed off in general and it's gonna ruin his night." Randy also stood and lifted John's bag to the locker besides his. He lifted his own bag up and opened it, trying to distract his mind with picking what color trunks to wear. "My whole night is ruined now, too."

"Ran, I know this stinks but just explain it to John. You can't chose who your matches are gonna be against around here. At one point, you're gonna have to face the one you hate. John should know that by now." Ted shrugged and proceeded to get dressed.

"It's not just about John, Teddy. I don't want to be in the ring with Cody. Hell, I don't want to be on the same planet as Cody!" Randy rolled his eyes and angrily grabbed a pair of trunks. "This is so frustrating."

Just as Ted opened his mouth to respond, the door to the locker room banged open. Ted groaned inwardly and mumbled, "Speak of the devil,"

Randy turned over and sighed inwardly when he saw Cody coming his way. He turned around quickly, giving the younger man his back, as he continued pulling out his wrestling gear.

"By all means, ignore me now as much as you want but we do have a match tonight and I would like to go over it. I don't want to end up getting accidentally hurt out there," Cody's voice dripped with sarcasm and it made Randy glare at him out of the corner of his eye. "If I was gonna hurt you, Cody, it wouldn't be in the ring. I would hurt you, for real, where no one could stop me."

Cody smirked and crossed his arms over his chest. "Keep telling yourself that."

"Codes, what don't you just wait for Randy outside? There's no point in this right now. Things are bad enough," Ted raised an eyebrow at his young friend and stared at him pointedly.

Cody dropped the smirk and sighed. "Fine, but if he doesn't come out, I'm coming back in!"

"What are you; 5? Just get the fuck away from me already!" snapped Randy, clenching his fists tightly.

Cody's eyes widened and he took a step forward but Ted stepped in between him and Randy. "Enough. You're both my friends and I'm not gonna let either of you get fined or suspended because of some backstage fight. You're both grown men! Act like it!"

"Just keep him away from me, Ted," mumbled Randy as he turned away once more. Cody smiled and winked at Ted. "I'll give him 10 minutes."

Cody turned and walked away but stopped short as the locker room door opened one more time. His smile grew as he locked eyes with John and he looked the man up and down, noting how he instantly tensed. "Super Cena. How's it hanging?"

John frowned, surprised Cody was speaking to him. The younger man had avoided him for months now after he had beaten him to a bloody pulp and left him on his hotel room floor. It seemed that was over now as Cody stood before him with a giant smile and a wicked look in his eyes.

"Cat got your tongue, Johnny?" Cody shrugged. "Well, don't worry. I'm sure it'll loosen up in a bit after Randy tells you of his match tonight."

John's frown deepened and he suddenly found his voice. "What the fuck are you talking about?"

Cody took a step closer to John, his smile shifting into a smirk. "Remember when you told me I better never put my hands on Randy again? Looks like I'm gonna have to tonight and you can damn sure bet I'm gonna enjoy it." He winked at John and stepped around him, exiting the room.

John stood, stunned and listened to the door close behind Cody. His eyes scanned the room for Randy and saw him talking to Ted at the end of the large locker room. Before he realized it, his feet began carrying him in that direction.

Randy looked up from Ted's soft spoken lecture about how he should learn to ignore Cody at the sound of footsteps. His heart began to race as he saw John approach but he tried to push away his nerves and smiled at the older man. "Hey, babe."

"Why the hell did I just have an encounter with that shit stain Cody?" asked John, ignoring both Ted's presence and Randy's greeting.

Randy frowned. "He actually spoke to you?"

John scoffed and crossed his arms over his chest. "Yeah, he actually spoke to me. He looked like a kid in a fucking candy store and gladly told me he was gonna be all over you tonight."

Randy slowly nodded. "Unfortunately, that's true. They scheduled us for a match together tonight."

John clenched his jaw tightly and shook his head, his hands dropping to his sides and clenching into fists. "I can't fucking believe this."

"Johnny…" began Randy, taking a step closer to him but John cut him off and pointed at the next locker. "Is that my bag?"

Randy frowned and nodded. "Yeah. Why?"

John moved forward and grabbed the bag, yanking it out of the locker. "I'm moving to another locker. I can't be around you right now."

Randy's eyes widened and his hand shot out to grab John's arm as he made to move away. "Are you serious? You're pissed off at me for something I can't control? You know damn well I didn't ask to be in a match with Cody."

John glared at Randy before moving his eyes down to where his husband gripped his arm. "Let me go, Randy."

Randy stared at John silently for a few more seconds, expecting him to come to his senses. He finally let go of his arm when he saw no softening of the glare that was on him and took a step back. "Cody said what he said to you to get a rise out of you, John and you're just gonna give into it. I can't believe you."

"And I can't believe that of all the men in this world you chose the most annoying motherfucker walking the planet to stick your dick inside," responded John angrily before stalking away to a locker on the opposite side of Randy's.

Randy watched him go and waited for the anger to overwhelm him and make him follow John and demand an explanation for his harshness. It never came, though. The only feeling overwhelming him was a mixture of pain and disappointment. He turned to look at Ted, who had sat by quietly during the altercation.

"I'm sorry you had to see that, Teddy. You're always stuck in the middle of my crazy shit." Randy shook his head and sat down beside his friend. "I must make your life very stressful. I'm a shitty friend."

Ted laughed and wrapped an arm around Randy's shoulders. "You're a great friend, Ran and you actually make my life very interesting."

Randy smiled and opened his mouth to answer when a yell from the doorway startled him.

"I'm not gonna wait all day, Orton! Let's get a move on. Dying to get in that ring!"

Randy sighed at the sound of Cody's voice and his eyes instantly looked over at John, who slammed a shirt down in frustration. He moved his eyes to the ground and closed them tightly, praying that what was turning into one of his worst nights would quickly end.

* * *

John walked back into the locker room after his shower, the scowl still planted on his face not inviting any conversation. He quickly slid on some shorts and a t-shirt and was sliding his feet into sneakers when a shadow fell over him. His eyes moved up the body and landed on Ted's face, a similar scowl looking back at him.

"What do you want?"

Ted shook his head and remained standing before him. "To tell you how disappointed I am in you."

John rolled his eyes. "Oh no. Now I won't be able to sleep at nights." He lowered his eyes back down to his sneakers and continued tying them.

"Sarcasm, John? That's real nice. I hope the sarcasm keeps you company because you're about 5 seconds from finding yourself all alone."

John looked up and Ted once more and leaned back. "Look, Ted, what do you want from me? It's obvious you're Team Randy, OK. You're sticking up for your buddy and you're obligated to not like me. I don't need a lecture, though."

Ted quickly held up his hands. "I'm not trying to lecture you, John. I'm trying to get you to realize what you're doing." He frowned down at the older man. "Don't you realize how much you hurt Randy today? You got angry at him and damn near blamed him for something he had no control over."

"Oh, he had control over it! You're telling me he couldn't have gone into Hunter's office and tried to get out of that fucking match? He knows Hunter would've done it! Hunter would do anything for him," replied John angrily.

Ted nodded down at him. "You're right; he could've done that but he didn't for you. Hunter would've wanted to know why he didn't want the match with Cody and Randy would've had to tell him what's happened. You made it clear to him, though, that you didn't want anyone knowing what happened; that you didn't want your relationship and its troubles to become locker room gossip. Randy's just trying to respect your wishes, John."

John looked away and shook his head. "He could've tried…he could've made up another excuse."

Ted sighed and sat down in the empty locker besides John's. "John, don't you see how much Randy is trying? He was so excited when he came in this afternoon and the minute he found out about his match, all he did was worry about your reaction. He never thought you would get mad at him; he just worried that you would get mad, period. His concern for you is doubled, tripled even, over his concern for himself. All you're thinking about right now is how **you** feel about Cody and Randy being in the ring together and being forced to touch again but imagine how Randy feels about that! He's the one who deserves some concern right now. Randy must feel horrible right now. He hates Cody because of what he did to him and, if given a choice, do you really believe he wants that little snot touching him again?"

John remained silent and closed his eyes, hoping Ted would get the hint and leave him alone.

"Randy was damned either way from the moment he walked in here today. If he told Hunter why he didn't want to face Cody, you would've gotten pissed at him so he didn't and decided to go through with the match and you still got pissed at him." Ted laughed and finally stood up. "You know, I don't know why Randy is trying so hard with you. He can't ever win with you. At this point, I think he's better off alone or with someone else. You're not good for him, Cena."

John's eyes slowly opened as he heard Ted's retreating footsteps. He groaned inwardly as he stood and zipped up his bag, the younger man's words bouncing around in his head on a repeat loop.

The locker room door opened and John's eyes swung that way, expecting to see Ted coming back for another lecture but instead saw his friend, Matt, heading his way.

"What's up, bro? You ready to go? Randy asked me to give you a ride back to the hotel," Matt smiled sheepishly and shook his head. "Well, more like told me to. Randy's a scary bro when he wants to be."

"Especially when you keep calling him bro," mumbled John as he lifted his bag. A sudden clench of his stomach made him reach for it and he dropped the bag. "Where is Randy?"

"I left him in the parking lot," replied Matt, bending to pick up John's fallen bag.

John felt a sudden rise of panic and headed for the locker room door. "Gimme a few minutes, OK," He didn't bother to wait for Matt's response as he broke into a run, heading for the garage.

As he burst into the cool night, he scanned the large garage crowded by WWE production trucks, buses and rental cars for Randy's car. People leaving for the night and staff packing up equipment shot goodbyes his way but John ignored them all, moving forward around the vehicles until he finally spotted the rental Randy had chosen for them that morning. He jogged towards it when he saw Randy already in the driver's seat and slammed his hand on the back window when he approached. Randy spun around, his eyes wide and watched as John walked closer to his window.

John pulled open the driver's side door and bent down out of breath. "Don't go,"

Randy watched John try to catch his breath before turning away. "I have to. I'm gonna stay in another room tonight and I arranged for Zack or Matt, whatever the hell his name is, to take you back to the hotel. Go find him,"

"I know. He found me and told me but I don't want to go with him. I want to go back with you." John reached his hand forward and took one of Randy's, holding it tightly when he felt him tugging it away. "I was an asshole earlier. I was angry at the situation and I took it out on you. You didn't deserve that. This has been a shitty night for both of us but for no one more than you. I know you want Cody around you about as much as I want him around you. I'm sorry, Ran."

Randy maintained his stare forward and let his hand lay limply in John's grasp. "I don't want any more apologies, John. I want there to be no fights so the apologies don't have to follow."

"I know you do; so do I! I was just a dumbass today and I forgot it all." John shook his head and squeezed Randy's hand, willing his husband to turn over and look at him. "Please forgive me and let's go back together. Don't let this ruin all we've fixed in the past couple of weeks."

Randy finally turned over and stared into John's hopeful eyes. "How many times am I gonna have to forgive you, John? I get that we're married and with that does come my love and it's unconditional. I accept you and love you the way you are but, damn you make it hard sometimes. Is it supposed to be this hard?"

John's eyes lowered and he shrugged, pulling his hand away. "Aren't the best things in life the hardest things; the things you have to fight for?"

"How much more can we fight, John? After a while, it gets kinda ridiculous." Randy sighed and turned away once more. "Not to mention exhausting. You start to wonder if it's really worth it."

John took a deep breath. "Randy, please…"

"Bro, I'm exhausted. How much longer do you want me to wait?"

John turned over and glared at Matt for interrupting him, the younger man subconsciously taking a step back. "Go sit in the car and give me a fucking minute."

Matt nodded and quickly walked off, dragging his and John's bag after him. John watched him go before turning his attention back to Randy. "Baby, please. I know I'm an asshole to you sometimes but I love you so fucking much. I know you love me, too so that means our marriage is worth fighting for!"

Randy nodded. "OK, then. Let's see a little fight from you now because I'm exhausted and I'm leaving." He reached next to John and tugged on the door, causing John to stumble and stand. "Wait, no! You can't just go like this, Randy!"

Randy groaned and nodded. "Yes, I can. I'm exhausted; physically and mentally. I just want sleep. You need to go, too. You have that kid waiting for you like a lapdog. I'll see you when I see you."

John frowned at Randy's dismissal and knew it came from his hurt feelings. He took a deep breath and stepped back, letting Randy slam the door shut. Before the younger man could start the car, though, John pulled open the back door and slid into the backseat. Randy spun around and widened his eyes. "What the hell are you doing?"

"I'm fighting but this time, I'm fighting the right way. I'm not letting you run away and I'm not gonna act like this didn't happen. We're in this marriage together and we're never going to be apart again because of a fight." John shrugged. "So, it's up to you. We either stay here all night or you drive to the hotel and if you don't let me in our room, I'll just sleep outside in front of the door. Either way, you're not getting rid of me."

Randy stared at John, his forehead now creased by a frown. "Are you fucking crazy? Do you have any idea how upset I still am? Is this funny to you?"

John leaned forward between the two front seats. "I know how upset you are. It's written all over your face and it's killing me because I was the one that put that look there. I hate myself right now but I would hate myself even more if I let you go. I need to fix this because I can't stand the idea of being without you for even one night, Randy."

Randy rolled his eyes and turned around, starting the car's engine. He pointed the car out of the garage and quickly drove away as John relaxed in the back seat, a small smile on his face.

**A/N: Just when things had gotten calm...REVIEW!**


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: Quick update because it's raining and I'm in a writing mood. I decided to add some more of Cody and Ted in this chapter, as I will with Dwayne in a future chapter because I think it's important to see things from their eyes for a bit, too. It also adds drama and allows me to play with other characters. I love Cody and Ted in this chapter and playing around with their dynamic. Hope you do, too. **

Cody exited the bathroom after spending almost an hour under the hot stream of water. He had waited around until he saw John run out of the locker room before entering, his mood no longer up for goading the older man due to the aches and pains. Despite how much he thought he would be brutalized by Randy in the ring, he hadn't been. Randy had treated their match like any other match and executed it perfectly, laying him out with an RKO, as planned and not even giving his neck an extra tweak. Cody had been partly surprised to walk out of the ring with no more aches than usual but soon got over it. He should've known Randy wouldn't lose control. Control was Randy's middle name and it took a lot to break it. Not even hatred would, apparently.

Cody stood in front of his locker and pulled out some clothes. As he laid them out on the empty bench in front of the locker, he heard the door open behind him and turned over to see who else was still around. A small sigh escaped him when he saw Ted walking over to him. "God, what do you want? Don't you have a family to go home to?"

Ted rolled his eyes and sat on the bench besides Cody's clothes. "Yes, I do actually but I'm making them wait so I could talk to you. Don't make me regret that decision, Codes."

"Oh, I'm sure I won't. You love spending time with me and don't deny it." Cody smiled and dropped the towel around his waist, immediately noticing Ted's eyes lower to scan his naked lower half. "Want me to wait a bit before I start getting dressed? I don't mind,"

Ted's face quickly reddened and he moved his eyes back up to lock onto Cody's. "Don't say things like that and just get dressed, will you?"

Cody laughed and shook his head, sliding into his underwear and jeans. "Don't act so shy, Teddy. There was a time you were begging to see me naked and I was telling you no. Now that I'm telling you to look, you might as well take advantage."

"Cody, just stop it. That was a lifetime ago," replied Ted softly.

Cody's smile softened and he sat next to Ted, after putting on a t-shirt to make the older man finally look calm. "OK, ok. I get it. Now you're a family man, aren't you?"

Ted nodded, his foot beginning a nervous tap on the ground. "Yes, I am. I still care for you, though, as a friend. I worry about you, Cody."

Cody shrugged and turned over slightly, his hand brushing over Ted's thigh and resting there. "I'm fine, Ted. Why do you worry about me?"

Ted ignored the sensation Cody's touch had on him and licked his lips. "Codes, what you did to Randy and John today was uncalled for. Haven't you done enough to hurt their marriage? Why can't you just leave them be?"

Cody's eyes widened and his hand moved over to his chest. "Me? I haven't done anything to their marriage! Randy was the one who came to me that night and threw himself at me! He was the married one, not me!"

Ted sighed and shook his head. "This situation is so sad, Cody but what's even sadder is that you actually believe what you're saying! One day you're gonna realize what you did to Randy and you're gonna hate yourself. You're so blinded by it now that you can't see it. Why can't you just admit you took advantage of a situation, of a man you wanted but who never wanted you back, and ask for his forgiveness now? It's gonna be too late one day, Cody! Don't let it get to that day!"

Cody stared at Ted blankly and shook his head. "Look, Ted, I know you're all into your religion now and forgiveness is a big deal but I don't have to ask anyone for forgiveness because I didn't do anything. Stop pushing this because all you're gonna do is make me hate you, too." He frowned and stood up, beginning to pace the empty room. "You're making it seem like I raped Randy or something. He may have been a little under the influence but let's be clear, I asked him if he wanted to do it and he told me yes very coherently. He was the one who threw me down on the bed and fucked me despite me bringing up John! He was very aware of his marriage and that it wasn't John in the bed with him! Randy knew what he was doing and who he was doing it with, Ted so stop making him out to be so damn innocent."

"Cody, it may have seemed that way to you but he couldn't have been. Could it be that you just remember it that way because you wanted it so badly? I know how you felt about Randy," replied Ted. He stood up and placed himself in the direction of Cody's pacing, blocking him from moving further. "I know how you still feel for him. This act you put on may work for him but not for me. I see how much you still want him and I know you would give anything to be the one with Randy. You would like nothing more than to see John leave him and open the path for you."

Cody smirked and shook his head. "Wrong, Teddy. I already got what I wanted from Randy that night. I wasn't ever looking for a relationship with him. I just wanted his cock."

Ted laughed and shook his head. "Fine, Cody. Keep telling yourself that and maybe one day you'll believe it as much as you believe you didn't take advantage of Randy that night." He turned around and started to move away but Cody quickly grabbed his arm and tugged him back. Ted found himself pressed against Cody's front and raised his hands up to push himself away. Cody only held him tightly, his arms wrapped around Ted's waist and his hands pressing against his lower back. "When did you stop looking at me the way you used to, Teddy? I loved how I saw myself in your eyes. You trusted me so much…you loved me so much."

Ted inhaled sharply at Cody's whisper, the younger man's breath tickling his lips. He moved his head away and shook it. "Things changed, Cody. You changed."

"No, I haven't. You're the one who changed. You went off and married that chic and knocked her up…I don't understand how you could've done that," Cody frowned, his voice laced with anger and Ted turned back over with a shrug of his shoulders. "What did you expect me to do, Cody? You expected me to wait around for you while you were off trying to get the attention of a man who never saw you as more than a friend; a man who went off and married the man he actually did love? I loved you and I was offering you the world but you didn't want me; you wanted Randy."

Ted laughed and pushed himself out of Cody's embrace, making the younger man's eyes widen as he stumbled back. "I may not be completely over you, Cody but I'm getting closer and closer every day. I found happiness and Randy has found happiness. You're the one who's all alone now, still chasing after something he's never going to get. I feel sorry for you, Cody."

Cody's eyes narrowed and he glared at Ted from where he stood. "Ask me how much I care what you feel for me, Ted. I've never cared about your feelings for me. I never cared about what you offered me, either. You actually thought I would see you as more than jobber one day." He laughed and shook his head. "I feel sorry for you, Ted."

Ted smiled sadly and nodded. "I hope you get what you're looking for one day, Cody." He turned and exited the room, letting the door close silently behind him. Ted took a deep breath and headed out to the parking lot, shaking his head slightly. "Karma is gonna kick that kid's ass."

* * *

Randy pushed the door to his and John's hotel room open, the same scowl still planted on his face despite the near half an hour drive from the arena to the hotel. He looked at John move past him, the same goofy smile still on his face, and rolled his eyes. John seemed determined to ignore his anger but Randy wasn't planning on staying awake long enough to see him do it.

"I'm gonna have to buy Matt some lunch tomorrow or something. Not only did you terrify him earlier but then I drove the poor kid crazy and let's face it, he doesn't have far to go." John laughed at his own joke and dropped his bag on the ground. He had texted Matt from the back of Randy's car and told him to head on back on his own but to leave his bag with the front desk. Matt had done as commanded without so much as a complaint only serving to make John feel even guiltier about how he had treated his friend.

"I'm going to sleep," Randy ignored John's attempt to start a conversation and took off his clothes, dropping them on the chair next to the desk. He slid into the large king-size bed and wrapped the covers around him, covering himself from head to toe in an effort to block not only the light but John.

John sighed when he saw Randy bury himself in bed. He shook his head and turned off the main light in the room, leaving only the small lamp on the desk lit. He knew Randy wasn't going to let him off the look for his earlier dramatics but he expected them to talk before going to sleep. John stared at the lump in the bed as he slowly dropped his clothes onto the chair on top of Randy's. He moved over to the bed slowly and climbed in, unsure of whether he should try to move closer to Randy or just let him be for the night. John bit his lip anxiously and drummed his fingers on his stomach. The glint of his wedding band as it caught the light instantly provided the decision for him and he turned over, scooting as close to Randy's back as he could. Before the younger man could protest, John wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled him close so his back touched John's front.

Randy's eyes snapped open and he quickly tried to move John's hand off his stomach. "What the hell are you doing? Get off me,"

"No, I'm not. I want you to listen to me. Don't talk, just listen to me." John held tight to Randy, not allowing him to escape. "I am so sorry for how I reacted earlier. All I could think of at that moment was how sick I felt at the thought of Cody touching you. The thought made me furious. You were so calm about it, though. That made me angrier. I thought it meant you had forgiven Cody and excused what he did to you. I was so stupid, though. I know there's no way you could ever forget what Cody did to you or forgive him for it, especially when the snot doesn't even show remorse for it. I realize now that you were just being calm for my sake. You were worrying about me and not about yourself and I did the same when I should've been worrying about you because I know it had to be torture for you to let him touch you again. I know if you could you would've asked Hunter to get you out of it but you didn't for me. You were so considerate with me and respecting my wishes and you put yourself and your feelings on the back burner and I hate myself for making you do that, baby. You're such a good man, such a good husband and you love me and I'm such an asshole and I don't deserve you. Ted is right,"

Randy felt his eyes water slightly at John's words but frowned when he heard Ted's name mentioned. He opened his lips to respond but shut them when he felt John's lips graze the back of his neck.

"I'll keep apologizing until I'm blue in the face, Ran or until you tell me to shut up. I'll walk over hot coals, I'll do car pool with Ally and all the kids for the whole school year, I'll get "I'm an asshole" tattooed on my ass, I'll do anything, baby. Please, forgive me. I love you so much and even if I don't deserve you, I can't give you up. I need you in my life; we're a family. You're the only person I need in my life to survive, Randy. I can't even breathe without you," John pressed his face to Randy's back, his heart racing. He clutched at Randy's hips, desperately trying to get him to respond.

Randy couldn't take anymore of John's pleas and slowly turned over. John's watery eyes stared back at him and he moved his hands up to cup the older man's face. "Ted told you that you didn't deserve me?"

John nodded, his eyes lowering before mumbling, "He's right,"

Randy smiled and shook his head, running a finger over John's lips to draw his attention back on him. "He's not right. Don't ever believe that. We're perfect for each other, Johnny. We're both assholes at times and we both make the stupidest mistakes. Despite it all, we've made an amazing family together; one we were looking forward to growing."

John's eyes widened and he pulled Randy's hand down from his face, holding it against his chest tightly. "We are still looking forward to that, aren't we?"

"Of course, baby," Randy's smile wavered slightly. "As long as we fix everything. We're down to 6 months now."

John frowned. "What are you talking about? The baby died so our timeline doesn't still stand."

"Oh, yes it does." Randy sighed and let his head fall back onto his pillow. "John, I love you with all my heart and I forgive you for that scene this morning. I expect you one day to stop making scenes like that but I know it's gonna take time. I know when Dwayne walks back into my sight it's gonna take most of the locker room to hold me back from wanting to launch myself at him and snapping his neck in half. I'm gonna be pissed and I may flip out on you because of that anger. My goal is not to, though because I know you're sorry and that you regret what you did with him. I'm trying to accept that and continue learning to move on so we could start new and I need you to do the same. That timeline may have been set because the baby was coming but now it's taken a whole new meaning. I want us to learn how to live with what the other did without anger and resentment for each other and I think we're on the right path for it. Of course there are gonna be setbacks but I think in 6 months we should have it mostly under control and know if this relationship is gonna make it. We may not be doing it for a new baby now but we're doing it for each other and for the family we already have at home." He turned over and looked at John. "If we're still fighting and at each other's throats in 6 months, this marriage is over. I will file the paperwork and tell our families. I won't live the rest of my life with us acting the way we're acting now; despite how much I may love you."

John took a deep breath and slowly nodded. "OK, I understand and I agree. We have 6 months left to learn to work out our problems and how to move on from them." He smiled and pulled Randy back in for an embrace, burying his face in his neck. "We're gonna make it, baby. We're gonna be just fine, you'll see."

Randy pulled back slightly. "I hope so. I need you in my life to survive too, Johnny." He brushed his lips against John's and felt the older man pull him tighter against him before deepening the kiss. John's licked Randy's lips, moaning inwardly when he felt them part. He slipped his tongue inside Randy's mouth slowly, feeling the younger man start to kiss back. John groaned and grabbed Randy's face in his hands, pulling his face towards him, their lips still joined, warm and soft. Randy pressed up against him, throwing his arms around John's neck and allowing their tongues to caress. He moved his hands down John's body and stroked his strong back gently. John ran his hands up, running them through Randy's short hair, their tongues intertwined, then slid his hands down Randy's back to enjoy the feel of his toned back muscles.

Randy pulled away from the kiss but kept his body pressed close to John's, a small smirk on his face. "That was really nice. Can I go to sleep now?"

John's eyes widened and he moved Randy's hand down to his crotch, letting him feel his growing bulge. "Are you kidding me? Does it feel like little Johnny is gonna let you sleep right now?"

Randy laughed and continued stroking John softly. "Nothing little about this guy, baby. Doesn't matter, though. I'm still going to sleep."

John groaned as Randy placed a final, quick kiss on his lips and turned over. He took a couple of deep breaths, trying to calm his raging hormones and shut off the light, deciding he may as well make himself comfortable and try to get some sleep, as well. John's eyes soon grew accustomed to the darkness of the room and he was able to make out Randy's back and shoulders as they rose and fell with each breath he took. A small smile came upon his face and he pulled his body close to his husbands, enjoying the feel of having him beside him after the fear of almost losing him once more until he finally fell to asleep too.

**A/N: OK, so let me know what you think by REVIEWING!** **Thanks so much to those that already do. I love reading what you have to say!**


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: So sorry for the long wait in update, guys. I have been on vacation and trying to give my family my full attention. I have been dying to write, though and taking notes so really excited to be back!**

"So, I hear things have gotten interesting on the road. I'm sure you're very happy to be home now," Dr. Adams took his usual position at his chair across from the sofa where John and Randy sat, looking back at him. "Why don't we discuss what happened?"

John groaned and shook his head. "Why do we need to discuss it? Randy and I made up. We fixed it on our own. I don't want to bring it up again."

"Well, John, what if it happens again? I think discussing it and exploring the reason behind why it happened in the first place is the key to ensuring it's truly resolved and not going to come up again." Dr. Adams shrugged as he looked back and forth between both men. "Up to you, though,"

"I fucked up, OK!" John rolled his eyes and sighed loudly. "I flipped out when I found out Cody and Randy were gonna be in a match together and I took it out on Randy even though I knew he didn't have a say in the matter. I was horrible to him for no reason but he still forgave me. I swore to him I wouldn't do it again and I intend on keeping that promise so there's no reason to talk about it."

Dr. Adams raised an eyebrow and looked over at Randy, who sat quietly besides John. "Do you agree that it's resolved and should therefore be over?"

Randy shrugged. "I guess. I made it clear that we only have 6 months left to fix our marriage and his going crazy over things like that weren't helping. He realized he made a mistake and I accepted his apology."

"Were you angry he got upset in the first place, Randy?"

Randy rolled his eyes at the doctor's question. "What do you think? Of course I was! He was blaming me for something I had no control over and completely ignoring that I was upset about it, too. It not only pissed me off; it hurt me."

John lowered his head and groaned softly. Randy shot him a sideways glance and sighed softly in frustration. "I have to answer the doctor's questions, John,"

"I know. I just hate having to go over it again. I hate hearing you say that I hurt you and I hate the fact that I fucking hurt you in the first place." John lifted his head and moved it to lie back on the sofa. "I just wish I could turn back time and not have done what I did."

"Unfortunately, that's just not possible, John." Dr. Adams smiled over at both men. "What is possible, however, is to work on thinking clearly and talking about things calmly before something hurtful is said." He turned his gaze over at Randy. "Have you really forgiven John?"

"Yes," answered Randy quickly. He held up a hand when he saw the doctor open his mouth for a rebuttal. "I know what you're gonna say. You think I haven't and that I'm holding it in and will grow to resent John one day. Trust me, I have forgiven him. I also really think it's a mistake he won't be repeating."

Randy smiled and looked over at John, who had a miserable expression on his face. "John thinks he's so in control of everything. I'm a control freak but so is he; just in a different way. He's thinks he's not allowed to show bad judgment and make bad calls. Sometimes I think he lets his Super Cena persona of the WWE take over and he beats himself up when he makes a normal, human mistake. He doesn't get that one of the reasons I fell in love with him was because he wasn't as perfect as his damn character made him out to be." He shrugged and looked back towards the doctor. "He fucked up. He didn't think about things before he just acted on them. I can't judge him for that because I've done that more times than I can count during our life together. I may still do it again one day. I was upset by what he did but I am able to really forgive him because I know in my heart he didn't mean to hurt me."

"I would never willingly hurt you, Ran. I'm so sorry," whispered John from where he sat.

"I know and I already forgave you so stop apologizing," Randy raised an eyebrow over at John. "However, if it does happen again, then we're gonna have some issues."

"It won't be happening again!" responded John quickly, a small laugh escaping him. He looked over at Dr. Adams, who watched them silently. "When Randy and I made our mistakes, we chose men who we're gonna have to see almost every day because we work with them. It's gonna prove for a lot of awkward situations, unfortunately. As much fun as it was to kick Cody's ass when I found out about him and Ran, it didn't change the fact it happened and that I'm gonna have to see him almost every fucking day and that Randy is on the road with him while I'm miles away and that I was gonna have to learn to accept that."

John looked over at Randy and nodded. "I thought I had figured it all out until a couple nights ago. I thought I had come to terms with it and started moving forward. I realized I didn't, though the minute I heard Cody was going to be able to place even one finger on Randy. I hated that at that moment I actually shared something with Cody and that something was that he had been just as intimate with Randy as I have been." He shrugged and looked down at the floor. "I trust Randy with all my heart when he's on the road; I always have and I still do. I know what really happened between Randy and Cody and I know it won't happen again. That's not my issue. My issue is, how do I get over this anger I have for Cody and not take it out on Randy any more? Cody's not going anywhere; I'm gonna have to see him and I don't want to react to seeing him in the way I did ever again."

Dr. Adams nodded. "I'm glad you've been able to pinpoint that, John. I really believe it all comes down to forgiveness. You've been able to forgive Randy for his transgression and you have to let that take precedence over your anger for Cody." He shrugged and smiled. "Cody is nothing. He's only significant to your relationship with Randy if **you** give him that power. Forget him. Don't give him the power to have any control over your feelings. In essence, what I'm asking you to do is forgive him as well."

John wrinkled his nose. "He's such a little shit stain, though, Doc. He's truly one of the most obnoxious people God ever plopped down on this earth. It would be easier for me to just keep beating the shit out of him every time I see him."

Dr. Adams smiled. "Easier but not healthier." He raised an eyebrow. "Come on; if he's such a little shit stain, why would you even bother with him? He's not worth your time, John. He had one night with Randy while you have a lifetime with him. Randy doesn't love him, he loves you and I'm sure Cody knows that. Let him live with the knowledge that the night he had with Randy was only a mistake but the life Randy has with you is real and wonderful."

"I agree," Randy added. "Johnny, giving Cody even a second more of your time and attention is only hurting you inside, not him. It's gonna eat you away and torture you while he goes on happily along his way. Forget him and let's just concentrate on us."

John slowly nodded, a smile coming upon his lips. "You're right and I promise to work on it. Can you follow doc's and your own advice, though?"

Randy bit his lip and shrugged. "I don't know but I know I plan on trying. Last thing I want is either Dwayne or Brock to get the best of me. I want them to see us standing together, happily and last time I checked, so did you."

"I do. That's still my plan, Randy. We're gonna face them together." John's smile widened. "Can we kinda face Cody together from now on, too? That might help."

Randy nodded, a small smile on his face, too. "No problem, babe. Whatever it takes,"

"Uh, excuse me?"

Both Randy and John turned over to look at Dr. Adams, who frowned back at them and asked, "Can we specify who are Dwayne and Brock? I can't seem to find it in my notes,"

"Dwayne is the person John…" Randy trailed off and rolled his eyes. "Did you know what with and Brock is the guy who gave me the stuff that messed me up the night I slept with Cody. I'm sure you've seen them on TV or heard about them."

Dr. Adams wrote down the information Randy gave him and nodded. "What's the situation with them? Are they around as much as Cody is?"

John shook his head and began to tap his foot anxiously on the floor, growing uncomfortable with the conversation now that it was turning over to him some. "No, not as much. Dwayne is off making movies most of the time. He barely comes back to the wrestling world unless offered millions of dollars and the ability to plug a new movie." He rolled his eyes before continuing. "Brock left us years ago and only just returned this year. His contract calls for very few appearances and matches so we shouldn't see him a lot either. Unfortunately for us, though, both men are scheduled to appear again a couple of times on TV and we know it's going to be incredibly uncomfortable."

"I can imagine," replied Dr. Adams. "Have you and Randy discussed how to deal with the feelings it's sure to bring up?"

John shrugged. "We kinda have. Randy's worried about how he's gonna react to Dwayne. I mean, he has the same anger for him that I have for Cody. He's also uncomfortable around Brock now, obviously since that was a man he called a friend and he betrayed him so badly," He stopped and looked over at Randy from the corner of his eye. "I'm worried about seeing Brock, too. As much as I hate Cody, I think I hate Brock more. I hate what he did to Randy and what he did to us."

John looked back at the doctor. "Dwayne I don't give two shits about. I told him the day after we had our thing that it was a one-night thing. I told him I pretty much used him for a night because of my anger over Randy. He shouldn't expect much from me and we've never been friends so my plan to stay away from him should pan out."

"Let's put Dwayne on the back burner for now and concentrate on Brock. He's the man who Randy says gave him the drugs that impaired his judgment and caused him to have an affair. Do you worry about him coming back? Do you think it could happen again?" asked Dr. Adams, his gaze firmly planted on John.

Just as John opened his mouth to answer, he felt Randy slide forward in his seat.

"What exactly do you mean by 'Randy says gave him the drugs'? I don't just say it; I mean it! The way I said it happened is exactly how it happened!" Randy glared at the doctor, clenching his jaw tightly.

Dr. Adams held up a hand. "Relax, Randy. I'm just playing devil's advocate here."

John quickly reached for Randy's hand and squeezed it comfortingly. "It's OK, baby. I know what really happened." He shook his head at the doctor. "I can honestly say that thought never entered my mind, Doc. I know in my heart that Randy would never willingly go back to the life he had years ago when his only relationship was with the drugs in his pocket."

"So, it wouldn't bother you if Randy chose to forgive Brock and resume a friendship with him?"

John frowned at the doctor. "I don't think he would but if he did it would be his choice. I've never told Randy who to be friends with and who not to be. I think he's smart enough to do that on his own." He sighed and looked back at Randy, who still seemed on the verge of getting up and walking out the door. "Look, Doc, I never liked Brock. We all came up together and we hung out, had a few beers and shared a few meals. We traveled together and roomed together. I was always cordial to the man but there was something I just couldn't place my finger on. It took me years to do so but when I finally did, there was nothing Brock could do to prove me wrong. If anything, he kept proving me right."

John shrugged and turned over to Randy. "Ran knows this; I've told him. Brock is a screw up. He has a big head and thinks he knows everything. It goes beyond cocky and conceited. He likes being in the big time but hates putting the effort into it. Partying is more fun and he likes to do it. He has this infectious attitude that gets people to think like him and be like him and before you know it, you're throwing your career down the drain like him. Randy never saw that part of it and maintained the friendship even after I pulled away but I couldn't demand he stop being friends with the man. He had to make that decision on his own. He never did and soon Brock was gone. I didn't care but our friendship had ended years earlier. Randy kept in touch with him over the years and was really happy when he came back even if it's only for a little while. He told me all Brock had told him; how he was so happy, he was clean, he was now a family man and had finally grown up. All it took was one look at him to convince me it was all bullshit. I knew he was still the same asshole he'd always been and what he did to Randy proved it."

"Wow," Dr. Adams laughed softly. "So, despite your very strong feelings for Brock, it wouldn't bother you if Randy forgave him this instant and resumed the friendship? You would trust them to go out together…alone?"

John smirked over at the older man. "Yes, I would. I don't have to trust Brock for shit. I just have to trust Randy and I do."

Dr. Adams nodded. "Very good, John." He turned his gaze over to Randy and smiled. "How does it make you feel when John says that he trusts you?"

Randy's glare had softened somewhere down the line of the conversation between John and Dr. Adams and it had been replaced by a sudden feeling of embarrassment. "Good; really good." He took a deep breath and avoided both men's stares. "Those are words I never thought I would hear John say again after what I did and hearing him tell me now always makes me feel really nice. So nice that I kinda wish you weren't here right now, Doc,"

John laughed and moved his hand to lie on Randy's thigh. "I love you, Ran. We'll be home alone soon enough."

Randy smiled and shook his head. "Not soon enough,"

"OK, I think this is a good time to stop for today and let you two get out of here. How about we meet again the day after tomorrow before you hit the road? I want to get into Randy's dynamic with Brock and help him talk about his feelings towards Dwayne before you actually come face with face with either man. I am very proud of how far you've both come and how hard you're both working to fix your marriage." Dr. Adams stood and held out his hand. Both Randy and John stood and shook it before turning to the door and exiting his office.

Randy reached down to grasp John's hand tightly as they walked down the quiet hallway. Most of the staff except for one lone receptionist, who smiled at them as they walked by towards the elevator, was still in the office. Dr. Adams had made their session times for after hours in order to maintain their privacy and both men enjoyed not having to see other people in the office.

The elevator arrived and both men stepped wordlessly inside. It was only when the doors closed that Randy moved, his hands on John's shoulders, turning him around. Before the older man could blink, Randy pushed him against the wall of the elevator by his hips, eliciting a surprised yelp from his lips.

John's eyes widened and he stared into Randy's eyes, his hands bracing themselves on the younger man's chest. "What are you doing, Ran?"

Randy slowly smiled and shook his head. "I want to show you how much I love you and how fucking happy I am that we're getting back to normal,"

John's eyes flickered nervously between Randy's eyes, lips and the security camera inside the elevator. "In here? Baby, maybe we should wait…"

John was cut off by a deep, hard kiss to his lips. His sound of surprise was swallowed by Randy's mouth as the younger man moaned into the kiss, his tongue thrusting inside. John responded with his own moan as he felt his body start to react, his hands clutching at Randy's hips. The kiss was so intense that he fought for breath, until Randy finally released him and he could inhale deeply. Randy gasped for air, as well, his body slumping against John's, his hands still holding the older man's hips tightly.

"Randy," John moved his hands up Randy's chest to wrap around his neck. "Don't do this to me in here, babe. Save it for home,"

"It's just too hard, Johnny," Randy smirked as he thrust his hips against John's. "Pun fully intended."

John laughed as he moved one hand down to cup Randy's face. His lips moved forward, tracing over Randy's jaw, to his ear, and back to his lips, nibbling lightly. Randy opened his lips and John's tongue slipped in, warm and soft. Randy moved his hands under John's shirt to feel his warm skin and both men shivered when the kiss was deepened.

The elevator doors opened with a ding, announcing their arrival on the main floor and John's lips slowly moved away from Randy's, brushing one more little peck across his mouth before complete separation. He stared into Randy's intense gaze and tugged him forward. "Home. Now!"

**A/N: So, I didnt give you any Centon loving in this chapter but if you're nice, I may give you some in the next, LOL. REVIEW!**


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: Was trying to make the best of my summer vacation so sorry for the wait. Two weeks left of summer vacation. Super sad :-( At least I have a WWE event coming up in September and going to Ringside Fest in October! **

It was early in the morning when Randy came out of sleep to the warmth of a kiss on his neck; a little lick and teasing of the tongue. A warm body pressed up against him from behind and his eyes shot open.

"Miss me?" John whispered.

Randy smiled and shook his head. "How could I? You practically slept on top of me. It's like you didn't want me to forget you were there."

"Well, I missed you," John said. He reached over with one arm and held Randy closer. He kissed his neck and Randy felt his breath on his skin. "I kinda wished we didn't need sleep last night."

"I don't know how much longer you expected me to go without getting some rest, Cena." Randy said, wincing slightly as he shifted under John's arm. "After not getting any for months, last night was exhausting."

John laughed softly. "Turn to face me," he said, lifting his arm from around Randy and giving him room to roll over.

Randy rolled over and looked at John. Even in the dim light coming through the windows, he could see the beautiful blue color of John's eyes and the longing within them. John leaned in close, his lips touching Randy's in a gentle kiss. The kiss became deeper and more passionate. John's tongue snaked its way into Randy's mouth and he gave no resistance. Whatever exhaustion he had felt only minutes earlier was hushed by his growing erection. He was shocked at how much he had missed and wanted; no, needed John. John kissed him over and over, holding him closer and swallowing Randy's low moan when he grabbed his erection and began stroking him in a gentle motion.

"Johnny…"

John smiled, gazing at Randy for a moment as he continued stroking him, their lips still joined in a soft, sweet kiss. As their lips parted, John whispered, "Think you could go another round?"

Randy gazed down at John, admiring his body and absentmindedly licked his lips as he nodded. He reached down and stroked him, returning the favor he was getting.

John relaxed, closing his eyes for a few seconds. He smiled and moaned softly. "God, baby, I love your touch."

"I love to touch you," Randy whispered. "Can't think of a better way to spend my morning."

John smiled wide, gazing at Randy again. "Oh yeah? Well, I have to say I agree." He bent to kiss him again while increasing the speed of his strokes. Randy took his hand and placed it on top of John's. "Slow down, Johnny. I don't want this to end too soon."

John let go his grip and kissed Randy again. "Sorry. Got a little carried away."

Randy let go of John's erection and reached up to run his fingers through John's short, spiked hair as he kissed him and held him close. He gave John a gentle push to guide him to roll over on his back and then slid down his body, kissing and teasing him along the way until finally he closed his lips around his cock. Randy felt John quiver beneath him and heard him moan as he began a slow, steady sucking motion and teased him with his tongue.

"Ran…" John said, placing his hands on Randy's head, caressing his hair and holding his head close. "Fuck, you're amazing,"

John was quivering beneath him and that encouraged Randy more, increasing his will to bring his husband pleasure. After a few minutes John whispered, "Baby, I don't want this to end, but you're gonna make me come..."

Randy gave him a final lick and gently let go. John pulled him back up his body, his skin flushed and his breaths coming in pants.

"Enjoy that?" Randy asked with a smile.

"I always do, gorgeous," John said, grinning.

Randy laughed and replied, "It's nice to know I haven't lost my touch."

John quickly shook his head and kissed him again before rolling him over onto his back. "I need you," John said, spreading Randy's legs and positioning himself between them. He moved his fingers down to Randy's entrance and felt him tense up at the sudden sensation. "You're tense again. You need to remember how to relax for me, baby."

Randy stared up into John's blue eyes and nodded. "I know. It's not you; it's me and getting used to us together again. We were apart for a while…"

John smiled as he gently probed and stretched Randy, feeling him slowly relax. "I know and I understand. We'll go slowly until we're completely back to normal," He withdrew his fingers and pushed himself gently into Randy. Randy bit his lip as John slowly moved inside him, settling into a slow rhythm. Randy soon lost himself in the motions and reached down to stroke his own erection.

"You feel amazing," John said, looking down at Randy. "Even better than I remembered."

"So do you," Randy whispered.

John pushed deeper and harder as Randy stroked himself faster, moaning beneath him. He knew he couldn't take much more, but he didn't want it to end. He didn't want to return to sanity and have to figure out how to deal with all the drama still surrounding his and John's marriage. He didn't want to return to what had become his normal life; awkward encounters in locker rooms and therapist appointments. The sensations were too intense and Randy soon found himself at that maddening threshold, just before release. He looked up at John, his bright eyes pleading both for this to end and to keep going. The same agony was reflected back at him and he knew John could not last much longer and neither could he. John pushed harder inside him, hitting his sweet spot in just the right way.

"Oh God, John, please..." Randy whispered.

"Fuck," John said, breathless. "Come with me, baby. I can't hold back much longer..."

Randy quivered as the climax hit him hard and sudden. He cried out loud and felt waves of pleasure rushing over his body as he spilled into his hand. John thrust faster and moments later met his own release with a loud moan. Randy felt the gush of warm fluid inside him and lay there breathless, staring up at John. They looked at each other, wide-eyed and out of breath, still locked in their position and trying to recover from the ecstasy.

John smiled down at him after a few moments when he seemed to have caught his breath. He gave one more teasing stroke as he slowly pulled out and lay down beside Randy, reaching up to caress his hair and kissing him gently.

"I don't think we've had this much sex in a 24 hour period since our honeymoon," Randy said when they broke apart. "I didn't think you still had it in you, Cena."

John laughed. "Hey, let's not forget that you were the one who quit on me last night, Orton."

Randy rolled his eyes before letting them close. "Shut up and let me sleep…for more than a couple of hours this time."

John kissed him softly. "Fine, get some more rest if you need. Keep in mind, though, that I hit the road tomorrow so I'm not done with you yet."

Randy felt his lips curve into a smile and his eyes slowly opened. "That's right. I forgot about that." He swung a leg over John's and lifted onto his body onto his chest. "I'll just sleep when I'm dead."

* * *

"I'm not gonna be able to sit for a week," grumbled Randy as he left the final suitcase in the foyer. "You just couldn't let me sleep, could you?"

John raised an eyebrow over at him. "Um, who started the last round…and who followed who into the shower…and then who threw who back down onto the bed?"

"Shut up," Randy glared at John momentarily before grabbing the backpack from his hands. "Are you sure everything you're going to need is in here? Passport, plane tickets, hotel confirmations…"

"Yes, dear," responded John with a smirk. "I checked it like 5 times but please feel free to check, too."

Randy shrugged and put the backpack on top of John's rolling suitcase. "If you say you checked,"

"You're gonna wait till I'm in another room, aren't you? Fine," John shrugged and moved towards the stairs. "I'll go wander around Ally's room and see if there's anything special I want done in there before she comes back to town with me in a few days and that should give you enough time to check my bag like I know you're dying to do…crazy."

Randy laughed and shook his head, following John. "Don't call me crazy or make fun of how responsible and organized I am, Cena. I'm the glue that keeps this family from falling apart."

John turned over and smiled. He pulled Randy into a hug by his hips and held him close. "Yes, you are, gorgeous."

Randy smile and parted his lips to respond but loud beeps interrupted him before he had a chance to speak. Both his and John's eyes swerved over to the kitchen counter where their cell phones lay. The men broke apart and moved towards the beeping objects. John reached his phone first and bought his Blackberry to life to see Vince McMahon's weekly email that he sent to all WWE talent and road crew waiting for him in his inbox.

"It's just Vince's alert for me. Must be the same for you," he mumbled absentmindedly as he scrolled down the email.

Randy nodded and slid his iPhone bar, his fingers heading directly for his inbox, as well. His forehead creased into a frown, however, when he realized he had received not one but two emails from Vince. He heard a muffled curse escape John's lips and quickly glanced at the weekly alert email the older man was currently scanning. His stomach instantly began to churn as he scanned it and when unable to read anymore, Randy moved on to the second email. A loud gasp escaped him and his stomach pain doubled as he read Vince's request of him. Randy closed the mail app and harshly set the phone down back on the counter, unable to hold it any longer.

John looked up at him, a compassionate look mixed with anger in his suddenly darkened eyes. "You read the part about Brock being there tomorrow." He asked the question as a statement because he knew as well as Randy that in reality it wasn't a question.

Randy nodded. "Yeah. I got a worse email, though."

John frowned and reached for Randy's phone. "Did that asshole actually try to contact you?"

Randy quickly shook his head and lowered his body onto a chair around the countertop. "No, I mean from Vince. He wants me to get on a flight tomorrow morning with you so I could appear on Raw."

John's eyes widened and he stepped back, away from the counter. "What? No,"

Randy shrugged. "Yeah. Looks like my plan of avoiding Brock until I absolutely can't just isn't going to pan out."

"Tell him no, Ran. Just tell him you can't. Tell him you have something to do and you can't. He'll understand and…"

"John," Randy cut off John's desperate attempts to help him. "First of all, he won't understand. Vince can't stand me and you know it. The only reason he attempts to be pleasant with me is because of the money I bring in and the talent he can't deny I have," He rolled his eyes. "And for the last few years, because of you. For the most part, Vince will always see me as a fuck up and he will never stop wondering when I'm going to fuck up again because in his mind, he's sure its gonna happen."

John shook his head and closed the gap between him and Randy. "No, baby. He doesn't think that."

"I don't care if he does. What Vince thinks of me has never mattered." Randy shrugged once more. "I can't hide from this thing with Brock, Johnny. Isn't it better if I just face it now and get it over with?"

John sighed and reached for Randy's hands. He stroked them gently, his fingers brushing over the platinum wedding band Randy wore on his finger that was identical to his. "I just think it's too soon, Randy. Seeing him again is going to bring back feelings I don't think you're ready to face just yet. I mean, you already have to deal with seeing Cody everyday and the crap that does to your head…"

"But I'm doing it and I'm surviving. Hell, I'm more than surviving. I'm beating him at his own game because I'm not playing it." Randy gripped John's hands tightly and stared intently into his eyes. "I can do the same with Brock. I can face him and let him know he has no effect on me whatsoever."

John lowered his head, unable to meet Randy's stare any longer. "I'm scared for you, Ran."

"Are you scared for me or are you scared for you?"

John's eyes snapped back up to meet Randy's and he frowned. "What? What do you mean?"

"You tell the doctor you trust me around Brock. You tell me we're gonna face all of them together and show them all that they didn't win and we're still happy and in love." Randy raised an eyebrow. "Well, it's go time, Cena. It's time to prove it. Are you gonna prove you trust me? Are you gonna stand by me?"

"Randy…" began John slowly but was quickly interrupted by Randy. "Think very clearly how you answer those questions, John. A lot hangs in the balance,"

"Randy," replied John sternly. "I love and trust you even more now that we've been through all of this and of course I will stand beside you." He sighed and pulled one hand out of Randy's grip, moving it up to his face. "I'm scared for you. I hate that I couldn't protect you that night and I hate that I still can't protect you from this; from him and the Cody's of the world. Cody is never going to let you forget that night and I hate that he's going to have Brock as an ally for a few weeks to help torture you. Standing up to them together won't be easy and I'm scared you're going to go back to the Randy I knew years ago; that sad man who would keep everything bottled up and wouldn't open up to anyone."

Randy closed his eyes as John ran his hand over his face. "I'm not that guy anymore, Johnny. I know I have you and that I will always have you. That knowledge alone won't let me go back to being that guy ever again." He opened his eyes and bought John's hands to his lips. "Whatever happens after my confrontation with Brock, you just have to let it happen and let me handle it. I'll be fine and I swear to you, John, I will never do anything to fuck us up again. I will never make a mistake like the one I did…"

"Enough with the apologies. Stop it," John cupped Randy's face with both hands. "I know that. That's not a thought in my head, understand? I trust you; get it through your head. I mean it."

Randy nodded and took a deep breath. "OK, so I'm going to Raw and I'm getting this shit over with. I'll face that motherfucker with the biggest smile on my face. I won't let him get the best of me."

John smiled and lowered his lips to meet Randy's, kissing him deeply. "I love you, Ran. I love you more than anything. You are the strongest person I know but I will never stop wanting to protect you from anything or anyone that may hurt you," he whispered.

"I know, Johnny. You're gonna have to learn to let some things go, though," Randy brushed his lips over John's softly. "Like I had to learn to not check your bags after you said you packed everything you would need in them."

John laughed and moved back, tugging Randy up. "Let's go get you packed, Orton. We gotta get ready for battle."

Randy nodded, the pain and clenching in his stomach having finally calmed…for the time being.

**A/N: REVIEW!**


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: Quickie update because I expect a crazy week this week and will be super busy. School begins for me soon :(**

Randy lost himself in the simple task of folding his and John's clothes and ring gear and placing them neatly into the adjoining lockers. The locker room was abuzz with chatter and a flurry of activity that was normal for a Monday afternoon before Raw. It didn't bother Randy one bit. He was able to tune it out completely and with his solemn mood, he knew no one would dare disturb him. While on any other day it would annoy him that his former bad reputation was still believed to be true by some in the locker room, on this day, he embraced it.

Randy zipped up the two bags he had emptied and put them on the bottom of the large lockers. He stared down at them blankly, unsure of what to do now that he had finished his task and John still hadn't returned from his creative meeting. While he was thankful for the space and silence his coworkers were giving him on that day, he now realized there was a downside to it. With John still gone and no task to occupy his mind, Randy found himself focusing on what could happen when Brock did arrive. Would he come in like nothing had happened between them? Would he show remorse? Did he know what had happened after Randy had left him that night in the bar with Cody?

A large hand landed on Randy's shoulder, snapping him out of his thoughts. He stumbled back, moving away from it. His widened eyes landed on John's surprised face and the older man quickly held up his hands. "It's just me. Relax,"

Randy let out a sigh of relief and shook his head. "I can't relax. I'm going crazy. I need a cigarette,"

"No, you don't," John responded sternly as he lowered his body to the bench in front of the lockers and tugged Randy down beside him. "I'm sorry I took so long. Creative ran late,"

Randy shrugged. "What else is new?" His eyes locked onto John's, calm and collected to anyone else but John could clearly see the storm of emotions in them. "Have you seen him or heard if he's here yet?"

John shook his head and rested his hand on Randy's thigh. "No, baby. He's not here yet."

Randy groaned and shook his head. "A part of me wants him to get here already. Then another part of me wants him to stay away forever." He turned away and a short laugh escaped his lips. "When the hell did this happen to me? When did I turn into this person?"

John moved his hand up and down Randy's thigh, stopping at his knee and squeezing softly to draw his attention back to him. "What are you talking about, Ran? What person?"

"John, I teach Al to stick up for herself if something happens; to defend herself and be confident she can face anything. That's the kind of person I thought I was but I'm not anymore. It's like I've become someone else. I'm so anxious...it's not me," Randy's eyes darted around to ensure no one was near him and John. "It's like yet another thing Brock fucked up for me."

"Randy, you are the strongest person I know, baby. You still stand up for yourself and defend yourself and the confidence you've developed in yourself over the years hasn't gone anywhere." John's eyes bore into Randy's and his voice was stern. "This is a bad situation for you and you have every right to feel anxious about it, Ran. It doesn't mean anything is wrong with you."

Randy's eyes darted around the locker room once more as more people started arriving and settling in. He lowered his voice and asked, "John, what if Cody told him?"

"Cody wouldn't have told him. I made it clear he wasn't to tell anyone," John whispered back. "Don't think of that. You're driving yourself crazy with something that hasn't happened. If Cody had told Brock, everyone would already know about it."

Randy sighed softly. "What if he's just waiting for a moment like tonight and he's gonna do it in front of everyone? Then everyone will know what I did to you, John."

"You have to stop thinking like this, Ran," John gripped Randy's chin and forced his head to stay up. "Stop torturing yourself. Today is just a day like any other. Brock is not going to have a chance to hurt you ever again, I swear it."

"But, John..."

John pulled Randy's face to him, cutting his protest off before he could make it. He kissed him harshly before pulling away. "Stop with the buts,"

Randy sighed and opened his mouth to answer when a bag landed at his feet. His eyes flew up, expecting to land on Brock's form but they landed on Ted's instead. A relieved smile came across his face and he stood to hug his friend. "Hey, Teddy,"

"Hey, yourself. I see things have improved since the last time I saw you two," Ted turned his skeptical gaze on John, who rolled his eyes and turned away.

Randy saw the tension between his husband and best friend and quickly grabbed Ted's arm, bringing his eyes back to him. "We worked things out, Ted. I have you to thank for that. Apparently you gave him some words of advice the night we had our little argument."

"Well, I pretty much just told him how much of a moron I think he is for how he treated you and that you could do way better than him," Ted shrugged and bent to grab his bag. "However, it's your life, Ran and if you want to try and make things work with John, feel free. I just hope he doesn't screw you over...again,"

John quickly stood up and grabbed Ted as he began to move around. His grip tightened when Ted turned over and looked at him, the look of disdain in his eyes obvious. "You are working my last fucking nerve, Dibiase. You should thank God for Randy otherwise you wouldn't be standing right now,"

"Oh, don't worry about Randy. You got something to say or do, Cena? Go ahead and do it," Ted smirked back at John, who tightened his hold on his arm as he fought to keep control.

"Guys, that's enough. I don't need this shit from you two; especially today when I'm so stressed out already." Randy pried John's hand off Ted and pushed him back towards the bench. "You two are gonna have to learn to get along again." He turned his attention towards Ted and shrugged. "John's not going anywhere. If I can make things right with him then you certainly can."

Randy looked back over at John and raised an eyebrow. "Same goes for you, Cena. Ted's my best friend. Fix it. Now."

John rolled his eyes and remained silent. Ted smirked over at him and shook his head, not surprised at John's stubbornness. His forehead crinkled into a frown as something Randy said reverberated back to him.

"What's going on today? Why are you so stressed?"

Randy looked back over at Ted and sighed. "Didn't you hear the awesome news? Brock is gonna appear on Raw tonight!" He rolled his eyes and moved back over to the bench, collapsing on it beside John. "I was just being sarcastic, in case you didn't notice."

Ted smiled slowly and nodded. "I noticed." He sighed and his smile faded. "I'm sorry, Ran. I know he's one of the last people you wanna see."

Randy shrugged and mumbled, "Well, I can't do anything about it, can I?"

Ted shook his head sadly, unsure of how to answer. He swung his bag down to the empty locker beside John's and briefly looked over at the older man. "Do you mind?"

John glared at him momentarily before shrugging dismissively. Ted sighed and slid the zipper open, quickly pulling his clothes out and organizing them in silence. He could feel John tapping his foot on the floor and didn't know if he was reacting to Randy's anxiousness or Ted's closeness.

"Ted,"

Ted looked up from his locker at Randy soft call. "Yeah,"

Randy looked around before continuing, his voice still low. "Do you think Cody told Brock about us? Do you think he told anyone?"

Ted smiled and shook his head. "No, Ran, he didn't. When I bought it up the first time months ago, he acted like he didn't know what I was talking about. Even after I told him you had told me, he still didn't believe me. It took a lot of convincing but he finally admitted it. Apparently John's threat to him that night was really good because to my knowledge, Cody has never told anyone. It seems to be the only good thing John has done during all your drama,"

"Don't fucking start with me again, Dibiase," responded John, his voice rising with anger as he stood.

"Sucks to hear the truth about yourself, doesn't it?" Ted smirked over at him, enjoying torturing the older man.

"Cut it out, guys! I'm not gonna ask you again," Randy moved to stand between the men but focused his gaze on Ted. "This is one of the things I can't stop thinking about Ted. What if Cody cracked and told Brock?"

"Randy, why would he tell Brock of all people? They were never really friends. If anything, Brock was annoyed by Cody. He never hid it and even told Cody constantly. Trust me, Brock knows nothing that happened after you left that bar. He probably just thinks Cody dropped you off in your room and left you with John." Ted shook his head. "You're just freaking out over something that couldn't have happened."

"For once, and I can't believe I'm admitting this, I agree with Ted," John wrapped an arm around Randy's waist, turning him over. "You have to stop this, baby. We're trying to move on from all of this, not dwell on it."

Randy sighed and pulled away from John's hold, pacing the small area in front of the 3 lockers. "It's just...God, you guys are gonna think I'm crazy but fuck it." He moved back over to them and shrugged. "What if those two assholes planned what happened that night? What if Cody knew Brock was gonna convince me to smoke that shit and then made sure he was front and center to pretend and help me? What if they agreed to work together on it?"

Ted's eyes widened and he glanced at John briefly. "Randy, are you serious right now? That's insane,"

"Yeah, baby, you're really grasping at straws now. You're letting your mind play tricks on you. You know deep down inside there's no way that could ever have happened," John shook his head, a small smile on his face. "Can we just stop talking about this and focus on the other things happening tonight? I'm pretty sure we all have matches."

Randy sighed and slowly nodded. "Fine, I'll try. Let's just get out of here, then. Maybe if I work out a little I'll be able to distract myself."

"And if that doesn't work, I'll think of something else to distract you. I'm sure there are tons of empty closets around here we could use," John winked over at Randy as he pulled him back in by his shorts waistband. Randy laughed and nodded. "That actually sounds better than working out..."

"All right, enough. If you two are gonna keep this shit up, I'm gonna go." Ted rolled his eyes at the couple and began to move away.

"Wait, Teddy, we're coming with you," called out Randy. He turned back to place a kiss on John's lips and moved up to his ear. "I love you, Johnny. Thank you for pulling me back in when I get a little crazy."

John stroked the skin under Randy's t-shirt softly and shook his head. "You don't have to thank me, baby. I hate seeing you so sad and anxious. All I want in this world is to see you happy. I love you so much."

Randy nodded, moving in to place another softer kiss on John's lips. "I know," He pulled away reluctantly when he heard Ted groan behind them and linked his and John's hands. They followed Ted to the locker room and were almost out when Ted looked back at them. "Shit, I forgot to take off my ring,"

John groaned and looked down at his hand. "So did I,"

Randy sighed as John lifted their joined hands and pulled them apart. "Just give them to me. I'll put them in my lock-box with mine." He shook his head as both men sheepishly pulled off their wedding bands and dropped them in Randy's hand. "I'll meet you in the weight room, OK."

Randy nodded and waved them away. He walked back over to his locker and threw a few greetings out to some of the boys who were still lounging around. His mood had greatly improved since the talk with John and Ted and it showed. He quickly opened up the lock-box on the top shelf of his locker and carefully dropped in John and Ted's rings. As he secured the lock back in place, Randy heard the door to the locker room open once more. He paid it no attention and remained focused on the lock, focusing on writing the combination on the tape covering his wrists until a large arm draped itself around his shoulders and caused the pen to fall from his hands. Randy spun around in annoyance and his eyes widened when they landed on the person he had been dreading to see.

"What's up, bro?"

Randy stared at Brock's smiling face, the man staring back at him expectantly as he awaited his greeting. "'What's up, bro?' Are you serious?"

Brock's smile faded and a confused expression replaced it. "Uh, yeah. What's your problem?"

"My problem is you walking up to me like we're old friends, bro," responded Randy, his voice rising with anger. It was surprising to him but now that he actually stood in front of Brock he felt nothing but anger for the man. All the anxiousness had disappeared from his body.

"Well, last time I checked we are old friends." Brock shrugged. "What the hell happened?"

"You tried to fuck me over is what happened. Our friendship died the night you got me high after knowing I had stopped doing that shit years ago." Randy lowered his voice to an angry growl.

"Ran, I was just trying to loosen you up that night. We were all hanging out together having drinks..." began Brock.

"Right, having drinks. We were not getting high! You took it upon yourself to get me high! I never asked for it; I didn't know you were gonna give it to me!" Randy shook his head and turned away. "Forget it. I don't even know why I'm bothering explaining anything to you. You're never gonna get it. You're never gonna get that you did something wrong. You're just like Cody!"

Brock frowned. "What? I'm just like Cody? What the fuck are you talking about?"

Randy groaned and cursed at himself inwardly. He had not meant to mention Cody's name while in conversation with Brock. The last thing he wanted was to bring those two together in any way. He had to figure out a way to spin his statement and he had to do it fast. After taking a deep breath, Randy glared at Brock.

"I mean that you both go after what you want without any regards to the person's feelings! Cody's always after my ass even though he knows I'm with John and you gave me drugs even though you knew I was clean. He doesn't think about how it makes me feel and you didn't think about how I would feel after that night."

Brock sighed and shook his head. "Look, Ran, I swear I never wanted to hurt you. You just looked so sad, especially after John came down that night and lectured you like a little kid in front of everyone. I just wanted to see you have a good time. It was obvious you hadn't had one in a long time. I thought we would get a kick out of it once the high came down. I wasn't trying to ruin your clean record or whatever the hell you call it. It wasn't like I gave you anything that strong anyway."

"Oh my God," Randy laughed as he ran his hands over his head. "It's like I'm beating my head against a wall when I try and talk to you. That would probably be more fun, though," His smile soon faded, though. "Brock, you took it upon yourself to try to make me have what you consider fun because in your mind I wasn't having any. Who the hell made you the judge of my life, though? You don't know anything about me. We hadn't seen each other for almost 8 years! Our friendship had become all about quick meetings in airports as we ran for our flights or stupid text messages! You came back assuming I was the same Randy from when we were kids. Then when you came back, even after I told you how much I had changed, you still tried to save me! It was like you could get married and have kids and 'change' but I couldn't! How would you like it if I had done what you did to me to you? Do you realize you could've fucked up my whole life that night?"

Brock shrugged and sighed loudly but remained silent. Randy narrowed his eyes and shook his head. "You don't give two shits about what I'm saying to you. Probably because John was right all along about you; you will never change Brock."

Randy walked around Brock, heading for the door. "We're not friends any more, Brock. I don't need people like you in my life."

Just as Randy reached for the door handle, it was pushed towards him and he stepped back quickly. John pushed into the room, a small smile on his face as he noticed Randy standing near the door. "Hey, what's taking so long, babe?"

Randy's eyes shifted over and John followed their path. His gaze landed on Brock, who stood over beside the lockers belonging to him and Randy. "Fuck, Ran, I'm sorry I wasn't here..."

"No, don't worry. I handled it," Randy smiled and shrugged. "I think I did pretty well, too."

"I'm sure you did, baby," John reached for Randy's hand and squeezed it before raising it up to his lips for a kiss. "Let's get out of here,"

Randy nodded but just as both men were going to walk out the door, Brock's voice rang out after them.

"Seems like everything worked out for you, Ran so I don't know why you're so pissed about that night! Or is it that you're just making a big deal about it so Cena won't get pissed at you?"

John's hold on Randy's hand tightened subconsciously and he clenched his jaw tightly. He turned back and was met with Brock's smirking face. Randy tugged at his hand, drawing John's eyes back to him. "Don't react, Johnny. He's just trying to get a rise out of you. I took care of him already. Just ignore him," he whispered sternly.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Ran. Does Johnny not know what happened that night after he left the bar; after you chose us instead of him?" Brock's smirk deepened when he saw John's nostrils begin to flare as he tried to control his anger. "Want me to fill him in, Ran?"

"Fuck off, Brock. John knows exactly what happened that night so I suggest you stop pushing him," responded Randy, his own temper beginning to flare up once more.

"Oh, he does? Hmm, seems strange you two would still be so tight, then. Last time I checked Cena was kicking you to the curb for doing the same thing you and I did that night." Brock shrugged. "Guess he realized who you really are so he just gave up on you. Better to be with a junkie than alone, right, John John?"

John pulled his hand roughly out of Randy's grip and stalked over to the younger man. His hands locked around Brock's neck before he could blink and he shoved him back towards an empty locker. The few people that still remained in the locker room now scattered, most leaving the room while some stayed back at a safe distance.

"I will fucking kill you, Lesnar. Remove yourself from our lives. Forget Randy and I ever existed or I will fucking bury you," John growled in Brock's face.

Randy quickly hurried over to them and grabbed at John's arm. "Stop it, John. Let him go,"

John ignored his plea and kept his hands locked around Brock's neck, the younger man's face turning beet red. He kicked his legs up, trying to make contact with John's body but failing. His own hands tried to pry John's hand off but nothing worked. John's eyes blazed with fury and he barely felt the welts already forming on his skin from Brock's frantic scratches.

"John, listen to me! Fucking listen!" Randy kept John's arms in a viselike grip. "He isn't worth this shit. He isn't worth the punishment your ass is gonna get if Hunter walks in here right now. Let him go. He isn't worth it,"

John heard Randy's voice finally break through the cloud of fog of anger and he slowly released his hold on Brock's neck, the younger man immediately gasping loudly as he tried to inhale some air. Randy pulled John back, away from Brock sat slumped and grabbed his head, forcing him to look up at him. "It's over, understand. Forget him,"

Randy turned his eyes over to the few men who still stood around, watching in shock. "This stays here, am I understood? You all keep your fucking mouths shut. It's been settled and if I find one of you flapping your gums, you're gonna regret it." He turned back to John, who still seethed beside him. "Let's get out of here,"

"You're gonna regret putting your fucking hands on me, Cena," Brock chocked out after them, his voice hoarse. "Mark my words, asshole!"

Randy instantly felt John's body stiffen at Brock's words and he quickly tugged him out of the locker room and down the hall. "Ignore it. He's just pissed and talking out of his ass. He's not gonna do a damn thing."

"I'm about to explode. I need to get the fuck out of here." John clenched his hands into fists at his sides. "I need some fucking air or something."

"OK, OK," Randy's eyes scanned the hallway for an exit and soon noticed a door leading to a stairwell. "This is gonna have to do. Come on," He pulled John towards the deserted stairwell and let the door close behind them. Randy rested his body on the closed door, ensuring no one would come in and giving John some space and time to pace and calm himself.

It felt like an eternity to Randy but John finally spoke. "I still wanna go back there and kill him."

Randy nodded. "I know, John. He's not worth it, though."

"No one has ever pissed me off as much as him. I literally hate him so much it fucking blinded me," John shook his head and tried taking slow, deep breaths.

Randy sighed. "Johnny, I'm so..."

"If you fucking apologize to me one more time, Orton..." John stopped his pacing directly in front of Randy and looked at him sternly.

Randy raised his hands up and shrugged. "Fine, I won't." He looked down and slowly lowered his body to the ground. "I just hate that this is happening and I can't help feeling responsible."

"Well, stop it. You're not responsible for anything Brock does, Ran. He's an asshole who knows he fucked up that night but doesn't have the balls to admit it," John rolled his eyes. "But most likely he's just an asshole that doesn't care about anyone but himself."

"The second one sounds more like him," mumbled Randy.

John bent down to where Randy sat and met his sad gaze. "I love you, Ran and I will never let him or anyone else hurt you again or try to ruin the life we've built together."

"I know," Randy smiled. "Just promise me you won't yourself suspended or arrested while trying to protect my honor, though."

John laughed and collapsed to the ground in front of Randy. He pushed apart the younger man's legs and slid in between them, wrapping his arms around Randy's neck. "I'll try but I can't make any promises just yet. I tend to get a tad upset when people talk about my man,"

"No kidding?" Randy smirked and pulled John in closer, their lips hovering together. "It's actually kind of a turn on."

John's smile widened and he pressed his lips onto Randy's. He slid his tongue inside Randy's mouth, deepening the soft kiss. John swallowed Randy's moan of pleasure before moving his lips down to his face to suck on his neck lightly. The sound of voices outside the closed door made the men pull apart and Randy groaned softly as he placed a kiss on John's head. "It's getting close to show time, baby."

John buried his head in Randy's neck and mumbled, "I don't wanna go out there,"

"We have to, Johnny," Randy pulled John's head up and gave him one more lingering kiss on his lips. "Come on, Super Cena. This is your house, not Lesnar's. You run this show not him."

John sighed but slowly nodded and lifted himself to his feet. He helped Randy up and they dusted themselves off before opening the door and walking back out into the busy arena hallway hand in hand. They had only taken a few steps when Randy stopped short, his eyes focused on something further down the hall. John felt Randy stop beside him and looked over at him in concern. He saw Randy's eyes trained forward and followed their path to see Brock and Cody huddled together deep in conversation near the catering table.

"Fucking hell," Randy mumbled.

"Don't think anything about it and just keep walking," responded John. He tugged Randy forward and as they approached the table, both Cody and Brock looked up. Cody immediately locked eyes with Randy and winked over at him. Randy rolled his eyes and turned away to look at John but his eyes were locked onto Brock, who had a smirk firmly plastered on his face. The men continued down the hall, away from Cody and Brock's stares. They walked silently, each lost in their own thoughts.

**A/N: Gimme some reviews!**


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: Sorry for the long wait! School's back in session :-(**

John took a deep breath before extending his finger to the small button in the middle of the large wooden door. The moment he pressed it he could hear the chimes ringing throughout the house. He waited patiently until the sound of footsteps approached and the door suddenly swung open, Samantha's frame standing before it.

"Hey, Sam,"

Samantha smiled slowly, her lips straining to keep it on her face. "Hello, John. How are you?"

John sighed inwardly as she remained planted in the doorway and made no effort to invite him in. "I'm well, thank you. Is Ally ready to go?"

Sam shook her head and finally moved to the side, motioning for John to come inside. "No, not yet. Give her a few minutes. We got a late start this morning."

"Oh, ok," mumbled John in reply. He followed Sam into the kitchen, the tension in his body making his shoulders ache. "We have to be out of here in about 15 minutes, though. Our flight leaves in less than 2 hours."

Sam nodded and stood beside her counter. "She'll be right down. I just have her packing a book or two to read on the plane. I don't want her to have to just watch a movie on the iPad. Reading is better for her, you know."

John smiled, amused by her faintly veiled threat. "Of course I know that Sam. That's why we read, too…on the iPad. It's not only for movies, you know."

Sam laughed softly and walked away, not noticing John's eyes roll behind her back. "Would you like a cup of coffee before you leave?"

"No, thanks, I'm OK." John drummed his fingers on the countertop and sighed as the room fell silent, the tension in the room so thick he could cut it with a knife. The silence was broken after a few seconds, however, when Sam turned back to him, her eyebrow raised.

"So, John, I hope you don't think I'm prying but…" She leaned on the counter, her voice lowering. "Are things OK between you and Randy? Ally has mentioned some…tension between you two."

John's face instantly hardened, his senses on full alert. "I don't know why she would mention any tension. Everything is fine between me and Randy."

If possible, Sam's eyebrow rose further. "Well, that's odd. Ally wouldn't have mentioned it if she didn't see something strange to her. She wouldn't lie to me."

"I'm not saying she's lying to you, Sam." John sighed loudly and stood. "Look, I don't know what she thinks she saw but nothing is wrong. Randy and I have been on split schedules lately so maybe that's why she thinks there's tension; because we're spending so much time traveling apart. Other than that, I have no clue." He glanced down at his watch. "We really have to get moving here so do you want to get her or do you want me to do it?"

Sam quickly nodded, anxious to get away from John now that he temper showed signs of rising. She left the kitchen and went upstairs to collect Alanna, bidding her goodbye and thrusting her in John's arms before he barely had a chance to blink. For once he didn't mind and mentally criticize Sam's eagerness to hand over her child. He was just thankful to be out of her house; the house she'd shared with Randy when married to him and the place where some of the most awkward moments of his life had happened. From pretending to be a friend to Sam years earlier as he rekindled his friendship with Randy to walking into the house hand in hand to pick up Alanna after declaring his relationship with Randy to the world. No happy memory for him existed in Sam's house besides the smile of Alanna when she saw him.

John waited until he had driven a few miles away from Sam's house before glancing back in the rearview mirror at Alanna. The small girl sat contently in her car seat, engrossed in a game on his iPad and looking like she hadn't a care in the world. John sighed and focused his gaze on the road before him, unsure if he should bring up what Sam had mentioned to him. There was still a tinge of doubt in his head but John knew it was there only for his benefit. He knew in his heart Sam hadn't lied to him about Alanna's concern. Both Randy and he knew their separation and subsequent bad attitudes toward each other had been noticed by their daughter, especially since she was only used to seeing the men tease and love each other from the moment of her birth. He and Randy had fought to keep things as normal as possible for her sake but Alanna had quickly noticed when they had separated homes under the pretense of John filming a movie. Alanna was a child but she still clearly remembered that when John filmed other movies, they never kept him away from home for long periods of time.

A giggle from the backseat drew John's attention back to Alanna and he sighed softly. He knew they still had about a 10 minute drive to get to the airport and figured there was no time like the present.

"Ally, can we talk for a bit?"

Alanna looked up, lowering the iPad to her lap. "OK,"

John smiled and locked eyes with her momentarily through the rearview mirror. "Ally, Mommy and I were talking and she mentioned you told her you were worried about me and Daddy. Can you tell me why you're worried?"

Alanna's eyes widened after John's question and he hurried to calm her. "Baby, it's OK to talk to your Mommy about things that worry you. She loves you just as much as Daddy and I love you and that's why we talked about it today."

Alanna lowered her eyes and remained silent but after a few seconds, John finally saw her nod slowly. "I told Mommy that you and Daddy looked mad at each other. You were never home anymore and when you were you and Daddy were yelling and giving each other mean looks and you wouldn't stay in the same room and watch movies with me and…"

"OK, Ally, I get it," interrupted John. He sighed and racked his brain for a way to explain to Alanna what was happening between him and Randy in a way she would understand. "Ally, Daddy and I love you so much and even though we have been acting weird, we really love each other a lot, too. We're a family forever and nothing is gonna change that, baby."

Alanna nodded, a worried expression still on her face. John took a deep breath and decided to speak from his heart and hope she would understand. "Ally, sometimes grownups have problems and it makes them mad. They get mad at themselves and at the people they love the most, even if that person has nothing to do with why they are mad in the first place. I think that's what happened with me and Daddy. We got angry and we took it out on each other and you had to see it all and for that I am so sorry, baby. I promise you its over, though. Daddy and I are so happy now and there's gonna be no anger and no yelling, I promise."

John was forced to stop the car at the line of other vehicles going into Lambert airport and took the opportunity to turn around and face his daughter. "Do you understand, Ally?"

"Kinda," Alanna smiled. "You and Daddy are gonna be happy now. Always, right?"

John raised an eyebrow and shrugged. "Well, maybe not always. We're not turning into robots so I'm sure something is gonna make us mad one day and we're gonna yell…"

"Probably Daddy," mumbled Alanna, the smile widening on her face.

John laughed and nodded. "Yeah, he's kinda the loud one. All we can do is promise you that even if we get mad and yell a little, we still love each other so much, baby. You don't have to worry and you can talk to us about it, too, not just Mommy, OK." He stretched his hand forward to reach for Alanna's. He placed a kiss on her knuckles before moving away as a horn rang out behind him.

Alanna giggled and sat back happily. "I can't wait to get to Florida now. We can read the new book Mommy bought me yesterday on the plane! It's about a princess and this prince but then there's this witch and a king and I think one of them has a dog…"

John tuned out Alanna's voice, partly listening while partly praising himself in his head. He was proud of the way he handled the situation and knew Randy would be as well. They had promised each other they would raise Alanna with honesty, always being open about their feelings and concerns. He had managed to do it without divulging too much of what was really happening between him and Randy and hadn't even had to stretch the truth that much. He meant it when he said he and Randy had problems but were now stronger than ever. John felt it in his bones and was planning on making sure nothing changed that.

* * *

Randy paced the area around the entryway to his house, anxiously awaiting John and Alanna's arrival. John had called the minute they pulled away from the Tampa airport and that had been close to 40 minutes ago. He was dying to see not only his daughter but John, especially after receiving his text from the cab seconds after ending the call. He knew John was always skittish when handling a parenting dilemma on his own, despite Randy's constant praise and his years of practice. Randy was proud of John's way of handling things with Alanna; he always had been. He just wished the older man would get it through his head.

The crunch of the gravel on the driveway snapped Randy from his thoughts and he spun around to see a cab heading for him. He smiled happily and approached the back door after the car came to a halt and was greeted by Alanna jumping into his arms.

"Daddy, I missed you so much!"

Randy hugged Alanna tightly to him while watching John exit out of the corner of his eye with their luggage in hand. "I missed you so much, too, beautiful. I'm so happy you're back here with me."

Alanna pulled away slightly, wrinkling her nose when Randy dropped a kiss on it. "I have to read you the story I read Daddy on the plane. It's about a princess and this prince but then there's this witch and a king and I think one of them has…"

"A dog," finished John for her with a laugh. Randy smiled and moved Alanna over to one hip and arm, holding the other open for John to step into the hug. The older man let the suitcases he held in his hand drop to the ground and walked into Randy's embrace, burying his face in his neck and inhaling his scent. "I missed you so much. I hated being away from you."

Randy smiled and rested his cheek on the side of John's head. "I missed you more, handsome. I had to spend 2 days alone in this house. It was torture being away from the two people I love most of all in this world."

John smiled and lifted his head, turning it towards Randy and locking their eyes. "I completely understand."

Randy lowered his lips to John's, letting them brush over his in a soft kiss. "I love you and I'm very proud of the way you handled things, baby." He raised an eyebrow as he drew back and John nodded, catching the meaning of his statement instantly.

Randy turned back over to rest his forehead against Alanna's. "OK, young lady. Let's go inside and get unpacked and maybe you could read me the story while we cook some dinner. I'm sure Daddy is dying for some good home cooking after being away from it for days now."

"Oh my God, you have no idea," replied John with a groan as he took the luggage back in his hands and walked towards the house. "I think I missed your cooking most of all,"

Randy raised an eyebrow as he followed John into the house. "Oh, is that so? Then I guess you can spend the night in the other bedroom without me…since it was just the cooking you missed most of all…"

John quickly turned over and shook his head. "No, no, I misspoke! It was you that I missed most!"

Randy narrowed his eyes and looked over at Alanna, who giggled. "I don't know. Should I believe him, kiddo?"

Alanna quickly nodded, a smile on her face as she watched the men tease each other. "Yes!"

Randy turned back over to John and sighed. "Fine, I guess you can stay."

John held his hand to his chest dramatically and sighed loudly in relief. "Oh, thank God." He smiled happily and walked back over to Randy, quickly placing another kiss on his lips. "I love you and I did miss you most of all,"

Randy nodded. "I know, baby." He winked at him and followed him further inside the house, happy to have it filled with the sounds of his loved ones once more.

* * *

Much later that night Randy and John lay in their bed, the television playing before them with some random late night talk show. Neither man paid any attention as John was engrossed in his iPad, answering the barrage of emails that he received on a daily basis and Randy was focused on the book he held in his lap. Alanna had long since retired to her own bed after exhausting herself with helping Randy cook and bake for dinner and reading every book she'd bought with John. The men had made a conscious effort to show her things were back to normal between them, happy to see Alanna enjoying the love she saw flowing between her fathers once more.

Randy groaned and let the book drop to his lap. John looked over at him, a concerned frown on his face. "What?"

Randy shook his head before letting it rest back on the headboard. "I'm just thinking about what you don't want me to think about…again."

John sighed and moved the iPad over to the nightstand before turning back to face the younger man. "Ran, baby, you can't torture yourself over this. Cody and Brock talking means nothing. They're both assholes so it's no surprise they would gravitate towards each other and become friends. Cody isn't going to open his mouth about anything but if he does, we'll work it out. We wouldn't be the first couple to go through problems backstage and we won't be the last."

"But, John, you hate when personal stuff about you gets out. You hate being the center of the gossip that fills that fucking locker room," Randy rolled his eyes. "Those fucking men gossip more than any women I know."

John laughed and nodded. "You're right. I hate all of it but if it happens, then it happens. Ran, all that matters is that we're together again and committed to each other and our family. We've both acknowledged that we made mistakes and some of them because of the shitty people in our lives. We've forgiven each other. Just let it go, baby."

Randy kept his eyes lowered. "I can't just let it go. I have a feeling in the pit of my stomach that this isn't over, John. Be it by Brock, Cody or even Dwayne when he comes back in a couple of weeks, something is going to happen and I just…" He stopped, finally lifting his head up to meet John's confused gaze. "I feel something is going to happen to break us apart again and this time it could be for good."

John quickly shook his head. "Don't say that! Don't even think it! Nothing is going to happen. I don't know where this feeling is coming from but you push it away and forget it, understand? Nothing is going to break us apart again, Randy."

"I would give anything to have your faith in that, John," Randy shrugged. "But I don't. I'm still scared of what can happen to us and I don't know if that feeling is ever going to go away."

"It will go away with time," replied John. "The trust we had in each other was blind and so pure. It was kind of like that trust children have in adults; innocent. The trust we have in each other now, though, is stronger than ever. We broke it but are working every damn day to rebuild it and that alone makes it stronger than ever. Trust it."

Randy remained silent, taking in John's words. John took the opportunity to slide over, close enough to wrap an arm around his hips and pull their bodies in tight. "You remember when Ally was born? You sent me a picture of her not even an hour old and I swore at that moment when I saw her tiny face that I would protect her against anything and anyone. I knew that I would always keep her in my life, whether we worked things out or not, stayed friends or became more, I didn't care. Somehow, this child would always have me."

Randy smiled and nodded, lowering his head to lie on John's shoulder. John brushed his lips over Randy's forehead in a gentle kiss. "Then when I finally got to meet her days later, I told her what I was feeling even though I knew she wouldn't be able to understand a word. I still felt it was important to let her know she had one more protector in life. You may not know I promised her another thing, though."

Randy frowned and lifted his head, locking gazes with John. "What?"

"I promised her that I would always protect her dad, too; from anything and anyone." John ran his fingers down Randy's face, stopping to trace his lips. "I intend on keeping that promise."

Randy smiled and raised his body up, resting his chest against John's and letting their lips hover together. "I love you," He pressed a kiss onto John's lips before pulling back slightly. "And I trust you,"

John wrapped both arms around Randy's back, letting him settle between his legs as their lips met in kiss after kiss. He sought to let the younger man get all the comfort from him that he could and vowed to try as hard as he could to keep his promise to him and their daughter.

**A/N: REVIEWS, please!**  
**A/N 2: Are you all as excited as I am for the Cena/Punk Night of Champions match?! I am so loving their rivalry. Kinda sexy...  
A/N 3: I am continuing my promise of one-shots for every 50 reviews so I will be contacting reviewers 50, 100, 150 and 200 to offer them a one-shot of their choice. It will keep going as you keep reviewing and it's my way of saying THANK YOU!**


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N: Sorry for the long wait. Trying to get on a schedule and failing miserably.**

Randy lifted Alanna from his shoulders and placed her on the ground. She stared back at him with a pout and he sighed loudly. "Drop the look, Al,"

"But I don't want to go in there! Why can't I stay with you or Daddy?" Alanna crossed her arms over her chest and stared back at her father expectantly.

"Because we're working," responded Randy.

"Then what about Teddy or Evie?" Alanna shot back.

"Ted and Eve are also working and you know that." Randy shook his head as his annoyance grew. "You know this is the deal when you're with us, Al. I don't know why you're acting all surprised. Keep it up and you'll be on the first thing smoking back to St. Louis." He tugged open the door leading to the childcare room found in every arena. He smiled at Angie, the WWE's head childcare giver and pushed Alanna into the room. "Hey Ang! Got another one for you."

Angie smiled over at him and reached for Alanna's hand. "Hey, Ally-cat! How's it going, princess?"

"Not good. Daddy doesn't want me to stay with him," Alanna's pout deepened but she took Angie's hand.

"Al, I'm working! How can you stay with me if I'm going to be in the ring?" Randy rolled his eyes and looked at Angie. "Good luck with her today."

Angie shrugged and looked around the room. "Don't worry! She'll forget her annoyance the minute she sees all her friends here. She can also help me make Simone feel comfortable."

Randy frowned at the unfamiliar name being thrown at him and he scanned the room. His eyes landed on an older girl he'd never seen before but still recognized for some reason. "Who's Simone? Looks kinda old enough to not have to stay here with you." His frown deepened and he shook his head. "It's like I've seen her before but I can't place her face…"

Angie slapped his arm playfully and shook her head. "Stop gawking at her. She's Simone Johnson, Dwayne's daughter! And yeah, she probably could roam about on her own but you know how overprotective he is so…"

Randy's eyes widened in recognition. "Oh, right…that's why I know her." He let out a slow breath and took a step back. "So…I guess Dwayne is here tonight?"

Angie frowned before nodding slowly. "Uh, of course he is, Randy. Why would his daughter be here if he wasn't?"

Randy quickly nodded and let out a nervous laugh. "Yeah, of course…I should've known that." He cleared his throat and reached for Alanna. "You know what? I'm just gonna keep Al with me today."

Angie slowly let go of Alanna's hand and stared at Randy with a confused look on her face. "Why…are you sure…"

Randy nodded and pulled Alanna towards him, hurrying out of the room, his mind racing now that he'd discovered Dwayne in the same arena as him and John. That was not how it was supposed to happen. He hadn't been scheduled to appear on television again for weeks and he and John had already planned it so Alanna would not be with them. The last thing he wanted was a Brock-style confrontation with his daughter in the room.

"Yay! I'm so excited I get to stay with you! I promise I'll be good, Daddy and that I'll help you get ready!"

Randy nodded absentmindedly and continued down the hall, heading for the locker rooms. "Yeah, OK but I'm gonna see if Evie can watch you for a few minutes while Daddy and I figure out our schedules. Behave with her, please because she has to get ready for her own match."

Alanna nodded and skipped down the hall a few steps ahead of Randy. "I can help her do her hair. She brushed mine last time and put a bow on it…hey, who's that guy with Daddy?"

Randy snapped out of his daze and stared down at his daughter as she froze in the middle of the hall, her eyes locked forward. "What?"

Alanna pointed down the hall and Randy hurried his step to catch up with her and round the corner. "Daddy's hugging that guy. Who is he? I think I know him."

Randy's gaze followed the path of Alanna's finger. His eyes widened and he felt his stomach clench as his gaze settled upon John wrapped in Dwayne's arms. He inhaled sharply at the instant sensations of anger and hurt that coursed through his body. The temptation to close the gap between them was overwhelming. There was nothing he wanted more at that moment than to launch himself at Dwayne and tear John away from him.

"Dad? Dad? Who is he?"

Randy shook his head and quickly lifted Alanna up, taking them back down the hallway they had just traveled as he fought to push his anger away. "He's just an old friend. Let's go around this way to get to Evie, OK."

"Why? Don't you wanna see Daddy and his old friend?" Alanna frowned and turned her head back, still trying to see John. "Maybe I can stay with Daddy and his friend since he's not working right now and…"

"No!" Randy snapped, stopping Alanna's words and making her eyes widen. Randy sighed, guilty now for snapping at his innocent daughter who knew nothing of his and John's marriage drama. "I'm sorry, baby. It's just…Daddy is with his friend so let's let them talk and not interrupt, OK?"

Alanna slowly nodded relaxed in Randy's arms, though a confused gaze still remained. "OK,"

* * *

John walked into the men's locker room and threw greetings and smiles at the men gathered there getting ready for the day. Dwayne's words to him in the hall still rang in his head and they made his smile widen.

"_I'm so happy you and Randy are OK again and that you guys were able to get over our giant mistake. You two are so good together, John and I really do wish you all the best."_

A quick scan of the room let John know Randy wasn't among them and it made him frown in concern. Randy should've been back after dropping Alanna off at the childcare center.

John sighed as he lowered his body to the bench in front of his locker. His foot tapped anxiously on the ground and he prayed for Randy's quick arrival. He was dying to talk to the younger man about Dwayne being in the building…and of his sudden change in attitude when he'd encountered him in the hallway. The last thing he wanted was for Randy and Dwayne to encounter each other in the hallway and…well, he didn't even want to think of what could happen with those two. After wandering the halls searching for Randy, though, he figured the best bet would be to find him in the locker room but even that had proved to not pan out.

John was distracted by his thoughts at the sound of the locker room door banging shut. He sighed in relief when he saw Randy finally coming into the room. A smile came upon his face as he stood and started to approach him but stopped short as he caught the look of annoyance on his face. His forehead creased into a frown and he let Randy walk over to him instead. "Hey, babe…you OK?"

Randy nodded his head tersely and continued walking past John to his locker. "I'm fine. Don't you have a match to get ready for?"

John nodded slowly and watched as Randy yanked his ring gear out of his gym bag. He tried to remain calm even as the warning bells went off on his head, alerting him that something was not right. "I do but it's not for awhile. Yours is first so maybe we can hang out with Ally until then."

Randy shook his head and kept his head buried in his bag. "I dropped her off with Eve and I don't feel like hanging out. I have stuff to do," He lifted his head and locked his eyes onto John's confused face. "Why don't you go hang out with your little friend some more?"

John's eyes widened and he instantly knew where Randy's anger stemmed from. "Ran, I… how did you know he was here? Did you see him? I was trying to get to you before you saw him…"

"Well, you didn't. I saw him already," Randy turned away and pulled his boots out, dropping them to the ground.

"I didn't know he was gonna be here, Ran. It's a surprise…I didn't hide it from you." John risked Randy's anger and took a step closer, wrapping his hand around the younger man's wrist and stopping his motions.

Randy pulled his hand back and sighed as he looked around the room and tried to keep his voice level. "I don't want to talk about this here."

"Well, I do. You look pissed and I don't want that. I don't want you to be angry with me ever again, Ran," John lowered his voice and reached for Randy's hand once more.

"Then maybe you shouldn't be hugging the guy you cheated on me with in the middle of a hallway where I could walk by and see you…" Randy's eyes narrowed and he pulled his back again, this time more harshly. "While I'm holding our daughter."

John's face dropped, the surprise written all over it. He shook his head and glanced around the crowded locker room anxiously. "You weren't meant to see that…I mean, not that you shouldn't have seen it because I wasn't trying to hide it from you…we just talked, Ran and we worked things out. We admitted to each other how fucked up we both were that night and agreed to try and put it past us and become friends. Try to understand, baby, please. We're supposed to trust each other, remember?"

Randy sighed and shook his head. "This isn't about me not trusting you, John. I know you aren't going to bang him in a public hallway. It's about me feeling like shit when I saw him with his arms around you. That's not a sight I think I will ever get used to and you can't blame me for that."

"Randy, I know how that must have made you feel…"

"No, you can imagine how that made me feel," interrupted Randy, his voice rising slightly. "You can't know how it made me feel because I've never put you in that position. I don't walk around hugging Cody."

John held up a hand, his eyes darting to his side. "Hold up. It was one hug, Randy. Don't make it seem like this is something I do on a daily basis."

Randy rolled his eyes and took a step away from John, his ring gear clutched in his hand. "One hug or one hundred hugs; it was still enough to make me feel like shit." He shook his head and continued moving away. "Just let me be for today, John. Find someone else to hang out with and leave me alone for a bit."

John remained silent as Randy disappeared into the shower area. It took all his will to not follow him. He turned his eyes over to the other men who remained in the locker room, unaware of why he and Randy had just had words and avoided their gaze as he moved to exit the room and tried to prepare himself for what was already turning into a horrible evening.

* * *

Randy barely moved as the hand smoothed down his back. He didn't have to look to know it was John. Besides him only a few of his coworkers remained at the arena.

"Are you feeling better or are you still mad at me?"

Randy sighed and finally looked up after zipping his bag shut. "I was never mad at you, John. I was just…I don't know."

John slowly sat and reached for Randy's hand, tugging him down onto the bench beside him. "Ran, doesn't Dr. Adams want us to forgive and move on? It's what I'm trying to do. I can't hate Dwayne,"

"Well, I can," responded Randy. He shook his head and avoided John's stare. "I hate him, John and I hate seeing you be ok with him."

"What do you want me to do, Ran? Just tell me and I'll do it." John squeezed Randy's hand and finally succeeded in drawing his eyes over to him.

Randy shrugged, a confused expression on his face. "I don't know,"

"Yes, you do. You're thinking it. Just tell me, baby," John attempted a smile and watched as Randy fought his inner battle.

"I want you to hate him, too, John. I don't want you anywhere near him ever again. I damn sure don't want you hugging and touching him. I want him gone," replied Randy with an exasperated sigh. "It's ridiculous but it's what I want. I know I'll never get it, though."

"Look," John took a deep breath and this time it was he who turned away. "I can promise you that I won't be hugging him on a daily basis but I can't hate him, Randy. I was the one who did something wrong, Ran. I was married and I got drunk and I went after him. I was so blinded by my anger over you and Cody that I didn't even stop to listen to your explanation. I just went and hopped in bed with a man I barely like to begin with. So, I can't hate him. I hate myself and I blame myself."

Randy frowned and grabbed John's face. He forced their eyes to lock and shook his head. "He _did_ do something wrong, John. He knew you were with somebody…committed to somebody. He could've said no but he didn't. How dare you excuse him and try to put all the blame on yourself?"

John shrugged. "Because it's what I still feel." He stopped and let out a short laugh. "I really need more help from a shrink, don't I?"

Randy sighed and slowly nodded. "I think we both do, Johnny. This is a lot more complicated than we both expected and we still have a shitload of stuff to work through…sometimes I wonder if we're moving too fast trying to get back to normal."

John's eyes widened slightly and he shook his head. "We're not taking a step backwards, Ran. Don't even think about it. We decided we're committed to our marriage and that we're staying together and working out our problems and that's exactly what we're going to do. We're going to honor our vows to each other and fight for each other…and our family."

Randy quickly nodded. "I know! That wasn't what I meant! I just meant that's it's obvious we still have a lot of issues; like you saying you hate yourself and my hatred of Dwayne and a million other things that will pop up…we still need to work on them. I don't want us to lose ourselves and convince ourselves that everything is ok when it clearly isn't." He reached for John's hand and bought it up to his lips, kissing the ring he wore on his finger. "I love you, Johnny and I want us to grow old together and I don't want anything but death to separate us. To make that happen, though, we need to have a strong and honest relationship."

"I agree, baby, one hundred percent. I just don't want us to lose the fact we love each other, though. We may still have some problems but we still love each other and that's a pretty big deal." John tugged Randy closer, letting their lips hover together. "That's the most important thing and it's what's going to get us through this."

"I know," replied Randy in a whisper before pulling John into him, their lips meeting in a fierce kiss. John leaned into the kiss, his lips parting as Randy ran his tongue over them. His hands ran up Randy's chest to wrap themselves around his neck. Randy pulled him closer, gripping his waist tightly and moaned as their tongues stroked each other softly. John sighed and slowly pulled back, placing a final soft kiss on Randy's lips. Randy smiled, his eyes closed as he rested his forehead on John's. "I'd better go pick up Al so we can get out of here."

John nodded and released Randy from his hold. He watched him leave the room and turned to get their bags ready, pleased with the way he and Randy were able to handle Dwayne's unexpected visit.

Randy walked down the quiet hallway towards the Diva's locker room, glancing briefly at the few men that remained packing up equipment. His annoyance from earlier had long since vanished and all he was left with now was a faint sensation of guilt for his earlier anger towards John. He should've known that despite all of John's preaching about his anger overwhelming him, he would be the first to forgive. It was in his nature; John was a peacemaker most of all.

As Randy continued to ponder over the day's event, his eyes lifted as he rounded the corner. His mouth dropped open and all color drained from his face as he raced to the end of the hall.

"What the hell are you doing talking to my daughter?" Randy's eyes were wide in his face as he spoke the question more like a statement. "Are you actually, seriously talking to my daughter?"

Dwayne looked at Randy's incredulous face and shrugged as he stood up, a small smile gracing his own face. "She wanted to talk about movies and about how I know her Daddy John. Didn't think it would upset you. Alanna said I'm one of her favorite actors."

Randy glared at the older man, his nostrils flaring as he fought to keep his anger in check. Dwayne's smile widened and he walked around where Randy stood after a final pat to Alanna's head.

"She also said you told her I was one of John's old friends," Dwayne smirked and lowered his voice as he took a step closer so only Randy could hear him. "That's a new name for it, isn't it?"

Randy clenched his jaw and shook his head angrily. "Stay the fuck away from my family, asshole, especially my daughter or I will fucking kill you. I will end you, do you hear me?"

Dwayne shrugged and took a step back. "Whatever you say, Randy," He turned and began to walk away but stopped after only a few paces. "You know, you and John are such a great couple, Randy. You should really enjoy it while you can," He smiled widely, enjoying the fury on Randy's face and turned around once more, this time sauntering down the hallway and disappearing around a corner.

Randy balled his hands into fists, his nails digging into his skin from how tightly he squeezed. His heart was racing and he tried desperately to bring it back under control. The anger coursing through his body at a furious speed and trying to unleash the monster he fought to keep at bay made him want to destroy everything within his reach but the knowledge of his daughter's presence beside him kept it at bay. All he could do was watch Dwayne disappear down a corridor and think of when would be the next time he would reappear.

**A/N: REVIEW! **  
**A/N 2: Did anyone hear the Colt Cabana podcast where Punk hosted and they talk about an "ice cold John Cena"? It was awesome. John Cena is a badass!**


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N: Sorry for the long wait! Gonna go work on LOVE now!**

"Have you ever had a day when all you think about is the 'what if's' of life?"

Randy kept his head down, focusing on the lush, green grass of the park after mumbling his question and interrupting John's talk about their plans for the day.

"The what?"

Randy finally looked up and sighed, meeting John's confused gaze. "The 'what if's' of life. Like, what if we had never met? What if I had not gotten kicked out of the marines and you had stayed in body building. What if we had hated each other at first sight instead of clicking? What if I had admitted to myself that what you were doing was flirting and we had started dating immediately after we met?" He smiled and shrugged. "Don't you think about those things?"

John smiled back and shook his head. "Haven't ever given it much thought. I guess I figure there's no point in thinking about that. I'd rather live my life in the present with the choices I've made."

Randy rolled his eyes and turned away, a small smile on his face. "Why do you have to be so goddamned sensible? You always make me seem like the crazy one."

John laughed and reached for Randy's dangling hand between their bodies. "You're not crazy, Ran. You're just way smarter than I am and your brain works in a different way."

"I'm not smarter than you, college man," Randy's eyes moved down to look at his and John's linked hands. He fought to keep his hand steady but the awkwardness of the hold wasn't lost on him and he was sure it wasn't lost on John, either. Ever since Dwayne's surprise visit to Raw, despite their promises to not let it interfere with their lives, it had changed things. The interesting thing was that both men had their own reasons for the change.

John assumed Randy's odd behavior had to do with his working out his feelings over Dwayne's appearance in their life and the choice he'd made to forgive him. Despite Randy's focus on keeping things normal and moving forward in their relationship, he had distanced himself from John. He was quieter, more nervous and skittish and had withdrawn into himself. In other words, he was not himself. John figured the best bet was to give him the space he needed to work things out on his own in his own way. Pushing Randy never worked and he of all people knew that.

Randy knew he was acting different around John even though he tried every waking moment to remain as normal as possible. His encounter with Dwayne weighed heavily on him and his parting phrase to him echoed in Randy's head on a loop.

_"You know, you and John are such a great couple, Randy. You should really enjoy it while you can,"_

Was it meant as a warning? Was it just a simple, innocent statement? Whatever it was, it was driving him crazy and the fact he hadn't shared his conversation with Dwayne with John was damn near ensuring he was going to end up in an asylum. John knew he and Dwayne had seen each other and spoken in the hallway thanks to Alanna but that part of the conversation Randy had kept to himself. He wasn't even sure how he would begin to bring it up. Would John think anything of it or just blow it off? The last thing he wanted to do was bring his and John's relationship any more stress. He knew the older man was also concerned about Brock and Cody's developing friendship and adding a concern over Dwayne was only going to make it worse. It felt dishonest, though, to not share his concern with John. Not to mention that by hiding his concern, he was acting differently towards John and probably worrying him.

"Yeah, I think the best way to live life is just by living in the present. There's no point worrying about what could've been. It will just depress the hell out of you sometimes. You gotta take what you're given and make it work…"

Randy frowned when he realized John had continued speaking even as he'd drifted off. He shook his head and plastered a smile on his face as he turned to meet John's eyes. "You're right. There should be no thinking of what ifs. I mean, there's no point in thinking what would have happened if we hadn't met because I am positive I could never have made a better friend or lover than you. There's no point in wondering what would have happened if we started dating years earlier because the point is we did start dating and we're together now and we'll be together always, right?"

John nodded. "Absolutely." He lifted Randy's hand to his lips and kissed it gently. "You see; you're brilliant."

Randy rolled his eyes but smiled as they continued on one of the many paths in the park. Alanna's swimming class wouldn't be over for almost another hour so John led them to the benches overlooking the pond. They collapsed onto a bench and Randy sighed deeply, slouching down so he could rest his head on the back of the wooden bench. The sun beamed on his face and another sigh, contented this time, escaped his lips.

"Ran,"

Randy opened his eyes slowly, his free hand coming up to shield them from the bright sunlight. John stared at him, concern clearly displayed over his face.

"What?"

John lowered his eyes. "I know you've been worried about stuff the past couple of days but I wish you wouldn't. I just don't know what to say to you to convince you that my getting past what happened with Dwayne has no effect on us and our marriage, whatsoever. He's never going to be a part of our lives. I've forgiven him so I can move on from what I did, baby and I hope to keep working on forgiving myself because you know I still blame myself for cheating. Dwayne and I are not gonna be friends and he isn't going to be around all the time now. I barely liked him before this all began, remember? You don't have to worry about him in our lives."

Randy smiled slowly and shook his head. "I'm not worried about him becoming your version of Ted, baby. I know he isn't going to become a constant in our lives." He sighed and the smile faded from his face. "Look, I have been worried about something and I've been letting it drive me crazy. All I do is think about it and try to analyze it and I'm losing myself over it and I don't want to but I don't know how to make it stop."

John frowned and turned over in his seat to face Randy. "What? Did something happen?"

Randy took a deep breath and nodded, his eyes moving away from John and to the pond. "Yeah...at least, I think it did," He could feel John slide his body closer to him but didn't move his eyes from the clear blue water. "Dwayne said something to me the other night."

"What? What did he say, Randy?"

Randy finally turned over to face John, the older man's face now serious. "He said we were a great couple and that I should enjoy it while I could."

John frowned. "What?"

Randy shrugged. "That's what he said. It wasn't what he said, though. It was the way he said it. It was ominous, John; it was a warning. He looked happy, almost like he knew something I didn't but he couldn't contain it. He wanted me to know he knew something and to wonder what it was. It was like he wanted me to worry about what was coming." He stopped abruptly, his forehead creased into such a deep frown it hurt.

John sighed softly and squeezed Randy's hand. He remained silent and tried to think of a way to address the younger man's confession. After noticing Randy's raised eyebrow, he figured he would just give it a try and tell him what he really thought.

"Ran, I can understand why you would be thinking that. I think you're reading too much into it, though,"

Randy's eyebrow remained raised, the skepticism written all over his face. "Is that so?"

John bit his lip as his heart began to race. It didn't take a genius to see he was on a very slippery slope. Telling Randy he was overreacting could only lead to a blow out and the younger man accusing him of not taking his side but telling him he was right could make things worse.

"Ran, you don't like Dwayne. You don't think he's truly sorry for what he did and that when he told me he was, he lied. You don't understand how I could forgive him," John took a deep breath. "That's all in your head, though, baby so of course when he tells you we should enjoy each other while we still could, you think it means something." He tentatively smiled. "I mean, would you be thinking this if anyone else has said it? How many people told us pretty much the same thing after we told them we got married?"

Randy stared at John wordlessly for what seemed like hours before he turned back to stare at the pond. He pulled his hand from John's grip and the older man groaned in frustration.

"What; are you angry at me now, Ran? Do you want me to lie to you?"

Randy shook his head but kept his eyes trained forward. "No, I'm not angry at you. And no, I don't want you to lie to me." He shrugged. "It's pretty much the reaction I expected from you anyway."

"Ran, I don't want you to think this in any way means I don't trust you or that I'm taking his side or that..."

"John," interrupted Randy. "I just meant that you are very much a forgiving soul who tries to convince himself that everyone is a good person. That's it,"

John smiled and shook his head. "Don't make me sound naive, though. I know there are bad people in this world, too. I'm not a blind fool, you know."

Randy shrugged. "It doesn't matter, John. Let's just stop talking about it."

"I don't want to just stop talking about it, Ran. I want you to stop worrying about it and stop thinking Dwayne or anyone is going to try to hurt our relationship." John's smile faded as he tried to persuade his husband to relax.

"Yeah, well, unfortunately you can't control my head," Randy sighed and turned to look back over at John. "You weren't there so you can't understand why I feel the way I do about what Dwayne said. I know what he said. I know the tone he used and the look in his eyes when he said it. Every bone in my body is telling me something was off about it and whether you think I'm overreacting or not doesn't matter. Nothing you say will convince me otherwise, either."

"Well, then you're just going to let yourself be driven into a straight jacket. I mean, first you stress about Brock and Cody and some imaginary conspiracy you think they're planning and now you're gonna go crazy trying to decode meaning behind Dwayne's words when I'm telling you everything he says is meaningless!" John stood up and began to pace, unable to sit now that his own frustrations began to grow. "Come on, Ran. How can we move on if you keep focusing on things from the past? You're letting them consume you and distract you from the most important thing right now. We have 5 months to fix our relationship, according to you, and you're not helping me fix it! I can't do it all on my own, Randy!"

Randy stared into John's face, barely blinking despite being directly in the path of his anger. "How hard was is for you to get Dwayne into bed?"

John frowned and stopped his movements, an incredulous look on his face. "Are you fucking kidding me with that question?"

"No, I'm serious. Was it easy to get Dwayne in bed with you? Was he really that drunk? Did you have to make a move on him?" Randy shook his head. "I wonder..."

"We were both drunk off our asses, Randy! I've told you this a million times! We're lucky to have even made it home without getting into a car accident!" John threw his arms up in the air. "Why are we talking about this?"

Randy shrugged. "Because he didn't look drunk to me. Don't forget, I walked in on you guys. He looked pretty damn lucid as he climbed off our bed and got dressed."

"Randy..." began John in a warning tone.

"What if he wasn't as drunk as you think he was? What if we've been making a mistake focusing on what Brock and Cody are gonna do when Dwayne is the one we should be worrying about?" Randy slowly stood and leaned against the bench. "Those 'what if's' are a bitch to think about."

"Then, stop fucking thinking about," growled John. He moved over to where Randy stood and gripped his arm tightly. "None of this shit matters. If you feel Dwayne said what he said in a certain way then he probably did it to fuck with you. It shouldn't matter, though. Let him try and fuck with us as much as he wants; let Brock and Cody, too. Let's stop worrying about what other people are gonna do and say, Randy."

The men stared at each other in silence until Randy suddenly spoke.

"Who drove home? I remember that night seeing only your car in the driveway. How did it get there?" he asked, ignoring John's request.

John sighed and shook his head. "I refuse to keep playing this game, Randy."

"That's the last question, I promise. From now on I'll keep all my theories to myself." Randy lifted his hand to his heart and made a cross over it.

John rolled his eyes. "Dwayne drove my car home. He had a car drop him off after I called and told him to meet me at the bar. I wanted to hop in a cab after since we were so bombed but he said he could manage the drive and thankfully he was right and we didn't drive into a ditch." He raised an eyebrow and shrugged. "Are you happy with that answer? Can we stop this shit now?"

Randy nodded and turned over and watched the ducks in the pond, floating along without a care in the world as some splashed in the water. "Sure, but just tell me one thing...how could an answer like that not make a couple of 'what if's' of your own pop into your head?" He shook his head and met John's confused stare. "You were in one of the hottest bars in Tampa with a millionaire movie star with a pretty clean Hollywood rep so far but a star we know to be one of the most conceited, pretentious and selfish assholes on this planet. There had to have been tons of paps around and tons of cops making the rounds to fill their ticket quotas and looking to have their 15 minutes of fame when they arrest a celeb for drunk driving. It would make for a humiliating situation and could cost a lot; fans, movie deals, money...but Dwayne still hopped behind the wheel of your car and risked it."

Randy smiled slowly. "Does that sound like something Dwayne would do; bombed or not, would he risk his career and rep for a simple fuck?"

John shrugged. "What are you saying, Ran? That Dwayne wasn't drunk? He just wanted to fuck me and pretended to be?"

Randy shrugged as well. "I'm just saying what if..." He glanced down at his watch. "We better go. Al's class is over in a few minutes."

John nodded mutely and followed Randy around the bench and towards the path they had walked on earlier, his head now spinning what what if's.

**A/N: REVIEW!**


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N: Update time! Happy early Halloween!**

"And the teacher told me if I keep practicing, I can be in the recital and be one of the flowers and not the bumblebees because I'm a really good dance. I told her I will but that I'm going home with mommy in a couple of days so I will practice there and maybe she can see me dance on the computer camera…"

"Sweetheart," John bent to grasp Alanna's arms and smiled. "Can you please go up to your room so Daddy and I can cook dinner and talk for a little bit?"

"About what?" Alanna cocked her head to the side, an eyebrow raised.

"Grown up stuff that doesn't concern you," replied John sternly. "Please go. We'll call you down when dinner is ready."

Alanna sighed loudly. "Fine,"

John watched as Alanna trudged up the stairs slowly, ensuring she had reached the second landing before turning his gaze back to Randy. The younger man tried to smother a smile from where he stood over at the far side of the counter, chopping vegetables. "I was wondering how long it would take you to send her to her room. If I hear that flowers and bumblebee dance story one more time myself…"

"That's not why I asked her to leave, Ran," responded John. Randy frowned at the coldness of his tone and lowered the knife to the counter surface. He turned over to face John and crossed his arms over his chest. "So why did you?"

John shook his head at him. "Like you don't know,"

Randy rolled his eyes. "I don't. I can't read your mind, Cena."

"You mean the mind you fucked with earlier today in the park?" John turned away and began to pace the area around the kitchen. "You put all these unnecessary thoughts in my head, Ran. All I can do is stress about them now! Are you happy to finally be turning me into paranoid nutcase like you?"

Randy narrowed his eyes. "Thanks for the compliment, asshole."

"Randy, you know what I mean," replied John sternly. "There's no point to all of this stressing out you're doing over 'what-if's'. You're driving yourself crazy and it's your own fault. I don't want to become you. I refuse to play that game with you and I'm getting tired of having to talk you out of all these crazy ideas because that's exactly what they are, Ran; crazy ideas!"

Randy stared at John intently, his eyes cold. "So, when you tell me you want me share everything with you, you really only mean you want me to share the good stuff. If I have doubts or concerns, I'm supposed to keep them to myself because they're not valid. I'm just a paranoid nutcase, right?"

John sighed loudly. "I should've known you were gonna turn this into some big ass dramatic fight,"

"Well, what the fuck am I supposed to think, Cena!" Randy's voice rose to a yell, the sound echoing around the room. "I'm telling you what I feel; what I fucking believe and you're just dismissing me,"

"I'm not dismissing you! I'm trying to convince you that nothing is wrong and that nothing is going to happen but you keep harping on it so much that it's like you **want **something to happen!"John's voice rose to compete with Randy's. "Is that what this is really all about? Are you having doubts about us and you're just using all these theories of yours as an excuse to divorce?"

Randy's mouth slowly dropped open and he shook his head. "Wow, and you call me a paranoid nutcase. I can't believe it." he held up his hand when John started to answer. "Don't! Don't even bother any more. If I haven't convinced you by now that I'm serious about working out our relationship then I never will. I really don't know what it's gonna take for you to be convinced, though. I'm going to therapy with you and going over every fucking mistake I've ever made despite how much I hate to think about the person I was and I'm doing it for you; for us. I've told you a million times how sorry I am for sleeping with Cody despite the fact that anyone else would've already told you to get over it; that it wasn't his fault because he had been drugged. I didn't care; I told you, immediately after it happened and I have apologized for it. I've told you I've forgiven you for Dwayne and I've proven it...in a lot of different ways, number one being by getting back in bed with you. I don't know what else I can do, John."

John remained silent, his gaze moving downward. "I'm just sick of it, Ran. I get that you have to share your concerns but…I just don't want to hear them."

Randy shrugged and turned away. "Fine, John. You won't," He walked out of the kitchen, abandoning his dinner preparations, and headed for the stairs.

John quickly followed and reached Randy just as he started the climb up. He grasped his arm and pulled him back, ignoring the daggers Randy threw at him with his eyes. "Wait, Ran, that came out wrong…"

"This whole conversation has been 'wrong', John and I don't want to continue it. I'm too close to saying something…" Randy pulled his hand back and sighed. "I'm too exhausted. Fighting with you has always been the most difficult thing I've had to do and I don't want to do it anymore. Just forget it,"

"No, I won't forget it," replied John sternly. He maintained his grip on Randy's arm even as the younger man tried to pull away. "When I say I don't want to hear your concerns it's because I'm scared of them, Ran. I don't want to hear them because I'm afraid that they may be right. I mean, as crazy as it would be that these men have nothing better to do than to fuck with our lives…I don't want to think of it. I don't want to think of anything that can ruin us again."

"You're ruining us, John," responded Randy, his voice barely a whisper.

John inhaled sharply at Randy's statement and dropped his hand, letting the younger man go. Randy stared at him sadly for a few seconds before turning away and walking up the stairs.

* * *

"The food from the diner was good, Daddy but I like your food better."

Randy smiled as he wrapped the covers around Alanna snugly. "Thanks, sweetheart. I'll make you some of my dinner tomorrow. I just didn't feel up to it earlier,"

"Does your head still hurt, Daddy?" Alanna frowned up in concern at him.

"Just a little bit but I'll be fine, baby. Don't worry about me," Randy bent and kissed Alanna's head before standing. "Sleep tight,"

Alanna smiled at him as he walked out of the room. Randy closed the door behind him, leaving it slightly ajar. He walked down to his bedroom slowly, his head indeed pounding despite telling Alanna the pain had lessened.

As he walked into his and John's bedroom, his eyes landed on John grabbing a pillow off their bed. He ignored the older man and headed directly into the bathroom. As he searched the cabinet for some Tylenol and quickly gulped them down, he heard John moving around the room. While the temptation to spend the night in the bathroom and continue ignoring John was great, the pain in his head made Randy head back for the bathroom door. His eyes remained trained on the floor but he notice John had also moved one of the blankets off the bed and was now digging in his drawers. Randy moved towards the half empty bed and threw his weary body onto it, pulling the remaining blanket over his body and covering his head. He closed his eyes and was willing the medicine to make his headache disappear when he felt a hand land on his shoulder. Randy quickly jerked away and lowered the blanket from his face, his eyes widened in surprise.

John stared at him, a somewhat guilty expression on his face as he kneeled by the side of the bed. He quickly moved his hands away and held them up. "I just wanted to let you know I'm gonna sleep in the other room. I figure its best we don't keep talking tonight since you obviously don't seem to be in the mood and I'm tired of fighting myself. Tomorrow maybe we can keep talking…"

"Whatever, John, I don't care. Just let me sleep. My head is killing me," mumbled Randy in response, his eyes drifting shut.

"Do you want me to do something for you?" asked John cautiously. "I can get you some medicine or bring you a cup of coffee. The caffeine is supposed to help with headaches,"

"I don't want anything but the lights off and some quiet, John," replied Randy, his eyes opening. His annoyance at John slowly faded when he saw the concern in his eyes. "I'll be fine. I need some sleep."

John nodded, still concerned. "I know. Today was intense,"

"Understatement of the year, Cena," Randy rolled his eyes but his lips twitched in the beginning of a grin.

John smiled and lowered his eyes. "I hate going to bed without talking about this, Ran."

Randy's amusement faded and he shook his head. "Well, that's too bad because I can't talk about this anymore. I'm exhausted, John…and I don't mean physically."

"I told you why I flipped out. I'm scared to think of all the things you're concerned about, Ran. I don't want to think of anyone hurting us…" began John but he was quickly interrupted by Randy. "So you choose to call me crazy and tell me to keep all of my concerns bottled up and you don't realize that by acting like that **you're** the one hurting us! You're hurting me, at least."

"I didn't mean to. I was just so irritated…when you get on a kick about something you just don't stop and I couldn't hear it anymore and I exploded!" John stood from the side of the bed and began to pace, his hands moving up to run over his head. "You know how I get, Ran! You get the exact same way; pissed off as hell."

"I know but you went too far, though. To ask me if I'm trying to use it as an excuse for divorce…" Randy turned over in the bed, his eyes locked onto the bedroom ceiling. "I mean, thinking it is bad enough, John but actually asking me…" He stopped and lifted a hand to cover his eyes, his head resuming its pound.

"I know I went too far and I'm sorry but…" John sighed loudly, drawing Randy's stare over to him. "It's how I felt for a minute there, Randy and I don't want to lie to you. I had to ask."

Randy pushed away the pain and slid up in the bed. He shrugged and shook his head at John. "So, if this gonna be an everyday fear of yours now? If I complain about something or worry about something or if I get on another kick about something 5 years from now, too, are you gonna flip out and think I'm asking for a divorce?"

"I'm still scared for us, Randy. We're not where we were. A few months ago there was nothing you could've done that would've made me fear you were drifting away and thinking of anything but us being together for the rest of our lives. Things are different now." John walked over to the side of the bed and lowered himself down. "We both made huge mistakes and it's gonna take us a long time to get back to that place. The wait is nerve-wracking, though…it's fucking killing me."

"So, you're just gonna continue to imagine the worst? Wow, and you call me a paranoid nutcase," replied Randy with a smirk.

John smiled. "I'm sorry, Ran. I feel like I've apologized to you more the past couple months than I have the entire decade I've known you."

"Then stop doing shit to be sorry for," responded Randy, narrowing his eyes. "I was wrong. Right now the biggest obstacle to us being together is you and your attitude towards me, not Brock, Cody or Dwayne. I can't be with you if you want me to change who I am and to hide my feelings in front of you. I can't be all rainbows and butterflies."

John remained silent, his smile fading and his eyes drifting down.

"Is that what you want, John?" pressed Randy, raising an eyebrow. "You asked me if I was looking for an out but you're acting…"

"I don't want a way out!" interrupted John, already knowing what Randy was going to ask. "That's the last thing I want! Why do you think I was so worried about you and the way you're acting?"

"I don't want a way out, either, John! I've told you that! I've made it clear I don't want anyone but you and aren't my concerns over Brock, Cody and Dwayne enough to prove it to you? The reason I'm so worried about them is because I don't want anything to break us up. Why would I care about that if I wanted a way out of our marriage, John?" Randy kept his eyebrow raised and watched as John's eyes darkened.

"All I can say is that I am sorry, Randy. We both have tempers but I let mine get the best of me." John shrugged. "I can't do any more. Just ask that you forgive me and continue trying to get over all of my own issues."

"I told you a couple weeks ago, I don't want us to fight so much that this relationship turns into something exhausting. I told you I didn't want any more apologies, John. I want there to be no fights so the apologies don't have to follow." Randy crossed his arms over his chest, not ready to give in to John's apology just yet.

"I know…" John sighed. "I know you hate hearing it." He moved up to the edge of the bed beside where Randy lay and reached for the younger man's hand before he had a chance to move it away. "I promise to do better but can you promise me to calm down a little about those 3 assholes? I told you I wouldn't let anyone hurt us again and I intend to keep that promise. Please try to not worry so much because even if they do want to fuck with us, Ran, I don't care. Nothing will separate me from you again so let them try."

Randy looked down at John's hand covering his own and he slowly nodded. "Fine, I'll try to relax a little but if I have something worrying me, I'm gonna speak it. I'm not gonna lie to you and pretend everything is ok and become some kind of Stepford husband…no matter how much you want one."

John laughed and shook his head. "If I wanted some guy to bow down to my every command, never question me and be a robot with no mind of his own, I would've never gone after you, Orton. I love you; all of you and that includes your crazy lizard brain."

Randy's lips finally curved into a smile. "My lizard brain?"

"Yeah," replied John, a smile on his own lips. He lifted Randy's hand to his lips and kissed it gently before letting it drop back to the bed. He stared into Randy's eyes with a hopeful expression and mumbled, "I'd better go to my own room now…"

Randy nodded and leaned back onto his pillows. "Yeah, that sounds like a good idea."

John's face dropped, a disappointed look overtaking it. "Oh uh…ok. I'll see you tomorrow morning then…"

Randy nodded once more and watched as John began a devastated trudge towards the door, carrying his pillow and blanket. He waited until John was halfway out the door before sitting back up and calling out, "Cena, get your ass back in here!"

John turned over, his eyes widening. "What?"

Randy smiled and patted the side of the bed. "Get your ass back in here…now."

John quickly let the bedroom door close and he hurried back to the bed, climbing in beside Randy and immediately drawing him into his arms. He groaned and grabbed Randy's face in his hands, pulling his face towards him, their lips joining, warm and soft. He slipped his tongue inside Randy's mouth slowly, feeling the younger man start to kiss back. Randy pressed up against him, throwing his arms around John's neck and allowing their tongues to caress. He moved his hands down John's body and stroked his strong back gently. John ran his hands up, running them through Randy's short hair, their tongues intertwined, then slid his hands down Randy's back to enjoy the feel of his toned back muscles. The men pulled away breathlessly and Randy was the first to speak.

"You're seriously gonna make me kick your ass one day, Cena."

John leaned in close, his lips touching Randy's in a gentle kiss. The kiss became deeper and more passionate. His tongue snaked its way into Randy's mouth and he gave no resistance. John kissed him over and over, holding him closer and swallowing Randy's low moan until he finally pulled away. "As long as you're with me, I don't care what you're doing to me."

**A/N: Review!**


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N: Updated both stories this weekend! Thank goodness! Tomorrow I start work again after a week off due to Hurricane Sandy so will try to update again soon! **

John opened his eyes and instantly turned to the side seeking out Randy's warmth. It only took a second for him to realize he was alone in the large king size bed. He sighed and contemplated remaining in bed longer but soon found himself on his feet and heading for the bathroom. It was a rare day John found himself able to stay in bed once his eyes were open. His body had long since been trained to run on short nights and to hit the go button the minute he was awake. Randy was usually the one to want to stick to the covers...unless he'd had a bad night. A couple tosses and turns was all it took to make the younger man give up on sleep.

John lifted his face up to the mirror and set his toothbrush down. He frowned as he tried to remember what happened the night before after he and Randy resolved their argument but all he could remember was falling asleep beside the younger man.

With a sigh, John turned and exited the bathroom. His eyes widened as they landed on Randy entering the bedroom, closing the door quietly behind him. "Hey..."

Randy looked over his shoulder and smiled. "Hey, good morning."

John returned the smile and nodded, feeling awkward as he stood in the bathroom doorway. "You're up early. Bad night?"

Randy shook his head and shrugged. "Not at all. Just not sleepy, I guess so I figured I would go check on Al, who's still knocked out."

John watched as he headed for the bed and started folding the sheets. He slowly took a step forward and cleared his throat, causing Randy's eyes to lift and meet his. The smile faded from John's face and he took a deep breath. "Are you still mad at me?"

Randy frowned, letting a blanket fall from his hand. "What? No. I thought we fixed everything last night."

"It's just..." John moved his eyes back down to the bed. "You weren't here when I woke up and you never really wake up before me unless you're upset about something and you haven't slept. I just figured you regretted forgiving me last night and..."

Randy held up his hand and shook his head. "Are you serious? I get up before you to pee and drink some coffee before Al comes barging in here talking non stop about ballerina's and bumblebee's and you think it means I regret our entire conversation last night?" He raised an eyebrow and walked around the bed, slowly approaching John. "What was it that you called me yesterday...a paranoid nutcase?"

Randy's lips curved into a smile. "Teapot, meet kettle."

John averted Randy's stare and mumbled, "You're still worse than me." His eyes rose slowly to come into contact with Randy's t-shirt clad chest and they continued moving up his body until they met the younger man's sparkling eyes. "It's just...Ran, I..."

"I know, Johnny," interrupted Randy. He looped his arms around John's waist and pulled him closer, their bodies pressed tightly together. "It's nice to know you're just as paranoid as I am. It makes me love you even more. Remember, I fell in love with you when you showed me the real you; the crazy, imperfect you."

John laughed and nodded. "Well, then it looks like you're stuck with me for awhile, Orton." He wrapped his arms around Randy's neck and stroked the skin gently before moving his hands down the younger man's back.

"Good. I wouldn't want it any other way," replied Randy. He subconsciously leaned into John's hand, his body craving the touch of his husband. Even though they had worked out their latest problem, he wanted nothing more than John's kisses and touches; for him to soothe him and reinforce to him that everything would be okay. "Johnny..."

"Yes, baby?"

Looking at John's smiling face, Randy felt an incredible surge of love and lust rush through his body and soul. He felt his face flush and his cock began to swell. "Do you think we have time before Al wakes up..."

Randy trailed off as John moved his lips over his ear and back down to his collarbone. His arms came up around Randy's waist, pressing their bodies tightly together. He lifted Randy up and after hurriedly having placed him on the bed, pounced on top of him. Randy closed his eyes with a groan as John placed his lips on his neck and sucked hard, but they shot open again and he gasped in surprise as John suddenly grabbed his t-shirt at the hem and ripped it cleanly apart. His shorts and underwear and John's own clothes received the same treatment, effortlessly torn to shreds by John with a growl that was so filled with lust that Randy almost felt as if he would come from that alone.

John fastened his lips around one of Randy's nipples, making the younger man cry out. He sucked the nub, teased it with lips, tongue and teeth before reaching in the nightstand drawer and taking out the lube. He poured some on his fingers and slipped his hand between Randy's legs, lightly rubbing the skin around Randy's opening with his index finger before pushing it inside, gently rotating it, and then adding another finger when the tightness eased. Randy moaned loudly, forgetting for a second their sleeping daughter only rooms away, as John began teasing his prostate. Smiling, John removed his fingers, poured more lube onto his hand and wrapped it around his shaft.

Randy watched, licking his lips as John lubed himself up, a shiver running through his body at the sight of the glistening large member that was about to enter his body. When John positioned himself, Randy wrapped his legs around his waist, gazing with reverence into the bright, blue eyes of his husband.

John pushed, groaning as his member slid inside Randy's passage. "Oh, God... Baby, you're so hot... you feel so good."

"You... too..." Randy gasped. He pulled John down for a kiss, moaning into it when John suddenly began moving. He slid in and out with long strokes, so achingly slowly that Randy began whimpering and moving his body impatiently.

"Please," he begged when John showed no sign of speeding up. "John, please! I need it! Please!"

John nodded and, without warning, he snapped his hips and drove his entire length into Randy with one hard thrust. Randy gasped loudly, John's name escaping his lips.

"John!"

John didn't pause; he kept thrusting, hard and fast. Randy had both arms and legs wrapped around John's body, digging his fingers into his back and as he desperately pushed his hips up and tried to meet John's thrusts. Moans and cries filled the air and sweat broke out on their skin. John kissed and nibbled on Randy's ear, his collarbone, his chin, any part he could reach. Randy panted and gasped, crying out when John raised his body enough to be able to take Randy's cock in his hand.

"John, I can't..." Randy sobbed. "I'm coming..."

"Me, too, baby," John panted. "Let go, its okay."

When Randy felt a sharp bite on his neck he exploded, screaming as his cock spurted to cover his and John's chest with his release. Pulling Randy into his arms, John pushed in one final time and emptied his own release inside Randy, a sound of absolute pleasure coming from his mouth.

After a while, when his breathing began to return to normal and his arms and legs felt less like jelly, John rolled off Randy and took him into his arms, kissing him softly.

"I don't know how it's possible," Randy whispered, "but it gets better every damn time."

John chuckled. "I know. How did we live without each other for all those months?"

Randy looked up into John's face and shook his head. "Let's never let that happen again, OK?"

"Never," John grabbed Randy's face in his hands and leaned forward to kiss him. Randy kissed him back, holding him tight in place as he ravished John's mouth with his tongue.

* * *

"Nice to see you back, boys. Catch me up. What's been going on in your lives?"

Randy and John looked at each other after Dr. Adams' question, a smile on each of their faces as they shared a knowing look.

"Oh my. Should I be worried about that look?" asked Dr. Adams, a laugh escaping him.

"No…I don't think so. It's just a lot happened since we saw you last," replied John. He sighed and looked back at Randy. "I don't think we know where to begin."

"Well, Brock came back and John almost killed him. I stressed about it a lot but John managed to keep me calm and I was able to confront him and tell him in very simple, easy for him to understand terms that our friendship was over. Dwayne came back and I had a minor meltdown when I saw him and John hugging in the hall. John told me he forgave him and I thought he was insane especially when only hours later I ran into Dwayne in the hall and he threatened our marriage…" Randy shrugged. "Or at least I think he did." He took a deep breath before continuing. "I have a theory about Cody and Brock working together to ruin my marriage and now I'm convinced Dwayne is also gonna try. Said theory is driving John crazy and we had a huge fight over it. When he told me he didn't want me to be a Stepford husband, though and admitted he was just scared of the way my lizard brain thinks, we worked things out. Oh, and our daughter started to realize things had changed between me and John and mentioned it to my ex-wife. Thankfully, John calmed both of them down and I didn't have to go through the grand inquisition from Sam."

Dr. Adams stared back at Randy, a look of disbelief on his face. "It's only been a couple of weeks…how did all of this happen in such a short time…"

"Interesting lives we lead, Doc," replied Randy with a smile. He leaned back on the sofa and turned over to John, who watched him with an amused smile. "Right, Johnny?"

"So right you are," responded the older man. He winked at Randy before turning his attention back to the shocked doctor. "Look, Doc, I'll break it down for you. Randy and I have been very honest with each other over the past couple of weeks and acknowledged that we still have lots of issues to work out." John sighed and shrugged. "As much as I would like to wake up tomorrow and have things magically fixed with Randy, it's not gonna happen."

"What are some of the issues you've been able to pinpoint after these past couple weeks?" Dr. Adams leaned back in his chair and waited expectantly.

John looked over at Randy and frowned. "I need to work on my patience, I guess. I'm so anxious to get things back to normal that I'm trying to force it. I'm too busy pretending nothing is wrong and all I'm doing in the process is making things worse. Randy has concerns about these men trying to interfere in our life and I don't. The thing is, though, I don't know if it's that I'm really not concerned or if I'm just trying to convince myself I'm not concerned." His frown deepened and he bit his lip before continuing. "Randy has a point to be worried to an extent. These men could very easily tell everyone we work with about what happened and have us become the hot gossip item for weeks or months to come. I know that worries him because he knows I hate my name being in the gossip mill. The thing is, that's all they could really do to us and after thinking about it, I don't care. So let people gossip about us! In a couple of weeks something else will happen and everyone will forget."

John locked eyes with Randy and said sternly, "That's all they can do to us, Ran. If you think they can do anymore and break us apart, you're wrong and I will keep telling you that until I'm blue in the face."

Randy's eyes widened and Dr Adams saw his mouth open for a retort. He quickly stepped in and held up his hand. "Whoa, let's slow this down. Let's start with the first thing you said happened, Randy; Brock's return. It sounds like you handled it much better than John did."

Randy sighed and shrugged. "I guess but barely. I panicked the entire night before getting on the flight then I panicked at the arena but for some reason when I saw him, I was calm and able to tell him what I felt. In no way was my panic because I thought he would hurt me or something. It's weird because I don't think I even know why I was so nervous. This man betrayed me royally and I have made the decision to cut him out of my life and I wanted to tell him that to his face. I guess that was why I was stressing. Having to tell a friend that your friendship is over when they won't even acknowledge they did something wrong…" He stopped and shook his head. "It's hard because despite what he did, Brock and I were really good friends. He threw it all away in one moment and it hurt. It hurt having to tell him we were no longer anything."

Randy turned towards John. "It hurt a lot less when I saw him goading John into a fight, though. At that moment I saw in Brock what John had always seen in him; a selfish son of a bitch."

"I was furious when he started throwing what happened on that night in my face; insinuating Randy had lied to me and hadn't told me what he'd done to him. I lost it and my hands were around his neck before I knew it. I could've so easily snapped his neck," John sighed. "I don't like giving someone else that much power over me and at that moment I did. I just hate Brock so much and I had to stop the bullshit coming out of his mouth!"

"John, I can understand your intense dislike for Brock but that was Randy's battle, not yours. Now, what's done is done but can I suggest staying away from the man? He got a reaction out of you already and no good came of it, I'm sure. No good will ever come of it. It looks like Randy made his intentions with Brock very clear so there should be no more interactions. However, if you do run into each other again, avoidance is key." Dr. Adams raised an eyebrow over at John. "He can't do anything but gossip, right?"

John rolled his eyes and mumbled, "Right,"

Randy smiled at John's clear annoyance of the doctor's scolding but remained quiet. He could feel Dr. Adams' stare moving onto him and turned over to face him. "You wanna talk about Dwayne now, don't you?"

Dr. Adams smiled and nodded. "Please,"

Randy's smile faded and he shrugged. "Dwayne came back unexpectedly so I couldn't prepare myself for it. I was just walking down a hallway with our daughter and saw him and John hugging. I got annoyed and refused to talk to John about it but eventually gave in. Cut to a few hours later when I'm going to pick up our daughter, I see her talking to the asshole who has the nerve to tell me that John and I are such a great couple and we should really enjoy it while we can,"

Dr. Adams frowned. "OK…and that upset you? Why?"

Randy rolled his eyes, his irritation growing by the minute. "It wasn't what he said! It was how he said it and he said in a way that made me think he was warning me about something! I'm not crazy, you know. I wouldn't be reacting this way if his words hadn't freaked me the fuck out." He crossed his arms over his chest. "Whatever, I don't care what you guys think. I think I deserve a fucking medal for not killing him."

Dr. Adams eyes widened but before he could say anything, John turned over in his seat and reached for Randy's hand. "Ran, I have always trusted your judgment and I will this time, too. If you think Dwayne said what he did for a reason, then I trust it's what you truly feel. However, maybe he was just trying to get a rise out of you like Brock was doing to me. Or, if he wasn't and really wants to come after me for some goddamned reason, let him! It all goes back to what I said earlier; they can't do anything to break us apart."

Randy stared at him for a moment before shrugging. "I know you're right, John but it doesn't stop making me worry. I want us to have peace in our lives and not worry about 3 dumbasses running around talking shit about us. It seems like just when things have calmed down in our relationship, something happens to fuck it up."

"Not this time," responded John quickly. "We have been through the worse of the worst already so those 3 dumbasses don't even faze me. We're good, Orton. Get it through your fucking skull already."

Randy slowly smiled and nodded. He squeezed John's hand lightly as their stares remain locked. It was only when the doctor cleared his throat that both men's gazes broke apart.

"Can I just ask one question? John, why were you and Dwayne hugging?"

"He found me in the locker room and wanted to talk. He apologized for not putting a stop to us getting together that night and told me that he hoped Randy and I had gotten over it. He also told me he hoped we could remain friends and hopefully work together again one day," John shrugged. "I found that weird since we were never really friends to begin with but I figured, what the hell. I accepted his apology and told him Randy and I were moving on together and were just fine. I asked him again to keep between us what had happened and he promised me he would."

Dr. Adams nodded. "And he seemed sincere? No doubt in your mind?"

John shook his head. "None at all,"

"Nothing to make you suspect he was trying to do anything but what he said and just apologize?" continued Dr. Adams.

John laughed and shook his head once more. "No, Doc. I think I would know if a guy was hitting on me. It's happened plenty in my life,"

"Conceited," mumbled Randy from where he sat.

John threw him a playful glare and leaned forward in his seat. "Randy and I already had this conversation the other night, too. He seems to think Dwayne has wanted me since the night we fell into bed together. I don't think so but frankly, I don't care. He could want me all he wants. I don't want him at all."

Dr. Adams smiled. "We can't play guessing games with people, boys. We also can't let wondering what other people are thinking drive us crazy. It seems like the last couple of weeks have been very interesting because you're both letting your minds run away with ideas. Stop doing that immediately or you're only in danger of hindering the recovery process of your marriage. These men have only the power you've given them over your relationship. None of them can interfere in it unless you let them. You both have to move on from what happened and as long as you're wondering what Brock, Cody or Dwayne are up to, you really aren't moving on at all. The betrayal you both put the other through will always be at the forefront of your relationship if you keep letting Brock, Cody and Dwayne into your heads." He shook his head over at John and Randy and sighed. "Didn't you mention that your daughter had already noticed some tension between the two of you? That alone should be the catalyst to focus only on moving forward."

Randy and John remained silent, both men's eyes trained on the floor after the doctor's lecture. Randy was the first to react by sighing softly and looking up.

"Do you think we're moving too fast? Do you think we need to slow things down or spend time apart again or…"

"Whoa, whoa!" interrupted John. His voice rose and he shook his head. "We are not spending time apart. That is not the answer and that is definitely what Alanna does not need. We can't work on our marriage by being apart, Randy!"

"I don't want to be apart from you, John! I want our life the way it's been; all of us together!" Randy's voice also rose. "I just don't want us to move so fast and convince ourselves we're ok if we're really not because in the end all that's gonna do is fuck us up for good!"

"Boys, stop!" Dr. Adams stood up and glanced down at his watch. "I never recommended spending time apart and I would never tell you that I think you're moving too fast. I have no idea how fast you're moving because I am not home with you. Only you two can be the judge of that. What I can tell you, though is that it's clear you still have many issues to work out. It's fine, though. No one said this process would take a month or two. There is no specific timeline for therapy."

"Yes, there is a timeline. Randy has me on one," replied John with a roll of his eyes.

"Don't give me crap about the timeline! You agreed to it, too," responded Randy, his eyes narrowed dangerously. "Anyway, it's not like I gave us a week. We agreed on 7 months, John and we still have 5 left. I would think in 5 months we would be at least somewhere close to normal! I don't think it's that much of an expectation!"

"Let's stop for today and pick up again tomorrow, boys." Dr. Adams sighed and walked over to the door. "Try to talk to each other calmly and if you see that's not possible, maybe spending a few days apart isn't a bad idea."

Randy stood up, an annoyed look on his face. He quickly exited the room, pushing past Dr. Adams and mumbling a goodbye. His feet carried him towards the elevator and he jabbed at the button angrily. He heard John's footsteps behind him but ignored the older man. The elevator finally opened and he stepped inside and turned around, his eyes avoiding John.

"Are you gonna ignore me now? Can you at least start ignoring after you tell me what I did because I really don't know," John crossed his arms against his chest and stared at Randy, the annoyance written over his face, as well.

Randy looked at him out of the corner of his eye and clenched his jaw tightly. "You just had to tell the doctor about the damn timeline."

John shrugged. "So what? I just wanted to let him know that in this case his 'there's no specific timeline for therapy' theory doesn't work."

"Really," Randy turned over, his eyes shooting daggers at John. "Or were you trying to drum up sympathy? Poor John; trying so hard to make his marriage work and evil Randy setting an expiration date on it."

John's eyes widened. "Are you fucking kidding me? You really think I would do that?"

"That's what it felt like. There was no reason to mention to him anything about our private timeline," responded Randy, turning away once more.

John stared at Randy in disbelief. The elevator doors opened Randy stepped out. John quickly grabbed his arm tightly, his nails digging into the skin of Randy's forearm. "You know what? Spending some time apart sounds like a really good idea right about now. We have one more day left here with Ally. We will spend it together then you will pack your shit and not only go on the road with her, but you will stay the hell away from Tampa and you won't come back home until I say so."

Randy's eyes widened and he glared at John. "Who the fuck do you think you are, John? You can't tell me not to come back to Tampa and you can't keep me away from the house! It's my house, too!"

John's grip tightened even more, if possible. "Don't come back until I say so, Randy. I'm not kidding." He let go of Randy's arm and turned around. Randy watched him walked away, mouth dropping open in shock.

**A/N: Gimme some reviews! Team Orton or Team Cena, LOL?**


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N: Still getting back on track after Hurricane Sandy but loving that I am able to write. Hope you enjoy!  
A/N 2: Wow, so much hate for the Doctor! Don't hate on the poor man. It's not his fault that's where Randy and John open up and let their insecurities out. Therapy is not an easy process and these two are totally proof. Things will get better soon for good…maybe. **

John paced around his moving bus, the Blackberry he held being twirled around and around in his hand. He glanced at the clock and figured he'd given Randy enough time to get back to his bus after the night's taping. His own bus was traveling the road only 50 miles from where Randy was working a Smackdown house show but John knew better than to try and meet up. The younger man had already made it clear that he wouldn't be appearing at Raw that week and John knew he wouldn't return to Tampa. There were many times Randy had done exactly the opposite of what John had asked out of anger but he knew this time wouldn't be one of them. Randy was just as angry as he was and not going to bow down any time soon.

The last day before the day they had to pack up and leave had been spent in mostly tense silence. John had awoken Alanna and spent the day outside of the house with her. The young girl didn't find it strange at all. Spending the entire day with John the day before he had to kiss her goodbye for the week was the norm and he was incredibly thankful for it. It wouldn't help matters at home if Alanna noticed even more strange behavior between her fathers and took it upon herself to share it with their family. For that reason alone, he had traveled almost all of Tampa with Alanna in an effort to exhaust her thoroughly before returning home and not risk her seeing the tension between him and Randy. His plan worked and by the time he had arrived home with her, she had only had enough energy to kiss Randy goodnight and collapse in bed. The next morning had gone smoothly, as well with Alanna not even noticing the pathetic excuse for a hug the men shared for her sake.

In the days that followed, they had fought to remain cordial to each other on the telephone or while on Skype together just for Alanna's sake. The politeness went out the window the minute she was gone and it had gotten worse as the days progressed. It was to the point that John's stomach churned at the time of the nightly call and as much as he racked his brain, he couldn't think of a way to call the fight to an end. While he wanted it over for his daughter's sake, he couldn't let Randy off the hook so easily. While he could learn to be patient and deal with Randy's concerns, he couldn't yet forgive him for everything else he'd said after leaving the doctor.

John collapsed on the sofa in the bus' lounge and took a deep breath before holding the phone up and dialing Randy's number. He listened to the phone ring a couple of times before Randy's voice finally answered. "Hey,"

"Hey, is Ally around?" responded John as he stared at the cars drive along the highway.

"Yeah, give her like 2 minutes. She's in the bathroom," replied Randy. The silence between the two men stretched into what seemed like hours until Randy spoke again. "Prepare yourself. She wants to know why me and her and going back to St. Louis but you're not. I told her I needed to take care of some things in the house there since we haven't been there for a bit but I don't think she bought it. I don't know what else to say to her to convince her."

John sighed, his eyes closing. "I knew it was too good to be true. She didn't notice anything off between us the last couple days at home but I knew she would find it weird that we were splitting again. I'll stick to your story and tell her I have some work stuff to do down here so it will be more fun for her in St. Louis. You can tell her you wanted to see Bob and Laney, too. That might help,"

"Yeah, I planned on throwing them in there, too. I hate lying to her so much." Randy's voice sounded tired as he answered and John frowned in response.

"I know you do. So do I. We don't have much of a choice, though, do we?"

"Yes, we do, John. We can put a stop this childish shit going on between us right now and I can get on a plane to Tampa on Wednesday morning," Randy sighed and lowered his voice. "Look, John, I'm sorry, OK. I know you weren't fishing for sympathy from Doc; you never fish for sympathy from anyone. I was just annoyed you told him about our timeline. I felt like it was something between us and that he shouldn't have to know. I was afraid it might make it seem to him like I didn't really want to make our marriage work and that's not the case. You know it's not. I am willing to do anything and try anything for as long as it takes. Just let me come home so we can work this out, please."

John inhaled sharply, shock written all over his face he was sure. He had never expected Randy to give in first, especially with such a detailed apology and explanation. The temptation to give in immediately was almost overwhelming but…

"Ran, I appreciate what you're saying and I understand. I still think we should spend a couple days away from each other, though. There's been too much tension between us lately and maybe some time apart will make it better," John fought against his every instinct telling him to stop what he was saying and continued on. "Maybe next week we can come back together and really sit and talk. I may go up to St. Louis after Raw. It's been awhile I don't stop in on your parents anyway."

Randy remained silent on the other end and John mentally prepared himself for the verbal lashing he would probably get from him now.

"OK. I'll put Al on now,"

John frowned, surprised not to have faced the younger man's wrath. He didn't have long to question it as his daughter soon commanded his attention.

"Hi, Daddy! Guess what I did today?"

John smiled and leaned back on the sofa, preparing himself for the conversation. "Hi, beautiful. Tell me,"

"I spent the morning with Daddy at the park and we played on the slide and on the swings and then I went to the show with Daddy and I had to stay with Angie but it was ok. We played with the dolls then we did our hair and then I colored my nails with a marker since I can't use polish but Daddy made me wash it off because he said it's kinda the same thing." Alanna stopped to take a breath and then asked, "Why are you staying in Florida but Daddy and I are going back to St. Louie?"

"Because I have some meetings and things to do, baby and I think you'll have more fun in St. Louie this week. You can spend some time with Mommy and Grandma and Grandpa and Daddy can take care of some stuff in the house," John sighed. "I'll see you really soon, though. You know I can't stay away from you for too long. I miss you too much."

"Me and Daddy right?" asked Alanna.

John groaned inwardly at his slip. Ever since explaining to her weeks earlier about his and Randy's problems, Alanna had been on her guard. Any sentiment John showed her had to also be directed at Randy and vice versa.

"Of course and Daddy, too, baby. I will miss you both so much," John tried to infuse some cheer into his voice as he continued. "Tell me more about your day, sweetheart."

* * *

It was days later as John sat in the dark, quiet house that he started regretting his decision. The home was so quiet with the noise of Alanna and Randy that he could hear a pin drop. It made John's mood drop considerately and he had spent the entire day curled up in bed, the house dark except for the lone light shining from the lamp on the nightstand. The television played quietly in the corner, only infomercials at such a late hour but John figured that noise was better than the silence that threatened to drive him crazy.

John glanced at the clock above the television and saw it was approaching 2 in the morning. He sighed, no nearer to sleep now than when he had first attempted almost 4 hours earlier. He turned over in the big bed and reached for his Blackberry on the nightstand. Before he could change his mind, he quickly dialed Randy's number and lifted the phone to his ear. Thankfully, the younger man answered before John could lose his nerve and end the call.

"Hey, what are you doing up so late?"

John closed his eyes at the sound of Randy's soft drawl. "I can't sleep. I should've told you to come back here. I'm miserable. I hate being in this huge house alone."

Randy remained silent for a few seconds before responding coldly, "Well, you wanted time apart. You got it, Cena."

John bit his lip, not surprised at Randy's lack of pity on his situation. "Does it make you happy to know I regret it?"

"John…" started Randy but John quickly cut him off. "Can I take it back? Can I blink and you magically be here in bed next to me?"

Randy let yet another silence between them stretch until finally saying, "Sorry, doesn't work like that. You're gonna have to deal with your choice. You wanted time apart and you're getting it. Besides, it's already helping with the tension. Our marriage is already getting back to normal. Can't you feel it? I feel it,"

John felt his lips curve into a smile at Randy's teasing, the coldness having disappeared from his tone. "I wish I could feel you right about now."

"John, you're starting to gross me out. If its phone sex that you're looking for, you know you're not gonna get it. You haven't gotten me to do that in 10 years and you're not gonna get it now," Randy's voice still sounded amused but John could detect a note of sternness. "Besides, I'm not kidding."

John sat up in the bed, his finger tracing circles on the comforter. "Neither am I. I wish you were here with me. Screw the tension and the time apart. I want you back, Randy."

"But you're right, John. We need to talk about our problems and fix them…I'm sick of the fighting. It isn't getting any better and we can't keep doing this."

John clenched the sheet in his hand subconsciously and shook his head. "I don't want to talk about that right now, Ran. I have faith we will work out whatever is wrong with us because we love each other. I love you, Ran. I can't imagine my life with anyone else. I know the same goes for you.

Randy sighed in his ear. "John, just stop it, please,"

John frowned to himself. "Why? Am I saying something that isn't true? I know you love me, Randy and I know you wish you were here just as bad as I do. You wanted to come home and I didn't let you and I regret it so much. I deserve the hell I'm going through right now but I'm a selfish asshole and I don't care. I will get dressed right now and drive to the airport…"

"John, enough! Will you listen to me?" barked Randy into John's ear.

John clamped his lips shut in order to stop spitting out every thought he had at once. He took a deep breath and relaxed back against the headboard. "I'm listening,"

"Johnny…" Randy sighed once more. "You're right; I love you and I wish I was in bed with you, too. It's the main reason I'm awake in my own bed right now. However, I think these couples of days apart have been good. Dr. Adams told us to think about things while we were apart and I have been doing that. I think, no I know one of the main reasons I've been so worried about Cody and Brock and Dwayne. It was hard to admit it to myself but I did and it didn't hit me the way I thought it would. I was actually ok with it and able to accept it."

"Do you want to share it with me?" asked John softly. "I promise to listen and not freak out…again."

"I think I worry so much about what others may do to our marriage because I worry so much about our marriage in general. I put you through hell and that was only when we were friends. I said some horrible things to you and made you suffer through hundreds of sleepless nights. I wonder if sometimes you think I'm gonna go back to that person. I didn't wonder before Brock came in the picture but when he did and you started watching me so carefully again…it felt like so many years before when I would tell you I wasn't high and you would give me that doubtful look. I guess it just bought back all my doubts and now I wonder sometimes if what people say is gonna get to you. I know people think you're crazy for marrying me and that some even tell you. They're so sure I'm gonna go back to who I was and they think you can do so much better than me because you're such an amazing man and I wonder if some perfect guy is gonna come along with a super clean past and sway you. I wonder…"

John sat upright and clenched his fist tightly. "And I wonder if your brain is made of fucking rocks, Randy."

"John,"

"No, now you're gonna listen and let me talk," interrupted John. "Randy, we all have a past. Yours is just a bit more colorful than some other peoples. That in no way makes you a bad person. You had some demons, Ran but you fought them and won. I, in no way, have ever held you responsible for anything you did when under the influence of drugs. I said some horrible things to you sometimes out of anger and I have always regretted it. You know I have because I've told you. I still feel like I failed you some days and as your friend, your best friend, I should've been there for you. However, you said you forgave me. We worked out our issues and I swore to you I would always stand by you and I made it clear that I would be there for you as you fought to get better, no matter how long it took. I made all these promises to you even before we were dating, Randy. I always loved you but I fell in love with you because of how strong and brave you are, even when you didn't think you were. That feeling has never gone away. If anything, it's grown stronger over the years and so did my promises to you. I don't care what anyone says; I never have. I've never been swayed by anyone else because there is no one else who can. I love you, Orton despite how crazy we drive each other. I want you forever not some squeaky clean guy who's supposed to be the definition of perfect. There's no such thing as perfect anyway."

"You come pretty close," mumbled Randy.

"Are you kidding me? I'm a freak, Randy and you know it." answered John with a laugh. "I drive you crazy. I'm impatient and I'm an anal, super control freak, I still need you for every fucking parenting decision I'm faced with, I've burned down our kitchen about 5 times already in both homes…I'm a mess!"

"Yeah, you are but you're my mess and I love you exactly the way you are. That's why I worry about someone taking you away from me…"

"Well, stop wondering. No one is gonna take me away from you. There is nothing any other guy can offer me that compares to what you do and nothing anyone says can make me doubt what I know is true; that the day I married you was the best day of my life and that we would live the rest of our lives together. " replied John. He slid off the bed and walked over to his computer, quickly firing it up. "Do you understand me?"

"I guess," responded Randy, laughing softly. "I know I promised you before but I'll promise again. I'll try to calm down about the 3 assholes in our lives. I trust you when you tell me I have nothing to worry about." He sighed softly and added, "Besides, it may just keep me out of jail because I'm so close to killing those 3, Dwayne being at the top of that list. If I see him with his hands on you one more fucking time, Cena…"

"I told you that you never would. His hands are the last thing I want on me," John smiled and bought the Skype program onto the computer screen. "Go to your computer. I'm gonna call you on Skype. If I can't physically be with you then I want to at least see you,"

"OK, give me a minute." Randy quickly ended the call on the cell phone and John threw his phone back on the bed. He dialed Randy's number and waited patiently for him to connect. Minutes later he was graced by his face on the computer screen. John smiled happily and leaned forward, his smile widening when Randy returned with a smile of his own. "Hey, gorgeous,"

Randy rested his chin on his hand as he stared back at John. "Hey. I wish I could be there with you now. I'm kinda done with the time apart."

John raised an eyebrow. "Don't joke around now, Ran. I'm not kidding when I say I'll hop on a plane right now…"

"So then hop," replied Randy with a smirk. "Get your ass over here, baby."

John quickly reached to the side of his laptop and grabbed his iPad. "Let me see what I can find…" He quickly brought to life the app for his favorite airline and scanned the flights leaving Tampa for St. Louis. "There's a flight leaving in 3 hours with a seat available…"

"Then get a move on, Cena. Don't bother to pack; just get on that plane. You won't be needing many more clothes than what you have here," Randy winked at him and laughed.

John quickly stood and stripped off his shirt, earning himself a loud wolf whistle from Randy. He smiled at the screen and quickly dropped the pajamas he wore to the ground. "Enjoying the view?"

"Always, baby. Enjoy nothing better,"

John ran around the room, iPad in hand as he purchased the tickets while quickly throwing on some clothes and dumping some necessities in a duffel bag. "OK, looks like we'll be having breakfast together in a few hours,"

"Can't wait, Johnny,"

John dropped the bag on the ground and took a seat one more time at the computer desk. He reached a finger forward and stroked the area where Randy's face filled the screen. "I miss you so much, Ran. You have no idea,"

"Trust me, I have an idea. I miss you just as much," Randy smiled at him and extended his own finger forward, to trace John's. "I want to be able to actually feel you,"

"Couple of hours, gorgeous; we'll both be able to throw ourselves in bed and just spend the day together and forget the rest of the world exists," John sighed as he pulled his hand away from the screen, his fingers literally aching to touch Randy's skin.

Randy nodded, the same look of longing in his eyes. "Hurry,"

"I will. See you in a bit, baby. I love you," responded John.

"Text me your flight details so I can track it, be careful and I love you, too. So much, Johnny," answered Randy.

John ended the call and quickly stood after shutting the lid on the computer. He picked up the duffel bag he'd dropped earlier and hurried out the door and to his family.

**A/N: Review! Happy Veterans Day weekend! Appreciate all our vets have done and continued to do for us! Much love to them! **


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N: Happy Friday!**

"_OK, Johnny, so tell me the truth. What do you really think about this house? Is this the one?"_

_John frowned and looked up at the large Tudor style home through the car window, the 8__th__ home he and Randy had looked at in the past 2 days. "I think so. This one is it. I can feel it in my bones…"_

_Randy rolled his eyes. "Does that mean we're putting an offer in? Be sure, John."_

_John's frown softened and reached over to grab Randy's hand. "I'm sure. This is our home, Ran. I can see us building a long, happy life here,"_

"_Is that so?" asked Randy with a small smile. He rested his head on the car seat and stroked John's hand. "Why?"_

_John shrugged. "I can just feel it. This is our home and we're gonna raise Ally here and get married here and have more kids here and grow old here…"_

"_Oh God. The ink on my divorce papers isn't even dry yet, John," responded Randy with a laugh. "How did I go from being homeless in my own city to agreeing to share a home with you here and in Tampa to talking about something stable like growing old and getting married?"_

"_Hey, if I'm moving too fast, let me know but I know that's our future like I know my name is John." John's smile morphed into a smirk. "We're meant to be, Orton. We have been from day 1 and it's about time you get on board with that idea."_

"_I have no problem with that idea now," Randy lowered his voice, his eyes turning towards the house. "I would like nothing more than some stability in my life after the past few months."_

"_Well, you're gonna get it, Ran. Things are gonna get better, I promise you," John shifted as close as he could to Randy's seat, the partition in the middle making anything more impossible. "It's just you and me now, kid."_

_Randy smiled and shook his head. "You're so corny, Cena. Why do I want to build a life with you?" His smile quickly faded and he frowned. "Maybe I should be asking why you want to build a life with me…"_

"_Because I love you, Ran," responded John without thinking. Randy's eyes locked onto his, widened in shock and surprise. "What? How…Don't say that!"_

"_I know it's fast but…it's the truth," John sighed and shook his head. "Look, Ran, I've always loved you. It was always just as a question of how. It started as a friend then it grew into love brothers would share but over the years it grew into more. I love you like a man I want to have a relationship with and try for a future with and be intimate with…" He trailed off as Randy's eyes lowered. "In time, I mean. I just…I love you, Ran. Your past means nothing to me. All I care about is your future because I know I'm in it."_

"_I've screwed up so much. I ruined my marriage; Sam hates me…how can you think I won't ruin any future we could have? You could hate me, too, one day." asked Randy softly, his worried gaze coming up to meet John's. _

"_Because you're all better now. You're different now, Ran. That guy before messing things up wasn't you. I know the real you and he's amazing. I want to build a future with him," John smiled and nodded. "Trust me,"_

_Randy's gaze slowly relaxed. "I have a long way to go, John. I just got out of rehab and I'm not working yet…I don't even know if McMahon is gonna want me back…I have a newborn and I just got divorced! I have no clue what I'm doing with my life. My only goal is to stay clean right now." _

"_I'll be with you every step, Ran, I promise. Everything will work out," John tugged Randy forward and rested their foreheads together. "Can you trust that; can you trust us?"_

_Randy tilted his head slightly, letting his lips graze over John's. "Yes, I can….mostly because I trust you." He pulled back slightly and smiled. "I love you, too John."_

* * *

John smiled as he parked the car in his driveway, the memory of when he first saw the house that would become his and Randy's still fresh in his mind. He had never thought St. Louis would become home to him, especially after the only home he'd ever known in the city had suddenly become a warzone.

After Randy and Sam made it known their marriage was over, Randy has quickly handed her over their home. He had made the mistake of letting her know he would be purchasing a new one with John and the sweet woman John had once considered a friend made it clear that was no more. While she was not in love with Randy any longer, she still found it difficult to accept that he was now going to be with someone else who happened to be a man. It had made the tension between them almost unbearable since Randy insisted on John joining him whenever they went to visit Alanna. The tension between him and Sam had spilled over and it got to the point that John's stomach dreaded even coming home to St. Louis. The only positive about it was getting to see Alanna and the smile on Randy's face whenever they were in his hometown. Things soon changed, thankfully and he grew to love the city and the home he built in it as much as his Tampa home.

John let the door slam behind him as he exited the car. He rushed towards the house, not bothering to pull out the duffel bag he'd dragged along from Tampa. The minute he entered the house, the smell of coffee and breakfast filled his senses. He could hear Alanna and Randy's chatter as he approached the kitchen and though he barely got a couple hours of sleep on the plane, his step quickened with a burst of energy. John peeked around the corner, his eyes landing on Randy and Alanna at the kitchen island eating breakfast while talking about their plans for the day. He savored the sight before his eyes for a few seconds before making his presence known.

"Hello, my loves,"

Randy and Alanna's heads both spun around at the sound of his voice. Alanna's eyes widened and she squealed in excitement as she jumped off her seat and ran into John's open arms. John smiled happily as he pulled her into the hug. His eyes lifted up to lock onto Randy's face as he stood, the younger man slowly smiling as well.

"Daddy! What are you doing here? You told me you weren't coming!"

John pulled back from Alanna's fierce embrace and pressed a kiss to the side of her head. "Well, I couldn't stand being away from you and Dad for any longer so I finished my work early and came home."

Alanna wrapped her arms tightly around John's neck once more. "I'm so happy you did, Daddy!"

John stood up, Alanna still in his arms. "So am I, beautiful," He slowly approached the side on the large counter to where Randy stood. "What about you? Are you happy?"

Randy nodded and started forward, meeting John halfway. "Very, very happy." He smiled and leaned forward to place a soft kiss on John's lips before pulling back with a smirk. "Much better than Skype,"

John smiled and nodded. "Much better," He forced his eyes to peel away from Randy's face and back down onto his daughter. "So, what are your plans for today?"

Before Alanna could answer, Randy did. "She's spending the day with Grandma. I think something having to do with shopping and going to a spa," He shrugged and locked eyes with John once more. "Do you mind if she goes out with Mom today? It will give you a chance to get some stuff done around here or get some rest if you didn't on the plane…or anything else you want to do."

Randy raised an eyebrow at John and smiled slowly as he let his gaze travel down the older man's body and hover over his crotch. John's eyes widened when the meaning behind Randy's words finally dawned on him. "Oh, right! No, of course I don't mind. You can have lots of fun with Grandma while I get some stuff done here with Daddy."

Alanna nodded and slid out of John's arms. "What kind of stuff are you and Daddy gonna do?"

John shrugged and tried to avoid Randy's smirking face. "Just paperwork or something. Nothing for you to worry about. You just concentrate on having fun with Grandma today." He looked over at Randy. "Is Laney coming to pick her up or do we have to take her? I can drive Ally over. It will give me a chance to see her."

Randy nodded. "Sounds good. I can clean up here while you two are gone." His eyes traveled over the counter and a small grimaced formed on his face as he saw the breakfast mess he and his daughter had made. A sigh escaped him as he turned his attention to Alanna, "Are you done, Al? Go get cleaned up and ready so Daddy can drive you to Grandma's."

Alanna nodded and quickly ran off, leaving Randy and John alone for the first time since the older man's arrival. John watched her disappear on the second landing before closing the gap between him and Randy and pulling him into his arms. Without a word, he cupped Randy's face in his hands and kissed him fiercely. Randy wrapped his arms around John's back, running his hands under his shirt. He felt John shiver as his fingers trailed over the firm muscles of his back and around to his stomach. Randy pulled away from the kiss and trailed his lips down the side of John's face to his neck and sucked on the side gently.

"God, I fucking missed you so much. Don't do this me now, though. Can't show up at Mom's house with wood, baby." said John through a groan.

Randy laughed and kissed John softly on the lips before pulling away. "Fine, ruin my fun. You better get your ass back home fast, though, Cena. Don't stay with my Dad all day now."

John shook his head and pulled Randy back to him, kissing him tenderly. "I won't. I plan on enjoying our free day together." He sighed and rested their foreheads together. "When will we learn to stop the fighting? It's so obvious we can't be away from each other,"

John pulled back, his eyes sad, and shook his head. "I love you so much, Ran."

Randy ran his fingers down John's face and traced his lips. "I love you, too, Johnny. I think we'll get it at one point."

John smiled and kissed the tip of Randy's finger as it passed over his lips. He rested his head on Randy's shoulder, enjoying the warmth of their bodies as they hugged. The calm moment was over too soon as Alanna bust back into the kitchen. "OK, I'm ready to go!"

John sighed and nodded, reluctantly pulling away from the warmth of Randy's embrace. "All right, sweetheart, let's go."

He reached for Alanna's hand after she kissed Randy goodbye. Sending Randy a wink, John turned and walked out of the house. He tried to focus on Alanna's words as she went on about her day but his mind kept wandering back to Randy at home. There was nothing he wanted to do more than to be with the younger man…and it wasn't only about falling into bed with him.

"Dad! Listen to me!"

John looked down at Alanna as she frowned at him. He smiled guiltily and nodded as they pulled out of the driveway and headed for the Orton family home. A couple mumbled answers and well placed sounds of agreement allowed him relief from any more of Alanna's scolding as she continued on with her chatter, convinced he was listening.

As they drove onto the block where the Orton home was, a sudden pain settled in the pit of John's stomach. His love for Bob and Elaine Orton was without question but he wondered what exactly he would be walking into at that moment. It had been months he didn't stop by to see them and even phone calls to them had been short. He didn't doubt that Elaine noticed and he could only hope he would be spared from her inquisition. John knew it would be worse than Sam's but there was no way to avoid it now.

Taking a deep breath in front of the Orton home driveway, John shut off the car engine. He looked at Alanna, already unbuckling her seatbelt and then slowly exited the car. Alanna skipped ahead of him to the front door and let herself in the house with a scream of, "Grandma!"

John entered slowly behind her and shut the door. He followed Alanna at a slower pace to the kitchen where Elaine had her in her arms. He smiled tentatively as their eyes locked, Elaine's widening immediately.

"John! Randy didn't tell me you were here!"

John shook his head and walked over to her, embracing her tightly. "I flew in this morning. I missed my family too much to stay away."

Elaine smiled and lowered Alanna to the counter. "Well, aren't you a doll? I'm actually really happy you did fly in because Randy was walking around like a zombie yesterday and our little princess here had on a giant pout."

John smiled more at ease now as he lowered his body onto a seat. "It's nice to know I'm missed. Trust me, I miss them just as much when we're not together." He shrugged. "Besides, I also miss my St. Louis mom and dad so I had plenty of reasons to come home."

Elaine crossed her arms over her chest and sighed. "Well, that's really nice to hear. I was starting to think otherwise."

John's smile slowly dropped and he groaned inwardly. "Why would you think that?"

Elaine raised an eyebrow and shrugged. "Well, darling…I haven't seen you in months and Randy keeps making excuses for you not being around. He's clearly lying to me and I can tell. You know he's never been the best actor."

"Don't let him hear you say that," responded John with a small laugh. "I really have just been busy, Mom. It was easier for me to stay on the road while Randy and Ally came home to be with you guys, at least. Then, when things calmed down, we all just stayed in Tampa." He tried to maintain steady eye contact with her and pushed away the guilt he felt at lying to her.

"Let's not make that a constant, John. Don't forget you have a home and a family here, as well," scolded Elaine sternly. "It's also not good for a marriage for a couple to spend so much time apart."

John smiled. "I thought distance makes the heart grow fonder?"

Elaine narrowed her eyes at him, not amused by his question. "I don't agree with that."

"I know; I'm just kidding," John sighed. "Randy and I won't be doing that anymore, don't worry. We've decided to cut back on work and focus on us more."

"Glad to hear that," Elaine slowly relaxed her glare. "You and Randy should know by now that a marriage and family take precedence to anything else; if you want that marriage to last, that is."

"We do, Mom," replied John with a smile.

"Grandma, can we go now?"

John let out a sigh of relief as Alanna distracted her Grandmother's attention. He quickly stood up and placed a kiss on her head. "I'll take off now and stop distracting Grandma. You girls have a wonderful day," He walked around the counter and kissed Elaine's cheek. "Give us a call and we'll come pick her up."

"Or I can just drop her off when we're done," Elaine shrugged and walked around the counter.

"Either way, give us a call. Randy and I have…things to do at home," John smiled, a blush coming onto his cheeks.

Elaine rolled her eyes and shook her head. "Get out, John. I don't need to know that."

John laughed and waved as he exited the living room and continued outside of the house. He climbed back in the car and drove home as fast as the speed limit would allow, happy that he had avoided any more questioning from Elaine and that he and Randy would have the house to themselves for the whole day.

When he arrived at the house, he found Randy in the exact location he'd left him; the kitchen. Randy turned towards him, a small smirk on his face as he dried his hands on a towel. "I can't believe Mom let you out so soon…or at all. I didn't think you would escape her clutches so easily."

"Should never doubt me, baby. I could've escaped anyone's clutches today. I knew I had you to come home to," responded John as he walked towards Randy.

The younger man rolled his eyes and shook his head. "What a cornball, Cena,"

John shrugged and grabbed Randy's hand, tugging him forward. "Yes, I am. Doesn't matter right now, though. Let's go upstairs!" He pulled Randy forward but the younger man didn't budge. John turned to look over at his face and frowned. "What's wrong?"

Randy sighed and lowered his gaze. "I've been thinking and…I don't know if we should do this, John. We still have so many unresolved issues and having sex won't solve them…maybe we should just sit and talk for awhile…"

John felt his stomach drop. His entire being protested it but he slowly nodded. "Uh…OK…I understand. I know we have a lot of issues, Ran and I swear to you that we'll keep on working on it because I love you and I want nothing more than to fix us because I love no one more than you and want no one but you…"

"Stop, John," Randy held up a hand and shook his head. "Talking is good but I think maybe what will work is if we really do spend some time apart. Maybe you should've stayed in Tampa…"

John's eyes widened and his mouth dropped open. "What? Are you kidding me? Now you wanna do the time apart thing again? You said you didn't; that you missed me and wanted me to come home and I did for the same reasons! What is wrong with you? Are you purposely trying to drive me crazy?"

Randy stared at John intently as he ranted on. He tried to keep his face expressionless but the look of aggravation mixed with confusion on John's face was too much for him to bear and he burst into laughter.

John stared at Randy as he laughed, his aggravation only increasing. "What are you doing? Are you seriously laughing at me right now? Is this a fucking joke to you?"

Randy nodded, his laughter slowly dying down. "Yes,"

John glared at Randy in annoyance. "Are you kidding? I don't find this funny, Randy."

"I do," replied Randy, finally stopping. "It was too easy to let you have it, Cena." He shrugged and leaned on the side on the counter. "Besides, you deserve it. You didn't let me come home when I first asked and made me spend days alone.

John clenched his jaw tightly and shook his head. "You're such a jerk,"

"Yet you love me," Randy shrugged and moved closer to John, pulling him in close and letting their bodies press together. "Let's go upstairs," He tugged John forward and pulled him up the stairs, a smile on his face.

John felt his anger disappear the minute the words came out of Randy's mouth and he quickly followed the younger man to their bedroom. Randy's lips latched onto his the minute they burst inside and John moaned low in his throat, breathless by the time they broke apart.

"God, baby, you're driving me crazy,"

"That was kind of my plan," said Randy with a chuckle. Diving back in, he bit down on John's neck until he heard a soft sigh of pleasure from him. Pushing his hands higher, Randy quickly stripped John of his shirt and tossed it to the floor. Randy pushed back on John, pinning him down on the bed and letting their bodies slide over each other. Randy pressed his lips against John's as their lovemaking escalated. He suddenly ripped off his own shirt and tossed it aside, desperately needing to feel the touch of John's body against him.

John pressed his hand flat against Randy's stomach and rubbed it slowly. Randy let out a little shiver as John's hand trailed its way up to cup Randy's face. John leaned down, pausing only long enough to see the want in Randy's now darkened eyes. He closed the gap between them and crushed their lips together, pulling Randy's body tight against his.

Randy threw his arms around John's neck. Their tongues wrestled together as John forced Randy down onto his back. He covered his body with his own, letting his tongue explore Randy's warm mouth. The soft moaning noises Randy made caused his hips to move involuntarily and John ground his crotch into Randy's, feeling their shafts grow together.

Randy kissed John back with ferocity, biting and sucking on John's lower lip. John let out a slow groan and pulled away, his lips moving down Randy's neck. His tongue dipped down into Randy's throat, causing the younger man's back to arch sharply. Randy reached down and made quick work of the fly on John's pants, tugging them down over his hips. John pulled back to take a breath and looked down at his husband, whose eyes were full of lust and hunger.

"I want you, John." Randy moaned out.

His words sent shivers all through John's body. He kissed down the side of Randy's neck, latching his mouth down on the base, just above his collar bone and started sucking and nibbling on it, pulling at the tender skin with his teeth. Randy let out another moan as he worked John's pants down further, using his feet to push them off completely.

John kissed his way down Randy's chest, pausing to give his nipple a gentle tug with his teeth. Randy slid his hands down John's solid abs and into his boxers. He let out a deep groan when his fingers made contact with John's warm, hard cock. He grasped it firmly and started stroking it slowly, letting his fingertips drag up and down the length of it. He was rewarded with a low, growling moan from the man on top of him.

John's lips made their way up to Randy's ear, he started kissing and biting as hard as he could without breaking the skin. Randy started squirming and tugged at John's cock.

"John," he moaned softly, "I want you in my mouth."

John let out a little purring sound against Randy's ear and gave him one last rough, tooth-crushing kiss. He wiggled out of his boxers and stood up, grabbing Randy's hands and pulling him up onto his knees.

Randy brushed his lips over John's hips, causing the older man to shiver. John slid his fingers into Randy's hair, pulling his head closer to his hips, trying to direct his mouth to the place he most desired it. Randy ignored the gesture and trailed his lips over John's hipbone, where he bit down gently. John let out another moan and thrust his hips forward slightly, brushing the length of his cock along Randy's cheek.

Randy reached up and wrapped his fingers around John's cock, pumping it slowly. He slowly dragged the flat of his tongue over his balls and up the underside of his shaft. John let out an appreciative moan and watched intently as Randy's mouth closed around the head of his cock, sucking gently and twirling his tongue around the head. His teeth grazed the sensitive flesh, making John tremble.

"Please, Randy. No more teasing," John panted.

Randy smirked slightly as he slowly took John's shaft into his mouth. He moaned at the taste and dug his fingertips into his hips, bobbing his head slowly and picking up a rhythm. He kept his tongue in constant contact with John's cock and sucked on it each time he pulled his head back.

John gripped Randy's head more tightly and started moving his hips in quick little thrusts. His body was covered in sweat and he never took his eyes off his husband. Randy tilted his head back and relaxed, letting John fuck his throat. John moaned and panted, tensing a little each time his head slid down the back of Randy's throat. Randy closed his eyes and enjoyed the feeling of John's thick cock sliding in and out of his mouth. He pulled back so just John's head was resting on his tongue. He started sucking on him roughly and pumped John's cock with eager anticipation. John let out one last, moan and bucked his hips, shooting cum into Randy's mouth. Randy kept sucking gently as John softened in his mouth. John withdrew slowly and grabbed Randy's biceps, pulling him up to his feet.

Randy wrapped his arms around the John and cuddled into the warmth of his body. John gently stroked his hair and placed soft kisses all over his face. Randy tilted his head up for a kiss, which John eagerly gave. Randy parted his lips at the request of John's tongue and they stood there, bodies pressed tight together, tongues exploring each other.

When John finally caught his breath, he looked down into Randy's eyes, pressing their forehead together. "You have no clue how fucking amazing you make me feel." His voice has a sexy, husky tone to it that made Randy shiver.

Randy leaned up and kissed John roughly, rubbing his palms all over his sweat-slicked back.

"Right back at you," he said in a whisper.

John pushed Randy down onto the bed gently, his arms still around him. "I want you forever, Ran. You're mine forever,"

Randy smiled, pressing his face into the bigger man's neck. "I want to be yours," he mumbled. He kissed along John's throat, grazing his teeth over the skin. "I've always wanted to be yours, you know that. I was scared and so stupid when younger. If I would've just admitted to myself that I had feelings for you maybe I wouldn't have done all the dumbass shit I did in my life…"

"Stop, Ran. No thinking about what-ifs, OK. We're together now and we always will be and that's all that matters," replied John quickly. He nuzzled his face into Randy's neck and pressed a kiss onto the skin. Randy let out a moan as John began to suck, his cock swelling. He ground his erection against John's stomach, causing John to suck even harder.

John pulled his head back and lifted his body over Randy's. He took hold of Randy's shaft and started stroking it slowly, enjoying the noises escaping Randy's lips. He began kissing all over Randy's torso, across his abs and over his chest, giving a quick nip to his nipple. He slid down Randy's body, pushing his legs wide open, stroking his shaft slowly but firmly. John slowly licked over Randy's puckered hole, tightening his hand around Randy's throbbing shaft.

Randy moaned deeply and rocked his hips, trying to make John stroke him faster, but John just held his hips still with his free hand and kept stroking slowly. John finally relented and took the head of Randy's throbbing cock into his mouth. He ran his teeth over the skin gently and massaged the tip of his tongue into the slit as Randy writhed against the bed. John gently started bobbing his head, taking every inch Randy had to offer into his mouth and down his throat. He bobbed his head faster, massaging his tongue along the length of Randy's cock as it slid rhythmically in and out of his mouth. Randy was panting and groaning, pulling at the sheets on the bed at this point, occasionally giving a little thrust of his hips to try and force himself deeper into his lover's mouth.

John could feel Randy was close. He was thrashing on the bed and moaning constantly. He held Randy's shaft in his throat, making soft moaning and purring noises, stimulating Randy's shaft with his throat muscles. He soon lost control and grabbed John's head, giving one quick, forceful thrust as he came down his throat. John pulled back, panting and slightly out of breath. He stroked Randy gently, licking him clean as he came down from his climax.

"God, I love you, Johnny."

John smiled and kissed Randy's forehead. "I love you too, handsome."

Randy curled up against John's body, smiling when his thigh brushed his cock. He reached down and wrapped his fingers around John's throbbing erection. He started pumping it slowly, taking delight in the little moans that came from his lips. He leaned up and started nibbling on his neck, causing John to squirm, "Baby…"

"I need you, John," Randy whispered huskily. "I want you inside me."

John nodded and reached over to the nightstand, pulling a bottle of lube out of the drawer. He smiled and settled himself between Randy's legs, kissing him deeply. He trailed a line of kisses all down Randy's chest and side. Randy let out a deep moan and raised his hips.

John nibbled at the skin on Randy's thigh and popped the bottle open. He squirted a generous amount of lube onto his hand and lathered it all around his shaft, biting down on Randy's inner thigh. He quickly squirted more onto his fingers and slipped his hand between Randy's legs. He massaged his fingertip around the twitching hole. Randy let out a loud moan and wiggled his ass slightly.

John slowly worked one finger inside. After a few minutes he added a second. Randy was sweating and writhing on the bed, pushing down to meet John's fingers as he thrust them gently inside. He slowly started to scissor his fingers, stretching the tight hole. A few minutes of this and Randy couldn't wait anymore. He pulled on John's head roughly. "Please, John. Now! I don't need any more!"

John dragged his body over Randy's and lined his cock up with the tight hole. He grabbed onto Randy's aching shaft and stroked him slowly, kissing his neck. Randy spread his legs more as John pressed his hips forward, letting the head of his cock pop inside. Randy gasped slightly but remained relaxed as John slowly inched in.

John tugged on Randy's shaft, stroking him slowly but firmly as the younger man rolled his hips. When John had edged all the way in, he stayed his hips for a few moments to allow Randy to adjust but Randy quickly started rocking his hips, needing the movement.

John smiled and started thrusting slowly in and out of his lover. He'd let his head pop out each time before thrusting back in fully. Randy groaned in frustration. "More, John. I need more."

John began kissing Randy's already kiss-swollen lips. He nibbled and tugged and sucked on them, making them redder. He picked up his pace, pulling out only half way before slamming back into his roughly. Each time the base of his cock reached Randy's hole, he'd roll his hips to brush his head over Randy's prostate.

Randy panted and clenched himself down around John's cock. He clutched John's back, digging his fingertips into his shoulder blades, letting out a little moan each time John slammed home.

John moved his hips quickly, slamming in and out of Randy with a frantic fury. Randy could feel John's quick strokes to his shaft bringing him closer to the edge. It was only minutes later that he screamed his lover's name and came onto his stomach and chest. His ass rippled and clenched around John's cock, causing him to explode, as well, giving one last thrust as his cum filled Randy.

John collapsed on top of his husband. They were both panting and sweating, their legs tangled together. They kissed, a little more gently now in the afterglow of their orgasms. Their tongues twirled and wrestled together slowly as they worked on calming their breathing.

John pulled his head back and looked down at his lover. He was flushed and smiling.

"Very good, Cena," Randy whispered quietly.

John laughed and shook his head, kissing him once more. "Right back at you,"

**A/N: That was the longest sex scene I think I've written in a while. I deserve some REVIEWS, LOL!**


	25. Chapter 25

**A/N: Sorry for the long update wait! Preparing for Holidays!**

Randy tilted his head from side to side, stretching his muscles as he tuned out the noise in the crowded Smackdown locker room. He focused on his breathing and letting it keep his thoughts calm. There was no other choice for him, really. John wasn't around this time to help him calm. Even though if he really thought about it, having John around would probably only make him more anxious.

The men had spent their final day together with Ally visiting Randy's parents and proving to them once more that things were normal between the couple. John had made it clear that it seemed like Elaine still had her doubts about them and Randy had agreed. He knew his mother already suspected trouble in the couple and that one visit from John wasn't going to be enough to convince her otherwise. Randy could only hope that the day they spent with her had settled her down enough so she at least didn't worry.

As the time came to part, both men prolonged it as long as possible. Randy's previously booked media appearances and meetings would keep him away from Raw that week so he and John prepared themselves to spending 5 days apart after dropping Alanna off with Sam. Whereas Randy once was a big believer in letting couples have some distance between them to keep the relationship fresh, this time he was completely against it. There was nothing he wanted more than to stay by John's side; especially that week. After being away from him because of huge fight, spending more time apart when they still had things to work out didn't seem like a good idea.

However, that feeling had slowly started dissipating when he'd entered the arena that afternoon and Randy saw his scheduled opponent. Hours later after the weekly Smackdown Creative meeting, he was practically down on his knees thanking God John wasn't there and that his own booked calendar kept him from coming to meet him on the Smackdown set.

"How long does it take you to stretch your neck? We only have the ring booked for so much time, you know and we have to go over our match,"

Randy opened his eyes slowly, already annoyed by the sound of the voice interrupting his search for peace. He met Cody's smirking face and groaned inwardly before taking a deep breath. "I'm done. I don't understand why we need to go over anything, though."

Cody turned over and headed for the locker room door. "Probably because I don't want to end up with a broken neck after our match."

Randy narrowed his eyes as he followed the younger man out the door. "If you keep making comments like that you'll end up with a broken neck before we even get down to the ring."

Cody spun around, his eyes boring into Randy's. "Don't, Randy. I'm not fucking playing around with you. This is my life we're talking about!"

Randy rolled his eyes and sighed. "I would never hurt anyone in the ring, Cody. Don't be so goddamned dramatic."

Cody stared at Randy silently for a few second before turning over and continuing down the hall. "Whatever. Maybe you should just follow my lead out there so they'll be no problems."

"Fine, Cody. If that's what it's gonna take for you to shut up, then I'll just follow your lead." Randy ignored Cody shooting him yet one more glare and turned his attention to his pocket. He pulled out his phone and smiled when he saw the picture of Alanna and message Sam had forwarded him and John.

"_Look at our brilliant girl holding up her Student of the Month certificate!"_

"Is that Ally? My God, look how big she's gotten!"

Randy's smile dropped instantly and he quickly put the phone back in his pocket at Cody's exclamation. He quickened his step, wanting to put as much distance between him and his former friend as he mumbled an answer. "Yeah, she is,"

Cody didn't seem to notice his willingness to want distance and continued. "I guess this is the age when they just sprout up from one day to the next. I'll never forget when Kota was little. I wouldn't see her for a couple of weeks and when I did get home to see her it was like she grew 3 feet. It's so amazing." He looked over at Randy and smiled. "It's also nice to see things are good between you and John and Sam."

Randy remained silent, walking out onto the ramp and staring down at the ring. He tuned out Cody's voice as he continued to chatter and wished for the hundredth time that day that he could go into Hunter's office and beg him to change the upcoming storyline he had with Cody. He knew that Hunter would convince Stephanie and get her to put him in another feud but Randy knew it would come at a cost. He would have to tell him why he was so reluctant to work with Cody; someone Hunter assumed was still one of Randy's closest friends. Telling Hunter, his mentor and one of the men he looked up to most in the business the whole story about his and John's trouble was just something neither he nor John wanted to do. It seemed much easier to just go through the storyline and let it die…and it was exactly what he knew he could do. It wouldn't be the first time he'd had to work with someone he didn't like. It would, however, be the first time he'd had to work with someone he'd slept with…besides John.

"I miss seeing Ally, though. We always had so much fun together. You should bring her around more often."

Randy stopped and took a deep breath, not following Cody into the empty ring. "Can you please stop talking about my daughter? Just talk about the match, Cody. There's no need to talk about Alanna."

Cody leaned against the ring ropes and frowned down at him. "I was just making conversation, Randy."

"Well, don't! Don't make conversation with me; especially about my daughter! Her name should not be crossing your lips. Talk to me about wrestling or don't talk to me at all!" Randy's voice rose with frustration and he noticed the men setting up equipment around the arena stop to stare at him. He felt his face warm with a blush and quickly lowered his tone. "Stop talking to me like we're still friends, Cody. That ship sailed months ago, you know that. We're co-workers talking about work and that's it."

Cody's frown softened and a different look replaced it on his face, one that Randy couldn't place. He nodded slowly and said, "I'm sorry. It's just a habit. It's hard to let go of so many years of friendship because of one day. I'm still getting used to it."

Randy involuntarily took a step back at the somber tone coming out of Cody's mouth. He pushed away the guilt he felt and shook his head. "Look, we don't need to go over anything. We worked together for years and we'll be fine in the ring. I'll just follow your lead, OK."

Cody shrugged and slid out of the ring. "Fine. I'll do the same if you wanna change things up." He turned and headed towards the exit through the seats that would soon be occupied by the thousands of fans expected that night.

Randy watched him go and groaned, annoyed at himself for feeling even an ounce of pity for the younger man. He spun on his heel and stalked back up the ramp, moving quickly through the more crowded halls and bursting into the locker room once more. Startled eyes landed on him but no one dared approach him as he strode towards his locker. Randy angrily pulled the trunks he had chosen for the night out of his bag along with his boots.

The loud bang as he dropped the boots unceremoniously on the ground coincided with the clap on his back and Randy spun around in surprise, grabbing the hand that touched him. Ted stared back at him, eyes wide as he pulled his hand back roughly.

"Hey…it's just me."

Randy sighed and dropped the t-shirt he held in his hands back into his bag. He lowered his body to the bench in front of his locker and shook his head. "Sorry. I'm just a little on edge tonight."

Ted frowned and cautiously lowered himself down beside Randy. "No shit. Any particular reason?"

Randy shrugged. "Just the usual drama surrounding my life. I'm starting some new program with Cody and it's driving me crazy. Add that to the fact that my brain is focused on John and I'm a mess."

"Your brain is always focused on John. I certainly hope he thinks about you as much as you think about him," responded Ted with an eye roll as he grimaced.

"Ted, please, don't start tonight. I can't deal with your shit too." Randy let his eyes close momentarily before opening them and locking them onto Ted's. "I'm starting to feel like I can't talk to you, Ted. I don't want to feel that way."

"You can talk to me about anything, Ran. What are you talking about?" Ted frowned and slid closer to Randy. "We're best friends."

Randy raised an eyebrow and took a deep breath before speaking. "John and I had another fight…"

"I knew it." interrupted Ted, shaking his head.

"But we fixed it!" added Randy quickly. Ted looked at him doubtfully and Randy sighed. He lowered his voice and crossed his arms over his chest. "You're not being a best friend right now, Ted."

"On the contrary, I think I am. Being pissed that my best friend's husband treats him like shit makes me a great best friend, Randy." Ted's angry gaze didn't soften. "What the hell was it this time?"

"I'm not even gonna tell you because you're not gonna listen. I think you get a kick out of telling me you knew we were gonna have another fight," Randy went to stand but Ted's arm reached out and pulled him back in. "I would never, Ran. I just get so pissed at John…I'll listen if you wanna talk."

Randy glared at Ted and held up a finger. "Do not interrupt me until I'm done."

Ted nodded and leaned back, an expectant look on his face.

"He told the doctor about our timeline and I flipped out. I thought he was fishing for sympathy and I told him so. He told me not to go to Tampa so after last Tuesday I went to St. Louis with Al. I tried to get him to just end the fight but he didn't give in so we spent most of the week apart until yesterday. We spoke on the phone the night before and it was clear we were both miserable so he hoped on a plane and we worked things out." Randy shrugged. "Well, as much as we could. We still have a lot of talking to do but we agreed to stop these stupid little fights and really focus on talking."

Ted nodded and remained quiet. Randy sighed in relief and let out a breath slowly. "We're gonna be apart this loop since I'm not on Raw and I won't see him till late Wednesday. Part of me is happy because I can't deal with having him react badly to this Cody storyline but part of me wishes he was here because not only does he keep me calm but this is something I think he needs to face. If I can make my peace with it, John's gonna have to, as well."

Ted remained silent and nodded once more. Randy sat back and smiled. "OK, I know you're dying to talk so just do it. Let me have it; all your opinions."

Ted shrugged. "Hey, if you're gonna ask…"

"I'm asking," interrupted Randy, his smile widening. "Go ahead, asshole."

Ted laughed and shook his head. "Look, Ran, all I heard in that story is you telling me you tried apologizing to John but because it wasn't convenient for him, he didn't forgive you until he started to get uncomfortable and miss you. The other thing I'm hearing is, as usual, you trying to cater to and protect John's feelings with no regards to your own. I hate how you put John before yourself all the time. It's not healthy, Ran."

Randy frowned and shook his head. "Ted, I'm not a saint. I put John through years of shit and for all those years, he was the one putting me before him. Many times he apologized to me after a fight I caused just because he wanted peace between us and I was a brat who made him wait until I felt like it before giving in. John deserves the care and respect I have for his feelings and he has a right to them. I can't knock him for getting angry at me when I fly off the handle the same way he does…or even worse sometimes!"

Ted shrugged. "Fine, Ran, whatever you say. I get that you want your marriage to John to be forever but I just worry. I don't see him giving you the same care and respect; physically or emotionally."

"I can't talk about this anymore," Randy sighed. "Can we switch from one annoying topic to another?"

"Why not?" Ted pulled his bag up from the floor and started rummaging around inside.

"I think I felt something for Cody earlier…" Randy frowned as he heard the words come out of his mouth. "Like pity or like…he reminded me of the Cody from before…"

"Whoa, wait a minute," Ted dropped the bag to the ground, his gaze confused. "You felt something for Cody?"

Randy looked around the room to make sure no one was close enough to them to hear and lowered his voice. "Ever since that night, I've hated Cody. The hatred I have for him stems from the fact that I feel hurt by him; betrayed by him. I've held him partly responsible for what happened and I swore our friendship was ruined forever but today…" He frowned. "We were walking down to the ring and he looked down at my phone and saw a picture of Al and he just started talking about her and for a minute there it was like we were back to just a few months ago. This kid has been a huge part of my life. Cody has been in my life longer than John has and today for the first time it hit me. We were great friends and I don't have him in my life any more."

"Well…I think your reasons for cutting him out were pretty decent, Ran. It's not like you did it on a whim." Ted raised an eyebrow at him.

"No, I get that and I don't regret kicking him to the curb after what happened. It was just…I don't know. it was a weird moment. When he was talking to me, it felt normal. he sounded like he hoped that picture would be what would fix us and when I snapped at him and told him it wasn't gonna happen, he looked," Randy stopped and took a deep breath. "He looked remorseful for the first time. He looked sad, like he realized at that moment that there was no fixing us. It was the first time I've seen him look like that, Ted. He never showed regret for what happened that night. I think that's part of the thing that's fueled my hatred but tonight he did and for the first time in months I looked at him and felt no hated. I felt pity and…"

Ted stared at Randy as he trailed off. When the older man made no move to finish speaking, he reached a hand over and patted Randy's. "Cody is very lost right now, Randy. I've known that for awhile and I think you realized it today for the first time. He's not the Cody we grew up with. He's not the Cody I loved and would've waited for,"

Ted's eyes lowered and he shook his head. "I feel pity for him, too. I've tried talking to him but he just makes a joke out of it when I try to help. It stinks, though, because I miss him. I gave up on the idea of us becoming anything more than friends a long time ago. I love Kris so much and wouldn't give her and my son up for anything but I have to admit that the part of me that loved Cody so deeply still does. It's something I struggle with every day but seeing Cody become the man he's becoming actually helps. He's not someone I want around right now so as much as I miss him, I had to let him go. He's gonna have to find his path on his own. Maybe today was the day he'll start trying to."

"I hope so," Randy rested his head on the wall of his locker. "I kinda miss him, too."

* * *

Much later that night Randy sat in his bus, already bathed and ready for bed as it traveled down the dark, quiet roads to the next arena. He watched the comedy playing before him on the large television but could barely focus. His eyes drifted shut, the exhaustion from the day catching up to him as his weary muscles demanded he let sleep take him.

Despite his hesitation about the match with Cody, it had gone over perfectly. As predicted, both men were able to work together flawlessly, a look between them being the only thing needed to change things up. It seemed that even after a few years apart in the ring, they still had the chemistry that made for a good match; a match that had ended in a handshake backstage, much to Cody's surprise.

Randy forced his eyes to remain open as he awaited John's phone call, the older man a few hours behind on his own show for the night. He tried focusing on the television show but found his mind wandering back to the look of surprise on Cody's face as they met backstage after the match. The last thing the younger man had expected was praise and a handshake from Randy.

The iPhone rang beside him on the large bed and Randy quickly snatched it up, thankful for a distraction from his thoughts.

"John,"

"Hey, babe. I'm sorry I took so long to call. I know you must be exhausted. Tonight was like the night that wouldn't end."

Randy smiled at the sound of John's tired voice. "Sounds like it. You should know by know there's no rest for the weary; especially when the weary is Super Cena."

John laughed softly in his ear before answering. "How was your night?"

Randy's smile dropped slowly and he bit his lip. "Not bad. Had a good match…with Cody."

John sighed. "I can't believe they're going forward with that shit. I'm sorry you're being put through it. How do you feel?"

"It's awkward. I mean, it would be weird if it weren't awkward but," Randy shrugged. "It's just something I have to do. I'm not gonna let it drive me crazy."

"Randy, I don't want you to have to do something you don't want to do. Tell Hunter the truth. Get out of this storyline, baby. I know it has to be killing you and Cody's probably busting a nut over it. He's dying to get his hands back on you, the little shitstain."

"John," Randy quickly interrupted John's rant. "He's actually being professional about it. I told you; the day he messed with you was just done to get under your skin. He's not doing that with me. We actually had a great match and the fans loved it…I can't complain."

"Are you sure?" asked John, the doubt evident in his voice.

Randy smiled. "I'm sure. I can do this, Johnny." He sighed and looked over at the clock on his television. "Do you want to hang up already or can you talk for a bit more?"

"I can talk to you forever, Ran. Especially when it sounds like something is worrying you,"

Randy remained silent, unsure if he should tell John what he was feeling towards Cody.

"OK, baby, now you're starting to freak me out here…" John's worried voice carried through the phone to Randy and he quickly answered. "I just had a talk with Ted today about something and wanted to get your view on it."

"Well, if Ted came up with an idea, I can already tell you I hate it." John laughed softly, causing Randy to roll his eyes.

"John, I'm serious." He took a deep breath and let it out quickly. "Today before the match with Cody, he and I had a weird moment. He started acting like it was old times and when I reminded him that it wasn't, he looked sad and remorseful. It was the first time I'd seen that look in his face since that night and I mentioned it to Ted. Ted said he felt like Cody was lost and I have to agree because the Cody I knew as a kid would never have taken advantage of a situation like he did with me and him that night. It made me feel bad because I remember all those years of friendship we had and now I just feel so confused."

Randy took another deep breath after his ramble. "It just made me wonder…what if Cody asks for my forgiveness one day? What if he shows true remorse? A part of me thinks I could forgive him, John."

John remained silent on the phone. Randy's heartbeat, which was already racing, only increased.

"John, you gotta say something."

"What am I supposed to say? You seem to have already made up your mind…with Ted's help, of course. I'm sure he jumped at the chance to convince you to get Legacy back together."

Randy frowned at the anger in John's voice. "Ted didn't convince to do a goddamned thing, John. This didn't even happen in front of him. He didn't tell me to do anything! I'm the one saying this because I'm the one thinking it!"

"I don't get why you're thinking it. How can you possibly think of forgiving one of your childhood friends after he did something so horrible to you, Randy? He betrayed your trust in the worst way possible!"

Randy sighed and kept his voice level as he tried to soothe John. "Cody needs help, Johnny,"

"I think you need help, Randy," responded John, the anger still present.

Randy's face quickly hardened, a switch having gone off in his brain. He stood up off the bed and began to pace the room. "Are you fucking kidding me? You think I need help? For what exactly?"

"You're insane for wanting to do this, Randy!" John's voice was a yell now and Randy had to pull the phone away from his ear.

"So, I'm insane for thinking about forgiving Cody but you're not insane for already forgiving Dwayne? Why is it when you do something I want to do it's completely normal and just you being the standup, good guy you always are? You just love for people to think that about you, don't you? John fucking Cena, the goody two shoes who will even forgive the guy who got him plastered and took him back home so they could fuck!" Randy clenched his jaw tightly. "On our fucking bed!"

"Randy…" warned John in a low tone.

"No! I'm still talking!" Randy gripped the phone tightly in his hand. "You did the exact same thing I'm thinking of doing but for some reason its rubbing you the wrong way. Why is that? What the hell is the difference between you forgiving Dwayne and me forgiving Cody?"

"Because Dwayne isn't around every fucking day, Randy! Cody is!" screamed John in his ear.

"So what? Who the hell cares if he's around every day, John?" Randy stood in front of the large window and braced himself against it as the bus moved forward as he yelled back into the phone "What the hell do you think is gonna happen if I forgive him and he's around? You think I'm gonna fuck him again?"

"Yes, I do!"

Randy's eyes widened as his mouth dropped open. The hand gripping the phone began to tremble and he stumbled forward, back towards the bed.

"What?" he choked out.

John sighed in his ear. "It's too easy, Ran. You forgive him, become friends again and one day something could happen…"

"And you think I would?" Randy's voice was barely a whisper, his free hand clutching the bed sheets tightly.

"I think it's playing with fire, Ran. It would be a mistake you could make without even realizing it…"

"You know what," interrupted Randy. "Fuck you, John."

Randy quickly ended the call and turned the phone off to prevent the older man from calling back. He slammed the phone down onto the nightstand and stared out the window, frozen as the empty fields flew by.

**A/N: REVIEW! Let me know what you think! **

**A/N 2: Hearing the awesome CM Punk had emergency knee surgery today! So sad! I hope he's not gone for long!**


	26. Chapter 26

**A/N: Wow, some very upset people at John! Take a deep breath, everyone and try to calm down, LOL.  
PS: ****This story isnt going to be a sappy love story with no plot twists and turns. It will have lots of ups and downs and if you dont like that, by all means, stop reading.**

Randy breathed a sigh of relief when his hotel room door appeared. He quickly pulled out the keycard the front desk had given him and slid it inside the door before he could run into any of his co-workers. The previous night's events had worn him down so much that he didn't have to energy for anything. All he wanted was to shower, throw some food down and to rest until the time came he had to go to the arena. He had made up his mind; his problems with John, however huge and exhausting, would not interfere with his career.

Randy let go of the handle of his bags and let them drop onto the floor. He walked further into the room, pulling off his dark sunglasses as he walked. His feet quickly came to a halt, though when his eyes landed on the figure sitting comfortably on his bed.

Randy shook his head and crossed his arms over his chest. "I don't know why I'm surprised. I should've known you'd be here,"

John shrugged. "Where else would I be? I can't exactly make up for my huge fuck up over the phone." His eyes moved up to meet Randy's but quickly lowered them back down. "Ran, I…"

"Don't. Don't say you're sorry. I'm so tired of that phrase," Randy dropped his sunglasses on the desk and gave his back to John. He calmly emptied his pockets, only once glancing at the older man in the reflection of the mirror before him. John looked like the picture of misery, the dejection written all over his face, the confident demeanor that filled him no longer evident. For once in his life Randy wasn't filled with the need to comfort him. On the contrary, he found himself feeling nothing as he stared at John.

"What are you doing here? I know you had stuff to do today,"

"I got out of it. I told Vince I didn't feel well and I knew Punk would do it…" John sighed. "I know we sound like a broken record already but we need to talk."

Randy turned over and raised an eyebrow. "Why? I think all we need to know was said last night."

"Ran, you can't throw it all away because of what I said last night. I was mad, OK. I was…I got scared at the thought of you and Cody getting close again. I know how he feels for you and I had to say something that I thought would stop you from letting him back into your life!" John's voice was tinged with panic as he pleaded with Randy. The younger man stared back at him emotionlessly and it only served to heighten his panic. "I love you, Randy and as much as you may not want to hear it, I am so sorry."

Randy leaned on the edge of the desk, his eyes moving away from John's. He looked around the room as he sighed deeply, trying to think carefully about how to form his words. "You know, I thought last night was a dream. I can't even remember falling asleep but I guess I did at one point after we talked and when I woke up, our fight was the first thing I remembered; word for word. But, I convinced myself it was a dream because it didn't seem possible what you said to me. Then, I go outside, into the kitchen and there's Ray looking at me with so much pity in his eyes because he heard me screaming at you all the way in the front of the bus. That was when I knew it really happened. I thought I would be angry and upset and I thought my day would be ruined but I didn't feel any of that. I felt nothing, John. What does that mean?"

John shrugged and met Randy's gaze nervously. "I don't…God; I don't know how to say it but to just say it..." He looked down at his hands, tapping anxiously on his leg. "Do you not love me anymore?"

Randy rolled his eyes and sank into the chair in front of the desk. "I can't stop loving you overnight, John. Can you?"

John quickly shook his head, his eyes lifting back up. "No! Of course not! I don't think I could ever stop loving you. I love you so much, Ran."

"Then why is this happening between us? People who love each other don't act like we're acting, John. We're horrible to each other! The things we're saying to each other…" Randy trailed off, one hand coming up to rub his forehead. "My head hurts every time I think about it."

"Randy," John quickly moved off the bed and walked over to where Randy sat. He bent to his knees before the younger man and grasped his hand tightly before he could pull it away. "I want to work things out. We **have** to work things out, Randy. I don't want anyone but you ever and I refuse to let you go to anyone else."

Randy stared down at his hand in John's grip and sighed. "How can you say you want me but you think I'm gonna cheat on you? I wouldn't want someone I think is gonna cheat on me, John."

John quickly shook his head. "I didn't mean it! I told you! I said it just to keep you away from Cody. I know you would never cheat on me! You've never even looked at anyone else in the years we've been together and the only reason Cody was able to get you in a room was because you weren't yourself!"

"You should've never said that, John. That wasn't the way to keep me away from Cody," Randy bit his lip nervously. "And I don't believe you said it only for that reason. It came out of your mouth too easily, too smoothly. It's something you believe, John, whether you want to admit it or not."

John shook his head, his hand gripping Randy's tighter. "I don't believe it, Randy! I know you would never do anything with him again! I know you never wanted to do anything with him in the first place! It wasn't you with him that night. It wasn't my Randy."

Randy stared down at their linked hands, John's ring shining back up at him. "So, if I were to tell you I called Cody this morning and I'm meeting him for lunch, you would be OK with that?"

John sighed. "I'm not gonna lie to you, Ran. No, I wouldn't be OK with that."

"Well, at least you're being honest," mumbled Randy, pulling his hand back. "Why wouldn't you be OK with that? Why am I supposed to be OK with you forgiving Dwayne and moving on but you can't be OK with me doing the same with Cody?" He raised an eyebrow. "And don't give me the same answer from last night. If you don't think anything is gonna happen with me and Cody, then what the fuck is the real reason?"

John shrugged but remained kneeling before Randy. The younger man sighed and went to stand. "I can't deal with this shit…"

"No, Ran, don't!" John reached for Randy's hand once more and tugged him back down. "I hate Cody, OK! I hate him! He hurt you and he's gonna do it again and I can't stand the thought of it! He's getting too chummy with Brock, too and I don't like it. What if he does something worse to you next time? I don't want you to lose yourself again like when you were all friends. There was no room for me in your life when Brock came back and you started spending every night with them. You pulled away from me and I'm afraid you're gonna do it again."

Randy frowned and shook his head. "I never pulled away from you. I would never…"

"You did, Ran. You may not have realized it but you did." John let go of Randy's hand and lowered into a sitting position. "I know how the other boys see me. I'm John; the goody two shoes who doesn't party and drink and stay out. I'm too responsible and too much of a stick in the mud. They get annoyed by me and laugh at me." He shrugged and smiled slowly. "I never cared, you know. It never bothered me. They thought that made me cold and standoffish; that I thought I was better than all of them because I didn't do that but I never thought that. I never gave it much thought at all. It's just who I am, my personality. I didn't mind them talking about me or when I say them in a corner laughing after a joke at my expense. I minded when I saw you join them; when I saw you getting pulled in by them and doing what they were doing. I minded because I knew the more they pulled you in, the further you would distance yourself from me."

Randy stared at John, shocked into stunned silence by his words. He started to protest but found himself unsure of how to go about it.

"Ran, I'm still not excusing myself for what I said. I should never have told you I doubted you with Cody because I didn't mean it. I don't think you would ever be unfaithful. It was so stupid of me to say anything. This whole thing is so fucking stupid…" John stood up, his own head shaking in annoyance now. "I'm pretty much trying to choose your friendships for you. I have no right to tell you to not forgive Cody. I'm also the most pathetic person walking the face of this Earth right now for the stunt I pulled with you last night but I was so fucking desperate at that moment."

"Why didn't you tell me you felt that way? How long have you even felt that way?" Randy's voice was barely a whisper and he couldn't bring himself to meet John's eyes.

"I guess a few months ago before the night…you know," John shrugged. "It just kicked in when Brock came back and his attitude trickled down to the rest of you guys. The reason I noticed was because it had been so long since I see you so dismissive of me. The last time you gave me that attitude was when you were using."

"I swear, if I did, I didn't notice. I would never want to leave you behind and go back to the life I had when I was using, John." Randy sighed and stood up. "God, we are so fucked up, John. We have so many things to work out and I don't know if we can. Somewhere down the line we forgot how to talk to each other and now it's all a mess. We can't solve anything if we can't sit and talk like two normal people instead of lashing out at each other. I think all we're doing after each fight is breezing over the issue at the root of the problem. Fighting and then apologizing and falling into bed together isn't working anything out when we're ignoring the fact that we have a serious, deeper problem."

"We can keep going to Dr. Adams…" began John but Randy quickly shook his head. "I hate therapy. I hate Dr. Adams. We seem to argue more after seeing him! Besides, we don't even go see him often enough. We're always on the road and we have to start spending more time in St. Louis now that Al is back in school…"

"Well, then what are we gonna do, Ran because we're gonna do something! I refuse to give up on us. I'm an asshole, I get it. Ted had a point to everything he says about me but I'm a selfish asshole and I can't give you up. We will work things out!" John walked over to where Randy stood and braced his arms on either side of the desk behind him, trapping Randy in his arms. "You say you still love me, despite everything I put you through. Well, I still love you, too and I will fight for you even if I'm fighting alone. So, you tell me; what are we gonna do?"

Randy leaned back and turned his face, trying to put some distance between him and John. He could feel John's breath tickling the side of his face. "We need to go home and figure things out. Maybe just us talking about everything one on one will help somehow…" He turned his head around, locking eyes with John. "But we talk about everything. We throw it all on the table. We're not leaving St. Louis without working shit out because we can't take one more, John. **I **can't take one more fight. I've told you before; I'm getting pretty damn tired of fighting."

"Trust me, babe, so am I." responded John. "I'm sick of taking one step forward then two back. We end it now."

Randy nodded and tried to move to the side but John's arms kept him trapped. "Can you let me go now?"

John's eyes remained locked onto Randy's. He leaned forward slightly, pressing his body as close to Randy's as he could. Randy's eyes widened slightly as John moved his hands from the desk and wrapped them around his hips. John moved his head closer, letting his lips hover over Randy's, their breaths mingling. Just as he made the final move to join their lips, Randy turned away, giving John his cheek instead. "Don't,"

John frowned and pulled away from Randy, shaking his head slightly. "I'm sorry. It's just…"

"I know but that kiss will lead to other things, though and it's not the best decision we could make right now so," Randy shrugged, a small smile on his face.

John returned the smile and slowly took a step back towards the younger man. "I love you so much, Ran. I'm so sorry that I ever said something to make you think I doubt you and don't love you. It was my fear talking, I swear. You say you're afraid of me leaving you one day for someone I consider perfect? Well, my greatest fear is you leaving me for someone who's not uptight and rigid and a stick in the mud…"

"I fell in love with you, John," interrupted Randy. "In spite of those things," He smirked playfully as John rolled his eyes. "John, I'm gonna tell you what you tell me all the time and I want you to get it through your head. I love you and I don't want anyone but you. It's just you and me, Cena and we're gonna work this out together…or kill each other trying."

John's smile widened and he nodded. "Sounds good,"

**A/N: It's obvious these men have a lot to work out but what I'm going for with this story is that the power of their love will get them through. It's not gonna happen overnight, however, like it wouldn't in real life. Give it time, enjoy it and REVIEW! But, I'll say it again, if you're looking for a story with a simple lovey dovey storyline and some smutty scenes in between, this isnt it. If you cant rock with that, go elsewhere. Peace. **


	27. Chapter 27

**A/N: Happy 2013! I'm a horrible person for keeping you all waiting so long, I know. I won't bother to make excuses but the holidays did keep me super busy…guess that's an excuse LOL. Anyway, I'm back and hope you are all still interested in this story and my other baby, LOVE, which I will also update soon. **

Randy closed the door and secured the alarm after Sam and Alanna's exit. He let out a deep breath, the sound a mixture of relief and of finally being able to go back to being himself. He slowly walked back in to the kitchen, his eyes landing on John bent over the dishwasher. A slow smile spread over his face and the feeling of relaxation in his body only wavered. It was a huge accomplishment, he thought and it made him happy that John and he were finally starting to get used to the new familiar between themselves.

"Did you rinse those dishes first?"

John remained bent over the machine but glanced over at Randy quickly. "Yes. You've screamed it at me enough times that I know to rinse them by now. I'm just trying to figure out where the soap goes but these letters on all these little boxes are all so small and I can barely see…"

"Going blind in your old age there, Cena?" Randy smirked and walked over to John, pushing him gently out of the way and inserting the soap into the machine smoothly. He closed the lid and started the wash cycle before turning over. "Done,"

John rolled his eyes and bowed down before flipping Randy off, causing the younger man to laugh. "Whatever. You can master kitchen appliances and I'll just master everything else in the world."

Randy shook his head before reaching up to cup his face. "Don't make me laugh. My face literally hurts. I didn't know that was possible."

"It's all the smiling we've been doing lately. Our faces, yours especially, aren't used to that expression," replied John as he wrapped the leftovers spread on the counter.

"I guess," Randy sighed and walked over to the other side of the counter, grabbing some foil so he could help John wrap. "Who knew it would be this exhausting?"

"To pretend to still be in love and happily married?" asked John with a small smile.

"I'm not pretending when it comes to the love," responded Randy quickly, his hands stalling over a plate. He shook his head and looked down. "I mean, things are weird but the love thing isn't fake with me, John."

"Good," John reached for the plate Randy covered and smiled. "It's not with me either,"

Randy nodded and lowered his body to a chair, watching as John arranged the leftovers in the large refrigerator. He slumped back in the seat and let his eyes close as he heard John's footsteps move around the kitchen. The footsteps soon stopped in front of him and he let his eyes slowly open. John looked down at him, a concerned frown on his face.

"Why don't you go to bed? I'll finish here. You cooked so…"

"I'm not tired." Randy frowned. "Not physically, at least." He smiled and pushed out the chair across from him with his foot. "Sit down with me,"

John nodded and sank into the chair. He leaned forward and rested his elbows on the table. "Well, I'm tired; both physically and mentally. Maybe we shouldn't have come back to St. Louis."

"We had to. After that whole lecture from Mom last time we promised her we would spend more time here. If we went back on that she would've flipped and then she would've really known something was wrong and I don't want that." Randy's frown deepened. "Look, I know what we're doing is probably wrong. We should be honest with our families and tell them we're having problems and that we're together but not really together. I just don't know how to do it, John and I think pretending while we're in front of them is just easier on all of us. Maybe it's me being selfish…if you don't want to do this anymore, though, it's ok. We can sit them all down and tell them the truth…"

"No, I don't want that, either!" interrupted John, his hand shooting across the table and grabbing Randy's. "You're right; what we're doing is probably wrong and crazy and God knows it's exhausting because we're watching every word we say and how we act in front of so many people but when I think about having to tell everyone what's really going on with us, I kinda think what we're doing is better." He squeezed Randy's hand tightly and shrugged. "We're gonna work things out so what's the point of telling people we're not together now if you and I both know we're gonna be together soon and then forever?"

Randy cocked his head to the side. "How can you say that with such confidence, John?"

"Because I know," responded John firmly. "It may sound like I'm living in a fantasy world, Randy but I'm not. We're doing things right this time and it's all gonna work out in the end."

John watched as Randy lowered his eyes but felt no fear at the move from the younger man. He knew Randy was still nervous about their marriage despite the steps they had taken to make things better. He himself was still nervous, as well and he knew they were far from calling their marriage back to normal but John knew they were closer than ever before.

For the past 2 months the couple had remained in their St. Louis home. To the outside world the couple had returned to St. Louis to be closer to Alanna now that she had started pre-school and couldn't travel. John and Randy had made the decision to continue working on their marriage on their own and still keep their family out of the loop about their troubles. They had also said their goodbyes to Dr. Adams and told the man of their intentions to continue working on their problems but on their own. The doctor had wished them luck in their unorthodox choice but still sent them some material and references for doctors in St. Louis.

Despite the difficulty of having to pretend all the time, it seemed that Randy and John were pulling it off. Randy had been terrified his mother would be able to see right through their act but she hadn't. It had been a great relief and it provided them with the best of both worlds…at home they could live in separate bedrooms and talk for hours about the mistakes they'd made and what they should've done even if it led to a blow out fight but in front of their families they could still indulge in the affection of a couple very much in love and share in the hugs and kisses they were both missing.

"Ran,"

Randy blinked and focused on John's face, staring at him intently. "I'm sorry. I just got lost for a minute there."

"Well, come back to me," John laughed softly.

Randy smiled and nodded. "We're doing better this time, aren't we? I mean, we're still fighting sometimes but at least things are getting said and understood now."

"Yeah, they are. I think I'm finally getting into that hard head of yours…" John held up a hand when he saw Randy roll his eyes and open his mouth for a rebuttal. "And vice versa."

"Exactly," Randy bit his lip and looked down at the table once more. "You know all that stuff Dr. Adams sent us? I actually read some of it last night."

"What's it about?" asked John softly, moving his chair closer to Randy's.

"It's a lot of stuff I guess he was hoping to cover with us but what caught my eye first was this timeline he sent. I'm pretty sure he sent it because we told him we were working on our own timeline but his blows ours out of the water." Randy shook his head. "Apparently, getting back to normal takes 2 years. We're in between the issues clarification and addressing the problem phase in the infidelity timeline now. Of course, the timeline is meant for a couple where only one person cheated and I'm pretty sure the case study for it was a straight couple but…"

"Ran, you're losing me. Is there a point to this timeline?" John frowned in confusion.

"Supposedly the trauma phase lasts 6 months after the affair is discovered. We've past that. Now this phase we're in is where we have to examine what led to the affair and work on those issues to prevent it from happening again," Randy smiled and shrugged. "I guess that's what we're doing, right? So, in a way, we're doing things exactly like a marriage counselor would suggest. Maybe our weird way of working on things isn't so weird after all."

John shook his head, a smile now gracing his face. "It's not. I think every couple has to figure out what works for themselves and make their own version of a timeline…"

"Can we stop calling it that? How about just calling it our set goal or something else?" interrupted Randy with a grimace.

"OK, then, our own version of a set goal. We have decided our goal is to honor the vows we took and remain together and we're gonna do just that. There's no time set for that goal, either," John tugged Randy forward and placed a quick chaste kiss on his lips, much to the surprise of the younger man. "I know we're not supposed to do that since there's no one here to put an act on for but I just couldn't resist."

Randy raised an eyebrow but smiled. "I'll let you have one but just that one." He stood up and stretched his arms over his head, noting how John's eyes lowered to the skin exposed as his shirt rose. Randy quickly dropped his arms, not wanting to torture the older man any longer. "I'm gonna hit the sack. The bus will be here early tomorrow so you'd better finish up in here and get some sleep, too, Cena. The dishwasher is done, by the way."

John groaned as he surveyed the mess he still had to clean up from their earlier family dinner. "Aren't you gonna help me?"

"Nope. I cooked, remember?" Randy smirked and started to walk away but stopped in front of John's chair. He placed a kiss on the older man's forehead and smiled. "Good night, Johnny. I love you,"

"I love you, too, Ran," responded John softly. "Remember that tomorrow when you come down here and say I destroyed your kitchen."

Randy smiled and walked out of the room, ignoring John's final attempt to get him to help. He continued on to his room, the feeling of relaxation in his body stronger than ever.

* * *

"Ted, can I talk to you?"

Ted looked up, his eyes widened and full of shock and confusion. "Uh…what?"

John sighed and shook his head. "I can't believe I'm saying this but, can I talk to you? I want to talk to you."

Ted's look quickly changed to one of suspicion. "Why? We don't talk, Cena."

"Because I think it's time we start. I need to clear up a lot of stuff with you about Randy and I think it's time we did it. The reason we have so many problems is because we've never actually sat down and talked about anything." John shrugged. "I want to change that."

Ted frowned, a small smirk taking over his face. "What are you on, Cena? Is this some kind of joke to you, a rib or something? What's your game?"

"I have no fucking game, Ted!" John responded loudly. "I'm being serious! Can you give it a try?"

"Why should I? I've been trying to get us to see eye to eye for years now and it's been you who hasn't wanted to! You insisted on playing the asshole with me from day one despite knowing how tight Randy and I were; that I saw him as an older brother! I tried for years to get through to you and to find something else we had in common besides Randy because despite him being the most important thing we have in common, it didn't matter to you!" responded Ted back just as loudly.

John inhaled sharply as he processed Ted's words and the all too familiar feeling he'd been having lately flooded over him. "You're right. Randy is the most important thing we have in common and I'm an asshole who never realized how much I was hurting him by acting the way I do towards you. I'm sorry and I'm going to make an honest effort to change things now. I know we can't become friends in one day but I want us to at least start by being cordial to each other. So..." He lowered his eyes to look at Ted's gym bag on the locker room floor. "Can we talk? Maybe grab a burger to eat at catering later?"

Ted's frown had softened somewhere along the line of John's speech. He slowly shrugged and nodded before lowering down to the bench in front of his chosen locker and reaching for his bag. "Yeah, that sounds OK."

John nodded and slung his gym bag down from his shoulder onto the bench next to Ted. "Is it OK if we're locker neighbors for tonight? Randy should be here soon, too. He had a meet and greet at some store."

"It's fine, John. If you're serious about us becoming friends then we should be able to be without him for awhile without killing each other." Ted smiled and moved back on the bench, making room for the older man to empty his own bag out.

John nodded, a small smile on his face, as well. He was happy he had taken the first step in building a friendship with Ted but he couldn't deny that there was still some awkwardness between. It would take some time for both men to let go of the dislike for each other and forget the many hurtful things they'd said to each other over the years. If anything, John had a longer way to go. He had to admit, he'd been the instigator of most of the arguments between Ted and he. After the younger man had come back from his latest injury with a newfound faith, John had taken great delight in furthering his abuse knowing Ted wouldn't respond the way he'd had years before. It was that knowledge and the memory of Randy's face every time he started an argument with Ted that had his stomach turning at that moment.

"Ted,"

The younger man looked up at John's soft call. "Yeah,"

John sighed and sat on the bench. "I'm sorry. My mind has been like a fucking slide show of my life for the past couple of months and a big chunk of it is images of me being a massive douchebag to you."

"John, the douchebag thing goes both ways…" started Ted but he was quickly interrupted.

"No, no, I was way worse." John lowered his voice after shooting a quick glance around the locker room to ensure no one was close enough to hear them. "You're the only one who knows the troubles Randy and I have had and what we're still going through as we try to save our relationship. I appreciate the kind of friend you've been to him and that you've kept our secret. You're really loyal, Ted and now that I don't have my hate blinders on, I can see it and I'm actually sorry I don't have a friend like you." He shrugged and kept his eyes focused down on the bench. "Randy's the only real friend I've had since walking into this place and that friendship feeling turned into something more; something amazing. I'm so thankful it did but I have to admit, it was weird to see that once Randy and I become boyfriends and then husbands, I didn't have any friends. It made me cling to Randy to the point where I hated anyone who was his friend, not just you. I was upset that he still had actual friends and I just had him. I hated him giving you guy's attention because I wanted it all on me. The reason was, though, because I didn't have friends of my own to give attention to."

John looked up, fully expecting to see a look of pity in Ted's eyes as he laid all his cards on the table. Instead he was met with a calm look on Ted's face; a look full of understanding. The guilt already inside him doubled and he shook his head.

"With every minute Randy spent with his friends, all of them, I felt him pulling away from me. He was getting things from his friendships that he wasn't getting from me and it drove me crazy. I didn't realize then that what people get from friendships and from a relationship are totally different things and they're OK and healthy and don't pose a threat to anything…" John took a deep breath. "I fucked up a couple months ago. I don't know if Randy told you but he told me he wanted to make amends with Cody and I flipped out and told him that I thought him making amends would lead to him cheating on me again."

"Yes, I do know that. He told me and I told him how he had found it in his heart to forgive you for saying that was beyond merciful. I would've signed divorce papers right then and there," Ted shrugged. "Sorry,"

"No, it's fine. You're right. He should've kicked me to the curb but he didn't." John smiled, his eyes drifting down to his wedding band. "Randy is so smart and he has the biggest heart of anyone I know. Some people would hear that and think I was insane for saying it but it's true."

"Yes, it is," agreed Ted.

John nodded. "He knew, after the initial reaction of anger died down, that I didn't mean what I said. He knew it went deeper and he let me talk about it in my own time. He knows the insecurities I have but he didn't know how far they went. I don't think I even realized how screwed up I am. We both have a lot of issues to work out and we're really doing it this time but it's thanks to Randy for giving us one final shot." He looked up and met Ted's intent stare. "You told me once that I didn't deserve Randy and it pissed me off because I knew you had told him, too. I thought he would agree with you and just leave but he didn't, even when I told him I agreed with you. He told me he never thought that but I can't shake it from my thoughts. I find myself now trying to prove it to myself. I want to be deserving of someone like Randy in my life. He has this great image of me in his head. It's so great that he confessed to feeling like I would be the one to leave him one day. He thinks I'm gonna find some guy, maybe Dwayne, who's perfect and I'm gonna run off with him. He doesn't realize he's my definition of perfect and that I would never leave him."

"You and Randy have a lot of things to still work out, John," Ted smiled. "But I think you're gonna be able to work them out. You're finally opening up to each other and being one hundred percent honest. Insecurities are a part of human nature and everyone has them but when they get to the point where they're interfering with your daily life and relationships, you have to take a step back and realize where they're coming from. You and Randy had greatly different upbringings but there's something inside both of you that make you have these doubts about how good of men you are and what you deserve out of life. You have to address it because it will ruin you if you don't. I'm happy to see you are…finally."

John laughed and shook his head. "I didn't even know how fucked up I was until a couple months ago. It's pathetic."

"No, it's not. Pathetic is giving up on the person you love because you don't want to deal with the real issue," Ted sighed and looked over to the door as it banged open and shut. Cody strolled into the room, his bag trailing behind him. The younger man headed for Sandow and his new group of friends on the opposite side of the locker room, barely sparing Ted a glance.

"Pathetic was what I was doing. Confessing my love for someone, letting them walk all over me and treat me like shit and just hoping one day they would realize what they were doing…allowing myself to think it was ok to be treated that way," Ted shook his head. "That was pathetic. I was fighting for someone who wasn't fighting back for me. You and Randy are fighting for each other; for your relationship. That is brave. You and Randy are brave. I believe in you two."

John stared at Ted as if seeing him for the first time. He let out a deep breath and smiled. "Wow, thank you." He laughed loudly and looked away. "Fuck my life; you're really not an asshole. Now I feel worse than I did before."

Ted laughed and nodded. "Good. Feel guilty, motherfucker."

John's laughter joined with Ted, the men so lost in their own personal bubble that they didn't notice Randy slowly approach.

"Uh, what's going on here? What did I just walk in on?"

John looked up at Randy's stunned face, the younger man's eyebrow raised. "Hey, Ran. Ted and I were just talking."

Randy frowned and looked back and forth between both men. "You and Ted don't do that…"

"Things have changed," John shrugged. "I've turned over a new leaf."

"We both have, actually," added Ted. "It's time for a new beginning."

Randy remained silent, his frown deepening. After a few seconds he shook his head. "I think I have to sit down."

John stood and allowed Randy to take over his seat as he placed his gym bag in the locker besides his own. "I know this is probably weird for you, Ran but isn't this what you've always wanted? Me and Ted to get along?"

Randy nodded slowly. "Of course but I just never thought it would happen."

"Randy," John bent in front of Randy and grasped his hand. "I wasn't kidding when I said I wanted to work on everything having to do with our relationship. Ted is your best friend and he's a damn good one. He's important to you and I've never respected that. I'm very sorry for that, baby. I want to make things right in all aspects of our life. Ted is a part of our life. I had to make things right with him." He looked over at Ted and smiled. "We may not be all the way there just yet but I think we'll get there one day. Maybe one day he'll think I'm good enough for you."

"Maybe," mumbled Ted with a smile.

Randy stared down at John, a small smile on his face. He stroked his finger over John's hand and nodded. "Thank you, baby. This means a lot."

John placed a quick kiss on Randy's matching wedding band and stood. "So, now I'm hungry. What do you say we go get that burger at catering now?"

"Sure. I could eat," Ted stood up, tossing his empty gym bag on the floor of his locker. Randy watched him move towards John with an amused grin. "So, now you two are best buds and you're just gonna ditch me? Don't I get an invite to grab a burger?"

Ted laughed and shook his head as John walked back over to where Randy still sat.

"I would never ditch you, gorgeous. Come on," John stretched his hand out and pulled Randy up. The men locked eyes and wordlessly leaned in for a soft kiss, both pulling away before it could be deepened. Randy rested his forehead against John's and sighed contently, enjoying the feeling of peace that for once wasn't so elusive in his life.

**A/N: And so the boys move forward! Hope you all like! I know this chapter was a lot of talking but it's talking that has to be done! REVIEW!**

**A/N 2: For my readers of LOVE, I will be updating tomorrow or Friday for sure. Keep an eye out! **


	28. Chapter 28

**A/N: Update time to start the week on a great note! Hope you enjoy! **

John slumped in the chair, his eyes focused downward on the screen of his phone and his ears barely catching a word of Randy and Ted's animated conversation beside him. The WWE makeshift cafeteria was full of noise and activity as superstars wandered in and out for food, drinks and conversation. John pushed it all aside and focused on the words he was reading. He tried to ignore the tingling sensation creeping up his spine but it persisted. His foot began an anxious tap on the floor and he set the phone down in annoyance.

Randy looked over at John once he heard the clatter of his beloved blackberry fall on the table they sat behind. He took another sip of his soda and raised an eyebrow when he noticed the older man's eyes stayed down and looked far away.

"John? All OK?"

John looked up, startled by Randy's voice breaking into his inner thoughts. He smiled and nodded, the lie on his lips about to fall out so easily but he suddenly found himself freezing. Randy stared at him, concern in his eyes now. John pressed his lips together and shook his head, remembering his and Randy's promise to be honest with each other. "I don't know. I'm wondering about something."

Randy nodded, a small frown on his face. "I can tell something is making that head of yours spin. Wanna share?"

"It's about Dwayne," answered John with a nod. He pulled his chair in closer to Randy's and looked around. Ted noticed the look between the men and moved his chair back. "I'll let you two talk in private…"

John quickly shook his head and held up a hand. "No, Ted, you don't have to leave! There's no secret of ours you don't already know anyway!" He laughed and pointed at the chair.

Ted smiled but shook his head. "No, really, I have to go anyway. I have to get ready for my match." His voice turned stern and he wagged a finger at the men. "If you feel an argument starting, though, stop and walk away. I don't want any more problems with you two kids, understood?"

John rolled his eyes nodded. "Yes, Dad."

Randy watched the pair interact, smiling slowly. He was pleased with the progress John and Ted had made during the past couple of weeks since they'd declared their truce. The men were being honest with each other and making a sincere effort to work on developing a true friendship, even acknowledging that there would still be arguments and disagreements in their future due to the two natures of the men alone.

"So," He turned back over to John after watching Ted depart. "Wanna tell me what's going on?"

John sighed and pushed his phone towards Randy. "I got an email from Dwayne. He goes on and on for a while about all the stuff Vince told me but then he kinda starts kissing my ass a little…I don't know. Maybe I'm reading it wrong?" He bit his lip and smiled slowly. "I don't know if this weird feeling is real or if it's me reacting to what you think of Dwayne."

"How do you mean?" asked Randy with a frown.

John shrugged. "I would've never thought twice about this email but after listening to you talk so much about Dwayne…" He looked down at the phone in Randy's hand now. "I think I've become a little more paranoid when it comes to Dwayne. I really thought about everything you said about him and I really listened, Ran. You made good points and I shouldn't have brushed them off before. The bad thing is that now all those good points you made have me really freaked out about working with this man again."

John pulled the phone from Randy's hand and opened it to Dwayne's email. "I mean, read it! He's going on and on about how much he's looking forward to working with me and how valuable I am to WWE and all this other shit but when I was here working the same arena with him years ago, he barely acknowledged me. It just seems like he's trying too hard to be my friend now…right?"

Randy smiled and shook his head. "I can't answer that for you, Johnny. You have to make your own decision about Dwayne. Isn't that what we agree on? I won't tell you what to do and I'll accept what you choose because I trust your heart. You already know my opinion on the matter, anyway."

John sighed. "I don't want to make this decision because I don't trust myself right now. Do I really doubt him or do I doubt him just because I know you doubt him?" He groaned and sat back on the chair. "Can I go home?"

Randy's smile widened and he tugged John back towards him. "No, you can't. You're gonna face this and you're gonna make the decision you know is right. Trust yourself, John. You guys are gonna meet again next week on Raw, right? Well, grab a burger together and feel him out. You've always been great at getting a vibe off someone and knowing who's real and who isn't. Use that on Dwayne."

John sighed once more, resting his forehead against Randy's. "I know you don't want me to be alone with him too much. I know you don't like us spending too much time together…"

"Stop." Randy pulled back and looked at John intently. "I trust you, John. I know the only reason you're gonna spend time with him is for work." He shrugged and smiled slowly. "Besides, we have to work through this issue, right? I have to find a way to be ok with you and Dwayne spending time together just like you're learning to be ok with me and Cody working together."

John nodded, his eyes moving to Randy's right. "And speak of the little shitstained devil…"

Randy turned over to see Cody approaching them, his face twisted in a scowl. "Alright, Orton. Stop with the lovey dovey shit and get up. We have work to do and time isn't going to stop for you and Cena."

Randy felt John's grip on their still joined hands tighten and he knew the older man was fighting with all his might to hold back a nasty retort. He frowned and Cody and replied sternly, "You will wait until I'm done, Cody and you do so because you have no choice in the matter. Now, go be a good little wrestler and wait for me at gorilla."

Cody's mouth dropped open and he narrowed his eyes angrily at Randy. "Who the hell do you think you're talking to, Orton? This isn't 5 years ago! I'm not your little lapdog anymore!"

"Jesus Christ, will you just get the fuck away from us already!" exploded John. He pulled one hand free from Randy's grasp and pointed it towards the hallway. "Just go!"

Randy quickly stood when he noticed Cody's face turn to John. "Enough! This won't help anything. Just go, Cody and I promise I'll be right there."

"Fine," Cody glared at John but nodded, slowly turning to walk away. John watched him go and sighed, shaking his head slightly. "God, I just can't help myself around that kid. No matter how hard I try to just not give in or react to him, I just can't help myself."

"He's good at pissing people off," replied Randy as he sank back down into his chair. "It's gonna take some time to build your immunity against him, Johnny. You're doing much better, believe it or not."

John smiled and reached for Randy's hand. "I still hate that you're in a feud with him. I hate him having his hands all over you. I think you're amazing for being able to put up with it because I know you hate it, too."

Randy nodded. "I do but this is business. Cody knows that's all it is and if he's letting himself get a thrill out of it then that's his problem. He knows I don't feel anything for him…especially when he's so fucking bipolar. It's like one minute I look at him and he looks remorseful of what he's done but then other times he acts like he just did. It's ridiculous and I don't have time to deal with it until I believe he's really serious." He sighed and stood up. "I'd better go before he comes back over here and throws another bitch fit."

"OK," John let go of Randy's hand and smiled. "Go be amazing tonight,"

Randy rolled his eyes. "As opposed to any other night?"

John smiled and nodded. "Very true," He stood up and hugged Randy close to him, pressing a quick kiss on the side of his neck before Randy could protest and pull away. "I'll see you later."

Randy moved away and headed down the hallway, disappearing from John's view. He sighed and debated whether to go back in the locker room and watch Randy's match or to stay in the catering hall and distract his mind by talking to the other wrestlers scattered around. As he contemplated what to do, his cell phone rang loudly and moved around the table surface. John frowned and reached for it quickly, wondering who would call him on a Monday night during Raw.

"Hello?"

"Hey, John. It's Dwayne,"

John's eyes widened. "Uh, hey. What's up?"

"I just wanted to check and see if you got my email from earlier. You usually write back right away," Dwayne laughed in his ear. "I figured I'd get your voicemail since its Monday and all."

"Yeah, well you would've gotten it in about an hour. My match isn't till the end…" started John.

"Of course Super Cena is closing the show." Interrupted Dwayne with another chuckle. John frowned, unable to place the tone in the older man's voice. "Yeah, so…anyway, I was just talking to Randy. I got your email, by the way."

"Was the hubby distracting you? I figured it had to be something with him stopping you from emailing me back."

John's frown deepened and he shook his head. "Well, it didn't seem urgent enough to need a response right away. I mean, I already knew everything you said I it. Vince sends me the same schedule, you know."

"Yeah, but…"

"Either way, though," interrupted John, his voice stern. "Talking to Randy is more important than returning emails; anyone's emails. You remember what it's like to be married, right? I'm sure you put your wife before emails."

Dwayne laughed. "Sometimes. She was kinda the one pushing me to answer them right away most of the time. Remember, she was my manager too so it was kind of a weird marriage. The divorce was the greatest thing that happened. We're better off as friends. Some people just are, you know?"

"I guess but Randy and I don't have that kind of marriage so…" John glanced at the clock and figured he'd try to hurry the conversation to an end. It was bordering on a weird topic right now and he wanted out. Talking about relationships was not what he wanted to do with Dwayne.

"Right, you and Randy have a totally different marriage."

John raised an eyebrow at the tone in Dwayne's voice. The creeping sensation in his back had returned and he didn't like it. "Look, D, I gotta go get ready. I'll see you next week, OK."

"Sure, sure, I understand. You gotta get back to the ring and the hubby and all the people who demand your attention. At least I'll have you all to myself next week. See you then, Johnny,"

Dwayne ended the call and John quickly pulled the phone away from his ear. He grimaced and dropped it on the tabletop with a loud clatter.

"Hey, what did that poor phone do to deserve that kind of treatment?"

John looked up to see Ted standing beside him still in his ring gear, a bottle of water in his hand. The younger man looked at him with a mixture of confusion and amusement.

"Just a bad phone conversation,"

"Not with Randy, right?" asked Ted quickly. John shook his head, a small smile on his face. "Isn't Randy in the ring right now?"

Ted shrugged and sat down. "Sorry. It just seems whenever you have that look of annoyance it's usually because of an argument with Randy. I didn't mean to annoy you further. I know things between you and Randy have gotten much better but sometimes I still wonder…"

"You didn't annoy me and I know," answered John. He smiled slowly, aware that despite all the progress he and Ted had made with their friendship, some things would never change. "The phone conversation annoyed me. It didn't help I was already annoyed by the email on it."

"It's not the poor phone's fault." Ted laughed and chugged down the remainder of his water. "I'm done for the night if you wanna talk. I know by the time Randy is done you'll probably be on your way out to the ring."

John looked down at his legs and shook his head. "Aren't you sick of dealing with me and Randy yet? I swear one day you're gonna run screaming away from us into a mental institution." He looked back up and smiled. "Why don't you give me some of your drama instead?"

Ted laughed and shrugged. "I wish I could but I don't have any!"

John rolled his eyes and turned away. "Fuck off then,"

Ted held up his hand. "Hey, trust me; I had plenty of drama there a few years ago when I was chasing after Cody. Luckily, Randy was there for me, every day and every night while I blubbered like an idiot over that little snot nose who treated me like shit. It's why I don't mind being there for him now. I found my peace in life and I want to help you and Randy find yours." He reached forward and patted John's knee. "Now, come on and start talking before I get up and find someone more interesting to talk to."

John sighed and looked over at the phone. "Dwayne called and he just freaked me out. Everything he says freaks me out now. The problem is I don't know if it's real or if it's just me reacting to how I know Randy feels about the situation." He shrugged and let his eyes close. "Randy wants me to go to lunch with him or just spend the day with him. He says I'm a good judge of character and I should be able to tell if he's really just being a friend or if he's interested in more. I don't feel like a good judge of character right now, though. My head is spinning with all these doubts…I'm going over all these points Randy made months ago that I brushed off so easily but now they're starting to make sense. Or are they starting to make sense? I want to fix things with Ran so bad that could it just be my subconscious or something; that's its reacting this way because I know it's what he wants?"

"There's only one way to find out," replied Ted softly. "Do what Randy suggests and just spend some time with Dwayne. Randy trusts you and your judgment so now it's up to you to do the same, John."

John lifted his gaze to meet Ted's. He slowly nodded and said, "I guess you're right."

"I always am," responded Ted with a smile.

* * *

"Randy, the least you could've done was focus out there! I mean, damn! I know you don't want to be in this storyline with me but tough shit; we are! For some reason you have agreed to do this so fucking do it right!" ranted Cody as he walked behind Randy towards the locker room.

"What the fuck are you talking about, Cody? That was a perfectly good match out there!" Randy stopped on his heels and spun around. "And you know damn well why I agreed to this storyline."

Cody sighed and shook his head. "Look, Randy, it may have been a good match but I don't do good matches. I do great matches! I'm trying to make a name for myself here and eventually have a title run and its not gonna happen with you holding me back!" He lowered his voice and shrugged. "I know you don't want any part of this storyline and I have to imagine the only reason this was even suggested in a creative meeting is because Hunter has no idea what happened between us. At this point, though, isn't it better if you just tell him so we could end this shit? It's not working!"

"I won't be telling Hunter a goddamned thing and neither will you, understood?" growled Randy, moving closer to Cody's face.

"If I didn't tell Hunter what happened after John beat the shit out of me and almost fucking killed me, I wont do it now, Randy." Cody rolled his eyes and shrugged. "What the fuck does it matter if he knows anyway? We got drunk and high and fucked! Big deal! Millions of people do it every night."

Cody crossed his arms over his chest. "Besides, you can't be embarrassed about it since you told Ted. So, in reality, it's not like no one knows."

"Just because some time has passed doesn't mean I'm spreading it around. Ted is my friend and he's the only one that knows besides all of us." Randy raised an eyebrow. "Right?"

Cody shrugged and went to move away. "Look, I have friends, too, OK…"

Randy's arm snapped forward and he grabbed Cody's, preventing him from moving further. His fingers dug into the younger man's skin as he pulled him back. "What the fuck have you done? If you've been blabbing what happened between us, Cody…"

Cody pulled his arm away and raised his head defiantly. "I have the right to tell my friends what happened. You think you were the only affected that night? Well, you weren't! So, by all means, you can continue telling your friends your version of the pity story you think happened and I'll tell my friends my version; otherwise known as the truth!" He smiled and shook his head. "You know what, forget it. I refuse to have this conversation with you again. You're always gonna think I did something wrong…"

"Because you did do something wrong, asshole!" interrupted Randy loudly.

"Despite the fact you don't even remember what happened that night!" continued Cody, ignoring Randy's protest. "You were so high that you don't even remember. I'll let you live in your fantasy land, though, where you think I damn near raped you. I'll let you keep your virtue or whatever the hell you wanna call it. All I ask is that you get your mind out of the gutter and focus it on this storyline. I won't let my career turn to the shit Ted's has turned to because of you."

Randy shook his head, an incredulous laugh escaping his lips. "Wow. Wow, man. You truly amaze me. I wish I could walk around and live in your fantasy world, Cody. It's really not an act, either. You truly believe all the shit coming out of your mouth, too! It's amazing!" He took a step back and nodded. "You know what; you're right. I'm gonna focus all my attention on our storyline because its business. I'm not gonna spend one single minute trying to figure you out because it's clear to me now that the look of remorse I think I see on your face sometimes is only in my head. You don't feel an ounce of remorse over what you've done and you never will and that's fine. We're co-workers and that's all we'll ever be."

Cody shrugged. "Pretty much." He turned on his heel and walked away.

Randy clenched his jaw and let his eyes close. He found himself bringing back an old anger management technique and counted to ten in his head before heading back to the locker room. He burst into the room, anxious to shower and dress and wait out the rest of the show in his and John's bus. From the corner of his eye he could see Cody enter the showers with a towel slung over his shoulder. Not wanting to run into the younger man, Randy collapsed onto the bench in front of his locker and started pulling out some clean clothes to wear.

"Hey, I'm glad I caught you before I had to go out there."

Randy looked up to meet John's gaze, the older man bouncing on the soles of his feet in preparation for his match. He found himself smiling at John's ever present enthusiasm. "So am I. I hope you have a better match than I did."

John bit his lip and stopped bouncing. "Don't be mad but I didn't watch. I got caught up talking to Ted."

"Hey, if there's any match you can miss, tonight's was the one." Randy sighed and laid the clean clothes on his lap. "I'm gonna shower and wait for you on the bus, OK."

John nodded and leaned down. "I know this goes against all kinds of therapy but…can I get a good luck kiss?"

Randy smiled and tugged John all the way down pulling the older man's face to his and kissing him softly. John moaned softly as Randy's tongue slid into his mouth. He took control of the kiss, swallowing Randy's low moan until the younger man pulled away.

"OK, I think that's enough luck."

John smiled and nodded. "See you in awhile, baby."

Randy watched as John sprinted out of the locker room, a small smile on his face, too. The sensation of being watched made him frown and he turned over, his eyes locking with Cody's. The smile faded from his face as he watched Cody smirk and shake his head as in disbelief. Randy's forehead creased into a frown and he turned away, an unwanted memory suddenly returning.

* * *

"_How did this happen, Cody?" asked Randy, repeating his earlier question. He began to pace around the room, his head throbbing with each step he took. "Last thing I remember is going off on Brock and you coming out into the patio. How did we get from there to here?"_

_Cody finally found his jeans and slid them on slowly. He met Randy's intense glare and slowly smiled. "He gave you something and it messed you up, Ran. I took care of you. I bought you up here and called John. I told him we had moved the party up to my room and you had passed out so he should go to sleep and not worry. After that, you said you wanted to repay my kindness. You were throwing yourself at me, Ran. You came up to me and started taking my clothes off…I mean, I wasn't going to stop you or turn you down. You know I've wanted this for a while now so…"_

"_Oh my God, stop. You're making me sick." Randy moved one arm around his waist, hugging his midsection tightly. "How could you let this have happened, Cody? You're supposed to be my friend!"_

"_Hey, like I said, you were throwing yourself at me!" Cody's voice rose in anger but confusion clouded his features. "You started taking your clothes off and coming at me!"_

"_I was drunk and high! I have never cheated on John and I never would. You know I would never do that when sober! You took advantage of the fact I wasn't!" Randy's voice also rose, booming throughout the room. _

"_Oh, don't give me that shit. You told me you were fine! I asked you if you were sure; if you understood what we were doing! You said you were; that you wanted it just as bad as I did. The last thing on your mind last night was John. You weren't thinking about him or anyone but me and you made it clear. Don't tell me I took advantage of you." Cody rolled his eyes, his voice full of conviction. "I know you're worried about John's reaction. I can promise you I'll be keeping my mouth shut. I didn't delude myself into thinking you actually cared about me."_

"_That's not the point, Cody." Randy's voice lowered slightly but the anger remained. "The point is that you knew I would never have done what we did last night. I know how you feel for me, Cody and I would never take advantage of that. Not only because I'm married but because you're one of my closest friends. I can't believe you let this happen. I thought you were better than this."_

"_Stop blaming me for this! You wanted it, you asked me for it! I tried to stop you but you didn't listen. What part of that don't you understand?" Cody raised his hands in frustration._

* * *

Randy shook his head, pushing away the horrible memory of his morning after with Cody but he couldn't get his former friend's words from earlier out of his head.

"…_you don't even remember what happened that night! You were so high that you don't even remember. I'll let you live in your fantasy land, though, where you think I damn near raped you. I'll let you keep your virtue or whatever the hell you wanna call it."_

Randy quickly stood, dropping the clothes from his hands and running out of the locker room. He jogged down the arena hallway, gasping by the time he ran up the stairs to the gorilla position. His loud footsteps caused John to spin around, the older man's eyes widening when he saw him.

"Ran, what are you doing? What's wrong?"

Randy grabbed John's arms, pulling him in for a tight hug. "I love you. I love you more than anyone, despite what I've done, John. I love you. Tell me you know that."

John pulled back slightly, a concerned look on his face. His entrance song suddenly blared through the arena and he glanced at the curtain separating them from the audience nervously. "Of course I know that, Ran. I love you, too, more than anyone."

Randy nodded and stepped back. "OK…OK. I just wanted to tell you that."

John nodded, a frown still on his face. "Are you sure everything's OK?"

"Fine, it's fine." Randy pushed him gently towards the curtain. "Go."

John glanced at him once more before moving forward, through the curtains and into the main arena. The cheers and boos filled the arena as he appeared and Randy slumped onto a crate backstage. He took a deep breath and tried to push aside any doubts Cody may have stirred up inside him. It seemed he still had a long way to go in building his own immunity against Cody…and in having faith in himself once more. He had no doubt that with John's support, though, he would get there sooner than later.

**A/N: Have a great week, all! REVIEW, please! **

**A/N 2: I changed my Twitter name again! It's now at FF_AuntJackie**


	29. Chapter 29

**A/N: Update time!**

Randy stared out the window as the bus sped along the dark highway. The images of other moving cars and of the moving landscape blurred in front of his eyes and he sighed. He could hear John moving around in the main part of the bus, his laughter as he chatted with their longtime bus driver drifting back to him. Randy's eyes lowered to look down at the shorts he had slid on once on the bus. He traced his fingers around the hem, his mind still focused on Cody's taunts from earlier in the night. Without warning, a random memory from years earlier popped into his head.

* * *

"_Shouldn't this rehab place be monitoring your phone calls, Orton? I mean, how many more of these am I gonna have to endure for the next couple months?"_

_Randy rolled his eyes and gripped the telephone tightly, his free hand shaking slightly as he ran it through his hair. "You could just stop picking up the phone, dumbass. I know you won't, though,"_

"_Is that so? Why won't I?" asked John, a small laugh escaping him. _

"_Well, you haven't so far," Randy replied back mockingly. "I think you get a hard on from me telling you how much of a piece of shit you are."_

"_Of course I do, Randy. Isn't that just what I would want to hear after so many years of friendship?" replied John sarcastically. _

"_Don't talk to me about years of friendship, Cena. You're the one who turned your back on me. I'm in this shithole and it's your doing! You could've talked Vince out of sending me here! You could've convinced Sam to not do this to me but you didn't! You agreed with everyone to send me here and screwed me in the process!"_

"_Yeah, I screwed you," interrupted John. "It had nothing to do with your wife finding you practically dead on your kitchen floor, right?"_

"_Fuck you, John," snarled Randy. He banged his free hand on the wall beside the payphone and rested his pounding head on the base of the phone. "You know the real reason you did this to me. You've always wanted me as more than a friend and I never gave in to it so you decided to get me back by fucking up my marriage, my career and committing me to this fucking hole! That's why you helped them all do this! Because you couldn't accept the fact that I couldn't be with someone as pathetic as you!"_

_John laughed in his ear. "Keep telling yourself that, Ran."_

"_And you keep pretending like it's not true," replied Randy. "There's no way I'm ever going to see you as anything other than the pathetic John that used to follow me around like a little puppy just hoping I would give him a taste. You know I'm too good for you."_

"_I don't see how you could see yourself as the better man in this situation, Randy. You're locked up in a rehab while I'm out living my life," _

"_What life could you possibly have without me?" asked Randy with a scoff. "I'm not around so you can't follow me around like my little lapdog anymore."_

"_Oddly enough, you're right. I realized I had been dedicating myself just a bit too much to you and all your drama so now that you're gone, I have plenty of time to dedicate to myself…and I'm enjoying it. While you're locked behind rehab doors, I'm discovering what it's like to be with normal people; people who don't need to get plastered and high every night to feel something and people who value a true friend when they see one."_

_Randy rolled his eyes. "Oh, please. Shut the fuck up, St. John. You make me physically sick."_

"_Well, I'm sorry I do," replied John somberly. _

"_God, you're just so fucking pathetic. I don't even know why I call you," said Randy angrily. _

"_Neither do I yet you continue to call me every night,"_

"_Then stop fucking picking up the phone, John,"_

"_I can't, Randy. If this is what it takes to make you better then I'll subject myself to it. Call me every night and tell me how pathetic I am and how I let you down and how you could never love me…I'll do whatever it takes to get you better. Even if that means getting you better means you no longer want me in your life,"_

_Randy let his eyes close and he sighed deeply, the anger gone from his body now. "Why did you let them put me in here? Why didn't you take me somewhere? We could've gone away together and I could've gotten better. You could've made me better, Johnny."_

"_I can't make you better, Randy. You have to do it on your own. You have to want to do it for yourself." John's voice pleaded with him over the phone. "You have so many people who love you and need you, including me. We don't want to see you destroy yourself but we can't force you not to. It has to come out of you, baby."_

_Randy's eyes narrowed and he shook his head. "Forget it. You're just useless; absolutely good for nothing. I can't depend on you. I just want you out of my life."_

"_Ran, please don't say things like that. I know you don't mean it but they still hurt. Please, Ran…"_

"_Fuck off, John,"_

* * *

"Hey, whatcha thinking about?"

Randy looked up and smiled, shaking his head at John's question. "Just reliving some of my greatest hits," he mumbled sarcastically.

John frowned and reached for Randy's hand, linking their fingers. "What are you talking about? Does this have something to do with your little moment at gorilla earlier? I wasn't going to pry but I gotta admit I'm curious to know where that came from."

Randy slowly nodded. "It's OK. I knew you would want to talk about it."

"Only if you want, though," replied John quickly.

Randy shrugged, his head lowering once more. He looked at his fingers interlocked with John's and let the silence linger for a few minutes. "It's my fault. I just let Cody get the best of me…and after that lecture I gave you about not letting him get to you."

"We're only human, Ran. We're gonna react to certain triggers and it's gonna take some time to learn not to," John smiled and let his fingers stroke the inside of Randy's thigh. Randy bit the inside of his lip as John smoothed over his skin. "He said some stuff and it just made me remember how horrible I was to you years ago, when I was in the rehab."

John frowned and shook his head. "Randy, why are you thinking about that? That was so long ago, baby. We moved past that."

"Not if it's still getting to me," Randy sighed and looked back out the window. "All it took was Cody reminding me today of how I threw myself at him to make me remember how horrible I was to you in there. My God, I would call you just so I could talk to you like shit every night and feel a little better about myself."

"Baby, stop doing that to yourself…"

"John," interrupted Randy. "Cody is right. I threw myself at him that night and I told him how I wanted to be with him. I remember it clearly. I've tried to push it away but I just can't but…you weren't in my head at that moment with Cody. It's like you didn't exist." He looked at John and shook his head. "It wasn't me who did it, though. Please tell me you understand what I mean by that."

"Of course I know that! If I didn't know that, I wouldn't be here right now!" John tugged Randy closer to him, their legs touching. "You weren't yourself because you weren't in your right mind, Ran. You had taken something and it changed you. It always changed you. Every time you took something you became like a different Randy; the one that felt he didn't deserve anything but what the drugs provided for him. The drugs made you feel invincible; like the strongest guy in the world who nothing or no one could hurt and who needed no one. The reality was, though, that if you were so strong, you wouldn't have needed the drugs so badly in the first place. All they did was bring out your insecurities, Ran which for some reason, included some about us as a couple."

"We've been over that," mumbled Randy under his breath. "I don't want to go over it again."

"We don't have to," answered John quickly. "You're better now and that's all that matters."

"Then why can Cody still trigger me so quickly?" asked Randy.

"Because he's good at being an asshole and we both need to get better at letting assholes not get to us. I think as long as we're honest about it, though and where our relationship stands, we'll get there one day." John smiled, his fingers still on Randy's skin. "We already have half the battle won, anyway."

Randy raised an eyebrow, his eyes darting down to look at John's hand as it disappeared under his shorts. "We have?"

"Yeah," John's smile widened. "You know I'm not gonna leave you for some perfect Stepford husband and I know you're not gonna leave me for some wild child type husband. We've realized we're meant for each other."

Randy sighed softly. "I guess…" He smiled at John's face instantly dropping and quickly reached for his hand. "Just kidding, babe. Now, let me see those wandering fingers of yours…"

John twirled his fingers around Randy's, a little annoyed to have been pulled away from the younger man's leg. He didn't protest, knowing Randy didn't do it out of anger or spite but out of a will to not let things proceed further.

"Johnny, I just don't want us to do anything we're gonna regret…" started Randy, tightening his hand around John's.

"I know! Trust me, I know. I was just thinking the same thing," responded John quickly. He smiled sheepishly. "Sorry for trying to cop a cheap feel,"

"Hey, if I really minded I would've pulled your hand away a long ago." Randy smiled and lifted John's hands to his lips, brushing a gentle kiss over his knuckles. He looked at the watch on his hand and sighed. "Can we go to bed now? I just want this day to end already."

John groaned and shook his head. "No."

"No, what?" asked Randy with a frown.

"We're going home to Tampa and I have lunch scheduled with Dwayne and I just don't want to do it. If I don't go to sleep then maybe tomorrow will never come…" John let his eyes close as he rested his head on the cool plate-glass window.

Randy smiled and tugged John forward, letting the older man's head fall to his chest. "Hey, where's my Super Cena? You're gonna let a lunch with that diva freak you out? He's nothing, Johnny."

"He's a little too…" John frowned, desperately trying to think of the correct word. "A little too intense for my liking; especially lately."

"Hmm," murmured Randy in agreement.

John raised his head from Randy's chest and smiled. "But you've always known that, haven't you?"

"I've only ever known what I feel, John. That's why I want you to make your own decision about him based on how you feel. Whether it be cutting him out because you truly believe there's something off about him or realizing that it was all in our heads and choosing to befriend him," Randy bent down, letting his nose brush over John's. "And I trust you to make that decision starting tomorrow at lunch."

"Befriend him? I doubt it. I just don't want to work with him and I don't want to talk to him and have lunch with him and pretend like this is something I'm going to enjoy. I just want him to disappear out of my life." whined John.

"Stop it. He's just a guy; a guy who means nothing to you like half the other guys you've worked with over the years. Do the job then and cut him off. It's kind of simple, John." replied Randy.

John rolled his eyes. "I still don't know. I may need a little more encouragement."

"Don't push it, Cena," Randy smiled and moved his lips over John's briefly.

John smiled and lifted his hand to Randy's face, smoothing over the side gently. "That was nice but not what I meant."

"So, then what do you want?" replied Randy, his tone deepening.

"You…in bed," whispered John.

Randy's eyes widened and he pulled back. "John,"

"I mean to sleep!" added John quickly, a laugh escaping him. "I just want us to sleep together. I need a good night's sleep and I always get one when we're together. It's been months I don't sleep well. It's a miracle I don't have bags under my eyes to rival Punk's."

"Oh," Randy turned over, his eyes on the large bed that he and John once did share. "I guess just sleeping would be OK." He stood up and tugged John towards the bed, reaching behind him to shut off the light.

The men settled themselves in the big bed, some awkwardness lingering now that they were together once more in what used to be a familiar situation. John placed the covers over his lower half but remained straight, unsure if he should turn over to Randy.

Randy could feel the tension radiating from John's body and smiled to himself. He knew John was frustrated; hell, so was he. Living together as a couple and sharing the affection of a couple but stopping when they got to the bedroom was not fun. However, as uncomfortable as it was for the men, it was working and both Randy and John knew they would do whatever it took to get their marriage back to normal.

"John,"

John looked to his right at Randy's call. "Yeah,"

"Turn over," Randy said with a smile.

John turned his body to the side, still leaving a small gap between the men. Randy reached his hand forward to rest on John's chest. ""Take off your shirt. I wanna feel you."

"What? Really?" asked John, his eyes wide.

Randy laughed softly and nodded. "I figure we'll sleep better like that." He sat up and quickly took off his own t-shirt before lying back down.

John smiled and lifted his body off momentarily, peeling his t-shirt off his body. Randy reached his hand out to trace John's chest lightly. John took his hand, kissing his fingertips before pulling him in close to his body so their skin was touching. Randy closed his eyes as John traced his fingers up his face.

"Isn't this better?" he murmured.

John smiled and sighed. "I don't know yet. It could also be a worse form of torture. I don't know how I'm supposed to lay here with you and just go to sleep."

Randy laughed gently. "You can do it, Super Cena."

John shrugged. "I don't know…it's hard to stay away from you, baby."

Randy smiled and wrapped his arm around John's back, caressing it slowly. "Trust me; I know the feeling."

John closed his eyes as Randy made himself comfortable on his chest. He felt the younger man's chest slow down as his breathing evened out. He looked down and saw Randy's eyes closed, the man now resting peaceful, and he bent forward to place a kiss on his forehead. He ran his fingers over Randy's face and saw his lips curved into a smile.

"I'm trying to sleep, Cena. Are you trying to distract me?"

John smiled and ran his fingertips over Randy's lips. "No, if I was trying to distract you, I would move my hands lower."

Randy's smile widened and his eyes cracked open. "Promises, promises..."

John raised an eyebrow and stared into Randy's eyes as he moved his hand down his side to his hips. He ran a finger over the crotch of Randy's pajamas and the younger man's eyes fluttered closed.

"John,"

"Randy," John replied teasingly before leaning forward and pressing his lips to Randy, who leaned into the kiss. He moved his hand to cup John's neck and pull him forward. John's hands lingered on Randy's hips, stroking the skin above and around his crotch.

John moaned as Randy caressed his neck down to his shoulders until they finally broke apart, breathing heavily.

"All right, stop. I can't take anymore." Randy groaned as he buried his head in John's neck.

John smiled and moved his hands up to stroke Randy's back. "I know, baby. Soon,"

Randy pulled back and nodded, smiling as he leaned forward to kiss John again. "I love you, Johnny. I want nothing more than to get us back to normal."

John nodded. "I know. I love you, too."

He pulled Randy in close to him and kissed his lips gently, the kiss melting into a long, deep, kiss within seconds. He ran his hands over Randy's back, the younger man moaning into his mouth as his own hands began to explore John's body. Randy pulled him in close so their groins touched. John groaned as he felt his hips react automatically, grinding down on Randy's crotch, their hardened members rubbing against one another through the soft fabric of their pajama bottoms.

They broke off again, panting.

John rolled away from Randy and lay on his back. "OK, so we really have to stop this time."

Randy nodded and sighed loudly. "Yeah. Let's just get some sleep, OK." He smiled and slowly turned his body to look at John. "You've got a big day tomorrow."

John groaned and shook his head. "Don't remind me, please!"

Randy laughed softly and nodded. "Fine. Don't think about it but just know that I know you will be fine. I have so much faith in you and in us, Johnny."

He laid his head on John's chest and felt his arms wrap around him tightly. "Me, too, baby. It's what's keeping me going."

John closed his eyes and tried to sleep but the knot in his stomach wouldn't let him. He knew that even now with Randy in his arms, sleep would still elude him.

**A/N: REVIEW, please!  
A/N: Had to mention Punk's eyebags because OMG, he's a beautiful boy but he desperately needs to relax with some cucumber slices over his eyes at one point! **


	30. Chapter 30

**A/N: Update time! Thanks for the great reviews, guys! **

John tapped his fingers on the table, his eyes scanning the quiet room he had been ushered into by the hostess. He lifted his wrist up and glanced at his watch to see the time had only moved forward 2 minutes since the last time he looked. A soft sigh escaping him, he looked back towards the door, willing Dwayne to finally appear and their lunch to begin.

The flight to Tampa and early morning had passed like a blur…mostly because he'd barely slept. Even with Randy in his arms, peace had escaped him. He'd spent the entire night listening to the younger man's soft breathing as his stomach churned, dreading the time he'd have to face Dwayne. When morning had finally arrived, he had plastered a smile on his face for Randy's sake and then threw himself into work, reading over the hundred of emails he got on a daily basis while Randy watched a movie and let him be. There was no doubt in John's head that Randy knew what he was feeling and was just giving him time to process his feelings on his own. Randy didn't want him to make a decision based on his own feeling toward Dwayne and John had to appreciate that. Despite his dread over the lunch, he realized this was something he would have to do.

"Hey, John! You look a million miles away!"

John's head snapped up at the sound of Dwayne's deep voice and he forced the smile back on his face. "Yeah, just going over all the things I have to do in my head." He kicked out the chair across from him and motioned Dwayne to sit down. "I'm sure you're just as busy, though so maybe we should start going over some stuff…"

"Already rushing me off?" Dwayne shook his head, a small smile on his face as he slid into his chair.

John sighed and lowered his eyes. "No, I'm not…I'm sorry. I've just got a lot on my plate and I'm not gonna be in Tampa for long so…" He ended off with a shrug.

Dwayne frowned. "Aren't you staying in your house here? Or did you go back to Randy's in St. Louis?"

"Uh, my house is Randy's house," replied John with an equal frown. "And vice versa."

Dwayne quickly shook his head and held up a hand. "Of course it is. I'm sorry. That came out wrong." He turned his gaze to the waitress who approached them, menus in hand, and flashed her a smile.

John stared at Dwayne intently as he gave his order to the young woman and remained silent. The woman's eyes suddenly turned to him and he quickly shot off his order. The woman smiled and took off with their menus, leaving the table in silence once more.

"Anyway, to answer your question, I'll be in Tampa for a couple of days until we hit the road again," said John, unable to take the silence any longer.

"Oh, that's nice," replied Dwayne with a nod. He took a sip of his water and raised his eyebrow slightly. "Is Randy back in St. Louis?"

"Why does that matter?" shot back John. "Does Randy have anything to do with why we're here?"

"Whoa, John! What the hell is wrong with you? You've been an asshole to me since the minute I walked in here!" Dwayne's eyes widened as he set the glass down on the table. "I'm trying to make conversation here, man. Like friends do when they meet for lunch,"

"Except that we're not friends! We're co-workers so there's no reason to talk about anything but work," replied John in annoyance.

Dwayne frowned and shook his head. "John, I don't understand what you're talking about. Yes, we're co-workers but I also thought we were friends. I mean, the reason we put on such a great show is because of the chemistry we have. Look at all the things we've shared…"

"Don't fucking go there," John's voice lowered but the threat was still loud enough.

"I meant in the ring and in this company, John. I'm not talking about anything else. It seems to be only you who's focused on that." Dwayne's voice also lowered. He looked around the room and shrugged. "Is that why you're being so weird today? Because you're thinking about what happened between us?

"Not a day goes by that I don't think about what happened between us," mumbled John

Dwayne smirked. "I'm flattered."

"Don't be." John rolled his eyes. "I think about what happened between us and I'm disgusted because I know it was the worst mistake of my life. It could've ruined everything."

"Well it didn't. Nothing is ruined and everything is just peachy so let's just move on," Dwayne looked up as the waitress approached with their food. "It's really not that big of a deal anyway,"

John frowned and moved his plate towards him. "It was to me."

"That's because you've always been too much of a bleeding heart." Dwayne bit into his burger, chewing quietly for a few seconds before speaking again. "Especially for anything Randy related."

John lifted his eyes up from where they had been focusing on his food. "Is that so?"

Dwayne shrugged. "Just calling it like I see it. I've heard a lot about your relationship with Randy from my buddies and…"

"Hasn't anyone told you that you can't believe everything you hear? Most of it is bullshit anyway," replied John coldly.

"Well, I've also seen a lot since I've been back," Dwayne smiled and shook his head. "Did Randy tell you I finally met Alanna a couple weeks back?"

John's face hardened at the mention of Alanna's name. Of all the things he was willing to discuss, Alanna was not one of them. "Yes, he mentioned it. So did Ally. Thank you for being so nice to her."

"It's not hard to be nice to her when she was such a sweet girl. She must have picked that up from you. Randy has never seemed to be the most heartwarming individual," answered Dwayne with a laugh.

"He can be. It all depends on who he's dealing with at the moment and what the person is saying." John smirked and leaned forward on the table, his lunch practically forgotten. "He seems to think you took a shot at him during that small conversation…in front of our kid."

Dwayne frowned. "What? What shot? I barely spoke to him. He was the one that came charging down the hall like a bat out of hell and ripped Alanna away from me. Then, he starts going off on me and telling me to never come near her again like I was any danger to her!" He leaned towards John, one hand on his chest. "I have a child; a daughter, John. I would never hurt a child but that's how Randy acted."

"I don't think he ever thought you would hurt her, D. He's just very overprotective of Alanna. Especially because of what's happened between us…but that's beside the point," John shook his head dismissively.

"So, then I don't understand. What shot does he think I took, John?"

John sighed and lowered his gaze. "What did you guys talk about in that hallway? Can you tell me…word for word?"

Dwayne shrugged. "Probably not word for word but I can tell you what I remember." He frowned as he thought. "I remember telling him how Alanna and I were talking about movies. I had mentioned to her that I knew you and Randy so she was ok with talking to me since we were friends."

"Is that it?" John looked back up at Dwayne's face and stared at him intently.

"I think so," Dwayne's frown deepened. "I mean, Randy was so upset and there was nothing I could do to calm him down. I even told him how happy I was for you and him being able to work things out and nothing. He was just furious."

John sighed and shook his head. "It couldn't have been easy for him to see you again after…and then to see you next to Ally…he didn't take that statement well."

"John, I hate to say it but that's bullshit. It's absolutely ridiculous that he would get pissed by me wishing you guys well," cut in Dwayne, his tone dripping with annoyance. "What happened between us was an accident; a one night mistake. There's no point in acting like it's the end of the world. I mean, you and Randy still found a way to make peace with it…or haven't you?"

Dwayne leaned back in his chair. "Is this still causing problems between you? Is he giving you a hard time about working with me?"

John held up a hand. "I don't feel comfortable talking about anything having to do with my family to you Dwayne. Just let it go and for future reference, maybe you should steer clear of Randy and our daughter."

"Well, you just answered my question," mumbled Dwayne. He shook his head and stared at John. "So, because Randy has a problem with our drunken mistake, you're just gonna back away from our friendship? That's really shitty, John."

John frowned. "Is it really when I don't even know what friendship you're talking about?"

"What? So, now we're not even friends?" asked Dwayne, his eyes wide.

John shrugged. "Look, all I know is that when you were around before, full time wrestling, you barely spared me a glance let alone a word. You had your own group of friends and didn't allow anyone else to breach your inner circle. I was fine with it because I can be just as anti-social and prefer to be alone than surrounded by a bunch of assholes that pretend to have my back. Then you left and were gone for years and suddenly now that you've been back, and I use that term lightly, for a year, you consider us friends. You've been here like a week out of the year if you combine all the days you've actually appeared on TV and all we've talked about during that time is work. We've never attempted to talk about anything else and become friends, D."

"Then, why was I the one you came to after Randy cheated on you and broke your heart?" asked Dwayne quietly. "Why was I the one you chose to spill your guts to and collapse in front of?"

"Are you fucking kidding me? I didn't go to you! I didn't choose you! We met up to discuss work and I got plastered. It loosened me up and I made the biggest mistake of my life. I would never have talked about anything having to do with me and Randy if I wasn't drunk, Dwayne!" John struggled to keep his voice down, his temper on the verge of explosion.

"Look, all I'm saying is you must have felt comfortable enough with me to break down like that, John. Booze or not," Dwayne shrugged.

John closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "Enough already. I don't want to talk about any of this again. I've spent too long going over it in my head and wishing I can turn back time so that it never happened." He let his eyes open and placed his hands on the table. "We're coworkers, Dwayne, and that's it. I don't honestly feel that you want a friendship with me and because of that, I can't consider us friends. I do appreciate how you've kept quiet what's happened between us and what you know about Randy, though and I have to commend you on that. It's something very personal and Randy and I agreed to keep it quiet because the last thing we want is to become fodder for the gossip mill. It's not something we're proud of."

Dwayne nodded. "I promised you I would keep it quiet and I intend to keep that promise, John because it's what a friend would do. Despite you not considering me a friend, I think this proves I consider you one."

John lowered his head, a small blush creeping up his face as he contemplated Dwayne's words. "Thank you,"

Dwayne shrugged. "Look, Johnny. Don't go crazy over this. It happened and it's time you let it go. I was a momentary lapse of judgment bought on by your husband's betrayal. Hell, anyone would've had a crazy moment just like that. It's really not that strange. You have to let it go even if Randy can't and it seems like he can't. I mean, he's the one still lashing out and probably filling your head with all this nonsense. In my opinion, he has no right to even act like that since he was the first one to fuck someone else. He's still got a lot of growing up to do."

John frowned, the blush gone from his face now. "Don't do that. Don't put Randy down in front of me. It won't win you any points, Dwayne. There's a lot you don't know about what happened. Trust me when I say, I'm guiltier than Randy is in this situation."

"Really? Or are you just still taking all the blame and cleaning up his messes," Dwayne raised an eyebrow. "Like you always have?"

John glared at Dwayne and pushed his chair back. "Wow. You see, comments like that are why I don't consider you a friend. No more lunches, emails or calls. We'll work together one more time and then we go on with our lives."

"John, really…" started Dwayne, a laugh escaping him.

"Yes, really," cut off John before turning away from the table and walking away. He felt his annoyance only grow with each step he took, the temptation to turn around and punch Dwayne in the mouth for his comment. The man had no idea what went on in his personal life yet felt the need, like most other people he encountered, to talk about it. When would people realize their advice on his relationship was not wanted nor requested? It seemed anyone who'd ever come in contact with Randy during his worst moments assumed he was still like that now so many years later. He was never given the benefit of change like others were and it infuriated John more than it did the younger man himself, who took it all in stride.

As John climbed into his car and bought the engine to life, he found his anger slowly fading as he headed for his home. Despite the annoying end the lunch had bought, he was happy Randy had urged him to do it. Facing Dwayne once more for a one on one conversation was just what he needed. While the man had not tried anything incredibly inappropriate like hitting on him, he had said some things that rubbed on John's nerves and boundaries. That alone was enough to let John know a friendship with the older man was not possible. They would have to remain platonic co-workers and that was it. He could only hope that Dwayne would keep his secret despite John clearly telling him they would never be friends.

John pulled the car into his garage and quickly exited. Opening the back door and sliding into the house, he closed his eyes and inhaled deeply the smell of whatever Randy was cooking. He left the car keys on the hall table and walked into the kitchen, smiling at the sight that met him.

Randy was dressed in shorts and a plain white t-shirt, large oven mitts on his hands as he pulled a muffin pan out of the oven. He set the hot rolls on the stove top and took off the gloves, basting the bread with melted butter and turning to stir another pot. He jumped at first when he felt the hands at his waist and the lips on the nape of his neck, but it took him mere seconds to adjust and to lean back against John.

"Smells good in here."

"What'd you expect?" Randy turned in John's arms and gazed into his eyes. "Welcome home." Their lips and tongues met briefly before Randy pulled back with a sigh.

"I'm glad to be home. I missed you." John closed his eyes and rubbed his nose against Randy's.

Randy pulled back so that he could see into John's eyes. "You were gone for a couple of hours, John. How could you miss me?"

John laughed and shrugged. "I just did."

Randy smiled and stared at him intently. "How was lunch?"

John's face darkened and he shook his head. "Not exactly what I expected yet exactly what I expected. It was…odd. I didn't get a sense of him wanting to try anything with me but he still said some things that I didn't like so I made it clear to him that we're never gonna be friends so his whole email, phone call thing with me has to stop. We're gonna work together one more time and then call it a day."

"Well, I trust you did what you think is right, Johnny." Randy took a step back towards John and looped his arms around the older man's waist. "We don't have to talk about it anymore if you don't want to."

John smiled. "I don't mind talking about it with you, Ran. I'm just thankful you pushed me to go to this today. I had to do this for my own frame of mind but without you pushing me I would've just stayed in bed all day."

"Well, I guess it was my turn. For most of our life together it's been you pushing me so…" Randy shrugged and went to move away but John held onto him tightly. He stared into Randy's eyes intently. "I am so proud of everything you've overcome, Randy. I don't think I could ever have been as strong as you have been. Even without me in your life, I have no doubt that you would still be the same amazing man you are now. You are the strongest person I know and I am so proud that you're mine."

Randy raised an eyebrow and smiled. "Wow…thanks. What did they serve at that lunch?"

John laughed and patted Randy playfully on the backside. "I'm being serious, Ran,"

"I know. Thank you, Johnny. My only goal is to make you and Al proud every day," Randy rested his forehead against John's. "I know how many people still think I'm a fuckup and how many still expect me to ruin my life again but I don't care about them. I don't feel the need to prove anything to anyone. I just want to make my family proud of the man I have become."

"And you do, baby. Every single day," replied John quickly.

Randy gently touched his mouth to John's lips, shivering at the sensations. John's firm hands slid up his hips and over his back, urging him to move closer and he turned his head so that their mouths fit. His hum of satisfaction was interrupted by the stove's timer going off.

"I gotta get that out of the oven…"

John nodded and reluctantly let Randy pull away at his soft whisper. He sighed and headed for the living room, throwing his body on the couch. Figuring he could distract himself with some television, he quickly turned on the set and tried to focus on the sport news of the day. The sound of Randy's footsteps approaching soon distracted him and he welcomed the younger man on the couch beside him.

"What are we watching?" he asked with a smile.

John shrugged. "I don't know. I seem to be distracted all of the sudden."

Randy laughed and shook his head. "You're so corny, Cena."

"OK..." John watched as Randy shifted and tried to get comfortable, his t-shirt dipping low enough to expose his collarbone momentarily. His eyes were drawn to the patch of skin and John leaned forward and pressed his lips to the exposed skin, gently tugging the fabric down further. Randy sighed, welcoming the tremble that coursed through him.

"Johnny,"

John pulled Randy close, thrusting his tongue into the younger man's mouth, ravaging the soft insides until he was whimpering with need and his lips until they were swollen with his attention.

"You belong to me." He whispered as he pressed kisses along Randy's neck. "And only me. I love you so much, Ran,"

A moan escaped Randy's lips as John bit the sensitive skin of his neck, sucking relentlessly until there was a good-sized mark on the tan skin, partially hidden by his tattoos. He shook with pleasure as John's tongue licked the mark gently. "Johnny, stop…we can't. Not yet."

John groaned inwardly in frustration but respected Randy's wishes and pulled away. Randy looked at him with a smile and shook his head. "No, I mean, not yet because I don't want to do this here. Let's go upstairs."

John's eyes widened. "What? Are you serious?"

Randy nodded. "Yeah…aren't you? I don't think it's that horrible of an idea. I mean, I think we're ready…again," He laughed and shrugged. "What do you think? Think we've made enough progress to not fuck it up again?"

John smiled and slowly nodded. "Yeah, I really think we have. I think we're ready…again."

Randy's smile widened and he tugged John up with him as we stood. "Then, let's go Cena. Let's see if you still got it."

"Baby, I never lost it," replied John with a smirk as he followed Randy up the stairs. The younger man returned his smirk and licked his lips, causing John's pants to tighten even further. Without another word, he picked Randy up and tossed him over his shoulder, ignoring the yelp of protest that escaped his lips, and hurried the rest of the way down the hall and into their bedroom.

**A/N: So, I shall leave you hanging but will update soon with some Centon loving. A giant storm is headed for NYC so unless I lose power, I will spend the snowy days writing! **


	31. Chapter 31

**A/N: Update time! I added a flashback revealing some of John and Dwyane's fateful night together. To all my readers waiting for their one-shots, I am working on them and they will be up soon, OK! **

_One year ago…_

"_Hey, John! What's up?"_

_John looked up from his cup and blinked rapidly, his eyes already struggling to focus after his third drink. They finally settled on Dwayne's figure sliding into a seat across from him. "Hey. What took you so long?"_

_Dwayne frowned at him. "Long? I got here in like half an hour. It's not like you gave me much notice."_

_John shrugged. "I'm in town while you're in town so I figured, why not meet and talk about work?" He finished the liquid in his glass and motioned the bartender for another. "Besides, I need the distraction."_

_John saw Dwayne's frown deepen as he took his fourth drink and downed it within a few seconds. _

"_It would appear so. How many of those have you had already?"_

"_Doesn't matter," replied John. He closed his eyes and played with the empty glass on the bar counter. _

"_John, no offense but…" Dwayne slid his chair closer to John and lowered his voice. "It doesn't look like you're in the right frame of mind to talk about work tonight."_

"_I'm fine," John let the glass slide to the end of the bar, grabbing the bartender's attention and ordering another. "Just want to enjoy myself a little. We can have a couple of drinks and talk business, can't we?"_

_Dwayne shrugged. "Hey, if you think so…" He placed his own drink order as the bartender came with John's. "So, suffice to say, I think we kicked ass last year all the way up to Mania and at Mania itself but I know we want to make round 2 even better. We won't be able to get into it as much until after Elimination Chamber because I'll be busy with Punk until then but I have some ideas about how to get us off to the right start…" He frowned and looked at John carefully. _

"_John, are you even listening to me?"_

_John quickly nodded and lifted his gaze from where it had been boring into the wooden bar countertop. "Yeah, yeah. You'll be busy with Punk but then you'll be tearing into me. Sounds good,"_

"_All right, John. I'm not gonna do this. I enjoy hanging with you and all but your mind is obviously not here right now and I'm not gonna sit here and talk to myself." Dwayne stood up and shook his head. "I don't even know why you bothered to call me to come down here."_

_John watched as Dwayne turned to walk away and quickly reached for his hand. "No, wait! Don't leave, please. I just needed someone to talk to and distract me…I didn't have anyone else to call,"_

_Dwayne rolled his eyes. "That's when you call a friend, John."_

"_Find me one and I will," replied John. He sighed and let go of Dwayne's arm. "Forget it. Just go,"_

_Dwayne stared at John intently before slowly lowering himself back to his seat. "What the hell is wrong with you? Why aren't you having this meltdown with someone else? You're John fucking Cena and you're telling me you have no one but me?"_

_John laughed and shrugged. "Guess so…sad, ain't it. Ain't got no friends, ain't got no partner…"_

"_Where the hell is Randy?" asked Dwayne, watching as John downed the remaining liquid in his cup. _

"_Probably with his dick stuck up Cody's ass again," replied John with another laugh. _

_Dwayne's eyes widened. "What? Randy cheated on you?"_

"_Yeah," John sighed, all laughter gone now. "And no…it's complicated."_

"_Not really, John. It's not complicated at all." Dwayne shrugged and ordered another drink for himself. "Either he fucked Cody or he didn't."_

_John remained silent and stared at the empty cup. "Well, he did. He admitted it."_

"_I'm sorry, John." Dwayne reached for John's hand and patted it awkwardly. "I didn't know you guys were having problems."_

"_Well, neither did I but all it took was Brock's return to bring back old Randy and all the old problems we used to have."_

_Dwayne shook his head. "I can't believe Randy would do that to you. I mean, after all these years and all you've been through together. Jesus, the shit you put up with for that kid and this is how he repays you? He screws you over like this? He's an asshole, John. You deserve better; much better."_

_John looked down at his hand, enveloped by Dwayne's. "I know,"_

_Dwayne smiled and squeezed John's hand. "Do you really? Do you know how amazing you are?"_

_John looked up, his eyes locking with Dwayne's. "What?"_

_Dwayne laughed softly. "Come on, Johnny. You're not gonna tell me you don't know how amazing of a man you are. You're sweet and giving and so selfless and gorgeous…do you have any idea how many people want you? Randy must be a fool to do anything to jeopardize losing you."_

"_I guess he didn't see me that way," whispered John. _

"_Well, then he is a fool." Dwayne interlocked his fingers around John's and shook his head. "You're too good for him, Johnny. You're too good to be sitting in a bar and getting plastered over some loser who doesn't realize he has what so many others want. Don't let this defeat you. Move on to something better…someone better who will treat you like his most prized gift. Someone like…"_

"_Can we get out of here?" interrupted John, squeezing Dwayne's hand tightly as he stood. "I wanna get out of here and have some fun. I don't want to think about Randy anymore."_

_Dwayne smiled and nodded. "We can go and do anything you want. But first," He looked over at the bartender and motioned for two more drinks. "Let's toast to your newfound lease on life,"_

"_Gladly," John smiled and reached for the drink the bartender placed on the counter. "Newfound lease, indeed."_

* * *

"Hey, babe. What are you doing out here? It's cold,"

John turned to look at the open balcony door and smiled when he saw Randy's body framing it. The younger man was undressed but for a blanket circling his hips and John couldn't help but let his eyes travel over the exposed skin he'd just finish feasting on hours earlier. "Couldn't sleep and I didn't want to wake you so I figured I'd come out here."

Randy frowned. "Well, this is odd. Usually it's your old ass falling asleep right after sex. Not mine,"

John rolled his eyes but smiled as Randy strolled over to him. "It's a little too cold out here for you to be lounging, John."

"Then come keep me warm, gorgeous," John tugged Randy forward by the sheet covering his middle. Randy smiled and lowered his body down to the lounge chair John was currently occupying. He slid in between John's spread legs, his hips subconsciously thrusting forward when he felt John's erection through the thin boxer shorts, the only clothes he wore. John's arms immediately wrapped around his back, smoothing over the goose bumps on his skin.

"What's worrying you, Johnny?" whispered Randy, his lips grazing over John's neck and stopping to place kiss after kiss on the cool skin. "Why can't you sleep?"

John sighed, his hold on Randy tightening. "I guess I'm having a moment like yours when all I do is think about my giant mistake."

Randy lifted his head and smiled down at John. "Why are you doing that? Don't you hate it when I do that?"

"You can't control the mind sometimes, baby. It likes to fuck with you even during the happiest of times," John reached up a hand to trace Randy's lips. "I wish I could control it, though."

Randy kissed the tip of John's finger and smiled. "You gotta fight it, baby. Just like you tell me to do." He lowered his head back down to John's chest. "You're such an amazing man, Johnny. You're beautiful and brilliant and loving and you're all mine and I still can't believe it sometimes…"

"Well, believe it," interrupted John, his fingers grasping Randy's chin and tilting it up. "I will always be yours just like you will always be mine and no one can change that. No matter how hard they try."

Randy slid up John's body to place his mouth over his in a slow kiss. John wrapped his arms around Randy's back, running up the cool skin. Randy moaned into the kiss, his hand trailing gentle patterns along John's jaw and neck. The kiss seemed to go on forever, and by the time it was over neither man could breathe, their hearts pounding in their chests.

"I love you, Johnny." Randy whispered.

"I love you too, Ran. I love you more than anything. I don't want us to ever part again, baby." John gently stroked Randy's face, his voice thick with emotion. "I will always be so sorry for what I did with Dwayne and for how weak I was at that moment. I let him play with my head and convince me you didn't love me and value me…"

Randy sat up and pulled John up towards him, their chests pressed together. He kissed him briefly, stopping his flow of words. "Stop it, John. He lied to you for whatever reason. It doesn't matter, though. You know they were lies. You know how much I love you. I'm just sorry that I made you doubt it even for one second with the way I was acting with Brock."

John shook his head and gripped Randy's hips tightly. "I should've talked to you about it and not let it eat away at me and drive me crazy. I should've known better than to think you were gonna pull away from me like before. I've seen the change in you. I still see it every day. I know how proud you are of yourself and I am so fucking proud of you every single day. I shouldn't have thought the worst immediately."

Randy moved his fingertips over the back of John's neck in a gentle caress. He shook his head and bent to place another kiss on his lips before pulling back with a sigh. "Let's try to stop apologizing to each other for our mistakes and just really forgive each other, Johnny. We can't really forgive each other until we just let things go and start trying to forget."

John ran his hands up Randy's sides, his fingers dipping under the sheet. "You're right,"

"I always am, Cena," Randy smirked, his fingers in John's hair. John smiled and pulled him closer, his hands grasping Randy's ass and pressing him tightly against his groin. When he felt John's tongue slide along his bottom lip, Randy opened his mouth to allow the other man entrance. He massaged John's tongue with his own, a rush of desire coursing straight to his dick when John sucked on his tongue.

"Johnny..." Randy moaned the man's name as John trailed kisses over his jaw and down to his neck. He tilted his head, allowing the man more room, biting his lip to stop another moan from escaping his mouth.

"I want you," John moaned against the skin of Randy's neck.

"You have me," Randy wrapped his arms around John's neck, bringing the man's lips to his own once more, kissing him hard.

John kissed him back, hard and passionately. Randy felt himself sinking into the pleasures of the man's mouth, wanting, aching, for more.

"You're so beautiful, Ran," John whispered as he pulled the younger man even closer, pressing his body against Randy's. Randy let out a sharp moan when John trailed his lips along his jaw line to his neck and felt teeth nipping at his skin. John's warm mouth covered a spot on his neck, just beneath his ear and sucked on his skin. "Oh god..." he muttered, his hands moving to encircle the man's waist, trying to not dig his fingers in John's sides.

John leaned his body away a bit more, so that his chest wasn't pressed against Randy's and slid his hands up his thighs, tugging on the blanket Randy wore. He felt Randy's body shift up to allow him to pull the blanket off. "Stand up and switch with me,"

Randy stood up, the soft blue blanket drifting to his feet and then the rush of cool air hitting against his exposed flesh. John sat up and ran his hands up Randy's thighs, his erection throbbing before John's lips. John licked his lips and stood, letting Randy take his place on the lounge chair.

Once Randy was settled, John ran his hands up and down his chest. He moaned softly when he felt his fingers brushing over his nipples, and then his lips were at Randy's neck again. Unable to help himself, Randy arched against him. "John..." his voice hitched when he felt John's fingers grazing along his abs.

John smiled, bringing his head down so that they were kissing again and his hands resumed their explorations of Randy's chest. They roamed lower even as he slid his body off of Randy's legs, moving his hand so that he was brushing against his length. Randy moaned softly, his eyes drifting closed. He didn't know when it happened, but John was soon on his knees on the floor in front of Randy, both his hands now at Randy's waist.

"So beautiful," he heard John mutter a moment before he felt something like liquid velvet running along the length of his dick. Randy let out his breath in a harsh moan, "Baby…"

John used his tongue against him, running along the length of Randy's dick before taking him in his mouth, working him with both his hands and his lips. It was all he could do to not arch against John, the urge and need to get closer, to have more of himself taken into that warm heat. He felt John leaning up a little and lowering his mouth over him even more and he let out a harsh breath.

"John...oh God..." he moved his hand from his sides to John's head.

"You taste so good," John muttered when he came up for air a moment later. "God, Randy, you taste so damn good..."

Randy wanted the feeling to last forever, but he knew that he wouldn't be able to hold out with John using both his hand and his mouth on him. His movements sped up, causing Randy's breath to become even more ragged and the urge to arch against John was even stronger now. He felt his body begin to tighten and he knew that he wasn't going to be able to last much longer.

"John...I'm so close, baby..." Randy moaned, sinking against the chair cushions even more, his fingers holding John's head tightly.

"Let go, Randy..."John whispered, licking along the length of Randy's dick again. "I want you to, baby,"

Randy's eyes squeezed shut at hearing those words and he allowed himself to fall even deeper into the arousal of John's lips on him. He moaned, one hand fisting the cushion under him and the other tightening around John's head.

Suddenly, he couldn't breathe, his body arching despite himself and he felt release throughout his entire body. He tried to control the bucking of his hips, but it was no point. "Oh god...fuck..." His words were punctuated by long moans as he came hard against John's lips, feeling the man swallowing his release.

Randy didn't know how long it took him to calm, until the shaking in his body stopped and he could begin to breathe again. He reached for John blindly, pulling him up his body and capturing his lips fiercely.

"Enjoyed that?" John teased him when they pulled back.

Randy nodded, a small laugh escaping him. "Wow...yeah." He leaned forward once more and kissed John. John moaned and took control of the kiss, Randy willingly giving in to him. As his tongue entered Randy's mouth the movements of their lips were growing faster, more urgent. Their tongues moved together and Randy pressed his body against John's, unable to keep himself from moaning low in his throat as he felt him harden. John lips moved over Randy's neck, kissing his way up to the ear. Randy's hands traveled up John's skin, running them over his back. The skin was soft and smooth and Randy traced the muscles with his fingertips, moving his hands downward inside John's boxers. Grabbing his ass, Randy pulled John hard against him, making his erection rub into his own. John crushed his mouth into Randy's, his kiss deep and fierce, making Randy whimper as he snaked their tongues together. John moved his fingers over his chest, stroking the skin before moving down to Randy's erection and rubbed it back to full hardness. Randy closed his eyes and sighed with a shiver. His body jerked as John reached down between his cheeks and caressed his opening with a cum covered finger. He stroked the entrance with the tip of his finger. Bending down, he took Randy's cock into his mouth again, making it re-harden. He began working his fingers inside Randy slowly as he sucked on his member. When the tip of his finger rubbed against Randy's prostate, Randy let out a moan that made John's cock twitch. After having worked Randy with three fingers, John moved up.

Smearing his dripping pre-cum and Randy's cum onto his cock, John positioned himself at Randy's entrance. Kissing him gently, John whispered against Randy's lips, "You ready for me, baby?"

Randy shook his head and pulled him in closer. "So ready..."

John pushed in further, very slowly, biting his lip; Randy's body was so hot, and so tight. Biting his lip, he kept going until he was all the way in. He held still to let Randy adjust to him once more. Looking down, he smiled softly at the sight of his husband and he now reconnected. Randy's lips were red and swollen from kisses, his body covered with a light sheen of sweat and his eyes were sparkling and looking up at him with love.

Randy wrapped his arms around John's shoulders, and lifted his hips up. John recognized the sign and began to move; slowly at first, then his pace quickened as he kissed and sucked on Randy's neck. Randy began to cry out; he wrapped his legs around John's waist and pushed his hips up to meet John's thrusts into his body. John's control was beginning to shatter; he moved faster and faster, pushing his flesh into the hot tightness as Randy cried out, rushing fast towards the edge once more.

With one last hard thrust from John, Randy screamed out his release, his whole body shaking. The spasms and contractions around his cock made John trip over into his own release and he came with a deep moan, spurting his release inside Randy's channel before collapsing on top of the younger man.

There they lay, sweaty and trembling, staring into each other's eyes. John tried to move away but Randy kept his legs locked around his hips, keeping them connected.

John pressed a kiss to Randy's sweaty brow. "You OK, baby?"

"I'm fucking perfect," replied Randy, kissing the top of John's head. "That was amazing."

John smiled and relaxed against the younger man's body, a shiver from the cool air making him cling onto him tighter. "Yes, it was. Unfortunately, now we have to go inside. We're all sweaty and it's kind of cold out here,"

Randy laughed and rubbed up and down John's back. "No shit. I told you that when I first came out here. If we get pneumonia from being out in this, I'm gonna…"

"You're gonna take care of me and I'm gonna take care of you," interrupted John, dropping a kiss on Randy's lips. "It's what we do."

"One of us more than the other," whispered Randy, hugging John to him tightly.

John shook his head, his eyes locked onto Randy's. "You take care of me way more than you give yourself credit for, Ran. You've also given me more than I ever thought I would get in this lifetime. Please, don't ever doubt that."

Randy nodded, his throat closing with emotion at John's word. He nudged the older man up and sat up, as well, stopping to reach for the discarded blanket from earlier. He wrapped it around John's shoulders loosely, causing him to laugh. "Let's get inside to our comfy bed…"

"Well, you can get me real nice and warm in our comfy bed," replied John with a smirk as they entered their bedroom and closed the terrace doors.

"Pace yourself, old man." Randy tugged John forward and onto the bed. "You have a sexy, younger husband who wants you to be around for a really long time."

John laughed as he curled himself around Randy's body with the covers tightly wound around them. "Trust me, this old man wants to be around for as long as his sexy, younger husband will have him."

"How about for forever," whispered Randy.

John ran his fingers over Randy's lips, a soft smile on his face. "We're on our way there, baby." He leaned forward and kissed Randy's lips gently. "We'll make it."

**A/N: REVIEW!**  
**A/N: Will be contacting reviewers who have won one-shots soon. I will write one for every 50 reviews so if you are 400 and 450 and 500...you will hear from me!**


	32. Chapter 32

**A/N: So sorry for the long update wait, guys! Work has been murder! Is it summer yet? I'm ready for my two months off! **

Randy kept his head lowered towards his gym bag and the clothes he pulled out of it but from the corner of his eyes he followed John's movements. To anyone else watching John appeared to be his normal self but he knew better. The extra bounce in his step, the frantic movement of his hands and the eyes that couldn't stop darting over to the locker room door all added up to one thing; nerves. John was nervous and trying to fight against it. Randy knew John would deny it if asked but also knew he still would ask him. He finally got the opportunity to when the small crowd of youngsters around them listening to John's story disappeared, leaving him and John alone beside their lockers.

"So," he began cautiously. "Are you ready for today?"

"Baby, I'm always ready," John looked over at him with a smile and winked. "For anything," he added.

Randy rolled his eyes and took the shorts John was attempting to fold from his hand, shaking them out and folding them correctly. "I'm serious, John. Today is the first day you're seeing him since your talk the other day and you have every right to be nervous."

John frowned and shook his head. "Why would I feel nervous because of Dwayne? He's not worth my feeling nervous for."

Randy sighed and stared at John intently. "Johnny, it's ok. I feel weird and nervous around Cody. Once you've shared something so personal like sex with someone, especially in the way it happened with you and Dwayne, it's normal to feel awkward when you see them and have to talk to them and touch them…" He stopped and shook his head. "It's why I hate working with Cody."

John averted his gaze from Randy's intent stare and remained silent. Randy gently pushed John down onto the bench and knelt in front of him, grasping his hands tightly. "Johnny, you're human. It's ok to feel anxious or uncomfortable sometimes. They're normal feelings and you're entitled to them. Don't try to hide it; especially from me."

"I'm not trying to hide it from you," replied John quickly. "It's just…maybe if I act like everything's ok then it will be. It's gonna be hard enough working with Dwayne without me acting like a bubbling idiot because I'm so nervous."

Randy smiled and shook his head. "Johnny, he's probably just as nervous as you are."

"I doubt it," mumbled John with a skeptical look on his face. "He's too damn cocky to be nervous."

"Well," Randy squeezed John's hand comfortingly. "Then let him be however he wants to be, baby. All that matters is that you're facing him one more time and then you're done. You won't have to deal with him again."

John sighed and nodded. "You're right. I just have to keep reminding myself of that. Sometimes it feels like this is never gonna end; like I'm gonna be forced to work with him over and over. Sometimes I even think that he would want that."

"We all know this can't go on forever. Fans are gonna get sick of it and so will Vince." Randy looked at John sternly. "I'm gonna tell you what you've told me a hundred times already. If he's getting a kick out of working with you because he gets to put his hands on you as much as he wants, then that's his problem. He's the sad and pathetic one getting his rocks off by that. Brush it off because at the end of the day he's still gonna have to let you go and do you know why?"

John shook his head. "Why?"

"Because you're mine," replied Randy with a smile. "And at the end of the day I'm the one that's gonna get to take you home."

"Always, baby." John laughed and tugged Randy closer, kissing him fiercely. Randy wrapped his arms around John's back. He felt John shiver as his fingers trailed over the firm muscles of his back and around to caress his strong thighs. Randy pulled away from the kiss and trailed his lips down the side of John's face to his neck and sucked on the side gently.

"Well, aren't you two disgusting…"

Randy and John broke apart at the sound of Ted's voice and both men looked up to meet his smirking face.

"Are you trying to traumatize my kid so soon?"

Randy smiled and took the wiggling child from Ted's arms. He pressed a kiss to his head and held him tightly against his body. "Hey, he's gotta get used to how disgustingly loving his Godfathers are, right?"

Ted rolled his eyes and sighed dramatically. "I guess…"

Randy ignored Ted's comment and began to walk around the locker room with his Godson. "Don't pay him any attention Tater Tot. You're gonna love me and Uncle Johnny. We're gonna be the fun ones rescuing you from your boring old dad." Tate bought his hand to Randy's face and grabbed his nose. He placed a loud kiss on the palm of the infant's hand and his smiled widened as Tate giggled.

John remained sitting, a small smile on his face as he watched Randy walk around the room, completely entranced by Ted's son. There was no doubt that as much as he loved Randy, he had fallen even deeper in love with the younger man when he'd become a father. Nothing was sexier than seeing Randy interact with their daughter…or any child in general. He became softer, gentler and let his guard down completely and John loved it.

"Hello, I'm talking here,"

John blinked and turned back to Ted. "Sorry, what were you saying?"

"I was asking you why you're so distracted. I doubt it's only because of Tate," Ted smirked. "Not like it's the first time you've seen him or something."

"I'm not distracted. I'm just thinking," replied John. He turned over and watched as Randy approached. "I'm thinking how gorgeous my husband looks carrying a baby."

Randy smiled as he cradled Tate's head to his chest. "I want one, Johnny."

"Well…" John stood up, taking Tate from Randy's arms. "Why don't we just take this little guy? He'll probably thank us later in life. We're more fun than Ted and Kris anyway." He lifted Tate in the air and smiled as the boy laughed back at him. Bringing him down for a hug, John let his eyes close as he inhaled deeply the wonderful smell that came off Tate's body. The longing that had been in him for years now doubled as he held the small boy. He couldn't wait for the time when he could hold his own son; a child he and Randy could raise to be a loving, responsible and successful man and carry the Cena-Orton names into the future.

"OK, I was gonna trust you two to take care of Tate while I had my match but your discussion on kidnapping my son has me a bit freaked," Ted crossed his arms over his chest and smiled.

"You can relax, Teddy. Uncle John and Uncle Randy will keep Tater Tot perfectly safe," John continued to walk the locker room floor with Tate. "And, we'll even hand him over to you when you're back."

"Gee, thanks," replied Ted sarcastically as he headed off to the showers.

Randy smiled and walked over to John, throwing an arm loosely around his waist. "Actually, Uncle John will have to take care of Tate on his own because Uncle Randy is off to a meeting."

"What?" John's eyes widened as he looked at Randy in surprise. "You're leaving me alone with a baby. Ran, I…"

"You'll be fine. You can do this. You did it all the time with Al," interrupted Randy, a smile on his face as he rubbed John's back comfortingly.

"It's different, though. Al's ours. I felt more comfortable. Ted will kill me if I hurt Tate. It's a miracle I'm even in his life seeing as how we've only been friends for like months." John held Tate tightly against him and the small boy began to squirm in his arms. "See? He doesn't really like me. He only likes me because you like me!"

Randy's smiled widened. "Johnny, what he doesn't like is you squeezing him. Trust me, Tate loves you." He pressed a kiss to John's lips. "And, just for your information, I don't like you, Cena; I love you. You're an amazing dad so please don't doubt yourself."

John smiled and rested his head against Tate's. "Thanks, baby." He sighed deeply and looked down at Tate's big blue eyes staring back at him. "You and me will do just fine on our own, wont we, kiddo?"

"I'll try not to take too long but you know Vince and his meetings," Randy rolled his eyes before placing a final kiss on John's lips. John smiled and watched him walk away before turning his attention to Tate.

"I'm bored, kiddo. Why don't we take a walk to catering and show you off to everybody, huh?"

John walked towards the showers and moved Tate to his opposite side. "Hey, Ted! Tate and I are going to grab some lunch, OK?"

"Sure. Just grab a bottle from his bag because it's almost time for his lunch, too!" Ted called back.

"A bottle? I thought about giving him half my burger!" replied John with a smirk.

"Cena…" warned Ted.

John laughed and turned to walk away, ignoring the glare Ted shot at him as he pulled a bottle from Tate's baby bag. "And maybe some of my soda…"

Letting the door close behind him, John continued down the hall, a bounce in his step. He could hear the sound of voices increasing as he approached the catering hall. It seemed that's where most of the roster was, as usual, before their own meetings about the night's events. John looked down at Tate and smiled as he reached for his bottle. "Hungry, kiddo? Let's sit down and eat…"

John smiled at the Superstars he passed, stopping to let the Divas scattered around kiss and coo over Tate. He was finally able to grab a burger and water and sit down with Tate, both men beginning to eat their lunch. John looked down at the small boy, his eyes closed contently as he sucked at his bottle.

"You look great with a baby in your arms, John. So natural,"

John's eyes lifted at the sound of the voice from over his shoulder, widening slightly when they landed on Dwayne's body. He remained silent, his eyes watching as Dwayne moved to the side of him and took a seat in the free chair of the table he occupied.

"So, who is this little guy?"

At Dwayne's question, John knew he had to break his silence. He sighed and turned his eyes back to Tate. "This is Ted's little boy, Tate."

Dwayne smiled down at him and reached out a hand to graze Tate's hand, effectively grazing John's arm, as well. John couldn't help the flinch from Dwayne's touch and knew the older man saw.

"Well, he's beautiful. Ted is a lucky man," Dwayne pulled back and stared at John intently. "So, I haven't heard from you in awhile."

John shrugged. "There's really no point in talking about anything. I knew you would be here today and we can discuss our match now so…"

Dwayne nodded. "So, that's how it's gonna be with us from now on?"

"Dwayne, I told you already. We're not friends. There's no need for the calls and emails and texts," John sighed. "There's no point in pretending. You're here for a couple of months, barely. We're gonna have one more match and then you're gone from WWE again. Let's not act like you're gonna stick around and that this is the start of a lifelong friendship."

Dwayne shook his head. "Wow, I never realized how paranoid you are. What are you afraid of, John? Or better question, what is Randy afraid of that's he's made you want to distance yourself from me?"

John frowned. "Randy has nothing to do with this. Stop bringing him up."

"Yes, he does. We were fine before he started filling your head with shit. That has to be it." Dwayne raised an eyebrow. "Is Randy feeling a little threatened that you came to me that night? Is he worrying that it may happen again?"

John stared at Dwayne incredulously. "Are you kidding me? Are you listening to yourself?" He laughed softly in an effort to not disturb Tate. "Randy knows he doesn't have to feel threatened by anybody and therefore does not. He knows what happened between us was a drunken mistake; one that I will never be repeating."

Dwayne shrugged. "Well, I hope so. I also hope he doesn't repeat his own mistake."

John's eyes narrowed. "Don't go there. I told you once already that you have no clue what you're talking about when it comes to that."

"And I told you to stop making excuses for him. When is it gonna stop? When will you learn? You're letting Randy take everything away from you; hell, even control you!" Dwayne leaned back in his chair and looked around the room. "If these people only knew…"

"You're insane, you know that? You have no clue what you're talking about but you just keep right on talking." John tilted Tate up when he finished his bottle and began patting his back gently. "If I'm so pathetic, Dwayne, why do you want me in your life? Why are you harping on this 'friends' thing? Just do the match with me and end it. Stop worrying that busy head of yours with anything having to do with me."

"Don't I wish I could, John." Dwayne sighed. "You don't get it yet, do you? I care about you, John. I have since I came back last year and really got to watch you and know you. You're a good man and I know you love Randy but…I just don't see that love being returned to you and it kills me. You deserve better. I want you to realize that and…"

"And what," asked John sharply, his voice dripping with disdain. "Leave Randy and come to you? That will never fucking happen. Get it through your fucking head already. The only way I will ever come to you is if I'm drunk off my ass. Don't you get it? It was a one-night stand that happened only because I was plastered. It would never have happened if I was sober. I could never pick you. I have tolerated you for 2 years now because I have no choice but we have never been friends and we will never be! Now, stop throwing yourself at me because it's getting pathetic."

Dwayne's eyes narrowed somewhere along the middle of John's rant but other than that, his face betrayed no emotion. "Fine, John. Keep telling yourself that. Keep living your lie. One day when you want out, you'll find yourself alone and then you'll remember me."

John shook his head in annoyance. His eyes lowered to look at Tate and a feeling of guilt flooded him as he hugged the boy tightly. The last thing he had wanted was to lose control with Dwayne while in front of his daughter but now he had done it in front of his Godson and the feeling was just as bad.

"Dwayne, I can't do this anymore with you. Just stop and go…"

Dwayne opened his mouth to answer but before he could get a word out, another voice rang out behind John.

"Hey, babe,"

John turned over, a relieved sigh escaping him. "Hey, that meeting didn't take long."

Randy shook his head, his eyes darting between John and Dwayne. "No, thank God. How's Tate doing?"

"Fed and content," John smiled down at Tate, turning him so he could sit in his lap.

"Good," With his eyes locked on Dwayne, Randy slid a chair from the next table forward to sit in between Dwayne and John. "So, what'd I miss?"

Dwayne smiled slowly over at Randy. "Nothing much. Just complementing John on how good he looks with a baby. Nothing sexier than a man who's a good dad."

Randy's eyes narrowed but he kept the calm expression on his face as he nodded. "I agree." He turned to look at John and smiled slowly. "I'm a very lucky man."

"Nice to know that you know that," mumbled Dwayne before clearing his throat. "I was also giving Johnny some advice before you walked in."

Randy raised an eyebrow. "Really? Seems like he would ask for advice from a friend, not you."

"Nice, Orton; real nice," Dwayne smirked. "Maybe you should listen to and take some of my advice, too. I would consider giving it to you despite despising you."

Randy laughed and shook his head. "Is that so? Well, then maybe I can give you some now; like how pathetic a man who grovels is."

"Ran, don't. Just let it be, babe," mumbled John, extending a hand to squeeze Randy's knee.

"Don't worry, Johnny. We're not gonna start any trouble. I just want to issue Randy a friendly warning and then I'll be on my way," Dwayne leaned forward, his cold stare locked onto Randy. "I know what you did to John. You're a screw-up, a royal fuck-up. You got lucky with a really good guy but you don't deserve him. Everyone knows it and you know it. Realize it now and save this man any further pain. Just let him go already."

John could feel the tension in Randy's body from where his hand rested on his thigh. His heart raced with anticipation and dread. "Dwayne, are you crazy? Just stop it! You're gonna get nowhere!"

Randy glared back at Dwayne, the blood pounding in his ears. He fought to remain calm, aware of John holding Tate beside him and of the many eyes in the crowded catering hall. "You're a pathetic man who knows nothing about mine and John's relationship. I feel more pity for you than I do anger. By all means continue telling John how much of a fuck up you think I am and how you would be a better partner for him. It's gonna do no good. John and I will go on our merry way with the family we have built and you'll still be all alone, pining over a man who doesn't want you; hell, a man who doesn't even like you." He stood up and shook his head. "Replay that one night you had with John and recognize the real reason it happened; he was drunk off his ass. Relive that one night over and over while you're in bed alone and know that at that very moment, John and I are in bed together because that's his choice; what he chose to do and what he wants."

Dwayne scoffed and shook his head, "You're such an asshole. I don't get it."

Randy shrugged. "You don't have to 'get it'. I don't want you to 'get it'." He reached his hand down to John and tugged him up. "John and I don't spend our days thinking and talking about you. We've moved on and it would be best if you do the same."

He took Tate from John's arms, returning the loving smile John sent his way. "I'll see you back in the locker room, baby."

John nodded and watched him walked away. He turned back to Dwayne, who stared at him in disbelief. "Maybe know you'll get it, Dwayne. I may not be as blunt as Randy but I agree with him and what he said. I've tried to be nice but you just push too damn much…" He sighed. "I never knew you had feelings for me when I tried to befriend you before our first Wrestlemania match. I just figured it would be easier working together if we at least got along. I would've never agreed to the match if I knew and I would never have called you to that club if I'd known. Randy and I are happy. We're in a committed relationship and we're very happy in it. We have a family, one we're hoping to enlarge very soon and we're gonna be together always. We took vows and even though we broke them, we worked on fixing it and we have. Nothing will ever break us apart again. Just let it go already, OK. We do our match in a few weeks and then we part ways."

"Just get the fuck out of here, John. I can't stand to hear the sound of your voice anymore." Dwayne turned away from John and stood. He walked over to the large buffet table in the corner of the room and angrily grabbed a bottle of water. By the time he turned back over, John had disappeared and it only made him angrier.

"Hey, can I just grab a wrap from behind you…"

Dwayne's eyes shifted to his side, an eyebrow rising slightly when they landed on Cody Rhodes. He moved over and watched as the younger man quickly grabbed a chicken wrap from the tray. Cody looked up at him, a small frown on his face when he noticed Dwayne staring.

"What?"

Dwayne shook his head. "Just wondering how someone like you survived years with Orton in your tag team a few years ago."

Cody's frown deepened. "Someone like me?"

"Someone who seems so not like an asshole," replied Dwayne with a smirk.

Cody's frown disappeared as his lips curved into a smile. "Well, according to some, I'm as much of an asshole as Orton is. I disagree, of course. Randy has me beat in the asshole department, in my opinion."

"I would have to agree with that, too." Dwayne crossed his arms over his chest. "So, if you think Orton is an asshole, why did you end up in bed with him?"

Cody's eyes widened and the plate wavered in his hand. "What? What are you talking about?"

"Relax, Rhodes. I know the truth," Dwayne lowered his voice and leaned in close to Cody's body. "John told me before he dragged me into bed with him a few months ago."

Cody's mouth dropped open slightly and he had to set the plate down on the table. "Are you serious? John slept with you? You're lying,"

Dwayne shook his head and grabbed a piece of chicken from Cody's plate. He quickly swallowed it down and said, "No, I'm not and you know it. How else would I know about you and Randy?"

Cody shook his head, his eyes lowering. "My God…I can't believe John would cheat on Randy. I mean, how could he when its not like Randy did what he did on pur…" He stopped abruptly and cleared his throat. "Whatever. It doesn't matter anyway. What happened was such a long time ago and he and John have worked past it apparently so I don't care. You shouldn't either."

"But I do care, Rhodes and I know you do, too. Everyone knows that you've always had a boner for Orton. We've all known since you were a skinny little kid following him around like a dog." Dwayne frowned and looked at Cody intently. "I can't believe you got a taste then let him go back to John so easily."

"John made sure I stayed away from him. He beat the shit out of me and left me unconscious on my hotel room floor. I wasn't willing to go through that again so I let it go," Cody shrugged. "Why do you care anyway?"

"Because I want Cena and I can't have him until Orton is out of the way," Dwayne smiled. "So, why don't I help you get Orton and you help me get Cena. If they come to us willingly, the other can't be upset, right?"

Cody stared at Dwayne, sizing him up with his eyes as he contemplated the older man's words. "Are you serious?"

"Like a heart attack," replied Dwayne. "I scratch your back and you scratch mine. But it stays between us, understood. Plans falls apart and I don't know you, kid."

Cody smirked and slowly nodded. "Likewise but I think we should add one more person to this little plan of ours; Brock."

Dwayne frowned. "Lesnar? Why? What help to this could he possibly be?"

"Oh, you have no idea, Dwayne. Let's just say that Brock is an essential part to splitting Randy from John and you're gonna be real happy he's on board," replied Cody with a laugh.

"Why would Lesnar want anything to do with this? What's in it for him? I mean, you get Orton and I get Cena but he gets nothing yet he's gonna help?" Dwayne frowned. "I don't get it."

"Randy and John went on to be stars in the WWE while Brock bounced from one thing to another; football, UFC, blah, blah, blah. It's made him a little bitter so he would get something from this," Cody's smile widened. "A lot of fulfillment in seeing them crumble,"

Dwayne's eyes widened. "Well, then by all means, bring Lesnar aboard and let's get this started."

Cody nodded, the small inkling of guilt working its way into his brain being quickly pushed away. He wanted Randy and this time he would have him for longer than one night…and he didn't care how it happened.

**A/N: Had to add Ted Dibiase's son in this chapter because he is just the cutest thing! Look up Ted's Twitter to see pics of him if you don't know what he looks like because he's just a doll! **

**A/N 2: Review and let me know what you think about the chapter if you can. If not, it's OK! I appreciate all my readers, review or not! Will update soon! **


	33. Chapter 33

**A/N: Happy Spring, readers. This is kind of a filler chapter for the story until we get into more of Dwayne and Cody's evil plot…**

"Daddy!"

John's eyes snapped back over to Alanna. "What, Ally? Please don't scream!"

Alanna shrugged, a guilty expression on her face. "Sorry but I called you and you ignored me."

John sighed and walked over to the swing set where Alanna sat. "I'm sorry, sweetheart but my head is not in its right place today."

"Yes, it is, Daddy. It's on your neck! That's its right place." Alanna giggled at her own joke and even John had to smile. "I guess you're right, baby."

He pulled back Alanna's swing and let her go, letting her distract herself with the act of swinging. He found his mind wandering again and wished Randy would get home already. The younger man's trip to get some lunch for all of them seemed to be taking forever.

"Daddy, you wanna swing with me? You look so sad,"

John looked over at Alanna and smiled. "No, thank you, sweetheart. I'm a little too big for your swing set."

Alanna nodded and jumped off the swing when John bought it to a stop. She walked over to him and wrapped her arms as far as she could around his waist. "Don't be sad, Daddy."

John's smile widened at his daughter's sweetness and he bent to pick her up. "I'm not sad, baby. I'm just a little tired."

Alanna looped her arms around John's neck and smiled. "So, let's go inside. Maybe we can eat a snack because I'm really hungry. When is Daddy getting back?"

"That's a good question," mumbled John as he walked back in through his open backyard doors. He walked directly into the kitchen and set Alanna on the counter. "He should be back with lunch soon, babe so I don't want to give you anything to ruin your appetite."

"Maybe just a little cookie…" said Alanna hopefully.

John smiled back at her and sighed. He reached into the cupboards and pulled out a box of cookies, quickly handing one to Alanna and taking one for himself.

"Thanks, Daddy," Alanna quickly ate her cookie and focused her attention on John. "Why are you tired? We didn't do anything yesterday but the barbecue."

John walked back over to the counter and leaned against where Alanna sat. "You didn't do anything but Daddy and I did. We had to cook all the food for Teddy and his family and us and then we had to clean up…"

"You did not cook! Daddy doesn't let you in the kitchen," interrupted Alanna with a smile.

John's mouth dropped open and he playfully shoved Alanna. "Excuse me, brat! I did help Daddy cook. I had to watch the chicken on the grill and cut up the potatoes…"

Alanna stared at John, the smile still on her face. "OK, Daddy." Her eyes suddenly widened and she reached for John's hand. "Can we call Teddy and ask him to bring Tate over again? I liked taking care of him!"

John nodded. "I know you did, baby but Tate has to spend today with his parents. Teddy wants to enjoy him before they hit the road again, you know."

Alanna's smile faded. "Oh, OK. I just like having him around but it's OK."

John quickly picked up Alanna and hugged her tightly. "Don't be sad, sweetheart. He'll come back to visit soon."

"When can I have a baby brother of my own that will never go away? You and Daddy promised me one, remember?"

With Alanna's intent stare boring into him, John sighed. "Hopefully soon, Ally. We have to wait for the adoption agency to call us. Daddy and I explained it to you and we told you it may take awhile to get a call. We have to be patient."

Alanna pouted and rested her head on John's shoulder. "But I'm all alone,"

"You are not alone, Alanna," responded John sternly. "You have me and your other Daddy and you have a Mommy and grandparents and aunts and uncles and we all love you so much. How could you ever feel alone, baby?"

Alanna slowly smiled. "I meant I'm the only kid."

"Well, let's hope it's not for much longer," John pressed a kiss to Alanna's forehead and hugged her tight. "Why don't you just enjoy being the only child from now on and let yourself be spoiled rotten?"

Alanna giggled and nodded, keeping her arms looped around John's neck. He let his cheek rest gently on her hair, enjoying the moment of peace with his daughter. The sound of a car pulling into the driveway bought him back to the present and John walked over to the front door with Alanna in his arms.

"Looks like Daddy's finally home,"

John balanced Alanna on one arm and walked out of the front door and into the warm Florida weather. He approached Randy's car just as the younger man exited. "Hey, babe. Did you have to go to the farm to get the cow for the burgers?"

Randy rolled his eyes as he pulled out the bags of food. "It's not gonna take me 5 minutes to get lunch for all of us when we all have such crazy specifications. I mean, who orders a burger with cheddar, onions and jalapeno on one half and Swiss, avocado and barbecue dressing on the other?"

John shrugged. "I do. It's what makes me unique."

"It's what makes you batshit crazy," replied Randy with a smile.

"Daddy, that's not a nice word." Alanna frowned at Randy in displeasure and he quickly pressed a kiss to her nose. "Sorry, baby."

John took a bag from Randy's loaded hands and tugged him forward. "Come on; we're hungry."

"Yeah, Daddy and I had to eat cookies because you took so long," added Alanna.

Randy's eyes widened and turned to John. "You gave her cookies?"

John smiled sheepishly as he let Alanna go to the ground and run off into the kitchen. "It was just one. We were so hungry, baby."

Randy shook his head and headed for the kitchen counter. He quickly spread out all the food and took Alanna her plate. John busied himself with digging out his and Randy's food into plates but didn't take them to the table. He motioned Randy back over to him and the younger man frowned in confusion.

"What's wrong?"

John quickly shook his head. "It's nothing major, don't worry. I just wanted to give you the heads up that Ally seems to be on another woe is me kick. She was complaining about being the only kid again and asking when she's gonna have a brother."

Randy sighed and threw at quick glance to his side at their daughter. "I was wondering when she would start that up again. I figure it has something to do with spending the day with Tate yesterday?"

John nodded. "Yeah. I told her that it's gonna happen; she just has to be patient." He shrugged. "I understand how hard that is, though."

Randy moved closer to John, wrapping an arm around his waist and letting his forehead rest against John's. "It's gonna happen, baby. Keep thinking positive. Someone picked us once and someone will pick us again."

John lifted his lips slightly to join with Randy's in a soft kiss. "You're right. I know you are. It's just…"

"It's just that you want a little boy," finished Randy. He smiled and stroked John's back soothingly. "I get that, babe. So do I. I can't wait to have a little boy with you and to teach him how to grow up and be an amazing man like you are."

"And you are. I want our son to have just as much of you as he has of me. I want him to have your strength, Ran," John smiled and raised his hand to Randy's chest. "And your heart; your heart that loves so fiercely."

"We're gonna have our son, baby. Just have patience. It's gonna happen for us," Randy joined his lips with John one more time. "Things are only getting better for us in the future. The dog days are over, Cena."

John rolled his eyes but smiled. "Let's hope so…"


	34. Author's Note

My dear Readers,

I'm so sorry I haven't updated in so long. There was an unexpected death in my family which has hit me very hard. It has taken away my desire for most things, including writing, which I love so much. I will not abandon this story but for now, I must put it on hold.

I hope when I return to writing, I have all of you still interested.

Hugs, AuntJackie


	35. Chapter 34

**A/N: Look who found her love of writing again after grieving my beloved cousin's unexpected death and fighting a case of plagiarism! I want to dedicate this chapter to all my lovely readers who sent me condolences and to all my fellow writers and readers who helped my fight my plagiarism battle with that looney toon on Archive of Our Own! I got great news from them when they told me they found other stories on her profile besides my own that she copied so they deleted them all but I was disappointed to see her profile was allowed to remain. In my opinion, once you have been caught as a plagiarist, you should be banned from the site! But, any way, thank you to all of you for your support. I hope you enjoy this chapter and thanks for waiting so long for an update! **

"Where the fuck is he, Rhodes? You told me he wanted in on this; that he would help! But now he can't even show up on fucking time? Or fucking call? What the hell?"

Cody rolled his eyes discretely, not fazed by Dwayne's anger but also not looking to incite it further. "I don't know, D. Maybe something happened. He'll be here soon, don't worry."

"You're the one who should worry," Dwayne glared at Cody and stopped his pacing. He finally leaned against the desk and stared over at the younger man. "So, since we're just sitting here shooting the shit, why don't you be real with me? You're practically vibrating. I guess whatever taste Orton gave you that night was real good."

Cody narrowed his eyes and looked away. "Talking about how good the taste was is not part of the deal, man."

Dwayne shrugged. "Hey, fine, don't tell me. If you're gonna act all shy and shit. I don't mind telling you that I liked the taste John gave me."

"I didn't ask, man," replied Cody with a laugh. Dwayne smirked over at him and shrugged. He lowered his body to the hotel room bed and glanced at his watch again. "Jesus, I'm gonna die in this shithole. C'mon, Rhodes. Talk to me and distract me from wanting to kill Lesnar. Just tell me how you managed to break through Orton's ice wall and drag him into bed."

"Why?" asked Cody in frustration. "Why are we talking about this shit? It's not like we're chics! Besides, you haven't told me shit about how you got John in bed!"

"We were at a bar in Tampa, had a couple drinks and then headed to his house. We got to fuck in the Orton-Cena marital bed. Shit was awesome," answered Dwayne with a laugh.

Cody frowned. "So, you were both drunk? That's how you got John in bed?"

Dwayne shrugged. "Drunk is relative. I happen to think we were just tipsy. John knew what he was doing. Did it so well that I'm here looking for another round." He winked over at Cody. "Now, it's your turn. Spill."

Cody sighed and shook his head. It was clear now that Dwayne wasn't going to stop. "We were all hanging out at the hotel bar and John came down to lecture Randy for being out after curfew or something, who knows. They looked like they had a little argument and then John left and Randy came back to the table. He stayed awhile, drank a bit then went outside with Brock. They were out there for awhile when I went to say good night and then Brock tells me he and Randy were getting high again. he threw him in my arms and told me to take care of him so we went up to my room because I knew John would kill him if he saw him like that. When we got up to the room, though, Ran starts taking his and my clothes off and throwing himself at me. One thing led to another and…" He trailed off and shrugged.

Dwayne frowned over at him but an amused smile crept out. "So, you got Randy in bed with you because he was high as a kite and you have to nerve to give me shit because John had a few drinks in him? Really, Rhodes?"

Before Cody could respond, the door burst open and Brock walked in. He sauntered into the room, smirk in place and large bottle of water in his hands. "What's up, losers?"

Dwayne turned over to him, his question to Cody now forgotten. "Where the fuck have you been? Jesus, we've been waiting for your ass for over an hour!"

"Well, then you waited. Why should I run for you two assholes?" Brock turned his cold stare to Dwayne. "I'm doing you two a favor. Don't you even think of pushing me."

Cody quickly stood and walked over to where Brock stood. He grabbed the older man's arms gently but still tightly enough to make an impact. "Enough, guys. We're all here for different reasons, whatever they may be. We need to learn to work together cause if not we might as well just go home."

Brock pulled his arm away from Cody. "Give that lecture to this asshole."

"I'm giving it to both you assholes," responded Cody sharply, his annoyance slipping over. "What the fuck is wrong with this picture? It's not bad enough that what we're attempting to do is already hard as hell but if we're gonna have any shot in hell of making it work, we need to put all our differences aside. Just let it go; all of it; the egos and the bullshit holier than thou attitudes because none of us are really entitled to them anyway."

Dwayne's eyes shifted to Cody. "Well, well, well. Look who has developed a spine since I last saw him."

"I've always had a spine. I've also just grown up now. I know what I want and I'm willing to do whatever I have to do to get it," replied Cody.

"Even if that means getting Orton high enough to fuck him again," Brock laughed loudly and collapsed onto the chair Cody had abandoned. "Cause we all know that's what really happened…"

"Don't, Brock,"

"Don't, what, Codes? I'm just teasing you. God knows I can't pass judgment on anyone." Brock shrugged and leaned back.

Cody rolled his eyes and mumbled, "No shit."

"All right, fine. Let's just stop this and follow Rhodes' advice. We're gonna need each other if we want this shit to work. Apparently we all bring something to the package." Dwayne sighed and looked over at Brock. "And as much as I hate to admit it, you seem to bring a huge chunk to the package. Breaking John and Randy apart depends on Randy going back to his old ways and you seem to be the key to making that happen, Lesnar. We need your ability to fuck with his head."

Brock scoffed. "Hey, I'll try it but it won't be easy. The only reason he got high last time was because he didn't know he was getting high!"

Dwayne raised his famous eyebrow. "What?"

"I gave him a laced cigarette. He didn't know it was laced. When he found out, he freaked and with that freak-out he lost whatever trust he had in me. This isn't gonna be easy." Brock shrugged. "But I'll give it my all."

"Wait a minute," Dwayne turned his gaze over to Cody, who stood by quietly. "Did you know Brock was gonna give Orton something?"

Cody shook his head and avoided Dwayne's gaze. "No, why would I have known?"

"So, you didn't know but you still took advantage of a damn good situation, right?" Dwayne smirked over at the younger man. "Wow, didn't know you had it in you, Codes."

Cody shook his head slightly, his gaze still trained on the floor.

"He doesn't have it in him. He tried to pretend he has it but he doesn't."

Cody lifted his gaze up from the floor and locked onto Brock's smirking face. "Excuse me?"

"You're a lightweight, Rhodes. You've idolized Randy from day fucking one and when you finally got your chance to jump his bones, you did it but you've been killing yourself about it ever since." Brock's smirk deepened. "You know damn well what happened between you and Orton that night was only because he was high as a kite. And you know the only way it will ever happen again is if he's high again. He doesn't want you, Codes."

"Fuck off, Brock. Does anyone want your ass? Where's your wife?" shot back Cody angrily.

"Enough! Cut it out!" interrupted Dwayne before Brock could shoot back an angry retort. "Rhodes, we need to know if you're gonna have an attack of guilty conscience and bail on us. Are you really in or not?"

"Yes, I'm in. I don't care what you two think of me but trust that I don't have any guilty feelings in me whatsoever." Cody's gaze hardened as he stared at both men. "I want what I want and I'm willing to do whatever I have to do to get it."

"Well, so am I." Dwayne shrugged. "And I don't know the meaning of the word guilty. Eventually, Orton and Cena will thank us."

Brock scoffed once more. "Jesus, you two are deluded. But, hey, I'm not complaining. I hate those two assholes. Whatever it takes to bring 'em down…I'm in."

"Then, we're all on the same page; whatever it takes." Cody slowly smiled. "We tear them down and apart and then I get Randy and D gets John and Brock gets to reclaim his throne as the king of the WWE ring. Sound good?"

"Sounds fucking perfect. The problem is, how are we gonna make it happen?" asked Brock, his gaze alternating between both men. "Randy doesn't trust you for shit and I heard about the little incident at catering with Cena and Rock."

"Looks like we're gonna have to eat a little crow, gentlemen." Dwayne sighed and stood up. He began to pace around the room. "I'll start trying to work things out with John; apologize and shit for what I've said and done and act all remorseful. I suggest you do the same with Randy, Cody. We gotta lay the foundation or else this plan will never work."

"You're right. This is gonna take some time," mumbled Cody.

"Hell yeah it is. Probably more than both you two realize. Orton and Cena can't stand your two asses. All this drama did was bring them closer together so you two better start praying to Jesus." Brock laughed loudly. "And so should I because only he knows how the hell I'm gonna get in Orton's head again."

"We'll figure it out," replied Cody. "We have to figure it out."

* * *

"So…"

Randy rolled his eyes discretely as he set Alanna's backpack down on the floor of Sam's house. "What?"

"How are things going?"

Randy turned over, the annoyance in his face clear. "Things? What things? What do you want to know, Sam? Just ask it."

Sam quickly held her hands up and walked away. "Relax, geez. God, you're always so defensive." She continued on into the kitchen and grabbed a water bottle from the refrigerator. "I just want to talk like two normal people would do. Does it bother you that I'm trying to keep the relationship between us cordial? I mean, first John bites my head off when I ask him how things are going…"

"John did not bite your head off, Sam. He just doesn't appreciate you prying into our private life and neither do I," interrupted Randy as he leaned against the island of his former kitchen.

"I'm not prying, Randy. I'm merely interested because whatever happens between you and John concerns our daughter." Sam sighed softly. "And Alanna did come to me with some concerns about you and John. She was very worried by some mean behavior between the two of you, as she called it."

Randy shook his head. "Look, John and I took care of it, OK. We explained to Al how grownups get stressed or tired and aren't always smiling and happy. Just because we're quiet doesn't mean we're upset with each other or having problems."

"Oh," mumbled Sam.

"I would expect her to question John and me when we're in funk because of work and shit, Sam but not you. You're an adult and should know better." Randy crossed his arms over his chest.

"Enough, Randy. No need to lecture me like you would lecture Ally. You and John are fine; I get it." Sam took a sip of her water. "You can go now. Travel safe."

Randy smiled and shook his head. "As always, thanks for the hospitality." He turned and headed towards the door. His eyes landed on his car and his step quickened. Dropping off his daughter with Sam was always a hard thing to do as Alanna tended to cling to him and John and not want them to leave. Sam's behavior, though, did not make him want to linger in the house. While she tried her hardest to call herself cordial to him and John, Randy saw it for what it was; a fakeness she had developed after their divorce and his and John's marriage. He didn't know what it was; jealousy, resentment, anger. Whatever it was, he didn't care.

"That took longer than I expected," John grinned over at Randy as he slid into the passenger side of the car. He noticed the annoyed look on his partner's face but didn't mention it until he started the car and drove off Sam's property. "Everything went OK?"

Randy sighed, his head leaning back against the seat. "Yeah, just the usual irritation,"

John laughed and nodded. "OK…"

"She just has to pry and always has a comment for everything," Randy sighed. "I wish she would mind her own damn business…or find a man to occupy her damn time with."

"Baby," John began slowly. "I never thought I would say this but, Sam has a right to be worried if Ally seems concerned about something. She also has a right to ask us about it if Ally confides in her that she's worried about us. She's her mom and she wants to be kept in the loop as much as possible. I can't blame her for that because we want to be kept in the loop as much as possible, too, don't we? I mean, imagine if Sam does get married again one day. Won't we want to be certain Ally is living in a happy environment when she's with Sam? Well, that's all Sam wants to be sure of when Ally's with us. Just because she questions us about something doesn't mean she's trying to pry or be a busybody. It could just be that she's being an involved mom, which is what she's supposed to be."

Randy stared at John for a moment before rolling his eyes. "Why the hell do you always have to be so damn sensible, Cena? Why can't you let me be in my misery and annoyance and think the worst of people?"

"Because that's not healthy for you, Orton. I told you I want us to grow old and gray together. We can't if you die of a heart attack because of stress," replied John with a smile. "It's my job to protect you, gorgeous."

Randy smiled and reached his hand forward to rest on John's thigh. "You do a good job at it. I don't know what I'd do without you by my side to keep me sane...amongst other things."

John moved his hand off the steering wheel momentarily to squeeze the hand Randy rested on his thigh. "We're ying and yang, babe. No one's ever gonna break us apart."

**A/N: Gimme some reviews, all! Again, thanks for waiting so patiently. **


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